Shaun

just saw a pro england post and almost threw up. knock it off.

Malcom in the Middle Ages

You’re not the lord of me now

*old man voice* back in my day tik tok was a ke$ha song

this is actual murder this man will fucking die

the car isn’t real. it’s simply a moving image on an electronic screen. the man is safe from vehicles

my pockets jingle with stolen buttons from hot topic

i literally cant stop stealing those buttons from the Button Vats like i dont feel like paying 3 dollars for a piece of tin with pusheen on it but i do feel like doing a heist

call the cops bitch ill have sex with them

This feels like a the kind of thing you overhear when the person next to you on the bus is having a heated phone call

HOW IS THIS REAL

IM GOING TO FUCKING CRY

anakin: hey obi wan guess what *makes beeping sound* obi wan, scared: how the fuck are you doing that with your mouth