切ない

                        ɴᴏᴡʜᴇʀᴇ ᴛᴏ ʀᴜɴ ɴᴏᴡ, ɴᴏ ᴛɪᴍᴇ ᴛᴏ ɢʀɪᴇᴠᴇ

                          no oтнer cнoιceѕ, ιт'ѕ dιe or вelιeve

                      ℕ𝕠𝕥 𝕓𝕒𝕔𝕜𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕕𝕠𝕨𝕟, 𝕎𝕖'𝕣𝕖 𝕤𝕥𝕒𝕟𝕕𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕒𝕥 𝕝𝕒𝕤𝕥

        Ⓓⓔⓕⓔⓐⓣ 𝚊𝚗𝚍 🇩​🇪​🇯​🇪​🇨​🇹​🇪​🇩​ 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚙𝚊𝚜𝚝

                        ɴᴏᴡʜᴇʀᴇ ᴛᴏ ʀᴜɴ ɴᴏᴡ, ɴᴏ ᴛɪᴍᴇ ᴛᴏ ɢʀɪᴇᴠᴇ

                          no oтнer cнoιceѕ, ιт'ѕ dιe or вelιeve

                      ℕ𝕠𝕥 𝕓𝕒𝕔𝕜𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕕𝕠𝕨𝕟, 𝕎𝕖'𝕣𝕖 𝕤𝕥𝕒𝕟𝕕𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕒𝕥 𝕝𝕒𝕤𝕥

        Ⓓⓔⓕⓔⓐⓣ 𝚊𝚗𝚍 🇩​🇪​🇯​🇪​🇨​🇹​🇪​🇩​ 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚙𝚊𝚜𝚝

( please feel free to change pronouns as necessary ! )

“How should I smile?” 

“Is this too wide?”

“Should I look lonely?” 

“So he can comfort me”

“You were sweet a minute ago”

“Now you look sullen all of a sudden” 

“What’s the big deal”

“I got you before”

“Now I don’t anymore” 

“You’re completely different”

“Should I pretend to be mad?”

“What if he ignores me back?” 

“Doesn’t he know that I’m flirting?”

“Are you a princess or a player?” 

“The more I think, the more confused I get” 

“You’re a mystery”

“The more we fight, the closer we get” 

“I try not to care but end up missing you”

“I want you to try to understand”

“I want to get through to your heart” 

“The more I try to stop, the faster my heart beats”

“All I have is you in my heart”

“Can I love you?”

“How many scores do I get?”

“What should I do to be with you?” 

“I will do it all”

“I’m still new to love” 

“You’re my tutor”

“Don’t care how much you score as long as we’re together” 

“I will be fine”

“I’ll be good” 

“I’ll earn my score” 

“Keep doing good and one day I’ll win your heart” 

“Put your hand on my cheek and do it some more”

“Once you’ve got my heart, you’ll be gone” 

“Eyes locked and we get closer”

“They say intimacy is bliss”

“Let’s get intimate and let’s kiss”

warning for nsfw content, swearing, and possible alcohol. feel free to change pronouns as needed!

- you know what, im sick of all the weirdos here. goodbye.

- he’s so stupid, i love him.

- he’s the wither from minecraft.

- NOOO HE IS MELTING!!!

- i’m surprised i havent been confronted yet.

- if i have to see one of those fuckers say one more horny thing, im drinking from the bottle.

- i may be a sore loser, but at least i’m not a sore winner.

- stop calling ___ jacksepticeye, i’m gonna die.

- i thought that said “homo” and i was gonna say “you sure are”

- “everyone’s so mean to me” yeah and i’m gonna keep being mean.

- i listened to arms tonite and i got hit by the transgenderfication beam.

- shut the fuck up, i’m listening to dear you and crying in my chair again.

- i sure do enjoy napping.

“is  cereal  soup?”

“what  if  instead  of  policemen,  there  were  giant,  man-sized  police  spiders?”

“what  is  the  sexiest  name  you  can  imagine?”

“what  is  the  least  sexy  name  you  have  ever  heard?”

“what  secret  conspiracy  would  you  like  to  start?”

“what’s  the  weirdest  smell  you  have  ever  smelled?”

“is  a  hotdog  a  sandwich?”

“what’s  the  most  ridiculous  fact  you  know?”

“how  do  you  feel  about  putting  pineapple  on  pizza?”

“if  animals  could  talk,  which  would  be  the  rudest?”

“toilet  paper,  over  or  under?”

“what  if  we  can  breath  on  space  but  the  government  just  tells  us  we  can’t  so  we  don’t  try  to  escape?”

“what  if  there  are  actually  multiple  souls  in  your  body,  but  you’re  the  most  powerful  and  the  voices  you  hear  in  your  head  are  just  the  weaker  soulds  talking  to  you?”

“what’s  the  best  type  of  cheese?”

“how  many  chickens  would  it  take  to  kill  an  elephant?”

“which  body  part  do  you  wish  you  could  detach?”

“if  peanut  butter  wasn’t  called  peanut  butter,  what  would  it  be  called?”

“what  movie  do  you  think  would  be  greatly  improved  if  it  was  made  into  a  musical?”

“what  would  be  the  coolest  animal  to  scale  up  to  the  size  of  a  horse?”

“if  you  could  replace  all  of  the  grass  in  the  world  with  something  else,  what  would  it  be?”

“if  you  had  to  choose  one  animal  to  help  you  win  a  fight,  which  animal  would  you  choose?”

“if  you  could  morph  two  animals  to  make  one  super  animal,  what  two  animals  would  you  choose?”

“if  animals  could  talk  which  animal  do  you  think  would  be  the  most  polite?

"what  are  your  thoughts  on  me  liking  to  dance  naked  while  listening  to  one  direction?”

“if  you  could  say  one  sentence  that  the  whole  world  would  be  able  to  hear,  what  would  you  say?”

“what  conspiracy  theories  do  you  believe?”

“what’s  one  superpower  you  would  not  want?”

“what  if  the  only  reason  we  can’t  walk  through  mirrors  is  because  our  reflection  blocks  us?”

“would  you  have  sex  with  a  clone  of  yourself?”

“what  would  be  your  name  be  if  you  were  a  spice  girl?”

“if  you  were  a  hotdog  and  you  were  starving,  would  you  eat  yourself?”

if you look past the thorns

Just once,

You might see the rose.

         these may be quotes from outside sources, but i’ve gathered them from my likes on the app

Bold of you fucks to assume that I’m not god.

Which one of you MOTHERFUCKERS snitched on ME to my MOM?!

I’m coming for your left shoes and I’m shitting in ‘em, buddy.

Oops, my heart went…FUCK

You have been summoned to the house of VIBE for your VIBE CHECK

You have FAILED the vibe check

*brandishing a knife* cuddle me

i’m baby, and i’m fucking cute

One day, I wanna be rich enough that my big fridge has a lil fridge.

Shiny knick knacks go click clack *shakes [small objects] together*

If your tongue sticks to it when you lick it it’s a bone! *clap clap*

The gods don’t want to fuck you!! Stop!!

*tapping rhythmically* I’m bored in the house and I’m in the house bored.

I was single for a long time, like a LONG time. But then I met the love of my life. He is my boyfriend - he doesnt know it yet, but he is.

I prefer my puns intended.

I was doing stuff with my star sign and I was NOT prepared to learn that the MOON knows I’m GAY

I don’t know what happened but the toilet is smoking! ( cut to inside a bathroom, two rolls of toilet paper have been placed on the closed lid to resemble eyes, and a tube is pinned between the lid and seat, resembling a cigar )

The only b-word i’ll ever call you is beautiful. (a pause) i love you, bitch.

You’re the best kind of fucking person and I would die for you

I’m shaving my legs, then I’m on my way

Do you know who gets sent in when people want to act a fool? This basic bitch who’s secretly FULL OF RAGE

I don’t know why people call it the roof of their mouth when it’s the ceiling

There’s the saying ‘you are what you eat’…now i’m concerned for the people who say ‘i’m baby’

I was just walking outside and it looks like someone fell (evidence that they are the one that fell) i feel bad for that idiot

Who the FUCK is playing music at 2 in the morning?!

Look, what I’m saying is an apology is not worth saying if you don’t feel bad about what you did and it’s not really an apology unless it features an admission of fault and a promise to not repeat the behavior

I’m….so sorry….i’ve learned….my lesson (throws an object to distract and runs away)

I believe there are aliens in the ocean and nobody ever fucking listens to me

I just found out what a biblically correct angel looks like and honestly, i’m scared

The neighbors don’t take care of their dog so i guess it’s mine now

Sure my body’s a temple, but you know what? Some temples are unkempt and falling apart and maybe a little bit haunted.

The point of golf is to play less golf.

Your bones are wet.

Beef jerky is just meat raisens.

I’m a top! I may be a crop top, but I’m still a fucking top. 

I’m big spoon. I may be a backpack, but I’m big spoon.

Alexa, turn off my emotions.

God making me was like, “little bit of sugar, little bit of spice, little bit of everything nice…and a big ol’ heaping handful of BITCH.”

Listen here you delicious fuck, I like you.

Are cakes with filling just really thick sandwiches?

That’s…that’s it? That’s your evil villain excuse?

L is for the way you lie to me. O is for the others that you see. *voice cracking* V….

Avril Lavigne? You mean the chick who’s married to Nickelback?

This dude thinks he can seduce me with his jawline? *a scoff* He’s right.

You want to take a shower? You gotta knock on the wall and ask the water to come out nicely.

I’m just saying, when you go underwater, you enter a dimension where you can fly but you can’t breathe.

In other news, the sexual position known as 69 will now be called 96. Due to the economy, the cost of eating out has gone up.