Insert Witty Title Here

My money... TAKE ALL OF IT

Hello friends. I'm around so I wanted to let you know that I'm alive. Things are going (not necessarily well) and I still draw breath. I DO have many things to tell you, but like always the plans are not yet set in stone so im going to wait to talk about it until they are in order to avoid over promising again.

I'm sure I've never said this before, but I really need to update here more often.  Every day life tries to kill you and recently it's been doing a very enthusiastic job of trying so I've been slacking in my posting of snarky things.  Generally I come on here and <3 the sexy posts but I SWEAR I'll try harder to provide the entertainment you came here for. 

So my band, Set 4 Stun, is FINALLY going to hit the stage tomorrow night for the first time.  It's an Open Mic night, so there really is no guarantee that we will actually get to play, but we feel confident that we're going to get on and prolly play three songs. I won't lie, I'm nervous, but not so much for the music, more so for the outfit I'll be wearing.  We all decided to wear suits/cheesy suits.  My thing is that I'm TRYING to go steampunk with it, but I wasn't prepared to dress up for this open mic, I thought I would save it for our first booked gig, but Sunday night I was told that everyone would be dressing up.  So I'm throwing together what I can on short notice and very limited budget:  Dress shirt, khaki pants tucked into my Doc Martins, suspenders and a bowtie.  It's not much, but it's a start and will be the first time I introduce the Pablo Pantalones character to the world.  I'll let you know how it goes.

Employee Appreciation Lunch. Only the best !!

Hells Yez. Tomorrow is the semi-annual employee appreciation luncheon/picnic at City Hall. Hot dogs, hamburgers, beans, coleslaw, Greek Salad, ice cream.... I cant wait. YOU should look forward to stupid filtered pics around lunchtime.

When I was in highschool I was dating a girl a year behind me. We decided that to save money, we would skip my senior prom and go to hers instead so that it would be more special for her. After I graduated we continued dating but about halfway through the year we broke up. A short while after her prom, we started dating again and she told me about how she went to her prom with a guy, got bored with him, went home with a different guy, and fucked him in her car at the beach. This is the same girl who, before I started dating her, kept her virginity intact by only having anal sex with random guys in the low brass section of the band.

Sunset on Clearwater Beach

So in other news, my daughter has decided to live with me and the boys again.  Apparently Mom and her boyfriend are BOTH unemployed now and planning to move to Ohio or some shit.  I hope that the daughter chose to live with me because she realizes that I am honest and loving, not just that I'm NOT the one moving to Ohio.  Only time will tell but this is a good start

I think that's it for now.  Stay tuned and remind me to post more.  Also, send newds for christsake... you people are sexy.

If under "The Most Private Thing I'm Willing To Admit" you respond with something like "If it's private I'm not going to admit it here", then you're a dumbass and you're doing it wrong.  Also, you are not interesting and revealing that is the kiss of death for you.

If under "The First Things People Notice About Me Are" you list "My Eyes", or "My Smile", then chances are good that it's your tits.

#hasthtag #parenthetical