ranking post-1900s presidents by how moe they were IN MY OPINION:
TEDDY ROOSEVELT: 5/10 i know it's named after him or whatever but he fr does remind me of a teddy bear ... i think its the tiny glasses i dunno ... reasonably moe and a very good starter
WILLIAM HOWARD TAFT: 6/10 kind of looks like teddy if you squint but as a fat person who fucks with fat people im obligated to give him an extra point for the 340+ pounds. yes im doing corruption what about it
WARREN G. HARDING: 2/10 don't know much about him but the brows just aren't moe im sorry. he looks like he would kin greely from animal jam though so if this was a greely kin competition he would be 10/10, however it isn't so
CALVIN COOLIDGE: 7/10 and i know what people are gonna say . youre gonna be like oh search coolidge doesnt look cute at all . but sleeping for 13 hours a day is in fact the most moe thing you can do as a grown man ... that and have a pet raccoon named rebecca which he Did so he Is ok its myfucking tierlist shit up
HERBERT HOOVER: 8/10 reminds me of a bulldog very round face very moe. would be easy to chibify into a little sanrio thing . herbert is also a very silly and auraless name which adds moe points. our strongest contender yet???
FRANKLIN D. ROOSEVELT: 2/10 sorry rooroo i know you basically won ww2 but you're not really moe .... maybe you can win the old man competition though ....... sorryyy
HARRY S. TRUMAN: 8/10 similar to hoover this guy has a round face and silly first name, BUT he also has the teddy roosevelt glasses ... launching two atomic bombs at civilians is not moe behaviour though . so i docked the extra glasses point . next time i would recommend not launching two atomic bombs at civilians hope it helps you buddy
DWIGHT D. EISENHOWER: 5/10 sort of reminds me of kermit the frog in a way that i can't quite verbalise. #we like ike or whatever ... also not really moe but that one zesty picture of him is soooo funny it endears me a bit . ike is a cute name but dwight is Okayish i guess
JOHN F. KENNEDY: 9/10 notice how when people talk about why they find him charming its usually related to his youthfulness... hes the youngest person ever..............like a puppy dog ok
LYNDON B. JOHNSON: 3/10 unfortunately when you're a 6'4 old man who non-consensually pees on people as a display of dominance that takes a lot of moe points away ... he did call his own ears cute once so i cant dock too many points sighh
RICHARD NIXON: 10/10 extremely moe nobody does it like him ... the worlds most natural and refreshing aegyo . nixon show them your aegyo ... yeah see ... i rest my case
GERALD FORD: 7/10 his moeness comes from how clumsy he was but also that he has a kind of generic homer simpson middle aged man thing going on so you feel pity for him ... sort of like a hamster really. good job gerry!!
JIMMY CARTER: 6/10 the awkward smile is really good here but what makes him truly moe is that he comes from a peanut farm. unironically quite a good person too which is clearly moe because what can be cuter than building houses for those without?? exagtly
RONALD REAGAN: 1/10 the point only comes from that one plushie of him that the reagan library (or foundation i forgot) sells on its merch store . i dont care if youre an actor youre not fucking moe just because youre widely liked Go Explode !!!! hatehate hate
POPPY BUSH: 10/10 very close behind nixon . being a grown adult man named poppy is very moe but also in general i think him having feminine mannerisms brings a lot to the moe table too . this is surprising since he was director of the CIA at one point so he probably waterboarded hella people
BILL CLINTON: 5/10 despite being a sex pest i do need to admit his portrait has a cute quality to it. oomf said he has aegyosal and i do see it ... hes cuter as governor of arkansas though . not cute nowadays but also hes like 80 so i dont wanna be harsh on him there . i will be harsh on him for being a sex pest though bc thats Not moe
DUBYA BUSH: 7/10 not as moe as poppy because he's considerable more masc (nothing wrong with being masc but i wouldnt call it moe) ... he has a kind of applejack thing going on though . misspeaking is quite moe if you think about it and this guy is Known for that . imtalking about him like im trying to sell him
BARACK OBAMA: 6/10 i think his moe qualities get brought out more by michelle and biden but he does naturally have them ... i dont want obama to go grey and old nnoooooo ... be well and healthy mr obama ...
JOE BIDEN: 8/10 i feel like hes kind of cheating because old men are very pitiable and thus very moe but the ice cream thing is cute and so is having your own animal crossing new horizons island and having friendship bracelets with your president (as a VP) . MOE !!
KAMALA HARRIS: 9/10 honorary inclusion because she grew on me . i like when people draw her as the hyena fursona its very sweet ... miss kamala please be relevant again soon i miss yew ... sniffle
RICHARD NIXON is 2026's most moe president !!!!!!!! 🏆🏆🏆
HIS PRIZE: painful euthanasia
