𝒕𝒊𝒍𝒍 𝒔𝒐𝒎𝒆𝒐𝒏𝒆 𝒈𝒆𝒕𝒔

“You tell whoever you want to tell or you can let them figure it out or both. It’s really up to you, case by case. I told my family and Damian and you and then I just let the rest of the world figure me out. I’m a walking lesbian flag anyway,” she answers. She’s found over the years that she doesn’t believe in coming out for herself, but she knows everyone is different. “Yes, we can leave here. And Regina? I want you to take me home. Maybe I can teach a few other things.” She leans in, her lips a breath away from Regina’s, and smirks.

the questions continued to dance in her mind , listening and learning how to fall smoothly into the community . " i don't know if i want to tell the girls , i mean both of them wouldn't be able to keep it to themselves . they are great friends , i never treated them right , but i also know that they're not good at keeping secrets like this . " the shaking of her head thinking about karen and gretchen only made regina laugh out loud gently . " come , " bending down and pecking janis' lips with a wide smile , regina grabbed her hand and started pulling her out of the school , the confirmation that janis wanted regina to take her home was all she needed . " my mom is out of town , and you have all the time to teach me . "

And God, hearing that Regina needs her doesn’t help. Because her tone isn’t the same as when she said it before. There’s more. There's what she wanted earlier and Janis is dying to give that to her. She swallows hard, a heat wave spreading across her skin. Keep this about Regina and her journey, she reminds herself. She’ll see where that takes them later. “Where do you want to go from here?” she asks. “What do you want to do next? And I’ll help you through it.”

" i want to take you home , " she let the whisper out before she realized what janis meant by that . " scratch that , i don't know why i said that . " watch regina george begin to back track already out of fear . the ice queen was fearful for the future , a strange feeling for her to experience . " how do i do the whole coming out thing ? do i tell people or just let them find out on their own ? also , can we so get out of here ? my jeep is round back . "

PAIGE EVANS and AJ CAMPOS CRUSH (2022) dir. Sammi Cohen

“Yes,” she breathes her answer, grinning. God, why couldn’t they do this earlier? “Happy. Joyful. Content. Because no matter what happens,” her fingers toy with the neckline of Regina’s top, pulling just slightly as if they can get any closer, “no one can take this from you. This is you and fuck anyone who can’t handle that. You don’t need them anyway.”

the breath leaving her lips as janis' fingers trailed her collarbone through her shirt was automatic , limited control over what she could and couldn't do as they stood there in the school . " janis , " breathing in deeply , regina tried to slow her heart rate , calm the fight or flight response inside her . " you're the only one i need , " a repeat of an earlier comment that now meant more than needing through this journey and transition , but a need to be close , a need for guidance and for the joy felt joined with her . " where do we go from here ? " was this finally regina george relinquishing some kind of control ?

Before she can comment or even ask anything, Regina’s lips are against hers. And Janis doesn’t even think about it. Her fingers tangle into Regina’s hair, pulling her as close in as she can, tugging just slightly on gold strands. At first opening, her tongue is in Regina’s mouth. She hasn’t kissed someone in a month, since she and Grace broke up. She hasn’t kissed Regina since they were eleven and both are certainly far more talented at it now. A disappointed groan escapes her before she can stop it when they pull apart. She keeps close to the taller girl, one hand moving from her hair down to her cheek, thumb stroking at the edge of her bottom lip. “Have you ever said that out loud before?” she asks breathlessly. “That you’re gay?”

pulling apart elicited a groan out of regina , she didn't want it to stop . she finally had started to feel good when janis pulled away and she couldn't help but let her lips pout in disappointment . " never . " she whispered , smiling as her eyes stayed locked on janis . " and it feels fucking incredible to say it out loud . " she stops for a second , truly thinking about their past . " is this how you always feel ? so elated that you are yourself ? " her heart was beating quicker than ever before , anticipation sinking in her chest as she waited on every breathless word that would come from the artist in her arms .

“Fuck,” is all she manages to say at first, stepping back from Regina. Her mouth remains agape as she tries to figure out what words come next. “I– Fuck!” She places her hands on her hips, still processing it all. “Sorry. Words not working. I dunno…” She looks at Regina again and her shoulders fall at her realization. “I thought I would never want to see you again, but that’s not-“ She shakes her head, bites her lip. “That’s not true. I don’t think I’m angry at you. I think I just–“ She stops again. She’s not angry. It would be so much easier to be angry; she knows from experience. She just misses all of the things that could have been. Grieving what’s never been. Her eyes burn as she forces herself to hold back tears. No use crying. “It doesn’t matter.” She returns to right in front of Regina and grabs her face gently. She doesn’t want this to be about her right now, so she does what she’s gotten good at: deflecting. “You weren’t a terrible person when we were kids, okay? You were scared. You are going through something really hard and really important right now. You are smart and a good friend and so beautiful… and so fucking gay. And that’s nothing to be ashamed of. Got it?”

what happened next would cause a field day for north shore high . their lips crashed together , regina taking charge of the situation , the tension was high between them and regina had to cut it . the kiss was causing flashbacks of that spin the bottle game when they were kids , soft lips meshing under natural instinct . one hand cupped janis' face , the other wrapped around the shorter girls waist , her hand bunching the denim of her jacket . " and it's time that i like being gay . " she had to no longer be ashamed , and having support in her corner , having janis help her through this transition . regina no longer had fear about being out , kissing janis in the open , in the cafeteria after school hours when anyone could walk past and see them . she didn't care . right now she just wanted to enjoy kissing a beautiful girl .

Confessions spill from enchanting lips, pearls of truth that Janis is unsure what to do with. It’s all too much for her to even understand. Why would she do any of this? Why kiss her and then turn on her? And even more, was it worse that Regina had insured the outcome? It’s calculating, manipulative, but Janis knows that about her already. “Wait, I’m sorry. I’m trying to–“ She pulls back just a slight bit more, her expression giving way every puzzle piece she tries to fit together. “You wanted to kiss me? You planned the whole thing? And then you - what? - got scared? And you’ve been watching my social media? At the very least, my Instagram. You think I'm beautiful? I’m not getting it.”

" i planned wanting to kiss you , but in the moment , in front of people i changed my mind , i thought passing it off as a game would be easy . but then i saw what kind of power i got and well , " they didn't need to bring up the sizzy lez memories right now . " i abused it , and it hurt you in the process . i stopped caring because , that made it easier . but you were always in the back of my mind . and if you never want to see me after graduation , i will not blame you at all . " maybe these confessions were meant to mean goodbye . as much as regina didn't want that . " you never saw your own beauty , i always did . just took too long to tell you , and i know its too late . "

“I hope your taste in men isn’t real, because what a low bar. No offense to Aaron,” Janis teases. Wait, is she flirting? Is Regina George really flirting with her right now? A chill runs up her spine and arms. It’s not like she’s never been flirted with before, but this is different. Extremely different. The other girls weren’t her. She’s so caught up in that, she almost completely misses the confession about their kiss. “What? You… what? You wanted to?” Well, Regina George truly is full of surprises.

" shane is who the offence goes for in that respect . " why not , throw him under the bus . at the end of the day , regina was the one in front of the bus . why not take the drivers seat instead of the pavement . and that was exactly what she was doing , taking the wheel and steering it right back into the heart of someone she once trusted . once loved , maybe even still cared for on a deep romantic level . but only time would tell . " of course , you are the most beautiful creature i have ever seen , i knew it then and i know it now . " what was the point in lying anymore ? " so i made the bottle heavier with hot glue , tested how many times it spun and knew exactly where to spin it so it'd land on you . i was just the bitch who decided to turn it into a game to bully you , and i'm sorry . knowing what i know now , i would take it back in a heart beat . "

ㅤ   eyes  begin  to  narrow  at  janis,   why  did  she  assume  the  worst  from  bryce?   SHE  WAS  LITERALLY  JUST  A  GIRL.    ❝  i  just  got  out  of  practice,  ❞    she  says  flatly,   holding  her  cleats  that  were  at  her  side  up    ---    and  it  wasn't  a  complete  lie.   practice  was  had,   but  it  ended  about  half  an  hour  ago.   she'd  just  spent  a  little  extra  time  in  the  locker  room    ---    NOT  THE  POINT!   she  then  decides  to  shift  the  attention  off  of  herself  and  onto  janis,   because  she  was  just  as  confused  as  to  why  she  was  here  this  late.    ❝  did  you  just  assume  i  had  ulterior  motives?  ❞    she  cocks  her  head  to  the  side  as  she  adjusts  the  duffle  on  her  shoulder.    ❝  why  are  you  here?   and  what  led  you  to  eating  total  shit?  ❞    there's  a  pause  but  only  because  she's  now  grinning,    ❝  curiosity  will  kill  this  bryce  if  you  don't  spill.  ❞   

@bitehand

She feels Regina pull back and does the same, not out of her hold, but enough to look down and see her fully. Fingers gently slide back into blonde hair without thought, complete instinct. She chuckles at the question, disbelieving smile on her face. “Based on your compulsory taste in boys, I’m not your type. Not a jock. I’m an art freak. Not conventional in any way. I’m weird as shit for fun. I push boundaries everywhere just to see what I can bend and break. I’m outspoken, a social justice warrior. I’m not afraid to fight you, unlike your exes. Oh, and my IQ might be a little too high, since all your ex-boyfriends aren’t the brightest.” She smirks. She means every word she’s said, but there is some satisfaction in getting to tease Regina over her taste in men. “Oh, and I tried ruining your life last year. Did I miss anything?”

" you really think my type in guys is my real type ? " if janis really believed that then maybe her mask was too thick , the facade too real . regina had dated men like that because they were the hottest boy and she was the hottest girl by the student bodies standards . she knew that she had to date those guys in order to maintain her status . it was all a game for regina george , and that was the most important information for anyone to realize . " you fight what what you believe in , i wish i could be that strong . " the whisper of truth as she found her feet attempting to step even closer . " i prefer intelligence , i can actually talk to someone with a brain . someone like you . " the flirting was natural for gina . " you missed that you are a real human , i dated robots . " a chuckle as the final tear hopefully for a while fell down her cheek . " you missed our history , that you were who knew me most of all . that i didn't just kiss you at that party for a laugh , but because i wanted to . "

She so badly wants to wipe away the tears from those deep blue eyes, banish them from that beautiful face forever. Janis doesn’t realize she’s holding her breath until Regina’s face is buried in her neck again. Fuck, she’s so close. “Okay, yes, if we’re being us specific, sure, people would double take.” She can’t help the small laugh in her voice at how fucked it all is. It’s not the fact that they’re both women that would set social media on fire; it’s the fact that they’re sworn enemies. But it’s fucking high school. And that’s almost over anyway. “But fuck it, sticking with the hypothetical us of it all - not that you’d ever want to fucking date me - but why do you give a shit what the rest of this school thinks? You’re Regina George. When has anyone ever told you what you’re allowed to want? And when have you ever not fought back when they told you no?”

" but would we really care ? " she asked softly , almost testing the waters . seeing if janis would pick up on her words , pick up on what she was saying , what she meant . arms are slowly wrapping themselves tighter around janis , like a noose around the brunette's body . " i mean neither of us have ever really cared about what people think . because you're right janis , i never let anyone tell me what to do , or who to do . " she pulled back with her arms still around janis , feeling that if she let go that she would crumple more , that she would be left on the ground by herself to pick up the pieces . like janis would pay her back for every wrong deed she had done and finally get her revenge . " why would you think i wouldn't want to date you ? " fuck it

promo by @laebyrinths

Janis bites her lip to hold back even more. So it was never her fault? It was never about who she is. It was always about Regina and who she is. No matter how many times that came up in therapy, Janis could never accept it until now, until she heard it from those glossy pink lips. And suddenly, it all seems easier to forgive. Maybe she’ll feel differently when she’s out of this raw moment, but for now, she’s feeling merciful and ready to move on. “I’m not going anywhere, Regina. Okay? I’ve got you. And I’m gonna be honest, I don’t think anyone’s ever ready. You just jump and pray for the best. But nowadays, it’s sooo much easier. Holding your hand at eleven would have made me so nervous, but holding your hand now? No one would give us a second thought.”

how was she supposed to just hope for the best ? north shore was stomping ground , and she knew if this got out that the ground would swallow her whole . and it would be a hole that she could never crawl back out of . " it doesn't matter of society is easier now than it was back then , " when she pulls apart slightly , the tears were finally noticeable in her ocean eyes . they were only inches apart , very quickly was regina burying her face back into janis' neck . " i think people would take a double take if i held your hand , janis . two women , doesn't matter , but us , what would people think ? " but since when did regina care what others thought ? she just liked having the power over people , not caring about their own opinions . " sorry , i know you weren't suggesting us , just the whole lesbians being accepted more thing . "

"I didn't want to let you go," she whispers, lips brushing against hair and Regina's ear. "I only let go, because I thought you wanted me to." She squeezes her to assure that she's there now and she doesn't have to let go if Regina doesn't want her to. "You're not bringing me into anything I don't want to be part of. No one knows how to do this, Regina. We all have to find our way through. But it's easier with help and I want to help."

" i had to force you away , " that was where it all stemmed from . a force to remove someone from her life . trying to protect her very own heart . " the closer to me you were , the more real everything became and i jus- " she was so selfish , how could anyone actually like regina ? no wonder they all fear her . " i was selfish , imi'ike , " the whisper of the girls last name , " i wasn't ready . how do i be ready for all of this ? " her words caught in her throat , any regular person would be in tears by now . " don't leave me alone this time . i won't push you away again . "