Bella The Rat

If you ever think you've done stupid shit while drunk, just remember that when I was 19 at my aunty's wedding reception I got so drunk that I crawled through a barbed wire fence into the paddock next door and tried to pat a bull.

"yo can I hit your vape?" this is a kazoo you fucking nicotine addict

The opening scenes to the walking dead and 28 days later are completely identical except that the walking dead didn't have the guts to show full cock and balls.

When I was 14 I sent the guy I was dating a picture of me holding a bloody lambs heart with the caption "I'm giving you my heart" and he didn't even find it romantic.

I really truly hope there is an animal out there that has never been discovered. I hope no one has ever seen it and I hope no one ever does.

Fuck being nonchalant. I will set you on fire. I will eat your heart. I don't want mediocre love. I won’t do anything half-assed. If you want this then you want me- you want my crooked nose and my psychopathic tendencies and my affinity for alcohol and my bruised knuckles and my foul mouth and the knife I keep beside my bed and the jar I keep in the bathroom cupboard where my dad's photo sleeps and the mould on my ceiling that just won’t stay gone and the right hooks I save for back alleys and the secondhand cigarettes I smoke after I go to bed with someone I shouldn’t have. My heart is racing. Your skin is under my nails. There’s blood in mouth. I can’t tell if it’s mine or yours. 

I find it both funny and ironic that the people who give me shit for practicing witchcraft are the same people who believe in god. Like what's more rational? Paying respect to the elements the earth and the universe or the idea that there's an almighty man in the sky who loves you unconditionally but only under certain circumstances?

DELILAH BON IS FINALLY COMING TO AUSTRALIA AND I GOT VIP TICKETS IM GONNA MEET DELILAH BON HOLY FUCKING SHIT

My favourite type of guy to flirt with is guys who I can tell are searching for their Manic Pixie Dream Girl archetype coz I love watching that fantasy fade from their eyes the second I start talking.

Hey all you red pill sigma bros! Guess what! The Matrix was written by two trans women. So was V For Vendetta. The book Fight Club is based on was written by a gay man, and American Psycho was directed by a woman. Now go cry about it.