It gets a little lonely, but at least I'm alive.

     “Well, ya never know,” she said. “Ya might get it back sometime.”

"I hope I do, at least," she said, her voice still possessing a hint of sadness she was trying to hide.

"Third? I guess we're on par then," she replied. "Unless I've lost count," she added quickly, looking to a point in the distance for a moment in thought. "But I don't think I have?"

The night air transformed their breaths to tiny clouds of white, lifted goosebumps from frigid skin wherever it was exposed enough for the cold to attack. The breeze uttered its ghostly whistle through the pines and provided yet another bite, which seemed to hang in the air for moments afterwards. The metal railing felt cold and dry when Luke ran a finger along it, lost in thought, leaving the tip numb and tingly. 

Comfort was nice, when needed. Nicer, when not expected; finding comfort from a stranger he had yet to know on first-name basis for more than a few days certainly fell into that category. But it got him thinking whether or not he was mistaking it for something else.

Part of him simply wanted to disregard this—you only lived once, what did it matter  any more it was the apocalypse, after all. If there was ever a time to discard all milder inhibitions, it was now. Now was not the time to be held back, you should live life like you could die tomorrow, because you easily could.

Or perhaps it was the time to do just the opposite, be cautious, don’t trust a soul and look out only for your own survival. Both sounded appealing, but only one sounded lonely. Was it better to risk everything for the sake of not being lonely, or was it better to survive as long as you could?

She took a minute to line up all her thoughts of this evening. But without really intending to do so, her mind stretched it to everything she'd learned in the years that had gone by. She came to realize that the words she'd just said were more true than she thought. She didn't want to be alone.

She'd known it before, when she was on her own. In those days, she realized that there was nothing she regretted more than all the arguments with her brother's fiancé. She'd pushed both of them, the people she cared about, away without even being fully aware of it.

If she hadn't, then maybe they would've been closer by when the raid happened. Maybe both of them would've been here with her right now, maybe she wouldn't have been lonely for so long.

Though, this was a whole other situation still. Yes, she cared about Luke. Of course she did, they were part of the same group, they looked out for each other. But all in all, she hadn't known him for a long time at all, and there was a lot she didn't know yet, about both him and the group.

She looked from him to the couple of walkers and back. “Okay then,” she grudgingly agreed, releasing her grasp to try and support her own weight. “Just be careful, alright? And get out of here at the first sign of trouble.”

nicktwdg:

"I will… I’m like the definition of careful.”

"That's alright, I was never really the best at it either," she assured with a shrug. "Weapon of choice would be my handgun, but Carver took it from me when we arrived," she muttered sadly.

"I'm not a very good scrapper," she admitted with a shrug. That should be obvious, since she was fairly lean. "So my brother gave me his gun a while back so I could protect myself, saying I needed it more..."

"It was actually one of the last things I had from him, he gave it to me before we got separated," she explained to her, not really knowing why she was telling her all that. Why would she care?

Looking back up, she forced some sort of smile. "I hope I get it back though."

"The trick is to cooks the beans first and only add the peaches in the last five minutes of cooking. If not the peaches will go soggy and then shrivel up. It’s not very nice." She told Sophie, laughing.

The pair cooked together for a while, taking turns in stirring with a wooden spoons. They made small talk - about silly little things like books, movies and music.

"Never in my life did I think the secret to cooking peaches and beans would ever be revealed to me," she replied perkily with a smile. "Probably took a while to figure out the perfect recipe, right?"

It was nice, talking about all the small things they missed out on nowadays. Being here, in the lodge, where it was at least relatively safe, made her believe the world might actually be able to go back to the way things were. But then again, thinking back, that seemed silly. It might never happen.

"Sure thing," she replied, jumping off of the counter where she'd been sitting at the request, walking over to the appointed cabinet. Reaching up, she pulled it open and tried to find the right can.

"You did?" she asked, with a smile. "I bet she's wonderful," she joked lightheartedly, barely even realizing that statement might be inaccurate. For all she knew, it should be 'she was wonderful'.

"My wh— Oh, uh— Yeah, thanks."

He’s a little on edge today, borderline jittery. Today’s the day that could make or break his potential career with the guy he’d been basically doting on this past few weeks. Jeez, interviews really were a pain in the ass. 

"Ask the right questions, smile, handshake, find some common ground. It’ll be fun. Nothin’ to worry about." 

But it was still a little difficult to push back the image of all those horrifically embarrassing scenes from movies where every word got twisted the wrong way, a compliment to the guy’s ‘wife’ turning into an insult to his son, that kind of thing. His brittle smile sagged somewhat at the thought. It was weird being this nervous. Nerves increased performance, right? Or did they just make you blush and stammer like nobody’s business?

Luke’s hands found his pockets and he kicked the toe of his newly polished shoes against the ground while chewing his lip. He appreciated what she was saying—it was no less than what he needed to hear right now. But—

When whatever confidence he'd gained faded again, her smile went along with it. It took her a moment to reply, because what he was saying was right, there were a lot of people lining up for the position. Despite that, she still felt like none of them would deserve the job as much as the nervous wreck standing in front of her right now.

So, she smiled. "Because they'll see that this 'country boy' has potential they can't afford to let go to waste. They want new talent, Luke, because when you turn out to be a natural, which I know will happen, they want to be able to take credit for it." Softly pushing his chin up, she forced him to look her in the eye.

"Well, I’m sure Carlos will be able to patch you up, if worst comes to worst." Nick attempted to reassure her. He began walking faster, awaiting the appearance of walkers.

“Thank God for Carlos,” she replied with a halfhearted smile. She managed to limp a few more feet, before her grip on him tightened, her eyes widening. “Nick,” she whispered, pointing towards a small group of walkers a little while ahead. She wasn’t sure whether they’d seen them already when she directed her panicked eyes to meet his. “What do we do?” she hissed fearfully, hyper-aware of the fact that she couldn’t run.

Just like she misses her real family. Damn, she didn't even know what happened to her parents. After she lost her brother, she'd never felt so alone. Every so often, she would still wonder where he was, or what he was doing, but always refused to believe he was dead. If she could survive this long, so could Jordan. On top of that, he had Catherine. Even if Sophie herself didn't get along with the woman most of the time, she had to admit she knew how to handle herself in, well, situations. Yeah. He'd be safe with her, no doubt.

That guy looked like he could use some help, she realized as she watched him through the window. It was an obvious thought, but one that crossed her mind nonetheless. She had a choice to make, and she didn’t have much time. Helping him could possibly endanger herself.

Wait. What was she thinking? Was she seriously considering leaving another person to those monsters? Was she really getting that desensitized? It shouldn’t have been a choice.

That guy looked like he could use some help, she realized as she watched him through the window. It was an obvious thought, but one that crossed her mind nonetheless. She had a choice to make, and she didn’t have much time. Helping him could possibly endanger herself.

Wait. What was she thinking? Was she seriously considering leaving another person to those monsters? Was she really getting that desensitized? It shouldn’t have been a choice.

That guy looked like he could use some help, she realized as she watched him through the window. It was an obvious thought, but one that crossed her mind nonetheless. She had a choice to make, and she didn’t have much time. Helping him could possibly endanger herself.

Wait. What was she thinking? Was she seriously considering leaving another person to those monsters? Was she really getting that desensitized? It shouldn’t have been a choice.

That guy looked like he could use some help, she realized as she watched him through the window. It was an obvious thought, but one that crossed her mind nonetheless. She had a choice to make, and she didn’t have much time. Helping him could possibly endanger herself.

Wait. What was she thinking? Was she seriously considering leaving another person to those monsters? Was she really getting that desensitized? It shouldn’t have been a choice.

It was nice to have another girl in the lodge. Sure, Sarita had Rebecca and Clementine, but one was a easily-angered pregnant lady and the other was an eleven year-old. Sophie was nice, and they’d been getting along just fine.

"Sure I'll help," she replied as she got back up. It wouldn't be fair to always have Matthew and Walter cook, even though they both say they're fine with it. "I'm not that good of a chef though. But I'm not set-the-kitchen-on-fire horrible either." She might have gotten dough all over the place in her younger years, but as she got older and had no choice but make her own meals, since her nanny wouldn't always be around, she'd gotten better, bit by bit. With some tutoring, of course.

That guy looked like he could use some help, she realized as she watched him through the window. It was an obvious thought, but one that crossed her mind nonetheless. She had a choice to make, and she didn’t have much time. Helping him could possibly endanger herself.

Wait. What was she thinking? Was she seriously considering leaving another person to those monsters? Was she really getting that desensitized? It shouldn’t have been a choice.