i do backflips every single day of my life

eat a million hot dogs and no one cares, but eat ONE scorpion

i am a weapon, an instrument of removal, a tool trained by the cia in underground desert laboratories that exist only beneath full-page black sheet redactions, my subconscious overridden by arcane powercleansings of toad venoms and jungian hypnosis, to atomize the flesh of any being seen drinking a sparkling water

i hung a framed blingee logo in my den area and watched as hundreds of evil spirits were purged from my home like those old videos where they poured coke on pork chops and worms came out

otherworldly steez

on the hunt for rare cheeses and ancient trinkets

do i contribute things? no. am i interesting? also not

i have kids now but they all think bugs are cool so its chill

you will not believe these Gem Stones

name a liquid. any liquid