Life

“There are people who will enter your life that are unsure of their own souls. They will murder, rob and annihilate yours, if you let them. Sometimes who you are, happens to be a deadly reminder of who others will never be.”

“The worst feeling is when you trusted someone and they turned out to be what you least expected. I feel truly embarrassed when I give my time to people who take advantage of my trust. I feel as if I’m mentally naked and exposed. It’s a horrible feeling.”

“I’m not sure how to describe it anymore, but I know this. I’m not sad. I’m not bruised. I’m not scarred. I’m not struggling to wake up everyday. I’m not fearing what will happen next. I’m not worrying about how I should say something. I’m not worrying about how I should dress. I’m not worried about how loud I laugh. I’m not worried about how much I talk. I’m not worried about doing everything wrong. I’m not scared anymore. I’m happy, and it’s becoming my usual. Things still surprise me, they’re still foreign concepts, but I’m learning what it’s like to have someone care about you. I’m learning how it feels to mean something to someone. How it feels for someone to say “I appreciate you.” and mean it.”

“I wished I could tell you everything that is going on in my mind. But HE put fear in my heart, making me silent. So please understand that it is difficult for me to speak.”

“It’s really hard to see what an abusive relationship looks like until you’re finally out of it. You tell yourself that everyone experiences the same trials. That everyone goes to sleep crying. That everyone fights daily. You start counting the number of days you actually feel happy. And they always add up to zero. You tell yourself that you have to stick it out, because “relationships take work.” It’s not until you’ve been out of it, you realize that you were the only one doing the work. That he/she was the reason you were crying, That they were the ones yelling, while you were sitting there taking it. It’s not until you’ve taken a step back and admitted to yourself that: Yes, I was in an abusive relationship. Yes, I have a lot of work to do. You have to learn to be patient with yourself. You have to learn that relationships should never be that hard. You were not at fault. Ever. You are the victim. But there is hope. Be gentle with yourself, you will heal.”

“Where can I put everything you did to me down? I don’t want to carry it anymore.”

“Abuse is so traumatic because you offer up so much love to someone, allowing yourself to be utterly raw and vulnerable, and then watch as he takes pieces of your heart and burns it in front of you.”

“1. If they leave you all alone when you cry, LEAVE THEM 2. If they care more about partying and drugs than they do you , LEAVE THEM 3. If they slap you in the face or hit you (even if they’re just fucking playing), LEAVE THEM 3. If they break up with you or threaten to break up with you over stupid shit to try and control you, LEAVE THEM 4. If they refuse to meet your family or hang out with your friends, LEAVE THEM 5. If they insult you more than they compliment you, LEAVE THEM 6. If they are not supporting or believing in you 100%, LEAVE THEM 7. If they don’t like to kiss you, LEAVE THEM 8.You deserve to be loved and cared about. You do not deserve to be to torn down, hit, or ignored by the person you love. Stop letting toxic/abusive people hold you back. YOU DESERVE BETTER.”

“If there is anything I have learned from my entire history of being in a relationship with an abusive partner, it’s this: The abuse can end. You can heal. Things can change.”

“You do you. You can’t fight you. You’ll get more comfortable with you, The older you get. But, you’ll never be happy with you, until you are you. You do you. It took me a long time to learn this. Too long. I would have enjoyed myself a lot better for a lot longer if I’d only have realized it sooner. I’ve never been a slave to trends, but I always wanted to make an impression. Sometimes that meant I had to act like something I really wasn’t. I wasn’t smart enough. I wasn’t cute enough. I wasn’t thin enough, tough enough, funny enough, cool enough. ENOUGH. I am enough. Enough for me. It may have taken most of my life to realize it, but I am enough. And I like me now a lot more. I think you have to accept what you are, to become what you can. Until you do, you are bound by what you fear other people think. And the big secret is, most of them don’t care because they are thinking the same thing. Don’t be tied to what you thought. Characters aren’t made by being invisible. You do you. You can’t fight you. You’ll get more comfortable with you, The older you get. But, you’ll never be happy with you, until you are you. You do you.”

despite controversy, you are supposed to keep going. you are supposed to keep growing. you are supposed to evolve. you are supposed to leave the past behind you and keep moving forward. you should always be eager to break away from the roots that hold you back - so you can plant seeds elsewhere. plant yourself everywhere. blossom.. the way you’re meant to. the way you deserve to. you won’t regret it.