fur sure

johnny cash's little brother jimmy pennies is 3 inches tall and has a voice only dogs can hear

let's make a stone statue and beat it with chains

sponge bob square pants!

relationships and jobs are temporary. your shitty unpopular tumblr blog is forever

This on bootyshorts would go crazy

mice are having sex in my walls :(

never thought i'd get accused of faking having a mice infestation for tumblr clout and yet here we are

you fucked those mice yourself

I fucked those mice myself

imagine you have a coworker at the old spaghetti factory and then a year later they're a torchbearer at the olympics

How's the dental?

you can have all the teeth you can carry

There are a lot of reasons to oppose monarchy but one of the most overlooked is that the king is always getting stuck in some kind of hazardous puzzle chamber filling up with gravel or lava or something. Do your fucking job man