Sarducks

Usually things feel like they are falling apart but there is this girl that holds my heart. I know she isn't mine to claim but fuck, I love the sound of her name. Every call I get from her makes my problems seem like a blur. The sparkle in her eyes when they smile makes me wish my heart had a dial.

If I had to talk in all reality I have been happy before, I have been "in love"; but this is the first time I feel like someone is actually seeing me. People "look" at me all the time but she listens to my words even when I don't have much to say.

She is so supportive and strong. She has amazing kiddos. Even when she is sick she is there for her kids everyday trying to give them the life she didn't have and that's fucking beautiful. You can tell how amazing she is to the kids because of the way they treat her back. It melts my heart that a family can actually be together like that. When she smiles when she is dancing around with her kids is literally the best thing I have ever seen. It's fucking beautiful.

She is so creative! Her music talent and art creativity blows me away. She literally fills my life with color and made me start singing again. I hated my voice after my bad flu season a couple years ago. I felt like my voice never became the same but she fucking boosts me up dude! She makes me feel like I can be good! Just thinking about it even tears me up because that means a lot to me when someone brings back certain music to your life. You start remembering songs you used to love but weren't allowed to listen to while with your ex.

She reminds me of everything I used to love and make me feel like myself again. Like I didn't have to feel ashamed anymore, I could just be my weird, goofy self and she's fucking cheering me on, joining in on the weirdness!

She has changed my life this past year I have known her and I am so greatful to have met her. Even if I'm not blessed to call her mine one day I am happy to get to know her beautiful soul.