the mutuals are getting mythological about the trials of modern life tonight on tumblr dot com
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@saratza
the mutuals are getting mythological about the trials of modern life tonight on tumblr dot com

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At the annual Houston RenFest we’d always get one or two furries that walk around and every time the general reaction from the medieval roleplayers is akin to “BEASTS? BEASTS THAT WALK LIKE MAN? FOUL!”
Last time I went a furry volunteered for an impromptu conversion/exorcism and a guy dressed as a monk gathered a bunch of people and using a Gatorade bottle performed an entire catholic christening while reading off the instructions on his Ipad. When the furry was fully “converted” he removed the head of his costume and everyone in the crowd pretended to freak out and say shit like “GlORY BE HE IS SAVED” “CHRIST HAS BROKEN HIS CURSE”
That’s the best crap i’ve heard in months
have I mentioned that i’m fucking in love with humankind
Back in 2015 or so, I went to a faire that was taking place near one of those “frozen in time” Victorian-era reenactment villages - the ones with bakeries, a blacksmith, farm animals and the like.
The actors from the village took great delight in showing up at the joust, dressed in 1890s clothing and declaring themselves to be time travellers “from the future, the far-off year of 1892!”
"Tattoos are becoming unpopular", "piercings are unpopular again", "keep your hair natural never dye it again, it's the trend now" literally fuck off I know what y'all are doing
So the thing is boobs really do be jiggling. If having breasts has taught me anything it is that the ladies frolic. I don't even have that large of boobs but every time I go down some stairs all I can think about is that stupid quote about boobing breastily down the stairs or whatever it is because God Damn.
But anime and video game boob jiggling is like. The most uncanny valley shit I've ever seen nine times out of ten. You would think people this horny about tits would have actually looked at some but I guess not.
What we really need is some pervert to compile the ultimate visual guide to boob bouncing physics that's just like 500 hours of meticulously organized videos of breasts of different size and shape and under different fabrics bouncing around from a wide variety of physical movements so horny game devs can finally get it right and I don't have to be creeped out by women who appear to have surgically implanted softballs in their chest under skin made of rubber bands.

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Now that everyone is discussing Nolan's Odyssey movie, I feel like it's a good time to let non-Italians know that the production dumped plastic props into the Italian sea. Weirdly enough I could not find any article in English about it but it's a fucking problem nonetheless.
I might translate this article later today. This one was the most complete one, even in Italian news it's not talked about that much.
Non è la prima volta che la produzione solleva un vespaio in Sicilia. A Lipari una squadra di sub sarebbe però già impegnata a bonificare i
They dumped plastic skeletons in environmentally protected areas, against the literal contracts they had to sign to get the permits to film in environmentally protected areas. Like they not only did a bad ecological thing that freaked out some divers, they literally broke environmental protection laws and their contract with the Italian government
girl she's dead what do you want them to do. hang the corpse
too lazy to retype this but . insane interaction w coworker last night
tell me you have never worked in customer service without telling me you've never worked in customer service
customer facing worker faces customers politely more at ten
there may have been a psychopath at that place of business that day but it wasn't op
asked one of my coworkers how she's doing today and she goes "could be better, could be worse," and another coworker nearby who was eavesdropping chimes in with "could be a lil bit o' alligator curse!" i have no idea what he meant by that but i do know that it has been immediately added to the lexicon.
on the one hand encountering a character in fiction that reminds you of some people you have had unpleasant experiences with in real life is extremely regular. on the other hand it is vital to understand when this is colouring your takes on a character rather than actual analysis of the text before you

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listening to a song you've already heard 100000 times but this time you notice backing vocals you never heard before
stop calling it a girl dinner and call it by its formal name: Fend For Yourself dinner in an ingredients household
I got my fauxhawk redone today. Got the back and sides faded again. And there was this little 90yo lady in the salon getting her hair washed and she was watching the process.
I knew she was 90 because she had been telling everyone who would listen that she’d just turned 90 and commenting on what everyone was wearing and whether she liked it or not. Just generally zero filter
Anyway, my stylist finished putting some more texture into my faux hawk and I was very aware of this woman watching me in the mirror, frowning like she wasn’t sure if she approved. But when it was time for me to stand up and leave she reached out a paper-thin hand to me and said, “I have to tell you, you have perfect eyebrows for that haircut. Your whole face just—“ and she made an expressive gesture with her hands, the bangles on her arms jangling like a wind chime. “You look so much better than when you came in.”
Which. Lol. Thank you? I guess?
Anyway. There is no more hair on my neck and I am less evil as a result. Success.
What's the most fascinating to me about the replies on my old-man-maga-ice-hat post is the people who genuinely think the interaction didn't happen because the man in question ostensibly shares their political beliefs and nobody - NOBODY - who shares their hideous bigoted beliefs could possibly behave badly in a public setting. I guess I should have anticipated that reaction from the stupid sheep who jerk it to the politics tag on Tumblr.com
Thanks to all the retail/food industry workers/alumni who have reading comprehension skills and have touched grass recently <3 Glad to have you on my blog!
This is true but I'm gonna be controversial for a second and say that I feel bad for jocks who get hit with The Injury™️too. The Injury™️ fucking sucks, man. Having something that everyone praised you for when you were young suddenly betray you and having to grapple with both a sudden loss of ability (whether it's something that can be recovered from or not) and figure out what your future looks like now that the one you had imagined for yourself (whether it was actually realistic or not) feels like it's been snatched away is brutal.
Yeah, like, maybe we shouldn't be shaming/making fun of people for either of these things!

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What would a Yankee Candle go for in ancient Greece?
tbh the most confusing thing about it to them would probably be the glass that the candle is contained in. They might try to buy information about glass from you.
Yeah basically
Yeah I should’ve clarified (pun intended). They had glass in the ancient world especially in Rome and Egypt but it was basically super heated sand and color additives put in a mold and often looked opaque and kinda lumpy. Even if it was blown like it was in some regions it wouldn’t have looked like modern glass.
Clear blown glass like you’d see a modern scented candle contained in wasn’t invented until the late Middle Ages and certainly wasn’t mass produced until the 1500s and even then places like Venice that had knowledge of these techniques literally forbid their glassmakers from leaving their city or region so other people couldn’t make it, forcing artificial scarcity and making it a very expensive material.
So if you showed a yankee candle to an Ancient Greek, especially one from a city or something, they’d be like burning scented wax okay not something I’d do but it makes sense. Also how the fuck is that glass transparent.
Like imagine if someone brought you something weird but understandable contained in a material that they said was made out of wood and you could tell that it’s clearly made out of wood they’re not lying about that but it was also completely transparent and see through with no visible flaws. That’s about the level of weird we’re talking about here.
It isnt flawless, but transparent wood does already exist actually
What the fuck I feel like a medieval peasant seeing an iPhone
Who goes there
A 75 yo man proudly came into the cafe wearing an Ultra Maga hat. I excused my barista from the register to handle the transaction.
"The hat is customizable," he said, struggling with the velcro patch on the front. "If I need it, I have an ICE one too. I pick based off the business i walk into."
"Customizable is an important hat descriptor," I said. "what can I get you?"
"You wouldn't believe how offended people get these days," he said. "And I'm supposed to do something about it if you're offended? You chose to be offended!"
"We all have hundreds of thousands of decisions everyday," I said. I thickened my accent. "That's what my stepdad always said. But I can make one easier - we have a delicious Ethiopian roast available."
"Like if I told you you have a bull ring," he said, "because bulls have rings in their noses. Is that offensive?"
I laughed. "I've heard that before."
"It's a joke, but people get offended. Maybe you're offended."
I looked at him. I smiled. "You aren't trying to offend me though, right?"
Of course he was. I was being friendly and the friendlier I was, the faster he switched topics. He was saying anything inflammatory he could think of to see if I'd take the bait. After about 20 minutes of my redirecting and deescalating, he settled into a more normal interaction. He took up too much of my time showing me a product I'd feigned mild interest in to get him to stop talking about getting accused of inappropriate behavior at work. When we finally disengaged, he spent 10 minutes trying to catch my eye again. When he failed, he left.
There's this new breed of customer who insists on trying to incite political conversation through their clothing and, when that doesnt work, their snide little comments. If I owned my own business, maybe I would have given the guy the fight he wanted. But I work for a corporation and I love paying my bills so I deescalated.
Anyone wearing that type of shit and preying on workers for their own spank bank material is a brainless fucking sheep.
something i want to mention because i’ve seen it growing as a trend online is that not only do people do this just for their own gratification, but watch for glasses. smart glasses are a growing segment of the consumer market, and creeps like this are harassing people in public in order to gather content without the victims being aware they’re being filmed
good job on how you handled it, op!
Indeed, spotting Meta glasses in the wild just got harder in 2026.
They are no longer exclusively Ray-Bans.