32 flavors and then some.

I woke up today and felt different.

I knew something had stopped and another

had begun in the night.

I go to sleep and wake up thinking of

your face and your hand in mine.

The ache in my chest is tangible,

I could reach into my own body and hold my

heart to soothe it until you’re here.

But the ache makes me feel alive,

like I’m still worthy of tenderness and softness.

The same things you tell me are the things I

long for from you.

My lips on yours.

Your hand in mine.

Sharing the same air.

Our bodies twisting and our laughs filling the

space between our skin.

I’ve longed for love like this.

Is this what people mean when they say happy

I want to feel her body against mine,

Press my mouth to her skin;

Breathe her in.

I want her to touch my neck,

Hold my head in her hands

And whisper that I’m safe.

And I can whisper back, that with her

I feel safer than I ever have;

And I’m never going to let go.

I want to feel her smile against my skin

And I want her to touch me,

Running one hand down my back,

And letting the other rest on my leg

While I play with her hair.

I’ll look into her eyes,

And know that I’ll never stop trusting her.

But I also know

She could do whatever she wanted,

And I would stay down on my knees,

And thank her for it.

She could rip my heart into shreds -

I would pick up the bloody pieces

And tell myself it was worth it,

Just to be close to her.

every single poem i've ever read

about wanting to be loved

so desperately

that it feels like something is

trying to claw its way out of you.

smile again for me, my love.

i will get used to the taste of blood.

i’m whispering your name again like a prayer

 into the blurring mist of early morning. 

    do you feel the way my heart tugs on yours?

the way it drifts through the passersby that mark the streets with their footfalls, 

crossing the haze of high beams into the cavern of your chest?

i dream in your mother tongue,

the words coating the back of my throat like honey. 

do you ever think of me in these quiet moments? 

does the thought of 

my hips //

        my waist // 

                the plunge of my collarbone

tear you to shreds the same way i crumble under your gaze?

Anything at all -

To have her look at me like that;

To feel her pressed up against me,

To breathe her in as if I’m drowning,

Gasping for air.

I want to tell her I love her,

Then put my mouth against her neck

And show her what that love feels like;

Proving it to her.

She means the world to me,

And I would give the world to have her.

I would die today,

If it meant I could die in her arms.

Her lips against mine,

Saying she loves me

As it all fades away.