under the sun

apollo: pfttttt i'm not jealous

jo: maybe i'll just give connie a call and blow him instead

"i don't know if you fucking him is better or worse. god i'm getting jealous again. i just don't like anyone else touching my sammy. i guess you could say it's my imagination again. how'd it start? were you the one that initiated things that night you fucked him? how's that possible? me making you laugh and smile while still being an asshole? i'll give you some kisses but you gotta give me a minute to get over my jealousy. i can totally do a few sleepovers."

"well no one else is going to be touching your sammy. i like that you know, being your sammy. well we were both pretty drunk, but yeah i kissed him. think i only fucked him because i didn't want anyone fucking me that wasn't you. you really wanna know about this? maybe it's because i've known you for so long, lets me smile more. we've never really had time to just be together, so i think it'll be fun."

apollo: oh but you loveeeee spending time with that best friend of yours

jo: careful you sound jealous

"you really don't have to apologize, sam. i get why you did it. but fuck did i hate knowing that alex had you in a way only meant for me. and i know, you could say the same about callum and i. but it's different. i feel like you had an emotional connection with alex whereas it was legit just sex with callum to me. am i making sense? probably not. they're not wrong you know, you shouldn't have anything to do with me. i've been nothing but an asshole to you lately, sammy. i know i didn't show it back then but i did care. i think i'm still hard to read sometimes. can we still like kiss and stuff? even though we're gonna take things slow?"

"i mean technically no one else has fucked me, but i get what you mean. you think i have an emotional connection with alex? is this your imagination going again? connie, he's just a friend. the group of friends i have with noah, we're all ex-conversion guys and girls. we all went out that night and yeah, we ended up sleeping together. nothing emotional about it. yeah you've been an asshole to me lately but you've also made me smile and laugh a lot lately too. i'm gonna require a lot of kisses and other stuff, even though we're going slow. maybe a few sleepovers here and there."

apollo: just tolerable?

jo: don't like spending time with a lot of people

Rhaenyra and her boys ⋆ og

apollo: fuck no

jo: i find you tolerable

"you don't say? josiah almost killed me! i'm apologizing because i've hurt you for being the way i am, for being an idiot who lets his own imagination run wild. i've hurt you like twice now and you didn't deserve that shit. yeah, you're not the only person who's told me that. okay, i can be honest. you did all of that to get a reaction out of me? sammy, i was going fucking crazy. seeing you post alex like that pissed me the fuck off. i felt i had no right to react though, plus i thought you wanted nothing to do with me after that whole callum shit. but believe me, i cared. about you and that whole alex situation. i don't know, what do you want us to do? take things slow? jump right into a relationship?

"i tend to do stupid things to get a reaction out of you, i'm not proud of it. i didn't like seeing you post calvin or whatever his name is so i reacted. i'm sorry for that, connie. i mean i'm sure plenty of people would probably say i shouldn't have anything to do with you. that's the easier choice, but i've never cared about if something was easy or not. i remember being at church once, and just wondering if you cared or not. i mean i had a feeling but sometimes you were so hard to read. i don't think a relationship is right for us, at least right now. taking things slow sounds nice, i think. i mean we spent a long time apart, what if like we have to get to know the new versions of us."

apollo: you might be

jo: you say that to everyone?

"i accidentally called him sam and he got really mad at me for that. i don't wanna fight with you either. i'm sorry for the way that i am, sammy. i need to stop letting my imagination run wild. i didn't want to admit it, or more like i wouldn't let myself but i've also loved you since then. no one has ever made me feel the way that you do, sam. i definitely haven't set foot in a booth since then either. especially not with anyone else. you're the only person i want, despite my actions saying otherwise. but sammy, it's you. you're the one occupying all my thoughts. it's always been you. i was just too chickenshit to admit it."

"wait, really? that's a little embarrassing but i mean it's jo. he won't hold it against you. why are you apologizing for how you are? don't ever do that, connie. you being who you are is part of the reason i was so drawn to you when we were younger. but you really do need to reign in the imagination because i bet a hundred percent of the time it's not true. i know that we probably have a lot to talk about and work on. but i think we both just have to start being honest with each other. that's the only way this is gonna work. i'm sorry for posting alex, i knew you would be angry. and yeah maybe i wanted to get a reaction out of you. to see if you....cared, which i know sounds silly. so what do we do now?"

apollo: i don't normally beg

jo: so i'm special then?

apollo: need me to buy rubbers or do you have some?

jo: i have some

"do whatever you wanna do, sam. i can't control you. if you wanna let noah fuck then be my guest. let me be clear though, i fucked jo once and that was it. won't do it again. not like that makes any of this better."

"i'm not even surprised, i mean it's you two. i want to not fight with you anymore, connie. i want to know that whatever this is, that it's safe from reactionary emotions. you get a thought in your head and run away with it and you run to somewhere i can't find you. i've loved you since i was sixteen, loved you silently while you went through trauma i couldn't save you from. i haven't stepped into a photobooth since that summer before i was sent away. cause it never felt right, that was our thing. a little piece of heaven that was just for us. i don't want alex or noah, or any other fucking loser around here. just you."

apollo: why? wanna come?

jo: show me what you got big boy

"okay sam. i'm sorry."

"should i let noah fuck me then? since that's what we're doing here. best friends just fucking each other."

apollo: well hit my line whenever you decide that you're down

jo: what are you doing rn?

"it was jo."

"you're actually such a hypocrite it's not even funny."