Reblog if I can jump into an RP with you via Ask
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
almost home
TMBGareOK. The Official They Might Be Giants tumblr
Fai_Ryy
Misplaced Lens Cap

bliss lane
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
occasionally subtle

shark vs the universe
KIROKAZE
The Stonewall Inn
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
One Nice Bug Per Day

izzy's playlists!
Monterey Bay Aquarium
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
Cosmic Funnies
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
taylor price
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@sanctusmonstra
Reblog if I can jump into an RP with you via Ask

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[Text to - Auric] Holy fucking shit. Take a hint, Asshole.
[Reply] The only things I take from women are sexual favors, cooking and advice for kids and pets. You supply none of those, so fuck your hint!
more texts for you bitches
ANGSTY TEXTS, BITCH
[text] You should have told me you wanted me out of your life. [text] I should have never let you back into my life. [text] Okay [muse’s name] what’s the deal, pretty sure this is you…listen if you want me to leave you alone, please just tell that. [text] Please don’t walk away. [text] Please don’t do this. [text] When are you going to realize I want nothing to do with you? [text] You want nothing to do with me, I get it. [text] I’m an idiot. You fooled me again. [text] When I think things are about to change … I’m always proven wrong. [text] I just want you to be happy. And you’ll be happier without me. [text] I just hate that someone could make me trust [him/her/them] the way that I did [text] The truth is I’m not over you. [text] The truth is I never really wanted to be with you. [text] I’m seeing someone else. [text] How the hell did you get my number, stalker? [text] You’re so selfish. [text] I just saw you leave with [her/him/them]. [text] FUCK YOU AND YOUR DUMB CUTE FACE
LOVING TEXTS, BITCH
[text] Did I tell you today that you’re the most adorable? Cause, yeah. [text] Be careful. [text] I’m only saying it because I love you. [text] I’m only saying it because I care about you. [text] Okay, I’m bringing coffee. [text] I’m thinking dinner and a movie later this week? [text] Let me take you out, please? [text] Let me make you dinner tonight. [text] I want you to be happy. [text] You’re always safe with me. [text] I can’t stop thinking about you. [text] I seriously don’t know what I’d do without you. [text] I know you may not feel like you are, but you are loved. And important. Please don’t forget that. [text] It was so good seeing you. [text] You don’t need this shit. [text] I’ll be there in five minutes. [text] Let me help, please? [text] You’re important to me. [text] Stop falling asleep in the bathtub. You’re going to drown and die and leave me and I’m not having that. [text] I would gladly watch Netflix and eat Thai with you any day. [text] I’d give up my phone charger AND the last piece of gum for you. That’s love. [text] Hey beautiful no judgment but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
ANGRY TEXTS, BITCH
[text] If you don’t want me to bust your window, I suggest you answer the phone. Now. [text] To quote Mean Girls, you’re a fugly slut. [text] Are you SERIOUSLY bringing that up right now!? [text] Lose my number, asshole. [text] You’re so predictable and obnoxious. And it’s not only me who thinks so. [text] …The least you could do is answer, wtf. [text] You’re a piece of shit human being and an even worse friend. [text] This is YOUR FAULT. And you can’t even pretend like it isn’t, because you know it is. [text] Why couldn’t you just stay out of it? [text] Holy fucking shit, take a hint, asshole. [text] Go fuck yourself. [text] What the fucking hell is wrong with you? [text] You can take your stuff back as long as I don’t light it on fire first. [text] I have cramps and a migraine so you do NOT want to mess with me right now [text] Bye and have a very fuck you day
SEXY TEXTS, BITCH
[text] Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this. [text] Why are you so hot…like honestly, it’s not fair. [text] Yeah, you looked good in your [dress/shirt/pants] last night but really, they looked way better on my floor. [text] Come over. With condoms. [text] You should come over, clothing optional. [text] I feel like a nasty slut and I LOVE IT [text] Sorry I got drunk and texted you about my sex life [text] Sex on a rooftop - trashy or adventurous? [text] If you’re not at my apartment, shirtless, in five minutes, I will be personally offended. [text] I don’t think he likes that I’m always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together [text] It’ll be like The Notebook, except with way more of my penis. [text] I didn’t know that all of his brothers would be hot and musically inclined, too. That’s a dick move on behalf of biology. [text] I DON’T WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH. [text] So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking? [text] I just need some of your time and all of your body. [text] I am available for nakedness [text] I think about [him/her/them] when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
DRUNK TEXTS, BITCH
[drunk text] So wat are you really over me no w [drunk text] AND I UNFOLLOWED YOU ON INSTAGRAM TOO, BITCH [drunk text] You are my queen and my savior and I love you forever [drunk text] You are the most beautiful girl I have ever known [drunk text] I’m eating macaroni and cheese on a slice of pizza and autocorrect just wrote that text for me pretty much, what’s your night like [drunk text] Listen up slut, you’re one hot piece of ass and if [he/she/they] doesn’t realize it, it’s their loss [drunk text] but what’s the point of a Disney sing off party if you’re not here. You have to be be the Pumbaa to my Timon [drunk text] Can you pls remind me tomorrow of how much of a fool I made myself tonight [drunk text] FUCK YOU YOU’RE GORGEOUS [drunk text] I think maybe you and me should like go out and eat pizza or something check yes or no [drunk text] Please don’t hate me I’m too tired and too dizzy to be hated [drunk text] I hate (him/her) but less when I’m drinking. Thanks, alcohol. [drunk text] Omf g you need to get over here now I think I’m dyin [drunk text] SWEEEEEEEET CAROLINE
"Be careful what you wish for."
James gave the red headed woman a wicked grin at those words.
"What I wish for has and always be you. You, a few kids, and nice compound full of dangerous animals and automatic weapons and a really good library. "
He kissed her hard. "Been that way since you saved me so long ago."
The Devil and the Deep Blue Sea 7/???
James woke up slowly and hazily. It was a good haze. The warm feeling of a long rest mixed with the pleasant drain of the adrenal highs and a entire day and night of revelry. He had to stretch gently to keep from disturbing Athena and Hannah. He slipped gently out from under Hannah’s arm and the soft silken sheets of the wonderfully large bed. Once on his feet he shook himself like a lion with a wet mane to knock off the rest of the sleep.
It was in the middle of emptying his bladder that he heard a sound that was both familiar and frightening outside of his own control. The harsh clacking sound of a loading shotgun.
James was out the door of the attached restroom and had his pistol and knife in hand in an instant. Barrel up and ready for destruction, he slipped out of the bedroom and into the hall.
The scene he came upon was much as he had left it the night before, partiers were spread about, mostly female and mostly undressed at this point, all passed out from revels and over indulgence. Auric stood stark naked, much like James himself, with James shotgun lined up and primed on the hotel room door.
James barrel adjusted to the door, but his body language clearly asked what was up. Auric kept the shotgun trained on the door with his right hand, but his left hand signaled to James.
A tap of his ear. Two fingers wiggling pointed down. A flash of five fingers twice. His hand wobbled then flashed three sets of five.
“I heard footsteps outside 10 to 15 people.” the signal said.
James nodded, he would have been on edge as well with that much activity outside of the door. this was the only suite on this side of the upper floor, and the hotel staff wouldn’t send a entire squad of people to do simple room cleaning.
James was about to signal back when the bathroom door opened and out walked a bleary eyed Araris, he scratched himself with a long yawn, wearing a pair of Nightmare Before Christmas pajama pants and his pistols and knives. He blinked at them for a moment, weapons out and covering the door, before he gave a small grunt, a short annoyed sound, and silently pulled his 1911′s into each hand. He didn’t point both weapons at the door, but sat ready and watching with a look of thorough aggravation.
The knock on the door was gentle, a respectful but forceful three rappings against the door in a even beat. the voice that came through was a smooth tenor. The kind of voice that almost slithers into your ear and curls up to rattle. “I’m sorry to interrupt your party Mr. Heliotrope, but I do have such a pressing business to attend to with you, and I simply cannot have your great uncle waiting. So do be a good sport and come along with us, so that we don’t have to bother your friends. I wouldn’t want anything to happen to them is this meeting was to become unpleasant.” the human viper behind the door hissed like Kaa telling the apes of the jungle to walk into his mouth.
James knew the voice all to well, and it sent the hair on the back of his neck to standing. It was the same voice that calmly told him that he was going to be taken to a hidden temple and sacrificed to Hades.
James gave a rumbling growl before responding. "Last time mine and yours had an unpleasent encounter, they buried a lot more of yours than mine, and I had nothing but my bare hands. You cross that threshold and my Uncle's kingdom will be waiting a lot sooner than any of you planned."
"Ah, yes... That was a most unfortunate set of circumstances that you could not be persuaded to go along. I was hoping that we could avoid such issues a second time. You see its such bad form to create a calamity in the midst of a fine establishment, but It seems you leave me no choice Mr.Heliotrope."
James ice blue eyes burned with rage as the man entoned the words, tracking the sound of the voice theough the wall and contemplating taking a few shots through the smooth, dark wood. His togue lashed back as soon as the voice halted.
"Fuck you old man." The Georgia drawl in him leaking out slightly more with the spat response.
"Any time you want to save a scene from forming, you can step in here and take me away yourself instead of sending brainwashed goons to die."
James practically looked frozen with icy hate, colder than the depths of hell in his unblinking gaze at the door.
"You've my open invitation to step in here and face me in fair combat."

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Gods and Deities Sentence Starters
“And what are you the god of? Bad tastes?”
“You’re not my god.”
“It’s been a long time since anyone invoked my name.”
“I’m a god, not a genie. I do not ‘grant’ wishes.”
“You haven’t an inkling of an idea of what you’ve just done, haven’t you?”
“And what is a mere mortal to a god?”
“A god is only as powerful as their believers.”
“When’s the last time anyone prayed to you?”
“Don’t be stupid. Gods don’t exist.”
“Your petty discourse is highly amusing.”
“What a cute little shrine! I wonder who’s it to?”
“Your title may have “Evil” in it but you just look sad.”
“No one’s ever built me a shrine before…”
“You mustn’t be a very good god then.”
“Your mortal woes are beneath me.”
“You dare speak to me in such a tone?”
“Be careful of what you wish for.”
“You don’t know the meaning of “God-King”.
“You know not of who you speak to, do you?”
“You don’t look very… godly… to me.”
“’A god’? Don’t be so full of yourself.”
“What are you the god of?”
“Does it get lonely?”
“Oh god, please don’t hurt me!”
“Your god has no sway here.”
“And what brings you into my domain, little one?”
“I think I just woke something up. Something powerful.”
“Um… hello? Any… anyone listening?”
“This is stupid. Of course no god will listen to me.”
“You probably look nothing like your statue.”
“I hope this shrine is worthy enough for you…”
“I’m here as a sacrifice, as promised by my people.”
✨+ add your own!
Valentine's 2019
James, despite the fact that he always swore if he was UP at 6am, someone was dying. Was in the shower promptly at 6:05 to be ready for Nat to come in from her run at 7. He wasnt dressed to the 9's, but had changed into his version of dressed up. No missions today, no training, no trips to the range. He slid his leather jacket on and stood with water and hot tea ready at the door until his red headed half goddess came in.
"Hey," he said to her, pausing the sweep her up in a deep kiss, lifting her to him, ignoring the sweat, honestly enjoying it in a way.
"Go get ready, wear something you will be happy walking in. You need a new formal outfit, swimsuit, and lingerie to match of course." He stole another kiss. "If you desire then we can get matching dress for me as well, and hit any accessory stores, but we need to be ready for dinner at 7."
super extra naughty indecent dirty raunchfest the meme
❤ : Where on their body is your muse most sensitive? ✿ : Has your muse ever had sex before? ☜ : Does your muse like to top? ☞ : Does your muse like to bottom? ∀ : Your muse’s favorite position? ☺ : How often does your muse masturbate? ☂ : How long does it take your muse to hit climax, usually? ✌ : Is your muse good with their hands? ♡ : Does your muse have any birthmarks or scars they get embarrassed about others seeing? Á : Is your muse loud in bed? ⚔ : Does your muse have any specific kinks? ☯ : If you’re comfortable with it, write a drabble about our muses doing something naughty. If not, put a strikethrough across this one in your reblog (or simply don’t do it; your blog, your rules ;3). ☌ : Would/does your muse have any special piercings anywhere? Would they get some? ♥ : Does your muse like to cuddle after sex? Anything else for aftercare?
Auric looked over the roomate ad for a moment and shrugged, he had stayed in smaller places and the writer of the ad seemed to have they're shit togther. He'll he only needed the place for about a year until his new house was built, and he could use a local guide. If the housemates could get along with Blitz, then it would at least be a place to bang broads and crash. He whipped out his phone. "Hey, My names Auric, I saw the roomate ad and was interested. Is Natalie there?"
Natalie held the phone between her cheek and her shoulder as she listened to the man on the other end, listening quietly – and, of course, judging. Always, judging.
“Speaking,” she replied, as she lifted a small vial of electric blue liquid, swirling it around inside the glass. “Auric, is it? The room is still available, if that’s what you’ve called to ask – but before anything else, I’ll have to meet you first. I’m not about to let complete strangers in…” She paused, just long enough to pour the contents of the vial into the mixing bowl in front of her, blinking quickly to avoid staring at the bright flash of light that emitted out of it.
“Are you free on Thursday night? How about you meet me down at Nitro, that bar on Seamus street. We can talk, and maybe I’ll bring you back to see the place. You know – once I make sure you aren’t the sort to make lamps out of people’s skin.”
Auric gave a chuckle at that partucular serial killer reference, but his response was deadpan. "Ed Gein lacked class, Lamps are so . Everyone knows the skin of your victims is for book bindings and riding boots." He paused long enough to let the comment settle. "I'm more of a Edmond Dantes than Jack the Ripper." He clicked his tongue and checked his watch.
"Skin fetishes aside Nitro on thursday will be fine."
"Anything in particular I should know before then? Any deal breakers aside from corpse lights? I'm fond of skull drinking glasses and I don't want you to miss out."
I am your monster and I will protect you.

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B, E, F H, K -- for all the boys
Body Part-
James: James like most men of his stature, grew up chunky and “the fat kid” about 12 is when he really started to transform from a chunky baby panda to the pantherish build he carries now, who while James is immensely proud of his strength, his bodies looks never got complimented very much and so his attitude can more be described as body neutral than body positive. That said when James did finally impress a young woman and take her to bed, she had nothing but praises for his manhood matching his increased bulk. So James most prideful part is his well, most prideful part. Not so much because of some inflated ego but because it's the only thing that every woman he's been with never complained about or insulted.
As far as on the opposite sex, James is pretty much 50/50 on the Breast vs Ass debate, and honestly a much better favorite part would be a woman's hips, as James has to feel comfortable that she's built solid enough to handle James getting rough. If her hips a wide and solid and make her hourglass in shape, then she could be anywhere between 100 and 200 pounds and James would still measure her attractiveness as something to consider.
Auric: Auric in totally different experience to James was always the pretty boy. Granted his taste has always been more gothic than prep, he never suffered the same mockery as James for his physical build. Auric would tell you that he is as much a Greek God as his mother, but he is most proud of his hands as they are what woos women, deals death, amd makes his music.
On the opposite sex Auric is 100% a Boobs man plain and simple. He can appreciate women well built in other ways, but a woman with a solid front is top of his list.
Araris: Araris had a atypical upbringing, being raised from a young age as a assassin and bodyguard, a catch all elite killer, every child was built to physical perfection or they were sent home or died, so while Araris is extremely well built and conditioned, he feels that his best and favorite part of himself is his emerald green eyes.
On a woman Araris is 100% an ass man, attracted to women who care for themselves with exercise and athletics, building up a shapely back end.
Experience-
James: Sexual experience is an odd thing, James of the three, is probably the one with the least number of varied sexual partners, but has had several longer lasting committed relationships. Catarina, Athena, Suka, and Natalie all being relationships that lasted for a year or more. James has a deft hand making a total experience of sex, making it a “scene” even when not participating in BDSM. James is knowledgeable of the female body, considerate, and caring in bed. If James has a weakness in his knowledge or game, it's that a personal connection
Auric: Auric may not have bedded a woman from every country in the world, but he has damn well made the attempt to. Using his family fortune to hop around the world from New York to Beijing Auric did his best to not spend a night without a female companion. Auric has a “Body Count” that's probably somewhere over 100. Auric is savage to a fault in bed, and with the right woman could be caring, but sleeping with him is more of being mauled than pleasured. He really needs another borderline sociopath to fall in ruthless and calculated love with. He tends to attract woman looking for the savage man, so its not normally a complaint, but even the most gorgeous of model or minor celebrity will only make it a few nights in his companionship.
Araris: Araris is probably the least experienced of the triumvirate. He had a very different high school experience and has a hard time emotionally investing in anyone even though he is deeply desiring a companion. In school to be a Mechanic, couplings were quick, carnal affairs all about satisfying needs and urges and nothing more. He tends to overanalyze the opposite sex past a casual affair. He is a capable lover in physical aspects, but sleeping with him is generally a cold flame.
Favorite Position-
James: if oral sex counts as a position, then James favorite would be this by far. A woman willing to “swallow” is quintessential to James really being happy in bed. If actual intercourse is in the question then doggy style, grab ahold of her hips and commence the symphony of destruction.
Auric: Spread Eagle, with her knees a far up as he can push them. It lets him get a deep as possible with her breast in his face. Hope her nipples like teeth on them.
Araris:Ladies who want to make Araris happy need to have flexible hamstrings and touch their toes with spread legs and stay that way for a half hour.
Hair-
James- James pubic hair is kept short trimmed, but never shaven and only because it grows uncomfortable when unkempt. It is the same brown with hints of blonde as his hair, but doesnt have the smatterings of red that his beard does.
Auric- Again the most high matinence and pretty boy of the group, Auric isn't clean shaven but is trimmed to a near stubble length. His Black hair is natural, but he does occasionally dye colors into all of his hair, pubic included
Araris- Araris lets his hair grow naturally unless he takes a job that requires a certain amount of naked diplomacy or wetsuit work, he then shaves down. His color normally matches unless dyed for a mission.
Kink-
James: James is heterosexual, undeniably Dominant, slightly sadistic, and comfortable with exhibition. He would be comfortable switching roles with Athena or Natalie, but they are exceptions. His gladiatorial spirit makes him more than happy to use good little sluts in front of others. He is comfortable participating in “the scene” though he is not comfortable with multiple partner play with other men participating (tried once, made it way too hard to keep an erection and just want comfortable) He experimented a lot in his relationship with Athena, and is comfortable with any kind of pain play that a sub could want with the exception of truly dangerous activities and urine waterworks. The fun of that pain play is in the reaction and look of twisted ecstasy. James would do very well with two wives, though he is accepting and comfortable with the fact that his destined love may ask him to be with her alone. I use the word comfortable because its key for James to have a companion connection with his lovers to really truly be into anything, and he will go to great lengths to please a long term partner and with his loves he is very much focused on fulfilling desires. It's all worth it for the sound she makes calling his name and cumming.
Auric- Auric and James are similar in dominance heteronormativity, and comfort with exhibition, but the attitude ,and execution of these desires is 100% different. Auric's sadism is sharp and defined being fully expanded beyond the bedroom. He takes joy in the act of generating pain for its own sake and not just for the reaction. Auric is the Dom that new subs get warned about, but he makes it very clear up front that if you by the ticket then he owns your plugged ass for the duration of the ride. Auric is big into slave play, and would buy her the nicest and prettiest of collars.
Araris- Not educated in the scene, Araris is a switch, happy to let someone take control long enough for him to not be in control and has both slight sadist and masochistic tendencies. Her nails in his back and teeth on his skin are as much part of the pleasure as his manhood inside her. Araris, if experimenting would not have the same comfort with public sex and pain play that his battle brothers possess. Araris would be much more of a private and side line participant in any kind of kink scene.
Headcanon Game - A to Z (NSFW)
Hey guys! I thought I’d so something fun this weekend, so I did my best to sexualize the alphabet and turn it into a headcanon game!
So here’s how it works. You send me a character (or a few), and the corresponding letters that you want me to answer for them!
A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex) B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s) C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person) D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs) E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?) F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual) G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc) H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.) I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…) J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon) K = Kink (One or more of their kinks) L = Location (Favourite places to do the do) M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going) N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs) O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc) P = Pace (Are they fats and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.) Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.) R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.) S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…) T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?) U = Unfair (how much they like to tease) V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make) W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice) X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words) Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?) Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
I’ll have this running all weekend, so feel free to drop by!
The World would be a much better place if we started looking up to Scientists, Inventors and Engineers rather than Reality TV Stars and Vloggers
Send an activity and my muse will answer the following.
Have they done it? Do they want to do it (again)? Is there someone they’d want to do it with? What would they add to make it better?
I am an adult and do not want protection from adult content

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Send an activity and my muse will answer the following.
Have they done it? Do they want to do it (again)? Is there someone they’d want to do it with? What would they add to make it better?
Reblog if you are willing to plot/RP via Discord/Skype, etc!