samuel

i’m not really into anything sexual atm. i’m looking towards intimacy without it leading to anything sexual? like holding hands. make outs are a bit dodgy atm because they often lead to sex and i’m not in the mood for that

i’m just scared. i think about trans men like sam nordquist who went through hell and i think about how scared he must’ve been. i don’t want that to be me. i know i’m stepping on a few people’s toes here, but i don’t like the idea of dating an older man because i feel like there is such a disconnect in age that would mean my concerns would never be taken seriously and we wouldn’t see eye to eye due to the difference in maturity and experiences. i don’t want to date cis guys because even if they tell you straight to your face that they don’t have a problem with you being trans, they could be lying and you might end up dead because of that. i feel like being a trans man isolates me from 90% of the world. i see a lot of trans men on here who want rough sex and want to be treated like shit during kink and i just couldn’t do that. i’m scared and want to be treated gently

being a trans lad is having a good day then having a nightmare about being killed that still has you shaken for hours afterwards. i wanted to go on a walk today, but i’m not sure about going outside now