Sam's Stray Thoughts

Why dont people ever type :-) like ÷) cause it puts the nose in between the eyes

Do you think the Sphinx ever said "hold on, let me sphink about it..."

Helicopters are like the flies of the aviation world

Straight up striking it in the bowled club, and by "it" I mean, hahah, my pinits

Focusing super hard on a task at work, call that being clocked in

Gender is a performance and I just won an Oscar

TV show called The Makeunder that's about rentals, that have been made whimsical by their tennants, getting reverted back to their millenial grey, sterilised modern original look at the end of a lease when the tennant moves out

It's annoying being attracted to gingers because I know that if I was a bird the fancy bright feather colours would really work for me

Frat bro knight: Yessire

[Gently tracing a boy's sunburn] who did this to you?

Does anyone have a grandpa named Liam? Or do all Liams get removed from the world at a certain age cause I've never seen an old man named Liam

Dating apps just aren't working, can we go back to mating dances?

I think every year they should invite just a random average person to the oscars to represent the rest of us sitting at home

God dude you would definitely fail a loving thy neighbour test,,, cringe

Is a nosebleed just considered a convenient snack if you're a vampire?

I miss actual, legitimate randomised shuffle. I miss getting the same song 5 times in a row because it truly was randomised, I miss hearing a song and going "i forgot I added that". I'm so over this whole "exclusively plays the same 6 songs out a playlist containing 1000 songs, over and over again" bullshit, let me hear the stuff that's buried deep!!!