we ruin too easily

-

“Fake plants? Carson, please, you’re hurting my soul. No, you’ll have real plants or nothing. I’ll come water them myself if that’s what it takes,” she said matter-of-factly, not even a little bit worried about him thinking she was insane. No one knew this side of her better than Carson after all. The last of boundaries wasn’t something new. “Ah, so it was already a thing. Somehow that makes it even dorkier? I mean, I have a bouquet-making playlist for when I’m at work, but that’s totally different.” It wasn’t at all different and the smile on her lips betrayed her statement. Coddling was something Remi was definitely guilty of. She liked keeping the things that mattered to her close to her chest. Putting her name on something and not being able to oversee every single little detail would drive her mad, she knew that. “I guess I’d have to have interview. Look for someone that I could trust enough to take care of my business. I know I can’t do everything myself, that would be madness.” 

-

“Can’t I just work my way up to real plants? I mean, this is for the safety of the plants” Carson suggested with a growing smile since he was pretty sure having fake plant around was sacrilege in her profession but he couldn’t help it. “Hmm does that mean I have to give you a spare key?” He asked if only to gage her reaction tot he idea. Truth be told, he didn’t mind either way. Most of the time, Carson was an open book with nothing to hide so he didn’t consider it an invasion of privacy but he also understood that giving someone access to your home was a big step, friends or otherwise. “How is that different exactly?” He grinned, “Besides, my mom thinks it’s pretty cool” Which meant it was 100% dorky like Remi had said but Carson was embracing it at this point. Once the food was nearly done, Carson grabbed some plates and utensils and set them up at the counter in front of Remi. “Yeah that sounds like a plan, I mean there’s no rush to do it right this instant or anything but it feels like something you should keep in mind. And if you need any of my services, I am always around to help out.”

-

“It is a compliment and that makes a lot of sense. Maybe you’ll finally let me get a few plants in here? I can get you the really low-maintenance kind and show you how to take care of it,” she suggest brightly, excited at the prospect of getting a little greenery in here. Plants made everyone’s lives better, she stood by that. She laughed quietly as he asked Siri to play a playlist with the world’s most dorkiest name ever. This is why she had it bad. “You made an entire playlist for this dinner I didn’t even know was happening?” How could she not read into that? He was making this so unbelievably hard. “I have actually. This investor wants me to possibly open another boutique in his fancy hotel. I think it’s a nice idea, but I’d have to hire people and you know how much of a control freak I am when it comes to my work.”

-

“Okay, don’t totally hate me for suggesting this but... how about a bunch of fake plants?” Carson thought they’d look better and required absolutely no effort to keep alive. While he could appreciate the care that went into a plant, he couldn’t dedicate enough time to actually take care of something, which was a sad truth he had come to realize. “Well, I made this playlist for every night I cook dinner, which is actually turning out to be more often than not” If only because he had been forcing himself to leave work at a reasonable hour and cooking had quickly turned into his me time. “You know coddling things isn’t always the best either. But it’s your business –– kinda like your baby, I get not wanting to expand until you can fully trust someone else to put in the same kind of care and attention as you would” however, that didn’t mean Carson wasn’t hoping for the best when it came to Remi and her floral business, after all, he was a longtime supporter and always would be no matter what. 

-

“It does have a very Carson vibe. I think it’s lovely.” It was true that his home was initially lacking a little personality. When she walked in just now, it had definitely felt like she was entering his home. It made his presence here seem more permanent and not like he could leave any moment. She could see him picking up every single bit of decoration himself. “Sure did. It felt very natural, organic. Not at all rehearsed.” It was flattering that he had prepared for this and it put all sorts of ideas in her head again. Was this something he did for all his friends? Did it mean something more? She pushed the thoughts out of her mind and focused on smooth movements in the kitchen. He wasn’t half-bad at this. He actually looked like he knew what he was doing. Remi had a feeling her help wouldn’t be needed after all. “Yeah, I got a few weddings coming up and the usual orders for birthdays, dates. Business is good. I can handle the work load so far, though. It’s easier now that getting my name out there isn’t an issue anymore, you know? I don’t need to prove myself so much anymore.”

-

“I will take that as a compliment. I just figured I’d actually want to come home if my place felt more like me. Some days I stay at the office a little too long and it’s easier to leave when I get to come home to all this now” Carson said, even though his home was certainly missing things –– like a partner to share it with. “Thank you, I practiced a few times this morning, I’m glad it paid off” He joked with another chuckle before straining the noodles and heating up another pan to bring all the ingredients together. “You know what else I did this morning? I made a playlist –– Siri play Carson’s Awesome Dinner Playlist” he said, to which the robotic voice agreed and played the first track “Red Red Wine” by UB40. The entire playlist was filled with songs that had food in the titles which he thought was clever but probably sounded a bit stupid. “Well, since it’s getting busier have you thought about expanding? I know it’s hard to scale a business that’s so personal, but it could be a good growth opportunity” He suggested, if only because he knew that Remi came to Los Angeles to “make it” and money could be nice, it would certainly allow her to visit her family more ofter. 

-

It was hard for Remi not to be completely smitten with Carson when he checked every single box of hers and said the things he did. She was an hopeless romantic and he was just… prince charming reincarnated. He had gotten to know her so easily, despite her not making it too easy for him at first. She wasn’t someone you would consider guarded, but she was someone who put others before her always. She was used to erasing herself to make other people feel better and Carson didn’t allow that. He did things like showing up at her work place unannounced to invite her to dinner, despite just being friends now. “The intention is reward enough.” She munched on a cookie as they headed back to his place, talking his ear off about a new shipment of flowers she was excited for. The only thing that was able to shut her up was the changes in his home. She looked around in awe, visibly impressed. “It looks so nice. Really different from when I was last here.” The brunette sat at the counter facing him, leaning forward as he moved into action. “Nice job with the rag over the shoulder. You almost look like a real cook. I can always jump in if you’re in need of saving.”

-

“Thank you, I’ll take that as a compliment since the decor before this was taken straight out of an IKEA catalog and this, well, this seems more like me” Was it all cohesive and chic? No. But neither was he. While he liked to blend light and dark colors and mix in modern and contemporary pieces with something a little more weirder, in the end he was trying to create a home, not just a house where he was living. Remi was the first person he had over since the redecoration, mostly because he felt like she knew him the best and if something was off then she’d tell him. “Oh you noticed that move? It’s from Master Chef –– by the way, I watched a lot of Master Chef to prepare for for this” he added with a smirk. He had memorized all the measurement of ingredients for the stir fry dish he was making and continued with the cooking with ease, “So how has work been going? From the look of the shop, I take it you’ve been busy” Which was a good thing, after all, they both enjoyed their work. However, Carson was already going into analytical mode, arguing with himself that perhaps complicating their friendship wasn’t worth the risk when Remi probably had so much on her mind with work right now.

-

Remi’s smile turned a little bashful, her cheeks turning a little red at the suggestion that he’d been observing her so carefully. That level of dedication was the reason her heart skipped a beat whenever she thought of Carson. “Oh, yeah? Is Remi 101 a popular course or were you the only attendee?” She asked him with a chuckle, trying to recover from her very obvious display of schoolgirl crush. “It’s going great. I got a lot done. Just need to pop these in the fridge and I should be about ready to close up.” His invitation was a little surprising, but she liked the thought of Carson cooking. She did most of it back when they were together, so this sounded like a nice change. “I can definitely provide some honest feedback. I can be done here in a few minutes, just hold on.” She put the arrangements away and took care of the administrative stuff that couldn’t wait, leaving the rest for the morning. It could all wait, especially when spending time with Carson was on the line. “Alright, ready to go.”

-

“I think people overlooked the course a little too much which means I get to be the only one who enjoyed it” Being with Remi had alway been easy and intuitive, it was the reason why after their break they remained friends despite the fact that they probably shouldn’t have. At the end of the day, it came down to simply wanting to be around her and Carson would except as much or as little as that meant. “Well, I’m glad your day has been so productive, I’d like to think this homemade dinner would be somewhat of a reward but I don’t think that highly of my cooking yet” He added with a chuckle. He stepped aside and patiently waited as Remi took care of closing. Once she was ready to go, Carson gave her a nod and headed for the door. The trip to his home in Red Cliffs was a short one and after letting Remi judge his new interior which he gave a bit of an uplift with new furniture and decor pieces, he went straight to the kitchen. Tossing a rag over his shoulder, Carson got busy pulling out some fresh produce and getting some water in a pot to boil on the stovetop. “I know I look like I know exactly what I’m doing but don’t let that fool you” he said with a faint smile, remaining quite humble about the ordeal. Of course whatever he made wouldn’t compare to his mother’s but that didn’t mean it would turn out terrible either.

-

Remi wasn’t sure what to think anymore when it came to Carson and their relationship. She was under the impression that they’d shared some moments recently that were definitely not platonic. Like at his family’s Christmas party or even at the work event. Other times, though, it felt like Carson was actually trying to keep things between them strictly friendly and the florist was just confused at this point. Not to mention her own signals probably weren’t nearly as obvious as she felt they were. She was deep in thought, focused on the arrangement in front of her when Carson himself walked in. She couldn’t help but smile brightly, her hands dropping to the counter as he came up to her with a delicious smelling bag. “Ha, ha, hilarious,” she said with light laughter, going right for the bag of cookie. “I don’t doubt it for a second. How is it that you know me so well?”

-

Seeing a smile light up on Remi’s face seemed to make the trip to the bakery worth is, especially since he knew she’d appreciate the small gesture more than anyone else. More that that, Carson just liked seeing Remi happy –– more so when he was the one who was able to cause it too. “Well, years of practice and a lot of studying” Carson said with a firm nod before an amused chuckles escaped out of him. Suffice it to say, he paid attention to the details –– even if it was as silly as cookies and flowers. “How’s your day going? Hopefully not too busy... I was actually gonna ask you if you wanted to have dinner. And by that I mean, I’m trying to learn to cook more and I need a guinea pig to give me an unbiased opinion on my recipes,” It was true enough, his mother had urged him to learn more about his culture and background through cooking and he agreed. However, inviting Remi into the mix was intentional because he was hoping to sort through his feelings and tell her what was on his mind.

As the days went by, Carson found his mind being fogged up with thoughts of Remi and their relationship. It hadn’t occurred to him that perhaps a relationship was what they were headed for and it made him question things –– like, was that what she wanted? And more importantly, what did he truly want? In the end, he found himself heading through the doors of the flower shop Remi worked at with a bag of cookies from Diddy Riese –– after all, you couldn’t bring flowers to a girl who was surrounded by flowers on the daily. Besides, Carson knew the quickest way to Remi’s heart was through her stomach or sweet tooth, “Hi, I have a last minute order –– can I get two dozen white roses please?” he said as he approached the counter with a growing smile, “Wait, you don’t like roses, huh” That much he remembered from their talk about weddings, which prompted him to place the bag of cookies on the counter next, “These might be better than roses, I promise you.”

“ so are you. “ & blushed cheeks stain, painted petals opened in dismay. it had been so long. yet, she had spent apricot hued evenings memorizing the parts of himself she had taken with her. the debris amongst the wreckage, spinning until she is pooled in sticky sweet love ! love ! love ! o, how she had envisioned this reunion ; plush desires alighting a fire. she yearns to remain in her early twenties, nestled in the walls of the bookshop , - legs slightly parted - mouth lathered in honey. “ i’m only passing, however, i have to get back to paris tomorrow night. “ the words seemed unfitting in her mouth, crowded - unwanted. the mere mention of the future she had left him for ; charred & splintered.

“ you haven’t changed. “ only he has. lines decorating the side of his hues are more prominent, and it takes her strength to not trace them : to drown in them. “ are you not going to invite me in ? i promise i will pay for something.” tongue tied & giddy. “ i was always your favourite customer.” speckled vision blurs, angelic hues fluttering - golden spillage, she plays with it ; fingertips twirling the ends of her tresses.

-

Brandon found himself smiling –– somehow it felt like ages since he’d been able to pull the corners of his lip upward into something that could only be described as pure happiness at the sight of Kitty Summers. However, it went just as quickly as it came when she then announced she was only here for the night. It always felt that way with Kitty –– she came around and made his heart flutter only to leave him hanging to pick up the pieces. Still, he didn’t resent her for it. Truthfully, he probably never could. “Paris?” He said with a scoff, the one thing he could never compete with, though to be fair the lovely city held such a high standard against a washed up writer. “Paris doesn’t have this” He said, motioning to the book store and himself. While true, perhaps that was part of the allure of Paris to begin with. 

“I don’t know if I should take that as a compliment or not?” Brand said, pretending to think about it for a moment before the smile arose onto his features once more. “Thanks, you look... well, you always look great” He said with a shake of his head. Since the day he met her, Kitty had always been the most beautiful girl he’d ever laid his eyes on and that hadn’t changed over the years. “I don’t know if I should...” he teased before opening the door to the bookshop for her to pass through, “Alright, come on in. Haven’t had a chance to tidy but I think you’ll find that it’s mostly unchanged” He added before following her insides. “Yeah, favorite customer” he repeated, though in his head he said favorite person. “So one night in this god forsaken town, why this place?” And why him? 

@sammrpshere​.

age had spread it’s unruly vines, caught in the bloodied remains of her past. kitty summers had not been home since she had left. nor had she intended to dip a wingless skeleton into the divide that separated those she had left, to whom she had become. wine soaked, peach stained features, - golden locks caught in the summertime hue. that sticky sweet heat that demanded open mouth kisses. & she heaves. for that lost romantic that scaled the walls of lakewood was buried within thorn shaped lungs. 

love love love ! it’s enough to make her foolish & she glances at a man who has haunted her. it makes her dizzy, longing, - needy. knuckles rattling against the window of the bookshop that had once been their safe haven ; a chapel, hymns pressed into open palms, her name painted scarlet red and moaned. she waves, nostalgia gets the better of her, a swelling of heart beats hammering. 

-

For someone who always described his hometown as nothing short of disastrous, it was surprising when Brandon Jacobs decided to settle there permanently when he got older. He’d never admit it to anyone, but he had chosen the town he claimed to hate because among the painful memories, it had always remained his mother’s favorite place. If she could find the beauty in such a simple town then perhaps he could as well. Even now, he had since put his pen to rest and left his New York dreams to run the the book shop. He often found happiness between the aisles, nestled in the corner with his nose deep in a book. Today he had been rereading an old favorite –– Shakespeare, the one Sally despised which had made him read even more defiantly than ever.  

Pausing at a good place, Brandon walked off to flip over the open sign on the door and that’s when his world seemed to stop ––– Kitty Summers. He hadn’t seen her in such a long time and yet despite that he recognized her without a single doubt. Opening the door, Brandon stood between the doorframe, as if the wood could save him from whatever thunder storm Kitty Summers would be throwing his way. With a faint but kind smile, Brandon gave her a nod, “You’re still way too good for this stupid town” And he’d certainly die on that hill, too. 

               There was no way around it: the truth hurts. And it hurt really fucking bad. The weight of guilt had become unbearable, so, months back, Alana slipped right out of Devinstone’s unimpressive city limits and headed south. It was what the brunette had always done best: run away. Then again, that internal mantra was just more of the wily brunette’s way of punishing herself given that it was far from the truth. In heartbreak, it was true that Alana was weak and soft, not the wild child that threw caution to the wind and made people stand back in awe of her charisma and fire. However, the reality was that she’d always been a fighter and someone who stood her ground no matter what. Something inside of her broke though when the way Leo looked at her changed following her confession, her fire had quickly been snuffed out when the only person who really and truly seemed to love her pulled himself away from her. It was a truth that had been owed. Right? So many times she questioned her action; that night she just let everything spill out red on the floor and destroy what had been stored as the best memory she’d had of her twenty-nine years of breathing. Would it have really been so bad to let the lie live and they part ways as lovers that couldn’t work out? She was too much of a mess and he was in too deep with his brother? Somewhere in that pensive head of hers she knew that over the time the lie would’ve eaten her alive. It didn’t seem wrong to have wished it could have been painless for him.

              The fact that Leo hurt so badly told Alana how deeply he cared for her. As wrong as it was to feel some level of comfort in that, the brunette couldn’t help but let it swallow her whole in her worst and lowest moments.

              When she had made it to Baton Rouge, determined to take a ride out on one of those paddlewheel boats, Alana only spent a little money on a room for a couple of nights. The plan had been to keep heading south, to wind up in some place like Buenos Aires where there was plenty of distance between herself and Devinstone, where she could push everything further from her mind and not feel everything so much. How could she be so foolish? There was no way to escape the mind, even less to escape the yearnings and pangs of the heart. Don’t you know your problems follow you wherever you run to? The words echoed for days and weeks in her head as she steered clear of New Orleans, since learning that she and Leo had been in The Big Easy roughly around the same time. It was nice to fantasize that he had gone there chasing her down after she had left him and New York, looking for her and finding her escaping their love unfathomable. Prolonging her pain seemed to be something she was astutely skilled at, and that was only one of the things she tortured herself with following their first run-in at the bar and subsequently when she’d later made her confession at the nightclub. Maybe he wouldn’t let her get away a second time? There was a chance Leo would reconsider the offer she had made before things went from bad to worse, right? So often in those first few weeks she looked over her shoulder and around corners, half expecting to see his lumbering frame and stern expression headed straight to her. 

              Eventually — Alana stopped looking back. A callous had formed in her chest and her heart was walled away behind fresh mortar and bricks. And rather than continuing south, in the months that followed, the brunette headed west. It took her awhile to take notice that she was simply following the pattern she had set before, the first time around, once she left New York and headed to New Orleans before Los Angeles. The brunette felt different this time, everything was different — instead of looking over her shoulder hoping no one was running after her, Alana had, well, stopped looking back, but longed for someone to come chase her down. As much as her heart cried out for forgiveness, she wanted to be able to make right on her regrets and take away the pain she had afflicted Leo with. He deserved that. There had to be a way she could make right on her wrongs and Alana had a few wild thoughts considering it, one being that she find Mike and tell him everything herself. The only thing that had stopped her from doing so were Leo’s words in her head, and truly, the brunette was terrified of making things worse for her ex. Somehow, she resigned to her depression and loneliness, unable to breakaway completely from the guilt she harbored. Alana the mess was better off alone and away. Not only did she have funds but she could do her job from virtually anywhere.

              What brought the somewhat reformed wild child back to Devinstone? Maybe someone loosely called a friend had mentioned that Vibe’s bouncer was gone, up and left town a while back. Mostly it was her mother and the fact that months away from her place, Alana had things to check on and needed a refresh of clothing. She also needed her editing equipment. So, when she returned, it was done quietly and cautiously. Not a peep was spoken to anyone about when she might stroll through town once more and Alana had gotten away with it for at least a week if not more without anyone seeking out the somewhat tamed hellion. What was depressing though was that her place was as exactly as she had left it, and the brunette had half hoped that she had been robbed and her townhome would’ve been trashed. Forcing her to move elsewhere. It was stupid. Leo had only stepped foot in her place the one time but memories of him were everywhere within those walls. Mostly because of the box of things he hadn’t taken, the mementos she’d had up around her place of him and their relationship, the fact that the bed was where she’d shed the most tears following all the harsh words that hit her chest following her confession. Or, then there was the stairs, where she sat and watched the door after he had left. The only thing he had taken that day were the various pills she’d had left on her coffee table. While, in the end Alana had been grateful, she also hated that he had still been looking after her.

              In fact, her former dealer was the only person that wondered where the fuck she had gotten off to in the months that she was gone. Alana and her mother were so estranged that she only heard from the woman a couple of weeks before finding herself in Devinstone again. She had some mother drama to attend to, but that was something she would tackle once she got her house in order. For nearly a week straight she purged and cleaned the entire townhome. Then she filled it with fresh things; furniture, food, nicknacks, and a fresh coat of paint on the inside walls. After a week of strolling her hometown, to and fro for this and that, keeping a low profile, Alana saw no signs of her former love. That alone let her breathe a little easier. Not because the brunette didn’t want to see Leo, she always craved him, but because she had really nothing to say. There was no fix, nothing she could do to make things better, and it was the most defeated she’d possibly ever felt. Years later she still loved him, still dreamt of him, despite all her mistakes and wrong turns he had become all she had wanted and knew she could never have. That was the curse of what she had agreed to do. 

              Yet, there he was, that voice and strong presence that halted Alana in her tracks and caused her entire body to freeze up. Her breath withheld in her lungs for so long that they started to ache as her dark eyes moved rapidly all over Leo’s face — shock, relief, anxiety, love, and hope flooded her small figure in an overwhelming mixture. Alana swallowed thickly, like honey was stuck in her throat, and — fuck, he was so handsome. What a sight for sore eyes. No, more than that. Those same tees he wore and that leather jacket, his hair still slicked in perfect place, and his little lopsided grin just about decimated the unprepared brunette. Was he joking with her? Leo seemed… lighthearted. While that was good, it let Alana know he was doing pretty well, that he had gotten past the heartbreak she caused, it hurt that he was okay at the same time. After nearly choking on the need for oxygen and something akin to a laugh, Alana forced a smile as she looked up at her ex. “Who says I’m lonely?” The brunette’s shoulder’s straightened and she falsely attempted to stand a little prouder. It was something she loved and hated about Leo, how he had always paid attention to the details and knew so much by looking things over. “You know I’m a nightwalker.” Much to his dismay, actually. “This isn’t New York, there’s no bad guys in this dumbass town that are gonna mug me.” It was something she loved to use against him in the past. Leo hated her walking alone but she refused to not walk, therefore forcing him to spend just a little more time with her. His protective nature made her feel loved, cared for, that she was valuable to someone. Even if it pulled him selfishly away from things he needed to do. Alana had been so starved for love, affection, and any level of devotion that she took advantage. 

              “Looks more like you need someone looking after you.” Dark eyes moved over the purpling around his eye and then dropped to his red knuckled hands. “What happened to you?” Part of her knew the answer, another part of her knew that he wouldn’t give her anything straight, but the biggest part of her cared too fucking much to focus on her and his little teasing. She had been trouble that had erupted in his life, just maybe he had been a little bit more in the end. They were counterpoints after all. “Have you been loitering here?” Having noticed the cigarette butts on the side of the building, her dark eyes narrowed up at her ex. “How long?” Alana had to clip her words because in a matter of minutes she was already on the verge of inviting him into her place and offering to clean up his wounds. Pace yourself.

-

Leo’s father liked to say that people came and went but the people that were meant to stay in your life had a way of weaseling their ways back in without fail. While his father might’ve been talking about himself and his sons, it was something Leo couldn’t help but bring to the table when it came to his relationship with Alana. Their relationship had started as a whirlwind and somehow only got more and more chaotic. Despite that, they found themselves once again colliding. Leo wasn’t a believer in fate or the signs but he was a believer in people being drawn to each other, almost like a magnet, sometimes they pushed each other away and other times they went diving head first into one another. This particular moment seemed to be the latter.

It had been such a long time since Leo had seen Alana’s smile, even a small and mundane one as she was showing now, but it still brought back the butterflies he felt when they first met. Her demeanor seemed to give her away and it evoked a familiar smug expression to return to Leo’s features, lighting up his face in a way that had been dormant for months. “Are you telling’ me you aren’t lonely?” He said, brow raising as he called her bluff. Most of the time Leo called things as he saw them, and everything about Alana seemed to scream defeated. “If you’ve got some guy waiting on your next beck and call then by all means…” He stated, stepping to the side slightly to further prove he wasn’t there to hold her up if she had plans. He didn’t suspect she found herself a relationship despite not quite keeping up with her romantic encounters. All he knew was that he had been unable to move on since he saw her and all he could assume (or selfishly hope) was that the feeling had been mutual. Seeing Alana with another guy would no doubt ignite some of his pent up rage issues, but more than that it’d feel like the heartbreak from years ago coming back for a double feature, so for now he tried not to think about who Alana was spending all her free time with and was trying to focus on the fact that she wasn’t running away from him right now.

Alana being an avid night walker certainly wasn’t a surprise, though it was an annoyance at one point during their relationship since it never ceased to make him worry. Even now while they weren’t together, or even friends for that matter, he found himself incessantly worrying about her. And almost as if she already read his thoughts, her next comment shut him right up for a moment. After all, she was right. Devinstone was practically a suburb compared to some of the streets they hung out on in New York and there was probably very little danger waiting for her in the dark alley ways here. “Maybe not mug you, but there are definitely some bad guys in this dumbass town” After all, he was there, and given all the shady shit in his past, Devinstone probably felt more seedy with himself and his friends around. Still, hurting Alana would never be part of his intention. Not when they first met, not when her confession broke his heart all over again, and certainly not now.

Letting out a scoff as he tried to cover up his bruised knuckles with his jacket sleeve, it was clear there was no hiding it from Alana. Sometimes she could be just as meticulously observant as he was. “Yeah, well, you should see the other guy” He said, lip upturning into a grin. When she asked what happened, Leo mustered up an answer off the cuff that was more or less bullshit, “Would you believe some jackass fell right into my fist? Twice” He posed the rhetorical question, knowing it probably wasn’t something to make light of but given what he did on a regular basis it was hard not to find some humor in the everyday. Besides, telling Alana the gruesome details was something he had always refused to do. The last thing he wanted was her anxiety and worries getting the best of her. Though, given all the time and distance that passed between them, Leo was warmed by the hint of care in her voice. It had been a long time since someone cared about him the way she had and he still longed for it. 

“I just needed a smoke break, that’s all. It’s a small town...” Leo shrug his shoulders nonchalantly like he hadn’t been waiting to run into his ex-girlfriend the last hour or so. Admitting that meant admitted he still cared about her and somehow that seemed like something far too vulnerable to tell her at the moment. “Does it even matter?” It didn’t. Not really. Leo was there, probably longer than he should have been, but he was still there.

-

The dark slash of Sydney’s brow arched in time with an undignified snort. “If she approved of my fuck-ups I think we’d have an even bigger problem on our hands, don’t you?” Though she didn’t love the idea of someone out there passing judgement on her past without knowing all the factors, it wasn’t lost on Syd that she’d done that very thing when it came to Josephine. Pot meet kettle, or some shit like that. Tucking her lower lip behind her teeth, she let the comparison in her head marinate for a moment.

If anything, re-evaluating her stance on his mother kept her mind from drifting to the newest elephant in the room.

The way she saw it, Sydney had three options. Lie, and tell Lucas he’d be making the biggest mistake of his life if he left with her now. Lie, and tell Lucas she thought he should go and wouldn’t be bothered either way. Or—- pulling the hangnail clean off her thumb with a wince, Syd inhaled for courage and chose door number three. “I think if the roles were reversed and I suddenly had the chance to have my mom around again… I’d be insane not to consider the offer.” The truth already tasted foul on her tongue, and she hadn’t even gotten to the hard parts yet.

“I think— I think even if you don’t admit it you’ve spent a really long time hopin’ for a sign that your life could be different. That you had another choice.” Hadn’t she preached that to him innumerous times over the years? Hadn’t she urged him to look forward and imagine himself a new path? Now he might have one ripe for the taking. A piece of Sydney’s soul cleaved in two just thinking about a real goodbye, but if she couldn’t give it to him straight then she had no right claiming she ever truly loved him in the first place.

Under no circumstances did she expect to find herself in tears that day, but Syd wiped a wet track off her cheek, anyway. “I think you probably owe it to yourself to at least see what might happen. I think it could be good for you— but I want you to stay.” It was probably the closest she’d come to revealing how she actually felt since their conversation on Colleen’s porch swing. “Unfortunately for me,” she let loose some odd combination of a cough, laugh, and clearing of her throat, “those are kinda two entirely different things. Guess I never have been that great and gettin’ my heart and my head on the same page.”

-

Lucas could agree with Sydney on that particular issue, though he’s argue it wasn’t so much about approving those actions as it was understanding them in that moment and knowing that people were capable of changing and learning from their mistakes. Still, in both Josephine and Sydney’s case, he was sure neither of them needed the lecture. After all, Lucas was still very much dedicated to having both of them in his life despite the backlash. If that wasn’t a testament to what truly mattered to him then he wasn’t sure what would be.

With Sydney’s next words, Lucas let out a soft sigh as his gaze moved to the floor. While he had never explicitly said it, it was clear that Sydney seemed to know him better than he knew himself at times. Because she was right. He had been looking and hoping for a sign that his life could turn into something more than just bars and bikes. Truth be told, he had been longing for the change for years and hadn’t quite gotten the courage to admit this lifestyle wasn’t for him, until now. “I love Wilmington, I always will. And I’ll always have the guys’ back but… I don’t know, I feel like the past few years I’ve just been going through the motions and doing shit that I don’t wanna do…” Running the club was something that had been sprung on him and denying the position was impossible, however, what Lucas truly wanted to do was run his tattoo parlor and look after his dogs. He was tired of always having to come through for the club and risking his life for something he didn’t even believe in. The drugs and the money and the power never mattered to him the way it seemed to matter to John, in that respect they had always differed. And even now, he wasn’t quite sure how to even go about that conversation but admitting he needed to have it seemed to be the first step.

Seeing Sydney get emotional should have been expected and yet he found himself a little surprised. After all, he didn’t view it as a goodbye –– there was never a goodbye with them, at least that’s what he had learned. Sydney had a way of coming in and out of his life with ease that he didn’t expect their relationship to completely dissipate if he did actually leave Wilmington. Noticing the lazy hue in her eyes, Lucas, reached over and wiped what was left of her tear track. “Hey, come on, nothin’s set in stone yet” A faint smile came to his features and it was hard not to feel heartbroken and elated at the same time given Sydney’s confession. They had been in somewhat of a purgatory the last few months, not quite friends but not quite something more, and Sydney admitted that she wanted him to stay was like admitting she cared and he hadn’t felt that in a really long time.

“I ain’t leaving any time soon...” Or maybe not even at all, it was hard to tell yet. “But I think it could be good for me too” Perhaps it could even be good for them, though he held his tongue on adding those words. “I’m just leaving my options open for now...” he said, letting out a bit of a stifled chuckle at the thought, “I guess it’s nice to actually have options for once” For someone whose life had always been planned out by his father, Lucas was learning that making decisions on his own was difficult but a worthy price to pay when it came to being his own man. 

-

Sydney couldn’t tell if that made things better or worse. On one hand, knowing she wasn’t the only one made Lucas’ silence feel less like a personal attack. On the other hand, it also meant he’d had to navigate the entire situation by himself. 

But… maybe that wasn’t such a bad thing?

“I can’t say I love feeling left out of your life,” she admitted after a brief silence, “but I guess in this very specific, singular case you… maybe might’ve made the right choice. Maybe.” One side of her mouth slowly tipped toward a smile. Because the truth was? Syd couldn’t promise how she would’ve reacted to the news. Couldn’t promise she would’ve left her opinions to herself so that he could figure out what he truly wanted to do. At least now Lucas knew without a doubt he’d made his choice for him, not because of anyone else’s influence. No matter how much she hated being wrong she could at least own up to that much.

“I can’t sit here and say I don’t like your mother ‘cause I don’t know her. I only know what she did to you. That’s what I don’t like.” And yeah, maybe taking such a strong stance in opposition was a bit hypocritical, but she wouldn’t apologize for how much she cared about him. “But if you’ve forgiven her—” a deep sigh slowly filtered out from her nose— “then I will try to keep an open mind.” As far as promises went it was the best she could give. “I’m happy for you. I really am. I just don’t want to see you get hurt.” Sydney hoped he understood that. Regardless of all they’d been through - all they’d put each other through - all she ever wanted was to see him happy. 

Not once did she ever imagine that might be outside of Wilmington, though.

“She asked you to go as in… move? As in move… to Maine?” Even without confirmation she knew that’s exactly what he meant. What she couldn’t figure out was why the hell she didn’t see it coming. Of course Josephine wanted him with her. He was her son. 

Suddenly, Sydney’s mouth went dry. Her eyes grew damp. She didn’t know what the fuck to do with her hands. It took a minute to digest the possibility that she might lose him all over again, but eventually she managed a jerky nod. Then, almost immediately, her gaze fled to the floor. To focus on something else - anything other than the hammer of her heart in a collapsing chest - she started picking at a hangnail on her thumb. The tiny, sharp pain couldn’t even compare to what might be coming. “Have you uhm… have you given her an answer? Are you gonna go?”

-

“Yeah, maybe...” Lucas said quietly, if only because it still felt like something he was having a difficult time navigating on his own. Usually he could go to his dad or the guys in the club, or even Sydney, but this issue seemed so personal and uncertain that he couldn’t be sure if he was even making the right decision. As much as he appreciated Sydney’s opinion on things, her obvious bias prevented him from actually asking her what she thought. He understood why she was so protective and he couldn’t fault her for it, but that didn’t mean he thought she should write his mother off completely either. 

“I only know what she did to you. That’s what I don’t like.” At her words, Lucas couldn’t help the faint, off-the-cuff chuckle that escaped. There wasn’t nothing particularly funny about her words other than the fact that it sounded like a very similar conversation he had previously with his mother, “It’s weird, that’s what she said about you.” While they had both abandoned him when he needed them most at one point in his life, Lucas could say with certainty that neither Sydney or his mother deserved to have their mistakes held over their head for this long. “I’ll be okay, Syd. Whatever happens, it’ll be okay” He said, almost to reassure himself since the last thing he wanted was to have his heartbroken another time by his mother, but that was the risk he was willing to take.

When the issue of Maine came up, Lucas knew right off the bat that Sydney would need time to get used to the idea. Averting his eyes downward, Lucas shrugged his shoulders as he tried to come up with some sort of explanation that made sense, “I know Maine’s far away and I don’t know anyone up there but... I don’t know, a fresh start could be good for me” Leaving the club was something Lucas had been battling for years now, perhaps this would give him the extra push to actually follow through this time. “I haven’t made any decisions yet, no. All I know is that if I stay here nothin’s gonna change” He’s ride his bike, work at the shop, and devote his entire life to the club. There would be no growth, no chance at something more to define himself other than a ragged old vest. At this point in his life, Lucas wanted more. It was selfish, but after consistently putting everyone and everything else above himself, Lucas decided he deserved to be a little selfish. “Do you think I should stay?” He finally said, eyes looking up towards her for any sign that he was making a bad decision. After all, what was he even staying for? His relationship with Sydney hadn’t gone anywhere the last few months and it was clear the club was taking its toll on him already. 

And, just like that, Josephine was gone.

“Well.” Cheeks puffed, Sydney slowly expelled a pent up breath. Her stare remained locked on the now closed door. “I guess that answers that question.” It didn’t take a genius to feel the snub in his Mom’s voice, subtle as it was. That meant she knew exactly who she was. Exactly what she’d done. 

Oddly, though, it didn’t bother Syd. If anything, she almost - almost - respected her for it. If Josephine cared enough to judge her for her crimes maybe she wasn’t as heartless as Sydney always thought.

Then again, how could she say for sure? Up until five minutes ago she didn’t even know Josephine existed beyond a bitter, painful memory. Clearly she couldn’t trust her understanding of anything anymore.

Turning her attention Lucas’ hunched back they sank deeper into tense silence. “Why didn’t you tell me you’ve been talking to her for almost a year now?” It leapt from her lips before she could stop it, but she already knew the answer to that, didn’t she? Syd never made her disapproval a secret when it came to his mom and her choice. Having lost her own parents to chance she couldn’t fathom someone willingly leaving their child behind. Couldn’t forgive it so easily, either.

But—- he didn’t owe her a front row seat to his secrets, and this wasn’t about her or her opinions. Before Lucas could give voice to the obvious, Syd murmured a quick, “Nevermind,” and vowed to nurse her bruised feelings later. The only thing that actually mattered was the fact that his mom was suddenly (or not so suddenly) back around.

Carefully treading a thin line between suspicion and concern, she braved another step closer. When Syd was close enough to smell the lather of soap on his hands, she finally pleaded, “Will you at least tell me you’re okay?” Her fingertips itched to find his shoulder. To make him face her so she could hunt down the truth in his eyes. She had to shove her hands deep into her pockets to fight down the urge. “It’s just… this isn’t some small thing. This, her bein’ here, is what you want, right? And she’s gonna keep bein’ here even after she goes back?”

-

Lucas had learned over the years not to take Sydney’s overbearingness as a negative. She tended to care too much and just wanted to protect the people she still had in her life. That had been part of the reason why he never told her that he was reconnecting with his mother. She would be too defensive and distrusting about the woman, and even if Lucas knew he should be cautious about everything –– it was his mother. In the end, it didn’t matter to him what her intentions were, what mistakes riddled her past, or even what she thought about his friends –– she had always been the most important person in his life and no amount of distance could change that. The concept would probably be foreign to Sydney but he hoped she would at least understand that he didn’t burn bridges as easily as his father. 

“I didn’t tell anyone” Lucas said after a long pause. He wasn’t sure if that would make her feel better or not but it was the truth. Obviously, he couldn’t tell his father or anyone else at the club. But as big of a deal as it felt to him, he also hid it from Owen and Micah and everyone else he considered family. “But that didn’t mean I didn’t want to...” Because he did. His mother coming back into his life was something that made him happy and he wanted to share that with the people closest to him, but he wasn’t sure if their judgements would get the best of them and ruin whatever progress he was able to make. And it was too important to him to leave to chance. 

Grabbing the dishrag and wiping the water from his hands, Lucas turned around to face Sydney. It seemed like this wasn’t something they could tip toe around anymore and Lucas figured he’d face it head on with honesty. “I’m okay, Syd. I don’t know if she’ll stay or if she’ll go and never come back but I know I want her around. She’s my mom, and I want to be part of her life” The real question would be how much Josephine wanted him back in her new life that seemed so different from his own.

“I know she ain’t perfect and I know you’ve probably got your own feelings about her, but she’s here. She apologized and that’s enough for me” Would it be enough for Sydney? Lucas wasn’t quite sure. One of the main reasons why Lucas didn’t tell Sydney to begin with was because of how much it would affect his life and whatever they had been working to repair the last few months... “She asked me to come up to Maine with her...” He trailed off, shrugging his shoulders becuase he knew it sounded ridiculous and there was no way a tatted up biker with a prison record could fit in with a seemingly perfect little family up north, but it wasn’t like his life in Wilmington was adding up to much either. 

-

It was lucky Sydney didn’t know what to say or where to begin in the minutes that followed. She probably wouldn’t have gotten a word in regardless. From the time the unfamiliar woman stepped into the doorframe, asking if she was the dog sitter, to the moment Lucas brushed her off as merely a friend she just stood there… mouth slack, brain melted. 

This wasn’t some floozy conquest or secret new squeeze. It was his mom. His fucking mom. The woman who’d abandoned him in his most vulnerable years without a backward glance let alone an explanation. Now, more than ever, his recent silence made sense.

But Syd had to wonder… who was Lucas trying to hide?  Her existence from Josephine?  Or his mother from the ex-girlfriend with a grudge?

When she finally managed to look at him again a new flavor of hurt briefly flickered in her eyes. Maybe Lucas had his reasons - reasons that were probably justified - but it still felt like a kick in the guy being left in the dark. Teeth sank into her cheek, Syd hovered uncertainly at the threshold, then finally took a wary step forward. 

“I’ll— I’ll only stay for a minute,” she privately murmured, one palm halfway to his chest before she thought to hold off the gesture. Because if there was one thing she didn’t have to guess at? It was the fact that Lucas did not want her there. Of that his reluctance left little doubt. Swallowing hard, she rounded off the promise with a nod before joining his mother in the kitchen.

“I’m Sydney Fitzpatrick. Danny and Erin’s niece.” Although she couldn’t find it in herself to fully turn on the charm, she at least managed to offer her hand and a closed smile. “You must be Josephine. I’m sorry for bargin’ in on y’all like this, but— I didn’t realize you were in town.” Did either of them miss the not-so-subtle look she tossed back in Lucas’ direction? 

“Is your mom just here for the weekend, or…?” 

-

The moment in the threshhold of his apartment felt like it lasted years instead of seconds. Truth be told, Lucas couldn’t even quite look Sydney in the eye at the time since he already felt the hint of tension growing as the information soon made itself known. He stood between assuring Sydney that nothing was wrong between them and catering to his mother’s need for peace since her return to Wilmington. In the end, the winner of that battle had been obvious the moment Lucas had introduced Sydney with so little as a name. Though that particular detail was intentional and as much as he hoped they could talk about it later, it seemed like timing wans’t going to work in their favor this time around...

“Sydney” Josephine said with a pause, looking up from the fridge for a moment and then to Lucas and back again. “Well it’s lovely to meet you Sydney, do give Erin my warmest regards. I’ll only be in town for a short while and hoping to keep things very minimal” She said a moment after. “Anyhow, I do have a few more errands to run in town and people to catch up with but I’ll see you for dinner, Luke. I’m sure you two have lots to talk about” She added, eyes glazing over Sydney before walking over to grab her coat. With a quick hug to Lucas and a wave, Josephine saw herself out rather quickly. 

It was hard not to be disappointed by his mother’s departure once again. Especially when he was almost certain the reasoning had more to do with Sydney than anything else. While Lucas had never been very generous when it came to words, Josephine was his mother and when she asked him for the truth, he gave it to her. Including all the hardships that Sydney might have contributed to. What his mother actually thought of the people in his life was difficult to gage at this point. He knew she felt somewhat resentful yet grateful to the Fitzpaticks for taking care of her son in her absence, but when it came to someone like Sydney who was one of the reasons Lucas spent years in prison, well, could you blame a mother for being apprehensive about the same woman still being around?

Once the door shut, Lucas let out a deep breath that he didn’t even realize he was holding before returning his attention back to Sydney. Her previous question coming to him after a moment of pause, “Yeah, the weekend” he replied rather simply with a nod. Stepping back into the kitchen, Lucas busied himself by washing some of the dishes in the sink if only to keep his attention on something other than what he imagined would be disappointment on Sydney’s face, “We’ve been talking for a while –– since last Christmas. I’ve been avoiding a visit –– you know, planes ain’t really my thing and Maine’s a hell of a long drive, so she dropped by instead” he shrugged his shoulders. Lucas imagined coming back to a home you weren’t welcomed to would be difficult and as much as he didn’t want to burden his mother, she seemed to think he was worth the effort and scrutiny from the people of her past, so there she was, visiting for the weekend.

Channing chuckled at the thought of Ben cooking. She clearly hadn’t been around when it happened or she would’ve never let him hear the end of it. “Of course he wasn’t successful. I’d be surprised if that boy knew how to boil an egg without burning the whole place down,” she said a bit harshly. She rarely saw the other efforts people made for her. She was inherently cold, a lot colder than Dana or even her brother and siblings. She closed the door once Dana was inside, looking around at the small space. It was a bit cluttered as per usual and she wished she could hide the mess with her body. “Nah, it’s okay. They’re all out right now. Ben should be back soon-ish, but I’m glad for the company regardless,” she told her with a smile. The brunette couldn’t help the warm smile that spread on her face at the sight of the cookies. Even after everything Channing had done to her, Dana had still taken the time to bake for them and come all the way here during a very busy period. “I can’t promise I won’t eat all of those before the others even gets back home. You didn’t have to do any of this, Dana.” She panicked a bit when she asked if she had interrupted anything, suddenly remember what she had been doing before Dana knocked. “I was just painting some pieces,” she said with a nonchalent shrug, moving her body to hide the lot of them. “Which you can’t look at yet.”

-

“I don’t know, I think he deserves a little more credit. He might not be that good but he’s persistent, and sometimes that’s half the battle” Dana said with a faint smile. After all, even if Ben’s sibling didn’t always understand how much effort he put into taking care of them, Dana certainly did. She remembered being the same try-hard stand-in parent with her own siblings growing up so on that level she could relate. “Yeah I know but I wanted to. I mean you’re still important to me... you all are” She quickly added, not wanting to put any added pressure considering how complicated their relationship was these days. “No elves to help you paint this year? Interesting” Dana mused with a hint of a smile as she glanced around at the ceramics on the table. “I’m taking Abbi and Jake downtown to look at the Christmas lights, you’re free to tag along if you want?” She threw the offer out there, not sure what Channing’s plans were for the rest of the evening, all she knew was that she wanted to spend more time with her.

Kenny felt the need to apologize for her manners, but was reassured when Ben smiled at her the same way he usually did without a single hint of annoyance. She nodded, not too surprised by how welcome he immediately made her feel and let him lead her to the kitchen. “Thanks,” she muttered, wincing slightly when water hit the wound. He seemed to know exactly what to do to fix this mess she’d created and a few minutes later had a hand bandaged and felt a lot less pain. “You’re good at that.” He had younger siblings, which he seemed to take care of, so that probably explained why he had somehow made everything better in instants. It suddenly hit her how badly she was intruding on what was supposed to be family time when she spotted his siblings all sitting in front of a Christmas movie and eating Chinese food. An off choice, but one she’d pick over her mom’s dry turkey any day. “Are you sure this is okay? Your siblings probably don’t want a stranger intruding on their family time.” Also, she needed a beer. Badly.

- 

“Thanks, I’ve had a lot of practice” Ben said with a hint of a smile as he leaned against the kitchen counter acorss from her. Considering how much trouble his older brother and younger siblings go into, it was no surprise that Ben learned very quickly how to patch a wound and even apply some stitches if he needed to. Compared to that, this was child’s play. “It’s fine, Kenny. Seriously, the more ther merrier. Besides, you ain’t a stranger around here” Some of his siblings had seen her in passing or had known of her due to Ben, that and their home would never be denied to someone who just needed to get away. “Can I get you some eggnog? Or maybe some hot chocolate?” He asked, unable to hide his growing grin since it seemed a little childish and probably wouldn’t compete with a stiff drink, it’s what everyone else in the house was sipping on. Without a response, Ben reached for a glass in the dishwasher before filling it up with some hot chocolate anyway, handing to her, “Actually, I’m glad you came by since I, uh, got somethin’ for you...” Walking over to one of the kitchen drawers, Ben pulled out one of the Christmas cards with her name on it and handed it over. The front of the card was adorned with a festive photo of the family’s two cats –– toast and jame –– and signed by everyone, including a special note from Ben. He had never been very good at putting his thoughts into articulate words but writing them out meant he could go at his own pace without any judgements or mishaps. 

    Oh.

She’d already started reaching with eager fingers for what little could be seen of Harley’s nose when Lucas’ dismissal hit home. Now, awkwardly suspended somewhere between that short-lived hello and such a swift goodbye, Sydney froze.

Still sank halfway into a crouch at the top of his steps.   Still trapped in an idiotic, shamelessly excited, cheek splitting grin.

Stupid. She was so stupid. Common sense had warned her to call before heading over, but Syd let herself get swept up in residual holiday cheer. In the bittersweet nostalgia of their yester-years. Armed with a towering stack of Thanksgiving leftovers she let herself assume he’d have time for her when, in reality, she only had her own ego to back up the claim. Not for the first time, reality crept back to give Sydney a big ol’ bite the in the ass.

Eking out a chuckle she rose from her uniformed knees. An apology for barging over, uninvited, surged in her throat and coasted for the tip of her tongue.

It promptly died a split second later.  Silently, because a second voice called out from within and took its place.  Torturously, because that voice - fleetingly curious - was undeniably female.

The acrid tang of betrayal flooded her mouth like an old, unwanted friend. Sydney swallowed it down with effort, gaze shifting from Lucas’ face to the crack of his door and back again.

“Clearly not.” Sydney’s heart lurched with violent awareness of what she’d likely just interrupted. Her traitorous left eye twitched. And then, even though she tried her goddamn best to stop it, the  dark slash of brow above arched with an accusation not to be missed.

Desperately, stubbornly still in love with him, she blinked through a crimson haze. Old her would’ve pushed past the barrier Lucas eradicated with his own body to drag that imposter out by the roots of her no doubt bimbo, bleached blonde hair. New-and-improved her begged for restraint. Only an unsteady, rattling breath and the faintest whisper of reason separated the two from duking it out.

For a moment longer she glared daggers at the woman yet to be seen. Wished her an eternity in the fiery bowels of jilted ex-girlfriend hell. Balled her hands into tight fists and then, with another shuddering sniff, beat back her trigger happy outrage.

The flames of promised destruction fizzled out.  Sydney flicked on a second, notably smaller smile. If only that hid the flash of new wounds in her eyes.

But, bound and determined to be better - whatever the fuck that meant anymore - she abused the inside of her cheek instead of whoever lurked inside, then released a sigh. “But that’s— that’s fine. Really. I only came by to drop these off.” Previously forgotten about, Syd gave the Tupperware in her clutches a lukewarm shake. 

“I had a shift yesterday and you usually don’t do much to celebrate so—” Glancing again to his door, she shrugged through uncomfortable acceptance. “I figured we could share the spoils of an Erin Fitzpatrick fridge raid.” He didn’t need to know she still worn her work clothes because she’d chose to quickly bake a batch of their cookies to go with it over changing. Sydney gnawed at her lower lip before finding Lucas’ gaze. “I didn’t know you had company, though, so you should just— share with them instead.” 

God, how it killed her to say that. No amount of mental pats on the back for ‘good behavior’ could ever make those words feel right.

-

It was becoming very clear to Lucas that perhaps he should have anticipated this surprise visit from Sydney. Lately things between them had been slowly coming back together, like pieces of a broken mirror finally removed from scatter to provide a distorted image, but an image of something was better than nothing, to that they both could attest to. Lucas hated to think that their progress could come to a halt over something so silly –– perhaps not silly per se, but something so not what it actually was.

As much as Lucas wanted to explain things, the subject matter seemed far too personal to even begin. Family had always been a sacred subject, one that might have seemed like pulling teeth in the past when brought up, but had since been one that came with a certain level of joy he wasn’t quite used to. After all, Lucas took his mother’s presence as good news –– as a light at the end of a very dark tunnel that had been his life the last decade. How Sydney would take it would probably be a stark contrast. Still, despite that, Lucas took the Tupperware that was still warm and tried to search for the words to ease whatever grossly incorrect thoughts were probably coming to Sydney’s mind.

However, before he could mutter a word, his mother, true to form seemed to be ease dropping and once she heard a familiar name, she couldn’t help but pull the door open wider to offer her sentiments, “Is Erin Fitzpatrick still making dry stuffing, I bet she is” Josephine chimed in, despite the slight snub of her words, there was a kindness in her voice and a faint smile to match that made it somehow feel like a compliment. She hadn’t known the Fitzpatrick family all that well, back then they had only spent time together once in awhile when John invited his friends from the auto shop to watch football at the house. “Are you the dog sitter, honey?” She added shortly thereafter once she noticed the way Harley came through the door to wag her tail. 

Deciding it was best he say something before Sydney did, Lucas was quick to correct his mother, “She’s not the sitter. She’s... a friend. A customer from the shop” It seemed like a lie. After all, he and Sydney had never been friends. Sure, they danced around this new world where they had dinner together, made each other laugh, and apparently bring each other leftovers for the holidays, but they had never actually been friends. It always seemed like something more than that, even now. As Josephine busied herself by grabbing the Tupperware from Lucas’s hands and hurrying into the kitchen to put it away in the fridge, Lucas let out a soft sigh as he tried to make things a little easier to understand, “My mom’s in town, you don’t gotta stick around...” Just as he was getting the words out, a voice from the kitchen hummed out, “Don’t be rude, invite your friend inside, she might want to look at your new work.” The new work that was still scattered across his coffee table. 

Reluctantly, Lucas stepped out of the doorframe, “Or come in if you want, I guess” He said, unable to shoo her away so easily now.