Samalie Prom

It was a crush. It was a simple and unexpected crush. I never would have guessed that this was going to happen, but that’s what crushes are, right? You never see them coming and all of the sudden it hits you square in the face and by then, there’s nothing you can do about it. You either pursue your crush, make yourself get over it, or you continuously tell yourself that it’s nothing. I wish I had a choice when it comes to my crushes. When I crush, I crush hard. There’s always something that happened that makes me always want more. Sadly though, not once have me and my crush ever gotten together. Not. A. Single, Time. But I was with someone for a good 4 months before we had to call it off due to distance. I didn’t crush on him before we started dating. He took me to a dance and then he pursued me and I fell for him. We were good. But there wasn’t that instant connection that I had with so many others before him. Now? Now, I’m crushing on someone else. He’s someone I want to be with. He’s someone I want to spend all my time with. Here’s the catch tho… he’s talking to his ex again. Pretty sure they’ll be back together officially real soon here so why am I crushing on someone who is almost taken? idk. I have no freaking idea. Why am I putting myself through this kind of misery? Because when I’m with him, everything seems to fade. We connect. We’re like one person. We’re always on the same page and we’re constantly together. Us being more than friends is always an option because I feel like what we have isn’t just felt by me. But am I going to try and get over this? damn right. Is it going to be easy? hell no. But you know what? I’m sick of letting my crushes, crush me. 

words from the soul (via dontsurvivelive)

It’s nights like these where you’re all I ever think about. When you’re always on my mind and all I can do is wonder about all of our what ifs. What if I never left? Would we still be happy? What if we tried harder at fighting the distance? Would we still be together? What if we met sooner? Would we be stronger? There are so many questions running around my head and I don’t have any answers. I don’t know. I don’t know the answers and I wonder… do you? Was it easy for you to move on and find someone else? I know you have someone in your life now. Someone who replaced me once I was gone. Someone that makes you happy. But as happy as I made you? That’s the question now isn’t it? I miss us. I miss what we had when the future was promising and all I could see was us. Our future. A life where I would be happy and around my family. But it would also be a life where I never would have met the people I’ve met in Wyoming. The same people that I could also see a future with. People that I believe will be a part of my life for a long time. I wonder which life I would be happiest. I always say, “everything has changed, yet I am more me than I’ve ever been.” I believe that 100%. I love who I am and who I’ve become, but I wonder… who would I be if I stayed behind? I know I definitely wouldn’t be who I am now. I wouldn’t be the strong and open minded woman I’ve become. My eyes have been opened to so many different things and I’m happy. Do you think I could’ve been happier with you? Would I be content and loving my life? Or would I be regretting my decision to not leave? I’m not gonna lie, you made me happy. Very happy actually. You made me feel as though I was beautiful and that I was worth it. But then you didn’t fight for me and all of that left. It disappeared along with the promising future I had envisioned for us. I told you my options and that the opportunity to play golf at the next level was now an option and you acted like you were happy for me, when in reality you didn’t want me to leave. I could see it in your eyes and hear it in your voice. You continue to say how proud of me you are, but I can see it in your eyes. You didn’t want me to leave. You didn’t want me to risk what we had, but you also didn’t want to be the reason I turned down such a big opportunity. You were trying to do the right thing, but you didn’t know that you were slowly breaking my heart. You began to distance yourself and that hurt me. I thought we could’ve fought the distance and gone far together, but you never gave us that option. And it hurts to think about because I was ready to give myself to you. I was ready to fight for us, but there wasn’t going to be an “us” if I was the only one trying. It stung when we broke things off, but I knew it was for the best. I began to have more fun in college and my eyes opened to all of the possibilities. I met someone after we broke up. He was everything to me. We could’ve been a hit, but a few months into thinking that we could seriously be the power couple, I was cut out of his life for a week. That one hurt too. We’re just friends now. And I guess I’m okay with that, but I wonder with him too. I wonder what we could’ve been if he wouldn’t have cut me out. We could’ve been good. You and I could’ve been great, but you never gave us that chance and it broke my heart. So now I’m just laying here… wondering, “what if.”

i can assure you, it’s been too long since you’ve seen this masterpiece !

REBLOG FOR GOOD JOB GETTING KARMA COME ON GRAB A PIECE

My Brain, lounging on a lawn chair with shades on: ….acknowledged

me: i am irredeemable worthless garbage and i want to die

Bottle rocket under ice

ALSO! the bottle rocket stays lit because the fuse was definitely waterproof and made with magnesium and an oxidizer of some sort. this means that they will burn underwater because they dont need the oxygen from the air to stay lit. thats so fucking weird isnt it. im tipsy and its the 4th of july. sorry for the science haha

Hira (via hedonistpoet)

diaryofasocialintrovert (via diaryofasocialintrovert)