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just wanted to clarify about this post in case people don’t read the responses.

1) wow this is a cruel response!

2) i was talking about my anxiety and my work (job) making me feel bad about myself

3) i was talking about how some of my friends do not support me when i want to talk about how i’m having a difficult time. instead they say “just go to a therapist”. (btw, i have gone to therapy. i have tried numerous antidepressants. i have been proactive in seeking help from professionals, especially recently)

being honest about lacking the background to help friends with suicidal thoughts? 100% agree.

humans are social creatures. therapy can only do so much. friendship is fundamental to survival.

just wanted to clarify about this post in case people don’t read the responses.

1) wow this is a cruel response!

2) i was talking about my anxiety and my work (job) making me feel bad about myself

3) i was talking about how some of my friends do not support me when i want to talk about how i’m having a difficult time. instead they say “just go to a therapist”. (btw, i have gone to therapy. i have tried numerous antidepressants. i have been proactive in seeking help from professionals, especially recently)

being honest about lacking the background to help friends with suicidal thoughts? 100% agree.

when u push them with ur foot and they make the “mmph” noise before they stretch and sit up and blink @ u bc they can’t see yet but then they smile and u both do the little laugh bc ur sleepy bitches

and their hair’s all messed up and their eyes are cloudy and they’re probably wearing clothes 3x too big but it still looks amazing on them

then u both just sit there and their voice is croaky and a little sore and they probably whisper because even though it’s morning it’s quiet and they don’t want to be too loud

I was in middle school when I realized I wasn’t straight. I told close friends and family that I was bisexual. From the start, many people said “Are you sure?” and “I don’t think you are. You will probably grow out of it.” For a year of high school, they “convinced” me I was straight - or at least, I told them they were right. 

Late high school, I met the first person I ever fell in love with. I came out again as bisexual. This time people believed me, because I was dating a girl. 

My identity as bisexual didn’t sit well with my girlfriend, however. She told me repeatedly how she thought I was going to cheat on her with a boy. After awhile, I decided to tell her - and everyone else - that I was lesbian. She had peace of mind that I wouldn’t cheat on her, though I’d never planned on cheating on her with anyone in the first place. 

Even after we broke up, I continued to identify as lesbian. I was afraid that if I again called myself bisexual, that people wouldn’t believe me - similar to the reactions when I first came out.

i’ve spent 85% of nights sober since the beginning of 2018. prior to that, i was drinking daily - probably for about 4-5 years. drinking to the point of browning or blacking out. life was a blur. every day was the same.

i decided that i don’t want to live like that anymore. i was depressed and anxious constantly. so i stopped drinking with the help of some prescription meds. i still have anxiety and depression but i think i’m heading in the right direction.

things i’ve begun doing or have accomplished due to my sobriety:

- working out multiple days a week. i can already feel my body getting stronger, though i haven’t lost any weight. definitely starting to gain muscle though.

- self care routine that includes showering, face mask, moisturizing with cocoa butter from the neck down, facial wrinkle cream (since i’m getting old! 26 already), and aquaphor for the lips because i’m always chapped!

- redecorated my room into an environment that makes me feel calm. wall tapestries that remind me of my connection to the universe, fake plant decorations that remind me of my connection to the earth, stones and crystals that are beautiful and put good energy into my room, fairy lights for a nice dim lighting, salt rock lamps

- got a weighted blanket (20lb) that is so comfortable and helps with my anxiety

- i clean my cats litter box on a regular basis

- i take multiple vitamins and supplements since i have previously been diagnosed with a nutritional deficiency - likely due to my drinking and poor diet

every day is still a struggle. i have to make a conscious effort not to drink. i don’t plan on being sober 100% of the time - id still like to drink in social settings - so for the most part i’m happy with my progress. i still know that alcohol has affected my life very deeply and in some ways possibly irreparably. my best friend even now says she doesn’t want to be around me when i’m drunk. and it hurt a lot but i have to accept the consequences of my substance abuse.

but reflecting on the things i’ve been able to do, i want to keep going and keep healing.

- find a therapist and have regular therapy sessions to gain tools to address my anxiety

- begin incorporating more highly nutritious food into my diet

- find a hobby. maybe pick up bass again