Sage and Synergy

You try eggs for the first time ever. You LOVE them. You’re obsessed with them. Then someone says, “You have to eat eggs everyday now for the rest of your life”. For the first few months it’s great, eggs are enjoyable, but then after about 6 months or so you start to get over eggs. You’ve tried them a million different ways by now and nothing seems that great anymore. That fantastical feeling you had in your mouth the first time you tried eggs is now gone. How do you get it back? I suppose the real question is… How does one love eggs forever? 

If you haven’t noticed by now, “eggs” are a metaphor for relationships. People don’t realize that relationships take work. Effort. Every relationship is FANTASTIC in the beginning; even the first few months. Then, as time passes, people start to get used to one another and that so called “Magical” feeling you had in the beginning, starts to wane. So, how, in fact, does one love eggs forever?  

Here’s some insight: I used to be the kind of person who would date someone for a few months and then get over them. Become bored. Want something new. I was addicted to the butterflies. This is the first relationship where I can honestly say that I am just as in love now as I was in the beginning. Here’s the difference: The start. The start of this relationship wasn’t built on lust or anything superficial. If you start your relationship in a shallow place, you will end up getting tired of it very quickly. Maybe it was based on looks or something else, and that gets old really quickly. You will feel it. 

If you find yourself getting bored or disinterested in a person in a matter of months then I can clearly tell you that the relationship wasn’t built on true love. 

So how does one know it’s love VS. lust? Truthfully, only time will tell. As time passes you won’t grow sick of the eggs, you’ll fall MORE in love with them. You’ll start noticing new things about eggs you never noticed before, and it’ll make them even more beautiful in your eyes. You’ll want to incorporate the eggs into every aspect of your life. You’ll share your love of eggs with everyone around you. Eggs will never seem old, or boring, or annoying to you. They will change and grow with you. You’ll want to help eggs become better, and you won’t be able to imagine a life without them. And when you feel that way, that my friends, is how you know it’s true love. 

Here’s to you finding you egg. 

Love, 

I am risking nothing

I AM SORRY FOLLOWERS, I LOVE MY MOMMY

Will not risk.

Life is like standing in the ocean: it can be a great deal of fun but sometimes it’s too cold and the waves are too rough and you’d rather just retreat to shore. The only difference between life and the ocean is that there is no shore in life. You have to deal with the relentless pounding waves and figure out how to survive them.

I get tired a lot. Tired of trying to figure out what to do next. Tired of trying to keep up with all of the technology and all of the people and all of their apps. Then I realize I’m letting myself get beaten down by the waves of life. And instead of embracing them and riding them, I’m fighting them.

Social media is great because it’s allowed me to get to do what I love for a living but it’s also a curse because we often spend so much time looking at other peoples’lives that we forget to live our own. We look at these posts and see everyone’s “highlight reels” and assume that their lives are so great, when in reality, that’s far from the case.

I get frustrated because I wish people would share what their lives are truly like, and not just all the good stuff. Because that’s not life. Life is full of ups and downs and all arounds. Not just bliss every day. Not just constant vacations or bikini shots or you smiling with food. People often forget that.

I have so many young girls who write to me everyday saying they feel like shit; that they’re not pretty enough, or that they’re not good enough, or that they have no talent and feel worthless. Well guess what? Most people feel just as shit as you do. The reason why most people feel this way is because they don’t see the truth behind these posts. Behind every forced smile is a story very similar to yours. A person who wants to be loved and accepted just like you do.

People post on Instagram to show off, be liked, share their life with friends, model an outfit, get paid, spread a cause, etc. But at the root of it all, is a societal desire to be accepted and adored. And that’s everyone. Everyone wants to be the center of their own world.

My fiancé often tells me to put my phone down and be present. He’s right. I really should do that more, and I try, but I fail miserably most of the time. Did you guys know that most people (on the average) pick up their phone and check it 70 to 80 times a day???!!! I mean that’s fucking ridiculous!!! What is wrong with us?!!Why are we like this? I remember a time before cell phones. A time when people walked around without something in their hands at all times and rode their bike to their friends house to go hang out.

It’s crazy to me that I got to see two worlds. And now this world seems like it’s forever. I’m not complaining. I’m no different than most people. But I do think that if we’re going to be on our phones all the time, we should at least be real with one another and stop trying to act like our lives are so perfect. I’m not saying people have to get on their phones and cry, I’m just saying BE REAL. Share your good days, share your bad days, share your failures, share your successes. I think if we were more real with one another, it’d help us all be there for one another… And those are just my thoughts…

“ Life is just one endless feed, scrolling to nowhere”- Tommy Lee

Scroll on,

Xoxo

I find so often that women (especially friends of mine) will be in these very toxic relationships and yet feel so stuck and so in “love” with these people who are truly only hurting them.

I have been in a toxic relationship before and I know it’s hard to see your way out of it. Everyone told me how bad it was but I thought I loved the person and that they would change. I am here to remind you of what you deserve and if you aren’t getting those things, then you need to pull yourself up by the bootstraps and move on.

What you deserve:

1. You deserve to be loved

Properly and unabashedly. Someone who tells you at least a few times a week that they love you, if not every day. Someone who makes gestures of love, whether it’s remembering little things you said, or the way you like your coffee or breakfast in bed. Love is a verb not a noun. If someone’s not SHOWING you they love you, then they probably don’t.

2. You deserve to be cared for

Whether emotionally or physically, you should be with someone who takes care of you in times of need. Whether it’s bringing you soup when you’re sick or comforting you through hard times. Your partner should be someone who is there for you when you need them.

3. You deserve to be respected

I’ve seen girls stay with guys who treat them like utter trash and it’s insane. They flirt with other girls, cheat on them, lie to them constantly and still these girls take them back. This is not respect and this is not love. I know it hurts but fool me once shame on you, fool me 75 times after that…girl wtf are you thinking?

4. You deserve to be able to you

I see girls with guys who tell them what to wear, who to be friends with, who they can and cannot talk to you. This is ridiculous. A person should be free to express who they are and be friends with who they want and if someone has a problem with that then Buh bye! 👋🏼

5. You deserve peace

People stay in these relationships where they’re constantly arguing or bickering with their partner. This isn’t healthy and this certainly isn’t the best use of your time on this precious planet. You deserve peace. You deserve to be with someone who brings out the best in you… not the worst.

6. You deserve to not settle

A lot of people get married and then end up getting divorced because they compromised on things that they ended up not being so happy with in the end. I’ve seen people get married and say things like, “Well, he is argumentative but no one’s ever treated me so well”. Or “She’s the best I’m going to get”. You’re settling. Don’t settle. I understand no one is going to be perfect but if there are significant things that make you unhappy then you need to know your worth and move on.

7. You deserve to be worshipped

I’m not saying he has to throw petals of flowers on the ground as you walk, but for the first time in my life I’m in a relationship where I am worshipped. And it’s an incredible feeling. He values me, he respects me, and he makes me feel like the most beautiful woman in the world. On days when I feel ugly, or insecure, he reassures me how beautiful he thinks I am and how in love with me he is. And I think EVERY woman deserves to feel that worship.

8. You deserve to be treated

I know these girls who work their asses off while their boyfriends chill at home. The boyfriends never take them to dinner, don’t ever surprise them or show their gratitude. You deserve fun dates and to be treated. And not all dates have to cost money! He could pack a lunch and take you to the park for a picnic. You deserve to be treated like a queen.

9. You deserve balance

One person should not be making all of the effort in a relationship. Both people should come to the relationship with mutual effort and mutual love. I know there will be days where it feels like one person loves the other person more, but it shouldn’t be like that all the time. Both parties are responsible for showing up and putting in their best foot forward to make things lovely for the two of you.

10. You deserve happiness

If you aren’t happy then what else can I say? If you find yourself crying more than laughing, frowning more than smiling and fighting more than loving then maybe this isn’t the right situation for you. Actually I’m not going to sugar coat it, it’s not the right situation for you. You deserve happiness. We are only on this earth for a brief time and you deserve to spend that time with someone who brings you joy. Know your worth!!!!

I hope this list helps you to see what you deserve in life. And yes there are caveats: You can’t treat your partner like complete shit and expect to be worshipped in return. You both have to do your best to make things nice and warm and lovely.

With that said, if you are in a relationship where you aren’t being treated well, I’m sending you all my love and encouragement to move on. I know it’s hard and I know you think you’re never going to love anyone else but I PROMISE you will. I promise you won’t hurt forever and I promise when you find that right person, they will hug all of your broken pieces back together.

Stay strong warrior princess ✊🏼❤️