someone get me an ambulance because i can't stop thinking about claire
fleabag does an amazing job at portraying the struggles of an older sister in a dysfunctional family. also, her being trapped in a complicated marriage while being pulled by both her sister and her husband is a very important detail among Claire's arc about gaining self autonomy. Usually said altercation between her husband, her family, are tied to the idea that she has to pull herself together in order to maintain (at least) some order in the family. She also gained the very poor idea that she is tied to her husband, even if she has mentioned her own achievements, she believes that, in the end, it won't matter as long as Martin is in her life.
And he is not making her laugh anymore. He doesn't know her. She is complicated, yes, but he settles for just throwing jokes at her, instead of trying to understand Claire.
martin wants the stability that she brings, the selfish want of, not possessing her, exactly, but her staying at her side. his way of loving her is putting the lowest effort, not so much as to being completely incompetent, but sure enough to make her stay.
"I make you laugh! you said that was the most important thing!" for claire, for so long, it was.
fleabag just wants her sister. she wants her sister to laugh, and to do what she wants to do. go to Finland, get rich, enjoy her life.
Claire's laughing was her relief. She knew she wasn't funny like her mother. But maybe she can remember, just a sliver of how she made her feel, when Claire clutched her sides and her cheeks hurt so much by how painfully she laughed. It was so amazing, it hurt.
Fleabag is her sister, and Claire cares so much about her, because in all the loneliness that may darken her life, sometimes, it's better to be with her sister. And the only person who reads Claire so well. The only person who can peer into her layers, who will run to her after a fight, and console her. They both only have each other, they've tried reach for one another but they are always late.
Claire goes from a cycle of loneliness, self-hatred and the forced wife-box that Martin had forced her in, and slowly, but surely, decided that she will go and love herself. She deserves it. She can be messy, and complicated and irresponsible too, she can love and be loved and cut her hair and tell her sister that she is the only person who Claire would run to the airport for.
She has herself, and that's good. She finally, has herself.
snowghoul
gamechangershow
gracieabrams
vaporwave
yousharknotpass
s-u-f-j-a-n-s-t-e-v-e-n-s
