* what's wrong with me !

Like most important dates usually did, Anni felt as though the wedding had snuck up on them--but certainly not in a bad way. Honestly, perhaps if they weren't so married to the aesthetic (pun very much intended), they would've already marched down to the courthouse and tied the knot--they were quite anxious to officially and lovingly refer to the other as their wife. That being said, she could appreciate all of the hard work and dedication that Hermione had put in to making their special day just right. Anni had personally choreographed their dance and they'd been spending time in the studio once a week practicing. She knew that her lover was a bit worried about being up to the task of dancing so she'd promised that she'd do all the work on that end--all Hermione had to do was a simple foxtrot (which sounded much more complicated than it actually was) and look beautiful, which was quite an easy feat for them. Anni had promised to handle all of the spins and step-outs and everything else. While couple dancing certainly wasn't her forte, she'd taken what she'd learned from her years and years of ballet and was no applying it to one of the most memorable dances she'd ever do. There was also the question about first dances, though she wasn't sure how to go about that just yet. Personally, she wanted to share a dance with her mother, but not if Hermione didn't want to dance with someone equally important to them. The last thing she wanted was to remind her wife-to-be of their family's absence. Though it was certainly not the same as having your own family there, Anni did hope that her fiancé felt embraced and welcomed by the large Adler family. They could be a found family, a chosen family of sorts--at least, that's how she hoped Hermione viewed it.

The menu was very important and thankfully, this sort of conversation didn't make her feel nearly as anxious as it might have a few years ago. Still, she knew that her fiancé could be a bit picky, as well as a tad bougie, so it was important that they picked something that they both liked but was also appealing to their guests. Smiling, she said "We can absolutely seafood--what were you thinking?" To be fair, something like lobster might be a little expensive... Then again, if they had their guests order their food ahead of time, they could know exactly how much they needed. "I don't think anyone in my family is allergic to seafood--at least, I'm pretty sure they're not. But we should provide a non-seafood option, just in case one of our guests is allergic to seafood, or even if they just don't like it. Not everyone can have as classy taste as you, love," she said with a light chuckle, playfully teasing of course. "Maybe something like chicken? But that doesn't mean that we'd have to eat it. We can eat whatever we want--we are the brides, after all," she smiled. God, she loved the sound of that. Though she hoped no one else at their wedding would have to deal with anxiety around food, she knew what it felt like to panic about food, especially when one's options were limited. Chicken was a good neutral, she thought.

dancing was always an art that fascinated hermione, though they knew all their grace and elegance was in their performance as an actress. as a child, they attended a handful of ballet classes, finding it the most beautiful and intriguing form of dance, but it didn't stick as much as acting had. they much preferred a theatre where they could use their body language in more subtle ways to convey their emotions. that being said, they adored watching anni perform. there was scarcely anything more enchanting in the world than witnessing their love so submersed in her craft. so, when the idea of a couples dance was proposed, hermione wasn't reluctant whatsoever—a little nervous, of course, considering it wasn't something they were as in-tune with, but they figured it couldn't be as difficult as the contortionist work they did in the circus as a teenager. they were well-accustomed to stretching their body in a myriad of absurd positions, so a foxtrot couldn't be too demanding, even if it had intimidated them a bit. what truly concerned them was making a mistake and disappointing anni, even if it wasn't likely. they hadn't thought anni felt that way towards them once their whole relationship. really, it'd all gone so smoothly it was almost unsettling. it was a blessing, to be sure. they often thought of what their mother and father would think of anni; in all honesty, they believed they would both adore her, despite the fact their love and adoration had been sullied by her father's accident that rendered him quadriplegic and her mother's response that made her intolerant of hermione and embittered toward the world. as they aged, they blamed them both less and less, but thinking about how neither of them would be present on the most important day of their life did sting.

they still hadn't figured out who would be escorting them down the aisle or dancing with them at the reception. they had their pick of the litter with any of the adlers, which they were beyond grateful for. if not for them, they would be completely alone, something they once thought they were okay with before they met anni and realized how isolating it all was. they had plenty of friends, but no one to share their life with, which was the only thing they dreamed of from the time they were little. they knew they'd figure it out eventually—they always did, it was their specialty. it's why they hadn't trusted anyone else with the responsibility of wedding planning, minus anni, of course, whose input superseded all others. they were very adept at finding a way, as they had been since they first left home at fourteen. "i would love a lobster bisque for certain, perhaps some oyster and calamari as well. i'm also not opposed to splurging on some caviar. it's an acquired taste, but, well, it's our wedding," laughter blossomed from their chest, which felt tighter nowadays that they were so preoccupied by wedding planning. admittedly, it'd impacted their blood pressure, but they wouldn't complain. what a wonderful thing to stress over. "chicken, yes. that's brilliant. baked, perhaps. with simple seasonings, as not to offend anyone's palette. and plenty of roasted vegetables to go with it." the more they advanced in planning, the easier they could breathe, though they were still far from completing their journey to becoming wives. but it would all be worth it, hermione had known that from the beginning.

location: hermione and anni's home in stargazer villas

@prettysads

Now that it was summer, Hermione and Anni had dove headfirst into wedding planning, with the clock ticking down in the back of both of their minds. While it was certainly enjoyable, the process was also a bit stressful and the dancer wanted to do whatever she could to ease her fiancé's stress. After all, this was going to be one of the happiest days of their lives (no pressure) and she knew that however it turned out, it would be perfect because she'd get to marry her person.

ever since their magical engagement, all hermione had in the forefront of their mind was wedding planning. a stringent type a person, they were hellbent on this being the biggest event of the millennium—even if they were still three years off. collecting books, magazines, and old vision boards from their teen years had become paramount in their organization process. all over their perfect pink apartment were scatterings of torn out and crumpled up papers; sketches for their wedding dress, which they were planning on ethically sourcing from a small business and customizing to fit their personal taste; scribblings of the dinner and dessert menus; and sketches of what the bouquets made by say say's delicate hand would look like. with a little over a month left, hermione didn't let anything else impede their train of thought. this was the most important day of their lives, so, naturally, they were wholeheartedly dedicated to making it flawless.

She couldn't help but let out a giggle when Mione confirmed that in fact, Say Say had apparently known all along--though, it didn't surprise her. Say Say was excellent at keeping secrets, and not in any sort of bad way but in the best way. After all, that's why if one ever wanted to plan a surprise party for one of their siblings--or any party, really--one should go to Dalisay. "Well, you two did an excellent job," she said, beaming down at her gorgeous ring. "It's perfect." Once again looking at her fiancé, she smiled and said "It's just all so perfect." As much as she wanted to call her family, it was pretty late and Hermione made a good point--this was their private time as a couple, before things got all hectic and chaotic. This was their time to share and frankly, Anni intended on using every last bit of it to her benefit. "Then you've got it--whatever you want. We'll call them after breakfast." Leading her into the bedroom, she lead Mione to the bed and motioned for them to take a seat. Leaning down to whisper in their ear, she smiled and said "I will be right back..."

hermione would be eternally indebted to the adlers for being so welcoming and offering their unconditional love toward them. after leaving the fragments that remained of their own behind, it was all they could've asked for from their new life in nevada. while they had desperately missed their mother and bibi, it was made abundantly clear that, after their father's death, their role in the family had been supplanted by grief and despair. "thank you very much. i think it suits you perfectly—though, nothing could truly outdo your own beauty," they gushed, beyond grateful at the reception of the engagement, something she returned wholeheartedly after being proposed to in return. in all honesty, they hadn't anticipated it; they were content with being the one to take the initiative, but the fact that anni had the same thought in mind only further reassured them that this was meant to be. "perfect." whenever anni's sweet voice whispered in their ear, they could feel an excited shiver course up their spine. watching her leave, hermione could hardly keep themselves from shaking their hands out and squeezing them in their overflowing excitement. could this day get any better?

When Ava looked at Nadine, she didn't see her girlfriend the way that the public at large might have: as a former music industry darling, retreating from the limelight here in the desert. If anything, over the last few years of their blossoming relationship, the blonde had come to see the totality of what made Dina so special. The biker was kind, patient, creative, unapologetic. She was one of the most brilliant and loving people that Ava ever had the pleasure of knowing (let alone loving), unwilling to take shit from anyone—a quality that Ava herself flirted with in years past, that had only been emboldened since meeting her beloved. Every day in Nadine's presence felt like a gift, with surprises around every corner that just made the young Adler grateful for everything she had been through leading up to their fateful meeting. If wading through the utter bullshit that passed for a love life was the thing that ultimately led her to the gorgeous raven-haired girl's door, then it had all been worth it. She would gladly be the Gomez to her Morticia, always.

Clasping onto her girlfriend's hands with a fierceness that had become all too natural for the two, she smiled softly at Dina. "Aww, you're too good to me, sweets. You've also been working hard. You need a night off this week too... maybe we can take a day off together," Ava insisted, giving her lover's hands a gentle, reassuring squeeze. The reflexive urge to downplay the toll that her job occasionally took on her body didn't come from the same place of perpetual insecurity that might have colored her words years ago. Instead, her relationship had ushered in a selfless love for her partner that Ava had never experienced in earnest before. She didn't do things to make Dina's life easier because she felt she had to, to get the other to stay. On the contrary, Nadine's comfort and happiness was just as important as her own, even despite the blonde's reputation for adoring the princess treatment that her girlfriend freely and frequently bestowed upon her. But when Nadine sobered, sweet sentimentalities over their relationship falling like honey from her lips, Ava felt her heartbeat quicken—not out of anxiety or a distant fear of abandonment, but out of a growing excitement and adoration for her girlfriend that could hardly be contained by her body.

Her hands shook from between Dina's fingers, her cheeks flushed with every declaration of Nadine's undying devotion and gratitude for the relationship they'd built together. Before she could fully process the warmth of her lover's words, like crushed velvet against her skin, tears started to pool at the edges of her vision. Ava let out a breathy laugh, all at once annoyed with herself for daring to obscure such a wonderful sight and elated to hear the words coming from her girlfriend's mouth. Her stomach performed a death-defying swoop at the sight of the velvet box, breath hitching at the sight of the ring held within it—beautiful and so perfect for her. The words following pinned her in place, as if time outside of their trailer stilled... just for them.

Ava Jeanette Adler, will you marry me?

that was one of the countless reasons nadine was more than willing to pledge her existence to ava: she hadn't seen her the way the rest of the world did. this larger than life, untouchable musical powerhouse; with ava, she was simply dina, and she didn't have to live up to any unreasonable expectations the way she did when she was at the height of her fame. while she would always appreciate and value the time she was given in the stratosphere, she much preferred living and breathing in the same space as the blonde and soaking up every bit of their quiet life together. she had lived through her childhood dreams, but now was the time for her true aspirations to shine. she wanted what most normal people did—a wife, children, a little trailer on the edge of the park that they shared residence with alongside their family. while she was looking forward to relishing in married life before pursuing the idea of adoption or fertility treatments, she couldn't deny the immeasurable excitement she felt at the idea of having a clutch of adler-zhangs to adore just as much as she had their mother. she assumed that would be a conversation that would take place post-honeymoon, which she was already eagerly awaiting. there was nothing more in the world nadine craved than to spend time completely alone with ava. as much as they adored the other adlers, she couldn't recall a time where they were truly isolated with no distractions within a two hundred foot radius.

the tight hand hold had steadied and grounded nadine, who returned the squeeze heartily as a means of furthering her calmness in an attempt to combat the anxiety that couldn't be stifled in her rapidly beating heart. "i'd really like that. god, when was the last time we got to do that?" she asked with breathless laughter, only a tad embarrassed by how quickly the breath was willed out of her lungs by ava's mere presence. it was never something she'd be accustomed to; while ava had always made her feel at home, there would forever be this angelic element that stole her breath away every time they shared a space. as she balanced the velvet box in her hand, she eyed ava's expression, feeling a rush of relief flood her veins whenever the other's face displayed what she had hoped was a positive reception to the gesture. in truth, she hadn't anticipated this to go south, but there would be a persistent doubt that followed her all throughout life, telling her that this was all an elaborate dream she would wake up to at any moment. her worst fear was that eventually, she would reawaken in a hotel room in los angeles, awaiting an arena show that would render her lifeless by its end. but, with ava, she was slowly coming to realize that day would never arrive. slowly but surely, she was assured that everything would remain as it was, and with this question, it would be written in the stars with a far brighter pen than the one she used to sign her name on ndas that benefited everyone except herself.

instinctive tears formed on her waterline as she observed ava marveling at the ring. she had spent weeks agonizing over which one would suit her girlfriend the most, consulting with her future sisters-in-law and mother-in-law until she had ultimately landed on what she thought was a piece of jewelry that encapsulated ava's essence brilliantly. in return, all she had expected was a vibrant and eager yes!, which she was beginning to anticipate upon seeing the flashes of joy and surprise in the other's magnificent features. she did her damnedest to keep the box steady between them, trying to disguise her nerves even though she could still feel her wrist begin shaking beneath the small weight the box possessed.

PERHAPS IT WAS STILL A BIT TOO SOON to party what with all that had already happened in the year and it barely being halfway into it: multiple family members were deceased and the entire hierarchy of the family had now been shifted around again. (Quite honestly, if it wasn't so sad, it would almost be laughable how they were all arguing for that exact reason not long ago. If they had only knew what was on the horizon, Meera would have liked to think they would have all treated one another with more grace, as deserved.) But the heiress had been hiding away from the public for long enough, and were she to give herself the excuse, she feared she would just keep trying to do so forever. Why she chose such an event as the current to make such a change with was...still beyond her, but she chalked it up to hoping everyone would be a little too intoxicated to notice if she had had enough and decided to slip away back home. "Kineret, that clown is not messing with you," she reassured kindly with confidence, though when her gaze followed where the younger Vitelli's was locked onto, her nose gave a small twitch, and she wondered if she should have instead swallowed those words. Normally, she was ready to attribute such a comment to Kenny's dramatics, but this time, she wasn't so sure. "On second thought, I don't believe I quite like the look of him, either. Not that being in the splash zone for that suggestion sounds any more appealing. Why don't we find some water to help with your nausea? Or what about-" Her fingers snapped in front of her, searching for the word. "One of those frozen drinks? I thought I had seen people walking around with all sorts of colors of them. That may help you more than being shaken up on a bull. Besides, those seem quite dangerous, and...our luck has already been poor enough."

The fortune teller made herself useful whilst Dalisay indulged her with additional information about herself. Pleasantries that might be considered profoundly useless by many, but mattered to her — people came to the Trance with questions ranging from the norm ( love, fame, money, as avarice for that which couldn't be forced ran deep ) to the most frivolous and subtle. All could be answered by the deck of cards that she was working with nimble fingers to shuffle in her hands. "Tell me more about the premonitions that you see in your dreams. I think that everyone has that spark, you know, the little... inklings to things, we aren't always aware of them or able to grasp onto them. Some people don't have that shine, or they ignore it." Falling silent to listen to the other's elaboration, they nodded as they continued to shuffle the cards, humming, before elaborating in return, "Dark clouds... That's ominous, but to me, it tells me you are dealing with an inner conflict. Has there been anything to disturb your peace of mind, of late?" Naturally, most of what dreams manifested as were a manner of the brain processing events and feelings, trying to work through them in its subconscious state; looking at the client directly, Salem couldn't descry from the superficial what could be amiss, as she hardly showed up to their corner of the mall with red, puffy eyes, or an erratic disposition.

always an obedient and attentive listener, say say had felt unnaturally compelled to remain quiet and allow for the fortune teller to speak for as long and with as much detail as need be. she had her legs crossed, hands folded in her lap as she carded her fingers together, this old nervous habit that once rubbed the flesh in the gaps raw. whenever her mindscape began deteriorating, she often relapsed into these unhealthy coping mechanisms. she could vividly remember tulip's father constantly reaching for her hands and opening them up so he could squeeze them instead. blinking away the memory, she cleared her throat upon being asked a question. "i've always had them, ever since i was a little girl. sometimes they're vivid, other times not so much. it's hard to describe—they're more abstract than anything, but the other week, i had dreamt in all white, in a world full of flowers, and diamonds glittering in the sky. then, the next day, my sister anni got engaged. it's something like that every time. i've gotten better at deciphering them over the years, but... i figure it's best to get a second opinion from someone like-minded," she explained, swallowing the air bubble that caught in her throat. "there has been, yes. i have schizophrenia, and it comes and goes in waves. lately, the waves have gotten much more frequent. feels like a tsunami is on the horizon." she gave a chuckle which possessed no warmth or confidence. it used to be difficult, disclosing her disability to strangers, but she felt safe already in salem's care.

now that she had them, marisol didn’t think she would be complete without say say and tulip. they brought light and music back into her life, and there was no doubt about it. the second she walked into the apartment for the first time and saw the drawings on the walls, and all of say say’s trinkets,  she knew that the other girl would be someone she stuck by for a long time. it’s strange, knowing that you’re supposed to be with someone from the moment you see them. her grandma always talked about “her meant-to-be”, the person you know is your soulmate, the one made for you. your person. at one point, marisol would have said that she didn’t even believe in love at first sight, that it was something that only existed in rom coms with sidney poitier. but  say say was her meant-to-be, and she wasn’t spending any second of her life without her. they had a steady thing going, but marisol was scared to define it. she worried that if she did, say say would be overwhelmed, and run away. ever since the deaths of her grandma and ms. liza jane, she had this dread in her heart that everyone around her would leave, and she would be all on her own, and she couldn’t have that, so she was going to hold on as tight as she could and not let go. not for a long time.  seeing that grin on say say’s face? that was all she wanted to see every day for the rest of her life. she stepped closer to say say, and tucked the flower behind her ear. “perfect.” she let out a fake groan at the mention of reciprocation. “say… you don’t have to. i’ll escape it, i will. i’ll be like harry houdini in the straitjacket. watch me.” 

The first one in line was a lanky older man with bowboy boots and purple streaks in his dark hair. He seemed to be someone who was eager to get on. To prove something to himself or to prove something to others, his gaze flittered everywhere, never landing on a single person. So maybe just to prove something to himself.

"And while I do like to bet you out of your money, spending it on a guitar doesn't sound to bad," she opted. "Are you any good? Or do you most play for yourself?" She remembered fondly the time when she believed she and her veera were artists, when she thought she could make her own songs and maybe get famous one day.

thoroughly impressed by the unique visage of the man approaching the bull next, ellie took another swig of his drink, a grin pulling like thread through cloth on the corner of his mouth. he hoped he could be that brave when he was that old; and god knew he would be. he could only change so much about himself before he undid his entire personhood entirely, and that had never worked out for him before.

"y'know what, thank you for saying that. my siblings would probably smack me over the head with a newspaper for even entertaining the idea," he said, seeming truly appreciative at her words. whenever he was inquired about his skill, he was eager to boast. "i like to think i'm pretty good. i've been playing since i was eleven, so. i've got a lot of practice in over the last twenty years. not in a band or anything—i guess i do play for myself most of the time," he felt the need to return the curiosity as the older man mounted the bull. "what about you? what do you get up to when not betting on old men's lives?"

mac lets out another laugh, it seems like laughter was one of the only things mac could really do around kenny vitelli. “if perfect’s a stand in for horrid, then they’re perfect alright,” they say, looking down at the menu. while they could recite the breakfast options at the waffle cottage as easily as they could recite the periodic table thank you jones, they were in the mood for something a little off the beaten path. there were milkshakes that had accoutrements stacking up to the heavens, with things like cookie cakes and full cake slices on top of them. who would even order something like this? let alone make it? just looking up at the pictures sent a shiver up their spine. “sometimes,” they lightly punch kenny on the shoulder. “you’re not the only girl on my mind,” they joke. “exactly. every time i see him, i want to freeze up and run away. it’s actually my biggest regret coming back to haunt me.” there were three things in mckayla’s life that they regretted: leaving sj being the one at the top of the list. they often wondered what would happen if they never left the house that day, but then, would they have the life they have now? with a pseudo-friend in a vitelli, while trying to uncover the various sprawling mysteries of las vegas. “i disagree on the too crunchy part,” they say, waving a fork in the air, “the crunch is the best part. but i do love the softness of pancakes.” listening to kenny talk about her health, mac leaned in, as if they were getting a scoop. “ken.” they chide, pointing the fork at the youngest vitelli, “i’ll take really good care of everything. they’ll act like my child that i didn’t abandon.”

These days, she sings at home and in public, at work (both the club and the hospital), to her dog and to her plants, wherever she pleases. It's garnered her a little fanbase in some parts, and tonight, they cheer loudly and drunkenly for her.

"No way?!" Her jaw drops, a large grin on her face. Sophia squints her eyes in the dim light, trying to put a name to the face beside her. She can't quite place the woman, maybe a newer artist? She'd admit her records were a bit dated, but obviously, she was open to newer tunes. She clicks her tongue, dropping the pen into the middle of the book and deciding this was much more important than singing again. "Oh, uhm... Thanks!" She laughs a bit, arm leaning against the high top table. "I was in choir as a kid, and my best friends mom really, really encouraged me to expand." It's a brief explanation, but it's a fond one. "I bet it would be just like ridin' a bike for you! What kinda performer? Like theater?"

It's not even truly being starstruck, at least, Sophia wouldn't classify it as such. But how often does someone meet another who has the same interest but also happens to be someone of influence in the subject? She counts herself blessed in the moment that they're sharing the space.

but maybe she'd just been out of the game for a while. that was likely it, still, she had no plans on stepping up and picking a song for herself to perform. she was more than glad watching others and beholding new talent rising before her eyes. "yeah, way," she confirmed, laughter punctuating the words as she crossed her arms, a way of blocking herself off so she didn't feel too vulnerable admitting something that was already public knowledge. "choir, that checks out. choir kids are some of the best. you know, they actually turned me down for it when i was in school. took some vocal training for me to be on that level," she continued praising. "oh, no, not theatre. god no. i'm, uh, nadine zhang. dina," on instinct, she offered a hand out in greeting with a crooked smile. "i used to do arena shows and stuff—released an album and all that. it was, uh, pop punk. toured with some other bands. but that was a few years back. i ran out of that life with my tail between my legs a long time ago."

and she hadn't missed it in the slightest. she was at her lowest when she was her most infamous, which had sent her into a spiral of drugs, alcohol, and disordered eating that impacted her already addled-mind for what would be the remaining duration of her natural life. but she'd made peace with that the day she fled los angeles, and now, she wouldn't change a thing if it meant she wound up with the life she was given with ava.