heart full of honey

“I used to think there was no time like the present. I used to think there was no time but the present. Now I know better — or different, anyway. In the end, the past will always be there. The past is all there is: the present never sticks around for long enough, and the future is anybody’s guess. In time, you always have to hand it to the past. It always gets you in the end.”

Sleep left me for a second time, and it was more painful than the first. I wanted that feeling of beginning anew every morning, not the weariness of one long endless life. Sleep was like getting a little taste of death. Life had to be squeezed into the time in between sleeps. The little deaths were important.