*insert cool name here*

*reluctant sigh*

*scrolls back up*

Every few seconds? Move your tongue an inch closer to your players nostrils.

Put a creepy clown on your player's dashboard and blame it on Tumblr

Implement jump scares with flashbangs

Try to gaslight your players into thinking that roleplaying games have never existed and what they're currently playing is a weird hockey match

Write your character sheet but the dots in the "i"s are all skulls.

Dress up in a cape and call yourself "Ebony Von Doomsucker". Ten million V:TM players can't be wrong!

Do your RPGs over the phone.

Start games abruptly, with no warning, in your players bedrooms, in the middle of the night.

Just hurl a dice in the woods for the cryptids to play with.

Do a spooky dance whenever a dice is rolled.

As soon as players sit down, inform them that there's no dice rolling today, instead we're all going to go around the circle and discuss all our deepest insecurities and personal failings.