KING OF THE LOSERS

your the shit stuck in the grooves of my shoe

no matter how much i pry you greasy fingers wrap tighter around my neck

then you shove them down my throat 

im not nervous anymore 

and i have buried all my fear

theres a grave by the sea for you

if marked by the stone i engraved for you

it says its a bed i made for you

but i dont know if you get tired anymore

and i dont think we can talk anymore

i just woke up again

but i think your pretending to sleep

i didnt know you could sleep anymore 

and when faced with a mirror i touch it 

my fingers designed to smudge it 

and when it becomes foggy i wont look at you anymore 

i wont be able to fix my hair anymore

i dont know how you can be here anymore 

i just want to be the first human being 

i want to be above you

the god you pray to

are you still here

are you still listening to me

i want you to open your ears to my gospel 

i want you to see my heaven

i want you to taste my limbo

when i come back will you still be here

will your grave still be here

are you still my painstar

when you burn out will you tell me

i dont want to crash on rocky shores anymore

and i dont want to run my hand under cold water anymore

i never wanted you to be a bear

i just wanted these clothes to fit

and when im done i wont miss you 

so let me stand on your shoulders

life my up into the sky

the pearly white sky

i know that when i reach it im not going to pull you up with me

and i know that will be the best day of your life

you always looked good when the weather was nice

so i will keep the sky clear for you

i will keep the hunters far from you

i will give you what you want 

i will give you what your due

i will watch you eat yourself alive 

and when you hammer in that nail 

ill let it hit 

i am the shameful one for pushing my art on you 

and when i told you about it 

you said not to

i told you it helps me sleep 

you said what does 

how could you not know

how could you not know when i just told you 

i just told you

i just want to hold you

i just want to change or be different 

i just want to be too weak to hold this pen 

and to full to sit in this room

its stuffy in this room

my throat is closing in this room

my limbs itch in this room

my body to big for this room

but at least im heavy and warm

to heavy to hold now

and to feverish to watch now 

a painstar has awaken in my stomach

its carving me out now

i think i lost all my blood now 

and now you can fill my husk with the girl of your dreams 

the man in my dreams looks a lot like you 

but hes not as bright as you

and his lighthouse lets all the boats crash

in the splintering carnage i find a seastar

its now a deadstar 

but your still my painstar

your still my star

and i cant help but look when your on stage

and i cant help but listen to your fabrications

but i cant hear anything else now

i think we should lie down now

because im getting dizzy now

all my joints are rotting now

so feed me something before i sleep tonight

the painstar in my belly eats only your works

i wish you were a bear 

but you would just shoot yourself wouldnt you 

and i bet you would use a golden shotgun

cause your in your golden years 

and my years are just cliched 

i mean your hearts not in it like it used to be

and my arts not cool like it used to be 

so ill use big words you cant understand

you galvanistic thing 

you faradic thing 

your a painstar 

and you kept fogging up the window 

i wish you were in a movie

because bears talk in movies

and your grave would be 2D on screen

your coffin would be 2D

and i couldnt get into it with you 

i mean i never liked dirt much anyways 

and you never liked death 

i wish you would look up

i wish that when you look up you look up for me

i wish that its for me 

i wish that your eyes are always looking for me 

i want your eyes on me

and i liked it better when you didnt talk

you inaudible thing 

you made too much noise 

but i kept listening to you 

and i kept stealing your lines 

but ill pay you back in a week or two 

cause when the sun sets neither of us will have the clover

i mean you were never lucky in life 

and i was just never lucky 

and im too nervous to walk now 

and my hands are too shaky to hold now 

but your hands are fixed like the men in the coffins 

and i think i cut off all my fingers last night 

and it made me think of you

cause you have all your fingers

you have all your fingers and mine are on the floor 

my fingers are on the floor and yours arent 

so wont you make me your idol

but if you do youll have to hold the mic 

i have never seen the day break

i wont see the angels hand 

im only allowed to be awake at night 

wasting time fearing the sun wont understand 

they say ill miss this town when i quit

i guess i never did mind the rain

but now all your faces are eating themselves 

and i dont know if i can get up again 

my fangs stopped growing years ago 

and now i cant eat at all 

so ive lost all my passion and fury 

and my eyes can only glorify the banal sheer wall 

so tell my mother im not coming home 

for my wings have grown pathetic and thin 

now that im in the sun again im starting to melt 

to my 6 followers 

did you forget about me?

do you wanna look at my bad art and or read my shit trash poetry?