-- I make it up as I go

not in the tags yet, but someone should humor me. pleasee.

Being a neighbour, Demetria had been called over far too many times to console the soul of somebody she now considered a friend. One side of her lips curled up, knowing that her advice probably would not be of any value. Men were different to woman – working your way around them was a much easier task than trying to put together the puzzle pieces of why a feminine heart acted in the way it did… Thick brows knitted together in a sympathetic manner as fingers clasped around the cold metal that had been handed to her, allowing Danielle to take the first spoonful. She did deserve it after all. A sigh mustered its way along her windpipe, knuckles cradling the spoon as she carved it around the frozen cream before lifting it to her own lips, pausing before she indulged into the one thing that every woman needed when they weren’t feeling themselves. “Come on, it can’t be THAT bad. If you spend your time invested into the wrong person, you aren’t giving yourself a chance to find the right person.” Hazels widened in order to add emphasis onto her words of wisdom, or more so the lesson that she had tried to teach to teach herself far too many times. The beauty was still searching herself for somebody else, though with her personality – it was near enough impossible to find a better half… Purely because she always found herself to be the dominating one who called the shots, backing out before things got too intense. Finally delivering the spoonful of melting ice cream against her taste buds, Demetria muttered with a mouthful. “What did you do anyway?”

Dani followed the swirl of Demetria’s spoon as it cruised the surface of the pint. It was something to focus on as she attempted to listen to her friend speak. Her mind was going a million miles a minute and at some point this evening, she was positive she heard the sound of Charlie Brown’s mother instead of Demi. But now, she listened, a soft laugh escaping her as she went in for another scoop. “That’d be pretty sound advice, if I knew she was the wrong person,” she replied, drawing a ‘D’ across the soft landscape of cream, “I’m the one that messed up-- so if anything, she’s the one deciding whether to waste her time on me or not,”

The woman sighed, frustration bubbling to the surface as she finally took the bite and leaned back into the couch. She felt bad for even asking Demetria to come over. It seemed like she was constantly bugging her with these sorts of things. She had proved to be a good friend so far, but tonight she wasn’t sure she could really be comforted. “I was honest with her,” she began, her words sharper than she intended. She softened them with another soft sigh. “Her girlfriend was cheating on her with half of their kickboxing class. I’d seen her with her tongue down some random girl’s throat, so I told. I know it wasn’t my business and I wasn’t trying to break them up-- I just, she deserved to know. Or I thought. She ripped me a new one and I haven’t heard from her since,” Just for good measure, Dani checked her phone and shook her head. “Yea, nothing. So, I’m just kinda in limbo here,”

“Believe me, if anyone knows that Morals can be pesky it’s me. I come from one of the most moral towns in America, hard for a gay girl to grow up there.” She smirked, the bitter memories had long since faded, replaced with only bittersweet memories. She had loved her parents, but even they had been a problem for her growing up. 

“Someone as…strong.” The brunette was careful to pick her words carefully, and she sauntered over to the woman before taking another sip of her wine for courage, “Someone as strong and beautiful as you; who has a moral compass she follows, even if doesn’t always seem easy.”

She was barely whispering now, her eyes locking with the woman’s for a moment before she took a step back, realizing that maybe she had gotten a little too close. “You’re special Emily, if no one’s ever told you that before.”

“I can imagine,” she replied, remembering how long she’d struggled with coming out. her parents hadn’t cared. she could still recall how they sighed with relief that she wasn’t telling them one of their stashes were flushed. most of her friends were long gone, living exciting lives elsewhere by then. It was Jack she’d been worried about...and the world in general. she already so much in life to set her apart, she didn’t need one more thing. but she was grateful her problems weren’t as intense as what they could have been.

Emily felt her heart beat pick up as Rebekah drew closer, encroaching on her personal space, if only a bit. She wished she hadn’t already set her wine down. She needed to hold on to some semblance of reality. “It certainly doesn’t now,” she murmured, looking into deep brown eyes.

“Honestly I’m glad you were blunt, I don’t have to worry about being…well suble. I’m honestly not that good at it.” The brunette said though she couldn’t help but grin at the woman’s blush. “I am definitely okay with it.”  The brunette said, “I…may be flirting with you, I may be interested in you even.” She smiled, “But I didn’t lie about believing in your son.”

Rebekah was glad it was out there, that she didn’t have to be subtle anymore…Though she hated to hear that she was uncomfortable “If it makes you uncomfortable I can stop.”

The words came out eaiser than expected, but she was not sure if she wanted to stop or not, ‘I just uh, it’s been a long time since I’ve met someone like you, and I guess I didn’t stop to think if it would make you uncomfortable…So I am sorry for that.”

The words shouldn’t have affected her as much as they did. She was here for Eli, no one else, and yet here she was, blushing like she was a school girl. It wasn’t a feeling she was used to, or one she let herself get used to, but something about Rebekah threw her off a bit. Maybe it was that she had this...quiet intensity about her. Or that she seemed genuine in wanting to help Eli where so many had just-- cast him off. School was important and though she did finally have her GED, she wished she would’ve finished it out and had the chance to attend a proper college. 

Reagan just couldn’t fathom why this was still such a big deal. Sure, her family wasn’t exactly as well off as Rei’s. Not by a long shot, but it wasn’t like she was exactly a common pauper either. She would always have security both alone and with her parents if necessary. If it was money that she would worry about– Reagan could provide. However, she kept that to herself and focused on her own frustrations. “Well not anymore,” she muttered, rubbing at her where her ring had been for years. It felt empty– void, but freer. Everything was a contradiction when a person was divorced. Sometimes she had to wonder if it was because she was ashamed of their relationship or worse Reagan entirely. It wasn’t fair to make that leap; however, feelings were irrational. They were no man’s friend. “Sometimes I think you liked it better when I was still officially married so you could pretend that was the reason no one could find out.” Her shoulders peaked as she slowly began to lose her lose her resolve. It wasn’t fair to push her. Coming out on someone else’s terms was never a good thing. And she didn’t want to be that person but she also didn’t want to feel like she was stuck. “You’re right, I’m sorry… I just really hate this. I got a divorce so I could stop lying and now it feels like I”m lying all over again.”

Had she not been so close, she would have missed Reagan’s muttering. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that,” she replied as her tone genuinely softened. Reagan was-- frustrated. She could see that much. But the way she brushed over the smooth skin where her ring used to be Rei’s heart ached a little. “If you want me to be honest...it was easier that way, yes,” she said, her eyes falling to her lap, “When you were married, I didn’t have to try to explain or see you look so heavy hearted,”  Uncrossing her legs, she stood, drawing closer to Reagan. Her hand moved to cup her cheek and though she wanted to, she resisted the urge to touch her any further. “But you know how I feel about you. I promise you, it’s not the same. You know that I love you,” Her thumb stroked her cheek and she stole a light kiss. “Just give me-- us-- a more time. It will be worth it. OK?” She was closer than ever to her goal and once she hit that, she didn’t care who knew about them. Her mother wouldn’t have the leverage to marry her off to some heiress or whoever she thought would be ‘best’ for her. They could live like she was used to, comfortably, for however long it took to get her publishing company off the ground.Then the two of them and her boy would be set. “Please?”