what sucks the most is the fact that winning fights with such figures as otohan, zathuda or luda himself doesn't feel like a success
things rarely do for bells hells
just think about how killing otohan should have meant no more deaths from her, but defeating her took fcg anyway. or how killing zathuda wasn't even part of the initial plan, they just couldn't allow him to leave. or how stopping ludinus only meant that the weight of the decision and all HUGE responsibility is now on bells hells shoulders
victories are supposed to feel nice. and they don't. they just mean even more bigger problems
like, no shit these guys aren't heroes, they don't know what it's like, everything they do doesn't feel impactful enough, even though it IS. there's just always more and more and more
you're a nasty nasty man ludinus. take people out of your scheme and nothing fucking changes. insane.












