give me the world on a silver platter

I said, maybe.

Fair enough. But I asked if that was a yes.

Maybe.

Is that a yes?

S'not very helpful.

Figure it out yourself, arse.

I do, and I refuse to answer.

I'll just assume this is a recent thing, then. However, it's doing nothing to help me figure out how I've been arsey to you lately, love.

Last time I checked, since I was born.

Beautifully put, but I'm almost entirely sure you know what I meant.

Nope. I’m just going to be obnoxiously cryptic and leave you little to no clues as to figure out why I’m upset.

Since when have you been such a girl, Issa?

If I remember correctly, you’ve been an arse to me.

I have? Mind jogging my memory?

Nah, white boy, you’re gonna have to go alone on this one. I’m too busy.

Oh yeah? What're you so busy with that you can't help a dear old friend out?

Well, shit. Someone’s done for.

Is this the sort of thing I can count on you to protect me from?

Did anyone end up being shot, or was it just a hit and a miss? Any sirens, yet?

No, but now that you mention it, I think that's the sound of an ambulance now. 

You get what you pay for. 

I didn’t do anything! She was sweet and cute and then she just brings me to her chic hotel where it smells like old people… 

That sounds terrifying.

You heard, me. Blood. It was rather intense. 

The fuck did you do to her, man? Jesus Christ.

Can always improve. It was still my signed shirt from the time I went to see Macklemore. 

Jesus fucking Christ. Blood?

You cheeky little devil. S'nothing to be complaining about, is it?