extrovert final boss (author edition)

I live in an extremely Mormon community in rural Northern Utah. I came out as a trans man as a teenager, about 10 years ago. My neighbor— someone who I had always known as a traditional Mormon woman in her early 40s, a devout housewife, a mother of several children, a valued community member from a very important family in our area (her brother is literally the mayor of our town), and at most SLIGHTLY more reclusive and quiet than most of the bigshots in our community— quietly told me on their front porch one evening that they have always seen themself as a man.

They wistfully told me about their college years, where they were involved in the lesbian community, before in their early 20s realizing that it was “more” than that. About how they only moved back home and got married after their college degree because the thought of being a disappointment to their family, and being disowned, felt impossible to cope with. So they got married to a man that they admit they don’t feel any ounce of attraction towards, and had several kids, and they’re not quite the pride to their parents as their siblings (due to being slightly more reclusive, not really having friends to speak of that aren’t just church ladies that they work with, and, admittedly, always seeming a bit depressed to me). They said that they were proud of me for doing what I needed to do, though, and they were happy that my family at least wasn’t disowning me.

Nobody else in our community knows. Not their family, not their husband, not their kids, not the people they do church outreach with.

And whenever I read stories of forgotten trans men, I always think of them. They’re still alive! They’re still here! And nobody but me will probably ever know! And if I hadn’t come out in this tiny little community, I’d never know either!

Idk. Sorry for the vent/rant. Thank you for listening. It crushes me to be the only one who knows them as a man, sometimes.

The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn

The Autobiography of Malcolm X

Beloved

Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee (this was the only free version I could find, and it’s a downloadable thing, so do so with caution)

The Call of the Wild

Catch-22 (it was either this version or one where the entire thing was in comic sans font)

The Catcher in the Rye

Fahrenheit 451

For Whom the Bell Tolls

Gone With the Wind

The Grapes of Wrath

The Great Gatsby

Howl

In Cold Blood

Invisible Man

The Jungle (personally I don’t like this formatting, but the site doesn’t look sketchy so…) - there’s also this which is the proper book format in a pdf, but it’s directly photocopied so it might be hard to read some of the print

Leaves of Grass

Moby Dick

Native Son

Our Bodies, Ourselves (we learned about this one in APUSH!)

The Red Badge of Courage

The Scarlet Letter

COULD NOT FIND Sexual Behavior in the Human Male (the ebook is 47 fucking dollars??? and i can’t even find sketchy websites that’ll let me download a pdf. if anyone manages to find a link, lmk please)

Stranger in a Strange Land

A Streetcar Named Desire

Their Eyes Were Watching God

To Kill a Mockingbird

Uncle Tom’s Cabin

Where the Wild Things Are (this is a slideshow!!!! how fun)

And he kept doing it. Scene after scene.

He spent the film expecting someone to make a joke about how unserious things were or to break the fourth wall or do some other self referential type thing.

Now, maybe I'm just at that point in my cycle or maybe I'm too delicate in general, but I literally teared up hearing that. Straight up cried a bit. It is so fucking sad that sincerity and genuineness is being bred out of people.

People say all the time 'this generation can't take anything seriously!' and really, is it any wonder? Younger people have been trained out of it. You are no longer encouraged to be genuine or show emotion or be honest. You are actively punished for it. In fact, you are almost guaranteed to suffer for it.

That is so fucked up. I'm sorry to go on a bit of a random ramble rant but it's so fucking gut wrenching to see younger people lose that element of themselves. You can't express your passion without being told you're 'crashing out' or 'cringe'. You have to live in this neutral state of fear of perception, and god forbid anybody step outside of it!

You're told you should only consume and succumb and be ironic and emotionless and cool.

Listen, if you're following me and you're like.... 25 or under, let's say. Please. I beg of you. Do not fall for this rhetoric. Please, for the love of all things, feel. Feel and create and be honest with yourself. Indulge in things that make you happy. Be sincere. Wear your heart on your sleeve. Do not let this hyper-capitalistic, hyper-consumerist, self-centred, individualist culture take that from you.

woa… world is full of so many beautiful possibilities

Computa show me trans man transition timeline…

Woa..

Computa show me trans woman transition timeline…

Woa..

"I'm pretty sure that fella ain't here legally."

"Well, that ain't your business Chip, it's his."

They hate being preached to. If you pull out words like 'gender wage gap' they'll tell you you're brainwashed by the far left media.

"He's one of them transgenders."

Shut down the conversation without reacting.

"His dick, not mine" will get you much further to shutting that guy down than "well it's really inappropriate to call someone a slur while I'm the job site".

[ID: a banner with a dark forest background that reads "How High! an industrial fantasy city". there is a red outline of a wolf. end ID]

How High is a rapidly developing city in the state of Wolfsden. The state is known for its sprawling forests, crystal clear lakes, and snow-peaked mountains. But, never mind that. How High has everything you could want: late-night food stands, local history museums, and most importantly: work, work, work. The city is home to the most state-of-the-art factories this side of whatever that big river’s name is. You might even occasionally see an automobile roaming How High’s maze of streets!

Of course, How High owes its success to The Wolfpack - the state’s very own resident gods. Six strong, a model family, and … sorry, did you say seven? No, you must’ve misheard. Six strong, champions of the working man! They hardly miss the forest this city used to be at all.

The poverty, bigotry, and white-collar crime is nothing you need to bother yourself with. Praise to the Wolves!

[ID: three screenshots from the zine showing a leisure activity roll table, a plot hook, and three NPCs. end ID]

In this zine ... 

This zine is a setting for How High, a fantasy industrial city. Imagine if 1880s Denver, Colorado was ruled over by a pack of wolf gods who were being driven to madness by rapid industrialization and growing bigotry within their territory. Imagined that? Okay, you've got the gist. 

The 8-page zine includes a custom layout on every page, roll tables, NPCs, plot hooks, a pantheon, and more!!

2) any vegetable is better than no vegetable

Of course, this does not absolve him of his own irredeemable actions. Sephiroth crosses a line when he chooses to direct his pain against innocent lives over those who sought to hurt him. The point isn't to say that Sephiroth is justified in wanting to destroy the world, merely to show how the cycle of violence grows and festers over time. Sephiroth is a monster. But he is a Shinra-made monster. And, in many ways, a victim. I think First Soldier made it pretty clear that Sephiroth would have been a decent, compassionate human being if he'd been granted a normal life. The fact that his natural inclination was tipped towards goodness shows that there was a mountain of potential inside of him.

*raises hand*

Hi yes hello uh um pardon, Mr. Hamaguchi-san but