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do you ever just like. feel unbelievably proud of someone youâd never even heard of previously
oh my god

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@rookthebird
It doesnât end there:
another addition
do you ever just like. feel unbelievably proud of someone youâd never even heard of previously
oh my god

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You will never understand the mental torture of being 12 years old and having a debilitating crush on Hugo Weaving Elrond & having to lie to ur friends and say you like Legolas Orlando bloom like all the other girls so you donât get fucking bullied
Now Iâm 35 and I have a live sized cardboard Elrond who lives on my stairwell & I kiss him every time I go upstairs so anyway the moral of the story is never kill yourself
No hate on you because youâre braver than any US marine for that but I think we might have been having wildly different experiences
this isn't really the same thing as intentionally/unintentionally a-spec characters but it is interesting thinking about how intentionality does dramatically change how characters read regarding a-spec identities and themes.
So: repurposed vaguely Kinseyesque scale describing your aromantic and/or asexual protagonist's awareness of and relationship to their own aromanticism/asexuality:
Unaware That This Is A Thing People Can Be. Type specimen: Carl from Dungeon Crawler Carl. Has never once considered that "not wanting romance or sex" is a thing people could feel, let alone identify as. He is normal, which means straight. It's just a coincidence that his relationship with his girlfriend was a disaster and now he's just way too busy in this new nightmare dystopia world for any of that! Anyway!
Aware They Have These Feelings, Assumes Everyone Else Also Does. Type specimen: Doug Eiffel from Wolf 359. Firmly believes that his aro-allo experiences are universal and everybody else is just better at acting like a functional human being than he is. Being a huge movie nerd also leads him to believe that "romance" as we understand it is massively exaggerated for drama in movies and people in real life don't actually do and feel that stuff any more than they mind-meld or can use the Force. He's just a fuckup at everything; why wouldn't relationships be included in that? For most of the show if you told him about aromanticism he would NOT be comforted about it, he'd probably take it as a diagnosis that his fuckup-ness regarding relationships was innate and incurable. (This doesn't have to be negative; this is also where Andy Wheyface from Arden falls and he is having a GRAND old time.)
Aware They Have These Feelings, Realizes That It Sets Them Apart From Others, Doesn't Conceptualize It As Part Of An Identity. Type specimen: Ryland Grace from Project Hail Mary. His reaction to other people having sex is mostly "why would you do that." His single attempt at a serious romantic relationship didn't work out and he has a nagging sense that there is something in him that can't maintain serious relationships; attributes it to cowardice and fear of commitment. Ironically he does know what asexuality is. He's a middle school teacher in 2020s California, he has absolutely gotten LGBTQ+ Sensitivity Education at least in "pamphlet listing queer identities" form, he for sure has students with pride flag pins on their backpacks and pride stickers on their notebooks, and he is also not immune from the Culture War Bullshit around gender in schools. Knowing that asexuality exists did not even slightly lead him to apply this to himself.
Aware They Have These Feelings, Considers Them Significant, Attributes Them To Some Existential Feature Of Their Existence Rather Than A Personal Identity. Type specimen: Murderbot from The Murderbot Diaries. Murderbot is very confident it does not want anything to do with romance or sex, and it attributes this to Being A SecUnit, and romance and sex are Human Things SecUnits Don't Do. Has not yet realized that this is an itself thing and not a SecUnit thing. Probably willfully at this point.
Considers These Feelings A Significant Aspect Of Their Selfhood, But Doesn't Name It. Type specimen: Sister Carpenter from The Silt Verses. Clearly confident in who she is and what she wants in her personal relationships, recognizes that as something that makes her different from others and out of step with what others expect from her, and is basically like, that's their problem. She knows who she is. Sometimes other people try to make it her problem but she has so many other problems that societal amatonormativity keeps getting pushed lower and lower on her list of Problems.
Recognizes Themself As Aromantic/Asexual As A Personal Identity. Type specimen: Nova NoStar from InCo. Clearly considers this part of her identity, but is allergic to talking about her feelings even at her therapy android's insistence and besides that's not anybody else's business is it?
Publicly Identifies As Asexual And Describes It With Period-Correct Sexual Orientation Language. Type specimen: Sally Grissom from ars PARADOXICA. The only character I've ever heard come out as asexual and lay out the definition in terms of sexual orientation and attraction to another character on-air that made me go "yeah she would do this, this is in character for Sally." Strongly feel like she would be an active commenter on the 2010s ace blogosphere. Would get in an argument about the correct definition of asexuality on AVEN.
X. Their Culture Conceptualizes Intimate Relationships In A Fundamentally Different Framework Than We Use. Type specimen: Breq from the Imperial Radch Trilogy. Whatever model of gender and sexuality the Radch is on it is NOT ours. Breq is still not interested though.
The worst-sounding piece of advice I've ever been given that does actually work is to frame your health concerns as coming from someone close to you, whom you do not believe. Tell your doctor that you've been having pain and your mom/friend/partner thinks it might be an ovarian cyst, but you don't think so because the pain is much more intense and it has to be something else. This gives your doctor an unseen third party to fight instead of you. They can't just tell this third party, who isn't present, that you pulled a muscle, they now need to prove to this third party that it is not an ovarian cyst.
At which point they will find an ovarian cyst, but they now get whatever fucked up satisfaction they derive out of proving you wrong, because you didn't believe it could a cyst at all, but guess what? They did find a cyst! It's such a good thing you didn't listen to your intuition and came to them to verify your lay diagnosis from that third party! Bonus? Doctor doesn't have to feel like they look stupid in front of a patient, which is really what all this is about. Not your health, why would you think your medical diagnosis is about your health? It's obviously about a doctor's potential ego.
And apparently this works. Apparently you just need to be able to always play 4D chess with your medical professionals in order to find an avenue of advocating for yourself and getting you medical needs met. Isn't that great?
I hate it here, actually.
i had strep for a month one time. then i invented Fake Boyfriend about it. immediate antibiotics. Fake Boyfriend will save your life.
Unless you're someone doctors will percieve as a cis-passing/cis guy, in which case they will probably think you're a person, but just in case, blame your mum.
anyone else think it would maybe be funny if the imperium of mankind was wrong about everything

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Ella Enchanted (2004) Hannibal (2013-2015)
So turns outâŚ..you guys are not gonna believe thisâŚâŚ.but it turns out. Reading real books. Is good for you actually.
Let me be completely clear - Iâm not being a sarcastic ass. Iâm just realizing all over again, in real time, for myself, that reading a real life published book makes your neurons feel like theyâre getting a spa day. Like I can feel my brain getting juicer and wrinklier with every page I turn. This shit is no joke, this is like hard drugs if hard drugs were good for you and made your brain feel revived and alive.
funi in my head, stupid in execution. Anyway, happy pride.
Shipping Markiplier's guy from Iron Lung with Ryan Gosling's guy from Project Hail Mary is a great example of a crossover ship that is not, per se, a crack ship.
These two never met and the stories they are from are not technically all that compatible (Grace is trying to stop the stars from going out, Simon exists in a far-future society where they already did), and yet, the themes and circumstances of the characters do create the irrefutable impression that if they ever DID meet then they would have a whole lot of feelings about it. They would not, indeed could not be normal about each other without that seeming weirder than if they had sex about it.
No but like before I watched Project Hail Mary Iâd occasionally see fanart and it made me wonder when the dude with long black hair was going to show up and why were people shipping him with Grace but he didnât show up and I was very confused and yesterday it finally dawned on me it was Markiplier all along you fucks!?

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hey as long as discourse on whether joining the military is bad or not (it is) is doing the rounds again, iâd like to remind everyone that people who were in the military but are not any longer are not ontologically incapable of being leftists or good people. many of the militaryâs harshest critics are vets. theyâve seen what the military can do. theyâve personally been chewed up and spat. so have their friends. they know first hand the horrors the military has inflicted on the world.
obviously many vets never stop drinking the kool-aid. but many others do. and we shouldnât reject them as comrades. chelsea manning was in the army before becoming a whistleblower. edward snowden was in the nsa. etc. yes call out people for joining, keep pointing out itâs wrong to kill people for money. even if youâre poor. even if youâre ignorant. but donât condemn someone solely for their past if theyâve done the hard work of learning and growing. i think itâs pretty easy to walk and chew gum on this one. but itâs easy for some of us to forget that we have to.
Like most Jewish people in America, I know more than the average number of people named Epstein, going back to my friend Becky from 3rd grade to my now retired dermatologist.
None of them are billionaires. None of them own islands. None of them run sex trafficking rings. I would be shocked if any of them ever raped anyone.
The use of the label âEpstein classâ doesnât actually decry corruption or sexual violence, itâs not a witty rejoinder against billionaires generally, or even used to describe those involved in the Epstein conspiracy specifically.
In use, it serves to only replace the perfectly serviceable and understood word oligarchy with a Jewish name.
It does so at a time when antisemitism is becoming more bold, more intentional and more dangerous, from every part of the sociopolitical spectrum.
And thatâs not by accident.
Think before you label. And expect to be judged accordingly.
I think it should be considered a form of degendering to try to divorce trans people from their gendered histories. My gender doesn't make sense without the fact that I was a little boy, or something like it, before I was a girl and a woman. If you were always a girl, thats awesome, but a lot of people project their dysphoria onto me when I try to talk about my own fucking life. If you think talking about having been a boy makes me less of a woman, that is degendering.
i love making friends in fandom, i love playing with our toys together, i love coming up with increasingly niche aus, i love lifting strangers up, i love motivating people to create, i love watching someone get excited over an idea and immediately running with it, i love yelling in tags together, i love seeing someone gain confidence in their writing/art because people were kind to them <33
We need an alternative to doesthedogdie cause theyâve started fucking paywalling warnings that include timestamps for triggering moments.
Like what the fuck
I just checked and
Need to read about trigger warnings? Please click the whimsical dog icon for more information!
I recommend Unconsenting Media. Not as comprehensive as DoesTheDogDie, but if sexual assault is a trigger for you, itâs a good resource
rbing again real quick--i and other(s?) have noted in other rbs that this is almost never done. it's for very few properties, and it's only for timestamped warnings that are done in-house, not by users.
there are still timestamps available for warnings on those same triggers for those same properties. just bc there's a paywall on something doesn't mean other comments and timestamps can't be posted or read for free on that property or that trigger.
see here:
i don't have an account and haven't paid for anything on the site, so all of those comments are what i'm seeing for free.
i had to search and search to find anything that had paywalls, and had to resort to looking at The Substance, as referenced here. i've been using the site regularly since the op posted and have never organically encountered a paywall on anything, including on very popular properties.
i don't see any reason to stop using the site--everything is still available for free. they just have added another way for some ppl to choose to pay some $ (in addition to ads), since this is a completely free service, and no website is free to maintain.
as an example, someone with the money could pay to see the timestamps, and then leave a free comment with the same timestamps for others if they wanted to.
I've seen this post on my dash a few times now and I want to boost this specific addition. I've emailed the owner of the site to get clarification on this, and I was told the motivation behind this. He wanted to start paying some people to memorize all 200+ triggers on the site, sit down and watch popular movies/shows to thoroughly analyze whenever any trigger pops up, and note down timestamps and details of them. Ads unfortunately do not cover this (they probably only cover the site's base upkeep), so the subscription service is specifically to pay these people. Community comments have never been paywalled and are still accessible.
He thanked me for my feedback when I expressed confusion and concern about the paywalled comments being mixed in with the free comments, and has since updated the site to make them clearly distinct, along with a preview of what the paid comments look like:
He was very transparent about it all and very kind. He also said this was his mistake and is trying to clear it up. Please continue to use DoesTheDogDie.com, it is an excellent resource and there is nothing else like it!

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So proud of them!!!
the thing about "eridian worldbuilding" is that you need to make 3 in-depth, separate cultures MINIMUM. then you need to give them all separate reasons to think the other is ridiculous. this is necessary so you can triangulate how most people on erid felt about first contact being established by someone like rocky, the same way i look at grace's white americanisms and want to bash my head against a wall