Z A G I N I O N Y

to say celeste was stunned would have been a grave understatement. out of everyone she imagined would call her in the middle of night, it wouldn’t have been roman. at first she hadn’t wanted to answer but she couldn’t seem to help herself. even if it was possibly going against her better judgment she had told him she would help. it was a situation that had happened before and likely would happen again. she knew how bad his father could be especially when he had been drinking. garrett maddox seemed to be on his best behavior whenever she was around.  she was biting down on her lip as she climbed out of her car and approached him,” it’s fine,” she said after a moment,” i remember how bad he can get.” she was biting down on her lip before glancing towards the door,” is he inside?” part of her just wanted to avoid being alone with roman for any extended amount of time. she didn’t wait for an answer and instead just made her way into the bar. her gaze instantly went to garret who had claimed a spot at the bar for himself. she didn’t look behind her to see if roman had followed but made her way over,” hey dad,” she said slowly, nearly hesitating at calling him that. it took her by surprise when she felt him pull her into a hug. 

“Yeah, having a fit about them cutting him off.” The sigh that fell from his lips was from pure exhaustion. Just his father alone made Roman feel heavy and tired in a way that most wouldn’t understand, especially because he hardly showed how much it all got to him. He waited a few more seconds after she had disappeared inside, taking in a deep breath before turning to go inside himself. He came up just in time to hear her call him dad and the quick turn of the head from his father followed by the hug had Roman’s gaze falling to the ground for a second, bringing a hand up to rub the side of his head. The whole thing was fucked from the second that he hit her name on his phone and asked her for help but he’d blame it on his fathers lack of care. Their separation wasn’t something Garrett wanted to accept, guilting him at times without even fully knowing what transpired between the two of them. Roman learned to mostly ignore it, the words of a drunk who lost the love of his life and never recovered - no point in arguing with him. “How’re you doin’ darlin’ how come you ain’t come ‘round anymore? Shouldn’t let this idiot keep ya away.” Garrett said, hooking a thumb in Roman’s direction. “Always got jokes.” Roman commented, looking between the two of them. “Ah, come on i’m only kiddin’ why don’t you join us for some dri--” Before Garrett could even finish Roman was jumping in. “We’re not having any drinks dad, they’re not even gonna serve you anything anymore.” Garrett only made a sound of annoyance, brushing off Roman’s words. 

Everything with Roman was just so easy, so completely free of complications and that was exactly what Nina needed right about now, with the frustration from the lack of evidence in the most recent murders at an all time high. Nina was just about to completely lose herself in that kiss before letting out a loud laugh at Loki’s wagging tail and doggy grin. “Hi, big guy. Did you miss me?” Nina asked, reaching out to rub the top of Loki’s head, the back of his ears and on his neck before showing him a pout. “I’m so sorry I didn’t brin’ anythin’ for ya, big guy, but I promise I’ll save some of my food just for you,” Nina said before looking up at Roman, letting out a soft sigh when Loki’s attention was taken by something else, giving her a direct chance to wrap her arms around his neck and press herself up against him. “Did you just admit to missin’ me?” She teasingly asked before finally, finally pressing her lips against his, softly at first but unable to stop herself from deepening it. “I missed you too,” Nina admitted, mumbling the words against his lips. “We should– we should probably eat first,” Nina said with a slightly breathless laugh when she pulled away from the kiss. “Don’t want the food gettin’ cold. I do have one rule tonight, though. No talkin’ about the case. Or dead bodies. It’s… it’s gettin’ on my nerves. I hate dead ends and I…” Nina paused as she gave herself the small pleasure of running her hands over his arms, and feeling the strong muscles on his back before pressing herself up against him again. “I’d rather focus on you tonight, mmkay?”

Smiling as he watched the quick interaction till Loki went off on his own, Roman’s gaze moved back onto Nina. His smile only grew as his arms slipped around her waist once again. “Did I?” He teased in return, welcoming the kiss and for a second losing himself in it, tightening his hold on her leaning his head down more. It gave him a desperately needed moment to forget about all the shit going on that seemed to have no solutions in the near future. If anything, it felt like everything would be getting worse before it balanced out - he wouldn’t go as far as saying it would get better just yet. “I don’t know, I think it can wait.” He half-jokingly protested. He was more than okay with her rule, he didn’t want to talk about any of it which that alone was his problem to begin with. Constantly pushing things aside, thinking he’d come back around to it only when it was necessary but that mindset easily got him into trouble. “That’s good with me.” With a single nod of his head he leaned down, pressing another kiss to her lips before forcing himself to break away from her. “So you gonna tell me what you’ve been doin’ that doesn’t involved what you just mentioned? Been getting on stage? ‘Cause ima need to go be a groupie one of these days.” 

[text] Nothing

[text] Just wanted to talk about something

To say that Roman didn’t have the time or the patience for this kind of bullshit was an understatement. He had other things to be dealing with but here he was with his old man trying and failing to get him to act a little be decent long enough to drag his ass home. With almost half an hour wasted and no sight of it changing by his own doing, Roman got desperate. There weren’t many people he could call knowing they’d handle the situation better than him or that wouldn’t make it worse merely because his dad would tell most to fuck off. With his siblings out of town and practically nowhere else to turn he had given Celeste a call which he debated for what felt like an eternity. There were different types of drunk that his father got and even in the worst of his attitudes, he’d always smile and act decent with his sister or Celeste and occasionally even the girl Dom brought around before. With how irritated he was, he was waiting in front of the bar with a cigarette in hand - a clear indicator of his stress. Watching as she came up he took blew off the smoke in the opposite direction before putting it out. “Thanks for coming, I didn’t know what else to do.”

Roman had made his way outside of the town hall, feeling the need to take a break from the people inside. Usually he didn’t necessarily mind the town coming together for things, even with the way things had gone, it was feeling a little suffocating tonight. He had started off with the tie nicely around his neck of course but he had ripped it off from around his neck tempted to throw it in the nearest bin. Instead he let it hang from around his neck, pulling his phone out as it began ringing. A minute into the call and you could visibly see the way it took the energy out of him. “I can’t right now.” Turning around when he heard footsteps behind him, he froze up at the sight of Celeste. He figured she’d be somewhere around the place, just hoping he’d miss her although with the way she looked? It felt impossible. His mind snapped back, sighing at the voice on the other end. “I don’t know what to tell you and I don’t have the time for this.” Hanging up he slid the phone back into his pocket, his eyes still glued on her pretending like his father hadn’t just caused more tension in his shoulders. “You look-” There was clear hesitation to finish his sentence, since it didn’t roll off so naturally like it once had. “-beautiful.”  

“Someday, I’m going to find all the embarrassin’ photos of you and you won’t be able to stop me,” Nina said, showing him a playful smile before inhaling deeply. “Dan’ it, that smells so good,” she murmured as she faced the food, their usual activity making her form an appetite. “Thank you for feedin’ me, bubba,” Nina teasingly said, as she took a big bite and settling herself back on the couch, her body facing him. “So I was, uh, I was thinkin’… I, um, I’m in need of an oil change tomorrow but the only time I can drop it off is after work so I was wonderin’ if… maybe you could, uh, meet me at the auto shop then… give me a ride… somewhere we can have dinner? You in the mood for some Agostino’s tomorrow?” Nina asked, showing him an almost bashful smile. They were friends. She shouldn’t have to feel as if it was this huge deal to ask him to have dinner with her. After all, the man had already seen her naked. Plenty of times. Asking him to merely accompany her should be a piece of cake. “Not that I mind comin’ back here for more of your cookin’,” Nina added. 

“Good luck with it.” Jokingly or not, for the time being it wasn’t going to be simple to pull off since most things were in boxes, not even at his dads place, but in storage which came with a story of its own. Although he imagined the second Ava was around, she’d be more than willing to offer them up. Sitting on the edge of the couch now, he took a bite of his food before turning his head to look at her. They had gone together to the Equestrian and things had gone more than smoothly, not that he was worried if it because of her but everyone that could’ve inserted themselves into their...time together. He couldn’t deny the fact that he had been more than a little worried about possibly running into Celeste while they were together not only from the awkwardness that would’ve ensued from his end but since he had yet to share that piece of information. Why exactly he held onto it, when anyone in his life already knew the mess of it all? He wasn’t exactly prepared to face the answer to that. He was grinning till Agostino’s was mentioned, almost causing it to fall entirely but he played it off by taking another bite of his food. “I’ll be there waitin’ for you at the shop, can’t let all the guys jump on tryin’ to impress ya while i’m not around.” He teased looking back at her with another smile. “Agostino’s ain’t worth the wait though, how about we go somewhere else. I got a good place in mind.” It was almost instant that some guilt kicked in. While he hadn’t mentioned things about Celeste to her before, this moment was different. He was actively guiding her another way without any intention of being honest as to why.

it was never going to be easy for celeste to see roman. the two of them rarely saw each other since they had separated. there had been a few slip ups that she tried to avoid thinking about. what had happened between them hadn’t been easy in the slightest. normally she wouldn’t have minded waiting around with someone’s dog that had gotten loose. the moment her eyes landed on roman she had wanted to turn the other way. never did she think that she would be where she was right then. she sighed the second she heard the question clearly aimed at loki. a look of amusement appeared at the fact that loki was going to hide behind her legs,” i think i’m partially to blame,” she admitted,” he probably smelled baked goods.”  her stomach was lurching the very moment that their eyes locked. it was never going to be easy to see him and she knew it. she merely shrugged, biting down on her lip,” hi,” she said slowly,” i’m okay, got my two year chip a few weeks back.” talking with him used to be easy but those days were long gone. she was glancing down at loki who was nuzzling into her leg,” what about you? are things good?” honestly part of her wasn’t even sure that she actually wanted to know.  yet she knew that it would be rude to just walk away. 

“yeah, probably.” there was a small nod of his head but his eyes were more focused on loki. for a second he felt like those parents ready to make a face at their kid, you know, the one that immediately got them to act right but unfortunately for him it wasn’t that easy. “two years?” he straightened up as the words fell from his mouth. had it been that long already? it was weird, sometimes it felt like an eternity had gone by since everything imploded but then other times, it felt like not nearly enough time has passed. the latter usually coming in moments like this, when they were forced to face each other and he realized just how not-okay he was about it still. it was his own problem though, he did everything too intensely. he had loved her, too intensely and it broke him up to walk away from her in a way that people didn’t even realize thanks to the facade he kept up, he didn’t have time to fall apart; he left that for the other people in his life. either way -because of it, he wasn’t sure he’d ever let go of that resentment that festered. “yeah, they’re good. just...” exhaling he slid his hands into his pockets. “keeping busy.” how much was he meant to say anyway? sharing details about his day to day life just seemed wrong. maybe because he wasn’t exactly wanting to know the details of her own which came with some confusing reasons. “dominic and ava are planning to come around next week so i’m tryin’ to clean the house before they get here.” which was where he was before coming to the park to give himself a break from being around his dad.