american oddity

Using the fading sound of the music as a tell-tale sign that she had got far enough away for it to be deemed somewhat safe, Alexa kicked off her heels before making her way onto the sand, disappearing underneath the decking as she sunk onto the ground. Busying herself with watching the waves creep up the chilled sand, each time edging closer and closer to her manicured toes, Alexa stirred as she heard company approaching, a comforted smile lighting up her features as soon as it turned out to be who she was indeed waiting for. Even if she wasn’t entirely sure how this conversation would go. 

 "Hi…“ She spoke softly, toying with the idea of getting up and embracing him, though she ultimately remained on the floor, loosely hugging her knees instead. "Are you having a nice time?…”

As soon as Alexa came into view, Finn's eyes never left her direction as he walked closer, each step igniting a fire under his shoes practically that encouraged him to move faster. Proper alone time with the other was exactly what he'd been thinking about for what felt like ages by now, even if it were just a chance to hear her voice directed to him and only him. Once he had reached her, his head was tilted down and slightly cocked as he took a moment to take her in, a faint smile laying on his lips as he admired how beautiful she looked. "Hey.." 

With the greeting aside now, Finn reached for the section of his slacks right by his thighs to pull up on them and give some slack as he slowly sank down to sit on the sand next to her, craving to share the same air. "My time is better now out here, really.. you looked like you were enjoying it in there."

No matter how composed Alexa liked to think she could be while tipsy - nothing could’ve prevented her from the neediness she felt during a day that was all about romance. Watching one of her best friends get married as everyone else got to enjoy pulling up their significant other to dance, while she sat a mere few tables away from Finn. The man whom she’d still not really got to smooth things over with after their little bust up, and was entirely unsure if he even wanted anything to do with her anymore. There were no words to describe how much she hated feeling like this. She was always used to being the desired, not the one sat doing the pining. And it wasn’t for a lack of trying. Whenever there were large groups up and dancing, the female would conveniently position herself in the middle, close enough to Finn to brush up against him every now and then, yet not obvious enough to make it look intentional. Of course, then came more drinks. And any self respect she was clinging onto flung out the window as she slid in next to him at the bar, leaning her forearms against it to look as if she was just waiting to get served. “Come down to the beach with me? Under the decking?” She allowed her gaze to meet with his for only a second. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to speak to me, but…I’ll wait there for ten minutes”. And just like that, she was off, slipping out of the function unnoticed.

@rockwitt​ 

Ever since that night on vacation he had with Alexa, Finn had particularly drawn himself further away from his marriage with Sarah. Clearly there hadn't been an actual letter and he had since recognize how odd quite a lot of people had behaved on the trip, but that didn't stop himself from distancing with his wife. It became where Alexa couldn't leave his mind through nearly all times of the day, especially when they haven't properly made up. Finn couldn't bring himself to take his wife as his plus one, though. He knew Alexa was going to be there, making it impossible to hide where his attention will be captured through the night. After the ceremony, Finn wasn't entirely sure if he should allow himself to drink as much as he was tempted to since he felt the need to have control over his emotions for the night, at least until he knew where Alexa's mind was over the two of them. After he had yelled at her that night, he couldn't be sure what she was truly feeling. That composure flew through the window, though, once he felt her slight touches with each dance on the floor. It was enough to send him straight to the bar. It felt like torture to sit there and watch her, seeing how beautiful she was and not knowing when or if he'd truly get to admire her. For a moment, Finn bowed his head towards his drink with his eyes shut while allowing the music to play around him, only lifting it up when he heard the familiar voice he'd missed. It wasn't in his ears for long now that he was already watched her walk away, but there was no denying that every word fled through his body like adrenaline. Of course he wanted to. Without raising suspicion, Finn finished off his drink and made his way towards the beach. There wasn't a chance he'd let her believe he didn't want to speak to her.

“I know, I know, believe me, I’m panicking on your behalf, too. I went straight back down to the post office the next morning to try and intercept it, but…” Glancing over her shoulder, hyper-aware that Gossip Girl could be watching from any corner, Alexa attempted to prevent sending Finn into total meltdown by grabbing his hand and hoping he could read between the lines as she stared him down through thick lashes. “I’ll sort it out, okay? Trust me, I’ll have someone check your mailbox every single day, or I - I’ll say I made it all up….Just please promise me you won’t call her. Not yet. Please don’t follow it up before I can fix this-”

With stress coursing through his veins, Finn didn’t notice the way Alexa was looking around. All he could do was move his eyes over everywhere else as if he were searching for a way to figure out what he was going to do. For a moment, his lover’s touch grounded him enough to set his nerves at ease, but it was quickly replaced with anger as he listened. “Made it all up?” Finn pulled his hand away painfully, staring at her in a way that screamed how he was trying to understand how she could have done this. “She doesn’t even know you, Alexa! It’s not like the two of you are a couple of sick friends that play games. What the hell makes you think you can fix this? God, I can’t believe you. Out of everything I’ve given you, I never gave you the right to ruin my life... Why- .. Why?! I would have done it myself if you just told me how you felt..” 

Literally please don’t be sweet right now, I don’t deserve it. I’d say we’re right up to a ten on the worrisome scale…

I…I’ve told her, Finn. Sarah. I wrote her a letter. I…don’t know if it’s reached her yet, I haven’t heard anything back, but I’ve been battling regrets since I sent it and I’m so sorry. I don’t know why I did it. I got hammered last night and started feeling righteous and I thought it was the right thing to do but every moment since I’ve been hating myself because I know I should’ve told you and given you a chance to fix this yourself, I literally can’t begin to express how much I regret writing it…

Alexa.. Why wouldn’t you just come to me about your feelings? Have I ever made you feel like you couldn’t do that? Fuck, this can’t be real. It would have already hurt her to hear it from me, you don’t even know how bad it could be hearing it from anyone else, especially from you! Alexa, I could lose my own son over this. God damn it, you should have just told me how you feel. How would you feel if the woman your husband has been seeing for months behind you back sent you a letter? I can’t even think straight right now. 

Listen, I gotta tell you something and I know there’s no way on this earth that I can ask you to not get mad about it. But I just couldn’t carry on with the way things were going, Finn…

@rockwitt​

It’s safe to say that I’ve never even considered a possibility of being mad about anything when it comes to you, which makes your precursor to whatever this is about that much worse. How worried should I be right now?

So recently I’ve been nominated for an Academy Award for Best Actor which is just … mind blowing, really. I’m up against some of the greatest actors I’ve ever known and I’m honestly just happy to even be nominated thought of. Not even expecting to win it because some of these lads definitely deserve it. What’s something exciting goin’ on with you? Love to support everyone in everythin’ they do and all. Spread the love and all that.

Buddy, you should have gotten this years ago. No one should ever deliver a line like ‘I’m not coming back for thirty percent. I’m coming back for everything,’ the way you did and not walk away with golden Oscar. It’s the go to scene for me whenever I want to channel some intensity with my own acting. 

I am celebrating valentine’s day by eating ice cream and watching “Catching Killers”. My mom asked me if I was treating as a cautionary tale of dating gone wrong… since most victims are women attacked by men. And when I said know, she said “Victoria, maybe it should be. If any one was going to get mixed up with a good lucking man who turned out to me a serial killer… it would be you sweetie.” There is nothing like a good old pep talk from my mother on good old V day. Excuse me while I delete my tinder profile and never look in a mans direction ever again.

Moments like these remind me of how fortunate I am to have never felt inclined to use a dating app or profile in the first place. That’s the scary part of it all, not knowing who you’re really meeting up with. Those episodes about people keeping up the lie for years, though? Ungodly. Makes you give a second look at a long time partner subconsciously. If you ever decide to look in that direction, though, I’ll do a thorough background check and tail on the guy to keep your mom’s prediction at bay. 

𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓇 𝒻𝒶𝓋𝑜𝓇𝒾𝓉𝑒 𝒸𝓇𝒾𝓂𝑒.

Dated: 20th November, 2021.

Alexa could still recall the details of the night that she met Finn. Moreover, she could recall how he had pretty much ignored her for the woman on his arm, despite her best attempts at prying his attention away. It wasn’t as if she intentionally went out to get between anyone and their marriage - as heinous as she liked to pretend she could be sometimes, it wasn’t in her nature to be that callous, and when she’d explained the situation to one of her friends ( aptly chosen because she lived far away and would never meet the people in question ), she described it as somewhat of an infatuation with him. Or, an infatuation with the fact that no matter how many events they ran into each other at, or how many captivating conversations they had, or how evident it was that she was beginning to feel something towards him, he would never give her the same sort of attention he gave his wife. 

She watched them sometimes. When the starlets of hollywood milled around, partaking in dull conversations that would likely lead to them fucking just to be featured on the B side of their new album, never to talk again. Then there was Finn and Sarah - he, ever the gentleman, usually had his hand on the small of her back. A gentle reassurance that she wasn’t alone in this world of fame that she knew little about, and it seemed ridiculous to Alexa that something so small could make her so jealous. She knew it was wrong, especially as she had no desire to settle down, but it was that companionship and pandering that she craved that landed them exactly in the position they were in now. 

This definitely wasn’t the first time. 

As she sat at the bar of some high-class hotel in a town she didn’t even know the name of ( the receptionist would later on tell her it was Lake Havasu ), she awaited his arrival with mixed feelings of guilt, but more dominantly: excitement. After a long time of playing cat and mouse, she had finally caught up to him, and though it wasn’t without risk, the adrenaline of waiting to see him walk through the entrance and having to wait until they were behind closed doors to throw her arms around him, was as usual, running away with her. 

@rockwitt 

Sleep used to be easy to come by, entirely peaceful as it guides Finn to reach a new day refreshed and ready to go through the sequences of his life. To wake up, give his wife a kiss, and prepare his son the right type of morning to further his growth properly. It wasn’t quite this simple anymore, though. Guilt filled each thought that crossed his mind whether it was about his family or the girl he was wanting to be in bed with that night instead. Unlike others that experienced this predicament, though, Finn didn’t have regrets. Maybe that’s what kept him up the most. 

It’s not like it was his goal to go out and find someone other his wife that would know the feeling of his hands smoothing over every inch of her body, but that’s just how it came about with Alexa. He’d been used to seeing beautiful woman by then, given his opportunities in the limelight since his career took off, and he prided himself with not looking twice at them or how he could easily break character after scenes of the sort he did in AHS. Lady Gaga herself couldn’t even make him long to be with another woman. Then he met Alexa. It wasn’t obvious at first, especially since he was often with his wife at the time, but over the course of more outings, things were changing. His eyes began to linger for longer, his lips feelings dryer with each look, and his fingers twitching with thoughts of touching her. It was only worse in events where his family wasn’t at his side through it. 

Now he knew what it was like. Every moment with Alexa felt like alleviation from any guilt that washed over him whenever they were apart. Coming back to her was the only solace he found short of telling his wife what he was doing. He needed that tonight, needed the way her eyes would light up whenever he came into view. Driving to where they had agreed to meet had his fingers tapping against the steering wheel with exhilaration encouraging each tap, each bite to his lip, and each thrill coursing his veins that could chill his blood and warm it at the same time. Any moment now he was going to walk up to where she sat, stand behind and whisper in her ear so she could only hear as if they were in their own little world. 

Serious question time.  If you could have kissed anyone on New Years Eve whom would it be and why?  No significant others, friends, or acquaintances are not allowed.   I am Sarah Drew, I am very nosy and wonder whom you would have kissed Tuesday night!

@hwlstart​

You seem like the type that easily gets down to business whenever you want. That’s admirable, for sure. I’m Finn and I can’t say I’ve met too many like that.

@hollywoodland-hqs​

So I really wanted to be not that guy who is like new year new me. But I think maybe in a way I want to reinvent myself? There isn’t much I would change but I think lately I been slacking on my fitness and things that I used to love doing. I am going to try to get back into drawing and working out. Anyways I am Paul Anderson…who are you and whats your new year’s resolution? 

Not going to lie to you, it’s been making me laugh at least a little whenever someone’s mentioned turning themselves into a new person so far. It’s always a good idea until you’re looking in retrospect. Name’s Finn, and I’m not setting out for anything but a year I can look back on fondly, honestly. Purely good memories to come.

Alright then, I’m going to confess it. I’m a bit chuffed up about tomorrow being the Golden Globes and all but I’m also beyond bloody nervous. Nervous enough that I’ve fully taken advantage of being in Beverly Hills and have eaten my nerves all day. I’ve eaten way too much and I’m going to be honest with you if I don’t fit in my suit tomorrow because of this I’m going to have a bit of a diva melt down, I mean it. That’s not stopping me from snacking though, so lay it on me what are some good snacks that I should indulge myself in while I’m here. I have exactly…20 hours to indulge myself before I have a nervous meltdown.

@hwlstart​

Turns out you had nothing to worry about, man. Killed it up there, and I’m pretty glad you won. Very deserving. Were you able to find anything that pleased your craving? I’m afraid my cabinet of snacks have been nothing but shortbreads since my recent trip to Ireland, so you might have to find someone with more food diversity next time if I haven’t moved on.

I’m pretty sure I just had the best nap of my life. I was playing the Sims on my computer and the next thing I realized, I was waking up and it was 4:30. Talk about time flying by, huh? Guess I really needed that nap, since I’ve been everywhere since hiatus started on the 20th, and I go back to work tomorrow. I feel like I’m in high school with only two weeks and two days worth of a hiatus from work, but that’s adult life, I guess.

How are you lovelies? How’s your 2020 been so far? 

@hollywoodland-hqs​

Those types of naps are often either the best I’ve had or the worst, it hardly feels in between. You’re definitely making me recall my younger days when I’d fall asleep on that game, though. I’d always wake up to find my sims doing exactly what they didn’t need to. What’s this schedule of yours filled with if so busy? I’m interested in filling my new year with as much as possible after this down time I’m spending right now.