to the moon

♦ about ♦

age: 20 relationship status: in a relationship education: london ‘78 / hogwarts ‘81 occupation: full-time student / part-time stargazer 

♦ recap ♦

Zoe will never claim herself to be the boldest, bravest, nor smartest person in any room. But she does believe herself to be the most hopeful. Whether it’s blindly believing that people can change for the better, or giving people the benefit of the doubt more times than necessary, she’s alright with making a few mistakes here and there. Even after the death of her cousin, Zoe doesn’t believe that the world has to be seen through a lens of darkness.

Her conviction on that thought has only grown, especially through her relationship with Sirius. While she knows he has been through a lot in his life, his very existence is more than enough evidence to prove her hypothesis correct. It’s part of the reason why she’s so proud of him, and so unwilling to let go.

One thing Zoe has managed to overcome is some of her fear of taking charge of her own body in the form of acting. While for many it may seem like a small thing, she has never once felt more brave than she did when she was on stage, reciting lines, pretending to be someone else.

Whether it’s her friendship with Dorcas, her drive to become brave, or the love she feels for Sirius, Zoe wants to make sure that in the future she helps to forge: fear is left by the wayside.

P.S. Still wants to travel to space. Get the girl a rocket, damn.

♦ dating history ♦

Isla’s smile faltered. “I mean, it’s true. I do always get the feeling that I need to do more too.” She had, in fact, recently started going to protests, but it didn’t feel like nearly enough. “But you don’t have to think about war and tragedy all the time, you know. It’s okay to just… be elsewhere entirely sometimes.” She gingerly took another step toward the girl. “Um, do you mind if I sit?”

.

Zoe gestured next to her, always eager to make a friend. Something that was both very helpful, and very harmful should the wrong person eventually come around. “I know. I think it’s just, with everything that’s been happening, and how people are reacting, I don’t want anyone to think that I’m just a silly airhead.”

“Why would that be a bad thing?” She asked sincerely, and tentatively took a step closer to where the girl was sitting. For a stranger who she didn’t expect to find, this girl was surprisingly comfortable to talk to. “I mean, people tell me that too, but I really don’t get why. There’s so much to see up there, so much to wonder.” Isla barely noticed the smile that formed on her lips as she mused about the night sky.

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“Because there’s a lot happening here, too. All around us. Sometimes it feels selfish to even glance up.” Zoe didn’t want to be ignorant. She didn’t want to step into a room and feel as if she missed something vitally important. Her dreams always had her living among the stars, but perhaps her biggest flaw of all had been believing that space was more important than Earth. That a rocket ship could fly her far enough away from her mother.

Isla chuckled lightly as she tentatively stepped closer to the girl. “I’m usually not the quiet type either. Quite the opposite, really.” Her gaze then floated up toward the sky, and just stayed there for a bit. “It’s just once in a while that I feel like being alone with the stars for a little bit. Helps me slow down a tad.”

Only after looking down at the girl again, a few moments later, did Isla wonder if she was oversharing. Another chuckle, this time to cover for her embarassment. “Um, I guess you didn’t really ask, huh. I just– sometimes I say too much.”

.

“Stars?” Zoe practically whispered back, immediately connecting to the girl on a level that she doubted anyone would be comfortable with. It was just, well, not everyone quite understand the universe the way that Zoe did. Both in the romantic sense, and not. In many ways, the night sky had been her first friend, the galaxy her second. Even now they bore down on her, begging her to release her secrets into the air so they might converse and offer up a solution. Stars didn’t reply. But they remained. Wasn’t that enough?

She huffed out a laugh, her shoulders loosening from their position nearer to her neck. Having previously been hunched in as though she were in pain. Maybe she was. “Sometimes I think I spend too much time staring at the sky.”

WHEN: March 28th, 1981

WHERE: Puddlemere Ruins

WHO: Isla & @rocketshipbell

Another day, another full shift, and Isla found herself stepping outside of Puddlemere’s city bounds, still in her Wixburger uniform. A diversion from her usual routine, to be sure; one would be more likely to find her either at a club, the quidditch stadium, or on a friend’s basement smoking a joint or two. Today, however, she felt like being alone in her thoughts for a bit, and the clear, starry sky above the Ruins seem to call to her.

Was it dangerous? Maybe so, but the past month had shown that “safe” was quite the relative concept. At least in the Ruins she’d get some silence and a gorgeous view.

The one thing she didn’t expect was to find someone already there when she arrived, yet it was exactly what happened. Isla’s first instinct was to back out without disturbing the unknown girl, but of course she would end up stepping on a branch and getting her attention anyway. Sigh. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to bother you, I was just leaving.”

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“No! I mean, no, no that’s entirely alright, I swear.” Zoe wasn’t in the habit of being alone, especially when she spend the majority of her time squished between Lily and Doris whenever possible. That is, whenever she wasn’t tucked in gently into Sirius’ bed, a stupid smile on her face as she huffed another smell of him. Just him. “I’m not really the think in silence sort of person but I figured I’d try it. Apparently I’m rubbish.”

15. what is the weakness that would make you fold in an interrogation

19. how do you do your laundry (how long do you put it off, how long does it sit, do you use fabric softener, take it to the dry cleaners…)

Well, now that you've asked. I tend to be a bit of a mess, to tell you the truth. Mostly my clothes sit in a pile on my floor until I've run out of things to wear, and at that point I shove them in the nearest washing machine (without sorting), and hope for the best. My mum usually enjoys doing my laundry, so I could always take it all to her, but I'd really rather not open that can of worms.

Sirius couldn’t help but frown as Zoe sprinted away: had she even hit him? Or had she merely leapt onto his back and then off again? He shook his head. More fool her if she had wasted a good opportunity for a hit. She wouldn’t get the same treatment from him, he thought, as he ran after her. He’d take any opportunity for a hit he could. 

It was a sweaty hour later that the lights turned back on, signalling the end of their game. The arena looked smaller and less imposing once it was flooded with light. Sirius tugged off the vest he’d put on at the start of the game— it’s job of recording how many times Zoe had got him was done. “Ready to see who picks the place?” he asked her as they headed out. 

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She practically dragged herself out of the arena. Worn out and wrung dry. How long had they been in there? How much had she unnecessarily run around acting a fool? They were questions that were far too difficult to answer, and therefore, Zoe merely focused on how excellent Sirius looked all sweaty. “Just so long as you make it good. If you just end up shoving me into a broom cupboard, I am absolutely going to be annoyed at you.”

Zoe sort of assumed the winner.

Sirius near about had a heart attack. A hand went flying to his chest as he let out a stream of words that wouldn’t at all have been appropriate if it was the weekend and the place were full of children. It took him a few moments to come back to his senses, although his pounding heart took longer to calm fully. “Fucking hell,” he breathed. “You can’t do that in here, in the dark and the quiet. You might actually kill someone. You do know this isn’t how you play?” 

.

Zoe practically cackled as she tumbled back onto the floor, as opposed to mostly on Sirius’ back. “I’m just making sure that you’re prepared for every single situation, Sirius. I mean, who knows what else could be lurking around these corners. Constant Vigilance!” She wasn’t sure where she had heard the term from, but it seemed like the right thing to say given this situation. Only now she said it right before sprinting off in the other direction, cackling like a madman.

Almost wasn’t a heart attack, so Sirius didn’t feel bad laughing as he made his escape. He took another hiding spot, going back on the defence rather than the offence. It was safer to lie in wait, than be the one chasing. He would leave that up to Zoe, letting her come to him. He realised, as he hid, that it had felt like a long time since they’d just had fun. Keeping things secret at the pub about who he was had been stressful, Zoe’s mother was making choices that upset her; both had left things tense between them. But in here, all that had seemed to fade away. The only focus was this game, the bet, who was going to win. 

Sirius realised he didn’t actually care who won. If he lost, he’d still have won. There wasn’t much better than being able to leave all your problems behind for an afternoon. When you threw Hex Tag into that too, what could there be to complain about, even if you lost the game overall. Of course he’d still fight to the end to win, because that was the point of the game, but for the first time in his life he’d take it well if he lost. He settled into his hiding spot, and waited. 

.

Now, she understood the rules. Really, Zoe did. She had paid attention when they were explained, and even now was aware of the fact that you only won if you actually hit your target. Which meant even now, as her eyes slide across dark corners, and fingertips brushed against the edges of the map, she knew that her aim would have to be excellent if she truly intended on coming out on top.

Only, Zoe was also one to create her own games. To win wasn’t necessarily the point, not if she could continue to have fun. It was why, when she spied Sirius, it was his back that she saw, and instead of getting out the plastic wand, she snuck. Feet light against the tacky floor. Breath being held as though submerged underwater.

She had absolutely no intention of actually pulling out the fake wand at all. Instead, she merely jumped, legs propelling her right onto Sirius’ back, her lips right against his ear. “Got you.”

A place like this echoed, which made it harder to work out where sounds were coming from. Sirius had ducked behind a large pile of strategically placed crates, ready to catch Zoe out when she came past. But the thing was, it was difficult to work out when she did or even if she had come past. When he thought she was right beside him, she was on the other side of the darkened arena. When he thought she was on the other side, she was dangerously close for comfort; he certainly would risk too much if he leapt out without a place to run for fast cover, other than where he’d just jumped out from. He had to catch her in the right middle ground, not too far, not too close. Far enough he could make a fast getaway, close enough he’d get a direct hit. 

It happened eventually, just when she let out her whisper, one that was more creepy than anything else. Her voice seemed to echo less than thudding footsteps. Sirius dove out, aiming fast and true, saying, just as his aim hit her square in the chest, “Be careful what you wish for.” After all, she had asked for him to come out. No sooner were the words out of his mouth, he sprinted off, finding a looping path that took him away from this section of the arena. 

.

She shrieked. First out of complete surprise, and then out of a love of the game. The whole point was to tag each other, so she couldn’t exactly be upset, merely shocked. Why? No one could ever say. Zoe did, after all, quite literally ask for it. “Oh!” Thanks to her acting experience, for just a brief flash, she considered playing out a death scene as though she were on stage, and not halfway towards a very sticky ground. She didn’t want to know why it was sticky. Zoe stayed standing.

“Sirius Black you almost gave me a heart attack!” After she got the words out she was silent once more, stalking through the darkness like an apex predator. Or a very spooked bunny. Both descriptions were apt. Not at all in conflict. Only this time, she was determined to pounce on her prey, as opposed to the other way around.

It didn’t take Sirius very long for his eyes to get used to the dark. Maybe that had something to do with all the nights spent sneaking around in places he wasn’t meant to be sneaking around. He dove into the arena, picking a right hand path when a choice came up, Hex Tag wand held offensively out in front of him. In truth, he didn’t care about a silly bet, win or lose, it was just fun. The big kid in him ran free as he snuck around corners and ducked behind pillars and random junk placed around the arena for hiding spots. So when he barrelled down a path and found himself face to face with Zoe and her Hex Tag wand, he took it well, taking the hit with a laugh. Still, he couldn’t help but say, “That I gave you for free,” even if it wasn’t true, before diving away to hide somewhere in wait for her this time. 

.

Her only response to Sirius was a quick victory dance, which was too soon to actually do, given that it had merely been one hit. Not nearly enough to win a full game. But Zoe always celebrated the quiet victories in life. Finding more and more that they were always far more important in the grand scheme of things. If she couldn’t find joy here, then when?

Just as quickly as Sirius had arrived, he disappeared like a phantom back into the shadowy corners of the arena. Zoe stalked around, ducking and dodging, even if there was nothing to duck or dodge from. It was only when she came to a particularly dark corner of the map that her heart rate truly began to speed up, thumping inside her ribs with a brutal intensity. “Come out, come out wherever you are,” Zoe half-whispered, hoping it sounded at least a little terrifying.

Sirius didn’t reply, at least not with words. He merely smirked in Zoe’s direction, his Hex Tag wand held out ready, and vanished into the dark arena. His time was better spent getting a good headstart. 

.

Zoe sprinted off into the dark, nearly colliding with a wall immediately. With the buzzing in her head mostly gone away after the miss, she was now doing her best at pretending as though she were a secret agent. A spy. Something cool, and sneaky. Maybe in another life she could be a cat burglar. Aloof and twisted. In this life, she was merely a girl who had a hard time keeping herself from laughing. This was ridiculous. This was insane. How was anyone supposed to keep quiet for any amount of time?

She hid behind a pillar, catching her breath and keeping herself still. An accomplishment. While Zoe had never been dreadfully confident with a wand, the Hex Tag one felt better in her hand. Less capable of accidental destruction. So when she heard footsteps, or what she presumed were footsteps, she merely pointed and prayed.

Sirius was steadfast, hand still out in front of him. He shook his head. “I don’t know how this shit works, I’m not a scientist, but I’m also not stupid.” He could actually be very stupid, but that was beside the point. “Kissing is for later. For now we’re enemies.” Of course, kissing the enemy could be very fun, but again, that was beside the point. He’d said what he’d said, and now he had to stubbornly stick to it.

.

“I’ll see you on the battlefield, Black. I’ll be the one winning.” Whether that ended up true or not, she thought it sounded very serious and almost threatening. As though there was enough confidence to actually inflict a winning round. Win or lose, she knew she had already technically won. She had him, didn’t she?

Sirius took a dramatic step back from Zoe, hands coming up in front of them to act as a barrier between them. “I don’t fraternise with the enemy. How do I know you haven’t got— poison lipstick on? Make me all woozy or some shit so you can win?” 

.

“Hey! If I put poison lipstick on myself, wouldn’t I be the woozy one here? It’d sink into my skin or something, and then I’d be even worse off than I usually am. Can’t a girl just ask for an innocent kiss from her boyfriend. I mean really, Sirius. How dare you.”

“Not to worry, pet. I have eyes like a hawk.” With a swish and a flick the box was floating down to her. She handed it off to the other girl to carry without thinking much about it. “Do you know where the pieces go? If you’d like to set it up on one of the tables I can fetch more players.” The commotion was growing louder down the hall, and so was Narcissa’s determination to ignore it lest it reveal a nasty, fearful truth that would be less pleasant than playing a simple game and waiting for real help to arrive.

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“Yes. Good, I’ll figure out where everything goes. We can make a tournament of it.” She smiled softly, hoping it did well at hiding her own anxieties and hesitations about the situation. At the very least, Zoe had learned that Narcissa possessed no horns that she could see, though there was something unpleasant about the tilt of her chin, and the calm of her voice. As though she knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that she would always be correct in her view of the world. For now, they could play at friends. Disaster had a way of doing that.

“Perhaps we’ll come up with a whole new one all our own if it so happens that we have to improvise the rules we’ve forgotten.” The metaphor of which passed her by. “Ah ha!” Narcissa cried at last in delight, pointing to the tippity top of the cupboard where a battle-worn cardboard box lay, stored precariously and apparently in haste.  

.

Her relief was likely palpable, not helped along by a shriek she heard from another room from a person she couldn’t easily name. They were all mostly strangers here, save for Lily and Doris, of which Zoe was grateful to have them during this. But they weren’t here right now, face to face with Narcissa, begging for something to go right.

“Oh! Brilliant! Excellent eye at spotting that. I would’ve likely kept walking on by, completely oblivious.”