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âď¸ âa friend like meâ - quick kalim analysis (i lied i thought it was going to be quick but it wasnât)
a recent compilation by @yuurei20 on twitter and bluesky piqued my interest, so i had to go back into the stories mentioned to see if thereâs anything specific on the context of the mentioned situations. warning for book 7 jpn spoilers!
kalimâs definition of âfriendshipâ is explained in book 7 and in previous personal stories (explained later) where he considers others as âfriendsâ if they helpr him, and himself to them if he helps them. if it isnât noticeable yet, the thematic reason why kalim has such a loose idea of friendship is because it is based on the genieâs idea of friendship. in the genieâs perspective, he is a friend to aladdin (âfriend like meâ) because he is able to do things for him. after aladdin promises him that he will free him, the genie starts referring to aladdin using casual nicknames that are synonymous with the word âfriendâ (buddy, pal, etc) (and yes, i did check, it was only ever aladdinâs name or âmasterâ before this promise).
there are a few unique situations that the game touches on and some of it is more obviously written than others.
1. normal (for kalim standards) (emphasis on âfor kalimâ + a projection onto jamil) friendship-making
this is the situation that we see the most, and itâs mostly based on, again, kalimâs loose standards for what constitutes as a friend or not.
the one in jamilâs ceremony robes is one i wanted to touch base with the most, because although he has a loose definition of friendship for himself, he uses the proper word to describe other people knowing another person (âacquaintanceâ).
âknowing each otherâ is the logic that kalim uses to describe acquaintance, which is the correct definition, as he uses the same logic to come to the conclusion that sebek may also know silver. when sebek mentions that he and silver were taught alongside each other by lilia as fellow pupils, kalim mentions that âsilver and i are in the same classâ. i know itâs a simple way of explaining their friendship, but itâs nice that sebek mentioning that sebek and silver were taught alongside each other got kalim to mention the same context between his friendship with silver (theyâre in a class together = taught alongside each other).
itâs here when kalim then starts to suggest that âyou and I should be friends too!â meaning that, like silver and kalim, sebek and kalim should be friends as well. this is taken out of the Japanese version of the card, where kalim only mentions that him and silver get along great in class without implying a desire to be friends with sebek. ill explain later why it might have changed. (on a side note, i find it really interesting that kalim was smiling during jamilâs lecture after this until jamil tells him âi keep telling you not to trust new people so easilyâ, considering that the only one kalim says he trusts is jamil. i might talk about what the differences are in their definitions of trust in another post) (on another side note, kalim mentioning âsebek wasnât even a spy!â implies that was a possibility he was thinking of).
last thing: kalim says âwho cares which dorm heâs from? we know his name and weâve chatted. that makes us friends! and friends help each other outâ to try to convince jamil to help out sebek. Iâve mentioned this a few times in other posts, but kalimâs specific idea of friendship (polished and finetuned by the narrative) is based on reciprocal deeds. these can lead to helping each other out, but initially they donât always start off that way. this might mean that exchanging words is a reciprocity that kickstarts kalim into treating the other person as a friend. sebek wasnât an assassin or âeven a spyâ (aka, ulterior motives, which, to kalim, would mean that the exchange of words and value in those words wouldnât be reciprocal) (more on this later), so by kalimâs standards, sebek is a friend. however, there is one problem with this interpretation from the story.
there is a time between when kalim says âwe should be friendsâ, which means the idea of being friends with the other person isnât true presently but could be true later; versus when kalim says âthat makes us friends!â. but during this time, kalim and sebek donât exchange any more words - the conversation happens between solely kalim and jamil, or jamil and sebek. you can go back and see for yourself! this is potentially one of the reasons why the former line was added into the official english translations, because one more thing changes later on.
with this, there is a big implication that kalim was projecting his idea of friendship onto jamil in that moment; he wasnât describing his friendship with sebek at the time, but jamilâs friendship with sebek. (pronouns in Japanese are vague). jamil should help sebek because he is friends with him, and if jamil wonât go, then kalim will go instead to help jamil out. this is also implied when kalim describing his relationship with sebek uses the term âschoolmatesâ rather than âfriendsâ to describe himself helping out sebek:
id like to note that the term âschoolmateâ isnât used in the japanese version. kalim doesnât specifically say a term for what he calls sebek in this moment. again, the original japanese version of the card leaves things vague on who is referring to what. it could be true that they wanted to translate that ambiguity into the official english translation of the card by subtly showing the difference between how kalim wanted to be friends with sebek but didnât do much after he mentions it to pursue the friendship, and how kalim thinks of sebek as a schoolmate but sees jamil and sebek as friends because theyâve chatted together more than him.
to summarize the logic: kalim would like to be friends with sebek, understands he is just schoolmates with him, but believes that jamil is friends with sebek. unlike when he calls himself sebekâs schoolmate to justify himself helping him out, he persuades jamil to go help sebek because they are friends. if jamil doesnât go to help, kalim will go instead, because jamil and kalim are friends and kalim should help jamil out if he canât do something. kalim, later on, understands that he âbasically forced jamil to walk him back and allâ, so followed after them to make sure they were getting along.
if it helps to add context to his behaviour, kalim sees jamil as a brother, and kalim has a lot of younger siblings. he is practically obsessed with making sure jamil had good relationships with other people (âŚdoesnât this sound like both of our favourite matchmakers in aladdin) (im talking about the sultan and genie here) (i need to make a compilation of parallels between them and how itâs relevant to kalimâs character). lab coat was also a thing where the main objective of throwing the party for jamil in the beginning was to get him to bond with other people. (good job kalim for understanding that codependency between you and jamil is a problem) (or heâs getting tired of jamilâs own micromanaging lmao). this pops up again in the nbc event when he encourages jamil to make friends with students from other schools. that was potentially his objective here, which is why he then follows the both of them to see if theyâre getting along, despite him forcing jamil to go along (and kalim himself acknowledging this).
2. implications of times where his interactions with other people didnât mean they were interacting as friends (or an initial desire to be friends from kalimâs end)
this is unlike sebekâs situation, where kalim says he wants to be friends with sebek or is implied to want to be friends with sebek but didnât get a chance to form a proper friendship outright, but understands that he might be able to later on. to my knowledge, this specific situation only ever happened once, and the only time it happened, itâs acknowledged as a thing of the past that kalim would like to change - and is mostly a result of the type of people both Kalim and the other are.
i wonât explain everything because you can deduce for yourself how kalim thinks of riddle, but back to the idea of âfriendshipâ and reciprocity - kalim mentions to riddle that âyou donât have to take everything upon yourself either, you know. if you ever need help, you can always come to meâ implying that it is very unlikely for riddle to start the âfriendship-making processâ by asking for help. when kalim does try to help riddle out by giving him advice, riddle is always against it: âmust I stand here and take advice from YOU?!â is a repeated statement from him twice in the same personal story.
conversely, in riddleâs gym story, when kalim does offer to help by offering to be his partner, and gets help from riddle when he forgot his running time, in both instances, riddle reacts rather poorly and kalim notices it/acknowledges it with a small âhm?â from him. i have a summary of kalimâs opinions of riddle based on these two stories lying around in my docs that i need to post, but to be frank, he didnât consider him as a friend before kalimâs school uniform story. for more proof, back to said school uniform story: kalim runs off after getting his ingredients, but runs back to tell riddle that he should come to the banquet because theyâre âboth sophomore housewardens, so itâs about time they hung out as friendsâ. this implies that, although kalim interacted with riddle in situations before this, learnt his name, and chatted, in very few or none of those situations was the context âas friendsâ to kalim. this further adds to the idea that kalimâs idea of friendship - âwe talked and are now friendsâ - was him encouraging jamil to be friends with sebek by projecting an idea of friendship onto jamil and wasnât actually an indicator of how he makes friends or sees his relationship with sebek himself.
coming from kalim, not being considered his friend sounds very harsh at first, but you have to remember he naturally doesnât trust other people and had to make a conscious effort and change to begin trusting others enough to not scare himself at the dinner table. and this only came about because he actively worked on detecting poisons himself. and even with this, he still hates eating by himself.
speaking of, this is exactly what the game tries to emphasize in the same story when kalim, rather rudely than normal when it comes to denying food from other people, tells riddle not to bother with bringing food to the banquet. even though they can start hanging out as friends, they initially come from a place where they didnât, so kalim still canât trust whether the food riddle brings will be poisoned or not. but riddle, who didnât catch the initial âooc momentâ, or the second one for that matter, also didnât catch this conclusion. the conclusion he did catch is only what the readers at the time needed to know - that kalim was possibly poisoned. itâs framed this way (narrative-wise) for both the readers who look into kalimâs character - which at this point, would be none at all considering this is his very first card - and for new readers. which is incredibly perfect writing and i wish the events and newer stories would try to do some of this when balancing out ânew readers who didnât experience main story vs old veteransâ, especially when it comes to scarabia⌠anyway, expanding on the former idea, itâs like a lot of kalim things where itâs encouraged by the narrative to look back at these moments in hindsight to understand it (aka every single one of his lucky breaks in events where something he did previously led to a lucky moment in the end).
this card is probably one of the purest instances where, although kalim treats someone as a friend, he still keeps an armâs length emotional distance from them. his idea of friendship is very loose, but doesnât necessarily mean - or maybe because it doesnât necessarily mean - he regards everything the other does with utmost faith and trust. heâs positive, yes, but just like the development of his relationship with riddle, it wasnât always that way. to a certain degree, describing him solely with his positive and generous nature when it comes to his idea of friendship still might not be entirely accurate either.
3. being told who he becomes friends with
the situation of âbecomingâ friends with fellow and gidel is an interesting situation because it was influenced by the people around him. before the group agreed to a temporary truce to help fellow out (again, back to the idea of âhelping each other outâ as a key standard for Kalimâs general standards of friendship), kalim then says that heâs always wanted to be friends with fellow and gidel. this implies a similar situation like sebekâs, where kalim recognizes a desire to be friends with someone, but never really got the chance to in full. you can tell when this is the case vs when itâs not depending on the vocabulary and terms kalim uses, which is why this is different from riddleâs situation, where this wasnât vocalized in their conversation with each other.
i donât have much to say on this one, but it is a thing that happened! so itâs important to mention. he didnât actively start thinking of fellow and gidel as friends until this truce was made and approved by other people, which is a different situation in general. a lot of the other times we see kalim refer to someone as friends either 1. makes sense for his character, or 2. projects his idea of friendship onto someone else.
i hope this (supposed to be short but is now long) post made it a little easier to understand kalim! if i missed any other special situations let me know :D