Oh me, oh my... ✰

˗ˏˋ ★ About the blog

This is a writing blog for Genshin and HSR for now (I'll mainly post HSR, probably). I do yandere as well as a little non-yandere, headcanons, smut, internet garbage, so on and so forth ☆

This is a writing blog that partially focuses around yandere content (mostly that), both SFW and NSFW. This means that my works will include noncon/rape, psychological and physical torture and other heavily dark topics. In other words, a lot of stuff I write will be dead dove (meaning work that contains morally questionable topics where they are not presented as condemnable, in case you're unfamiliar). If these are topics that you do not want to see and/or are very sensitive to, please refrain from reading any further. Everything will be tagged accordingly.

Minors (under the age of 18), do not interact with my NSFW content. I obviously can't stop you, but for your own sake, be careful with what sort of media you consume. I would heavily prefer for my followers to have their age in their bio, and I require that of you if you are to message me. I base my anon interactions and such trusting the fact that you are at least eighteen years old, and if you want to become an emoji anon or someone I talk to regularly in other ways, you must be a legal adult.

I WOULD HEAVILY PREFER IT if you sent NSFW asks off-anon and with your age somewhere visible. Naturally, you must be at least 18 years old to discuss anything NSFW on my blog in general, and by interacting with such posts, you're agreeing to claiming to be of age.

This shouldn't even have to be said, but for the record, my works do not reflect reality. Any of the heinous actions I describe in my writing I heavily condemn in real life, and you obviously should too. Everything I write is a work of fiction.

DO NOT feed my work into any AI. This is non-negotiable.

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˗ˏˋ ★ Before you interact

THE NSFW SIDE OF MY BLOG IS STRICTLY 18+. DO NOT INTERACT IF YOU ARE UNDER 18. In addition, I would not recommend reading ANY my works if you have trouble distinguishing fiction from reality. This includes being of the opinion that noncon fantasies are immoral or wrong.

Do not share my works on other platforms (THOUGH THIS CAN BE NEGOTIATED, send me a DM or an ask!). It may very well expose minors or people who do not want to see this sort of stuff to my content.

Like, reblog, comment, ask and follow all you want — or don't, if you're not that kind of a person, it's all okay! However, if you're feeling shy about it, don't overthink it! Even if a post is years old, it's nice to see that someone is reading them, whether that's via a simple heart or a wall of analytic text in the comment section. I sometimes get super shy about leaving likes and such, but I promise that it's (almost) always a positive for the writer, regardless of the person! I promise I won't stalk your blog ( ˶˘ ³˘)♡

Also, if you got inspired by me and want to write something of your own, DO IT! Tag me in it, ping me, I'm dying to read it. Go ham.

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˗ˏˋ ★ Sending in asks

I take suggestions! Long and short form content are both alright. Note that if you don't specify it in the ask, I'll assume that the request is for dark content! Have a read at the rules before sending anything, please. Moreover, I will pick and choose what I want to write, depending on how I'm feeling, who I'm invested in at the moment, etc., so I unfortunately can't promise that I'll write every request that comes in.

Brainstorming and good vibes are also very much welcome, so please don't hesitate to slide me an ask! I read every one of them even if I don't publish them (❀´ ˘ `❀)

Regarding the asks: If you have a question that you'd like to have answered in a Ririchat, I'm gonna get to it much quicker (most likely in the next post) if you don't send it along with a request! I keep requests in another folder and don't publish them until/if the request has been answered, so please send them separately if that's what you're after!

Also, if you send in a Ririchat ask, note that you won't get a notification when I've answered it like normal because of the chat format being based on screenshots. But, your ask is always answered in the next Ririchat that comes after sending it! Let it be noted that depending on what's popping in my life outside of Tumblr, my updates may be really slow.

Things that are okay to send in:

Requests and ideas for writing! Be as specific or as non-specific as you want, don't stress it! If I resonate with the idea, I might cook something up (and even if I don't, I read all of them!!) (ㅅ´ ˘ `)

Feedback! If there's a specific piece of my writing you particularly enjoyed, or there was something that made you boom-shakalaka, let me know! I love to hear people's thoughts on my work. THOUGH, please be gentle with me if it's criticism ૮(˶ ╥﹏╥) ა

Grammar mistakes in my work! PLEASE, let me know if you find any. Google Docs can only offer so much when it comes to the English language, so if you happen to stumble upon one, send it in!

Questions! About my writing, about me, your math homework, anything goes! I'll respond to them to the best of my ability in the Ririchat-posts. If you have a burning question in your mind but you're super-duper shy, you can try searching for an answer from the older chats, too! My DMs are also open for this purpose.

General thoughts! Anything. Literally send in anything that's even remotely relevant.

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˗ˏˋ ★ What I will write

I currently write for Genshin Impact and Honkai Star Rail. I might broaden my horizons in the future if something interesting comes up! Note that I nearly exclusively write for men. I might indulge myself in the women every once in a while, though.

✅ Things I will write and topics you may and will see in my posts. Feel free to send asks about these!

Noncon (will be in the majority of my smut posts)

Physical and mental abuse of the reader

Anal

Sounding

Mental health issues (depression, anxiety, trauma, etc. SEE MORE AT THE NEXT SECTION)

❌ Things I am NOT into and therefore will not write about. Please do not send me asks about these topics!

Incest, including pseudo

Scat and other lower gastrointestinal organs involving things (in any context), vomit (in a sexual context), urine (may be crossed into since I write sounding)

Yandere!Reader

(Heavy) body mutilation and gore (this goes case-by-case. I’m alright with breaking bones and cutting but not gauging out eyes, etc. Best not to send if unsure)

Distinct self-harm (cutting, for example. This area may be crossed into in my posts, but please don't send in asks about it). This doesn't include so-called passive self-harm (reader being generally reckless in her decisions that indirectly causes them to get hurt)

Eating disorders (this one may be crossed into as well)

Hyperspecific mental health symptoms, essentially specific diagnoses

Specific disabilities on reader: Reader being deaf, blind, or having a bodily difference, for example. I know this would be a pleasant topic for some of you to read, but it's not something I'll write due to not being able to properly relate to such things, and describing things like that in such a heavy context with less-than-satisfactory accuracy is most likely not something you would like to see me write regardless

Specific appearance-related features on reader such as skin colour, height or body shape

Hyperspecific habits on reader that have very little effect on anything yandere-related. Essentially things that very few people would relate to, for example: Reader whose favourite food is this or that, reader who does a specific hobby or sport, or reader who works in a very specific field

Reader's family members being described in detail or as relevant characters. I know this is a very niche one but I personally don't want to bring the concept of my family anywhere near my yandere universe

Reader having a distinctly and severely poor self-esteem (think verbally berating their own looks or such). I know this is a particularly sensitive topic for some and terribly enticing for others, but I myself am of the firm belief that the more you say the negative things out loud (or in this case, read it), the more you'll start to believe them to be true. I do not want to think of myself that way, but above all, I don't want any of view to view yourselves in that light. ♡

Killing relevant characters (including suicide of reader)

Daddy kink (specifically the daddy part)

Distinct, large age gap between the yandere and reader, no matter in which direction

Distinct age on reader

Ships (my posts may cross into this territory, though)

Character!Reader (ex. Stelle!Reader. However, thing like Nameless!Reader is alright)

Male!Reader

When it comes to smut, I only write cisfem!Reader. I find that trying to keep things sex neutral when utilizing the downstairs restricts me to the point where I wouldn't be able to write everything I want on the page

Sexually dominant reader

Explicitly virgin!Reader, I don't really want to contribute to the beliefs that typically come with the concept

Somnophilia (although might be crossed into)

Pregnancy and breeding

(Heavy) Stockholm syndrome, I like my darling feisty! This is a little difficult to limit since yandere writing always has at least the tiniest bit of Stockholm syndrome (by definition), but I generally don't write darlings that are "agreeable" with the yandere, enjoy what is being done to them, or "love" the yandere back. This goes for mind break, too. Note that I write the reader to be quite gutsy in general, the level varying from post to post!

Reader being generally affectionate towards the yandere unless in a non-Stockholm-syndrome context. This relates to the above point, but it's a little difficult to regulate due to the gray area. I'm relatively lenient on this one, but be aware that if this is something you're wishing to send in, there's a good chance I won't answer it!

Reader explicitly enjoying anything sexual done to them in a punishment purpose

Reader being irredeemably and permanently "broken". The darling stays FEISTY even though she might have a few moments of weakness

Suicidal thoughts

I should mention that cum play and such is not my thing but I do accept asks that mention jizz in general if it's not related to breeding

If you're on the fence about whether or not these apply to something you'd like to send in, you can ask me directly! However, present that in question form, not in a full-on suggestion form because the latter I might not answer if it ends up breaking my rules!

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I write for the majority of (male) characters in both Genshin and HSR. Therefore, it's easier to list characters I won't do.

Characters I will NOT write for:

Genshin

Bennett

Chongyun

Xingqiu

Freminet

Gaming

Razor

Durin

In addition, I don't have particular interest in writing Baizhu, Itto, Mika and Ororon, but they're not completely off limits

I have personal beef with Kaeya

HSR

Misha

Yanqing

Archer

Luka (for now, at least, because I don't know his character at all. I'm procrastinating on his quest)

I don't have particular interest in Arlan

In addition, I refuse to write explicitly underage or child-like characters in any sexual context. In these games, the ages are not canon, so I will go case-by-case, but obvious ones include children like Klee, Qiqi and Clara.

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˗ˏˋ ★ Things to note

About the reader

As you most likely know, character x reader content is based on you imagining yourself in the reader's place. For me, the same goes for the writing process: I write the reader with an image of myself in mind. Therefore, certain things are assumed about the reader. Unfortunately, it would be near impossible to write anything if I were to try to please everyone, so I've gathered the base frame of the reader here.

These include:

reader being a cisgender female by default (a vagina and boobs, she/her). This will be tagged in every post.

reader having hair (long enough to be pulled, for example). There won't ever be explicit descriptions of the reader's hair beyond that (length, texture, colour) unless stated otherwise in the tags.

reader being in objectively good physical health unless stated otherwise. This includes reader being able to run, swim, and put up a fight, for example. When it comes to the smut, the default is that the reader is able to come.

reader being smaller in stature compared to the taller characters (Mydei, Jing Yuan, Wriothesley...). When it comes to the reader's size and shape, I'll refrain from using any descriptions to the best of my ability. I myself am lean, quite short and relatively small-chested, so I operate on that image, but if possible, there won't be any mentions of things like the reader's weight.

Finally, I can't really think of a situation where this would be actually relevant in my writing, but I'm white (a Nordic princess to be exact ( ¯ ³¯)⋆꙳❅*❆). Hence, naturally, I view the world through my own culture's lens, and there may be instances where that bleeds into my works. If I'm successful at avoiding it, there will never be any explicit mentions about the reader's skin colour, their race, or their culture in any context, but if something does slip through, it is because of the aforementioned reason.

There will be posts where none of these traits come up, and there will be ones where some of them do. I will not tag these individually since they are quite vague (however, stuff like hairpulling and manhandling and so on are tagged, of course). Everybody, regardless of gender, appearance or background is absolutely welcome to read my works, but the reader-insert’s defaults are something to be aware of; especially if you’re sensitive about one or more of the mentioned qualities or easily experience dysphoria regarding them.

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˗ˏˋ ★ My tags

Clicking on the link will take you to the respective tag!

#/riri - Introduction posts, masterlists, informative things and so on. #/ririmasterlist - My whopping two masterlists. #/ririshtpost - where I exercise my professional internet hoe rights. #/ririwriting - actual writing posts. Contents and length varies. #/ririchat - tag for posts that aren't writing but aren't flaming garbage either. I post answers to asks and updates about my writing here, for example! These also have life updates and lore bits about me in case you're interested. If you literally couldn't care less, it's probably best to block this one. #/ririthoughts - Tag for shorter, fic-rambling-hybrid answers to asks. Also has shorter thought blurbs. If you'd like for your thought to be included in the Ririthoughts rather than a Ririchat, put this 🌠 emoji at the end of your ask! #/ririgenshin - Genshin-related posts #/ririhsr - HSR-related posts #/riritw:noncon - Noncon tag #/riritw:yandere - Yandere tag #/riritw:smut - Smut tag

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˗ˏˋ ★ My dearest anons!

I take emoji anons! If you'd like one for yourself, just shoot me an ask and I'll confirm the claim in the next Ririchat! PLEASE don't use an emoji without asking first because I think we'd all like to avoid the case of a double identity (ᵕ • ᴗ •)

Taken ones include:

Bling-bling-Anon ✨ Butterfly-Anon 🦋 Crown-Anon (ex Victorian Child Anon) 👑 Bunny-Anon 🐇 Cherry-Anon 🍒 Party-Anon 🎉 Deer-Anon (🎤)🦌 Sushi-Anon 🍣 Lizard-Anon 🦎 Blossom-Anon 🌸 Apple-Anon 🍎 Tutel-Anon 🐢 Cloud-Anon ☁️ Daisy-Anon 🌼 Bubble-Anon 🫧

S-FW

˗ˏˋ ★ 1. General look: How are they like? How do they behave around the darling? Are there any warning signs?

Ashveil has never been known to be a particularly calm person on the daily. Sure, he has moments in the same way the rain might slow down for a moment before picking up again, but as he is now, despite dreaming of retirement, he’s not capable of staying still for long. Furthermore, his occupation is of the kind that requires him to get into all sorts of strange situations ranging from infiltrations to confrontations alike, and hence, it’s no wonder that your first taste of the man would be, to say the least, a reasonably peculiar one. 

You stare the person hiding in the cabinet directly in the eye. It’s what your gaze naturally strays towards first, mostly due to his own, flabbergasted expression. The man, dressed much too lavishly to be a mere burglar, gapes right back at you with his visage resembling that of an emoti caught in a car’s headlights: He doesn’t say a word, doesn’t move an inch, albeit the latter is mostly due to his odd position. He has squeezed himself into the tight space, practically having folded himself in half with the heels of his boots digging into the cabinet’s ceiling.

However, though already utterly ridiculous, the absurdity of the situation hasn’t yet reached its peak. After a few seconds of unbroken eye contact, the showdown is interrupted by some more shuffling at the back of the tight space. A creature — a monkey, to be precise — peeks out from behind the man’s legs to join in on the wordless conversation. Much like its presumed owner, the thing ogles at you with its wide eyes, failing to portray much of anything on its cartoonish features. 

It’s just about enough ludicrosity for you to have witnessed in one day. With your face as deadpan as it could possibly be, you take hold of the cabinet door’s handle and slowly slide it back in place. 

Such is life in Planarcadia no matter where one lives, works, studies, or spends their freetime. It’s not the strangest thing you’ve seen at your job, nor is it anything you would be particularly worried about, even. Sometimes things just happen around — you still remember that one time your coworker came running to you, pointing in the storage area’s direction and exclaiming that the entire pantry had been emptied and was now filled to the brim with Wispae. Or, the time you arrived at work to find that the napkins had all been folded into origamis and were now flying all over the place like a kaleidoscope of butterflies. The frontage of the café has been blown open a handful of times, a ruthlessly fierce guitar battle between a couple of rival gangs has taken place in the middle of the seating area, the tap water once turned bright pink for an entire two days due to some streamer’s mishap... You’ve seen it all. 

So, blinking a few times to rid your retinas of the most perplexing sight of the day, you make your way out of the BOH, back to the service area, and let your colleague at the cash register know that ”there’s some guy in the coffee bean cabinet”. Predictably, instead of being shocked like the situation would perhaps warrant, you’re met with a sigh, an eye roll, and a wearily spoken ”not again”. 

Ultimately, your first encounter with the man is no longer than half a minute at most. He doesn’t catch your name, you certainly don’t catch his, and when you get the security guard to go take a look at the storage area on your behalf, he’s already long gone. It’s as if the encounter never even took place — the hectic everyday life on the planet doesn’t allow you to stop to ruminate on such brushes. The event doesn’t follow you home, either: In customer service jobs, it’s the norm to have strange things happen nearly daily, and as long as you’re not posed to actual danger, you’re willing to look at the oddities of the occupation through your fingers. You go back to work the next day like normal. 

The same could be said about his first impression of you, to a degree. Getting caught in the position he did wasn’t in his plans, by any means: A good detective should never get found out doing their job, but a few mistakes are par for the course here and there. He just didn’t expect for the one to catch him to be so, for the lack of a better word, so captivating. 

You have a pretty face to you; wonderfully lovely features. There’s something so naturally attractive about you: Sure, he has seen his fair share of beautiful people in his long life, and he’s no stranger to stumbling upon one, but this case, your case, in particular ends up leaving him uncharacteristically wonderstruck — so much so that he only realized he should make a run for it when he heard the clinking of the security guard’s keys at the door to the storage area. 

Ultimately, in a few days’ worth of time, neither of you end up reminiscing about the happenstance. He has his own agenda, you have yours, and though he’s a little downbeat about not getting the chance to chat you up, he moves on with his life. That is, until as if scripted by Aha THEMSELF in THEIR relentless thirst for entertainment, the two of you end up bumping into each other again. 

He almost doesn’t recognize you. You look entirely different in your leisure attire: Your hair isn’t clipped back, and the barista apron has changed into a more casual, flowy outfit. In the planet’s ever-colourful masses, you hardly stand out from the crowd, yet when his eyes land on your face, even from afar, he’s locked on to the point that he almost walks straight into a traffic sign. You appear to be heading somewhere, maybe an event of some sort, or a get-together with friends for dinner, but either way, he doesn’t get the image that you’re particularly busy at the moment. 

And oh, he can’t resist. His feet have begun moving even before he has actually thought his actions through. He makes his way along the pavement, across the intersection, confidently heading towards where you’re standing by a signboard on the other side of the street. You’re idling still, tapping away on your phone, typing a message or something of the sort, entirely caught up in your own world, and it’s only when you spot a couple of feet at the top of your field of vision that you raise your gaze from the screen.

Your expression goes from vigilance to puzzlement to suspicion to realization in the span of a mere few seconds as you process the sight. With your phone still in your hand, you squint your eyes and raise your index finger to point at him in a hesitant manner, mumbling out a ”you’re the...?” before properly even understanding where you recognize him from. 

He stands in front of you with a little too obviously excited smile on his features as he tips his hat to you and waits for you to connect the dots. However, as you do, against his optimistic expectations, your face twists into that of mild botheredness: You physically lean back, and the corner of your mouth tugs up in the sort of a half-a-smile that conveys aversion rather than joy. It’s the sort of uneasiness found in a person that doesn’t quite know if the interaction they have been caught in is dangerous in nature or not. 

Though, it takes you but a moment to recompose yourself, after which you briefly clear your throat. fix your expression into a more polite one, and give him a curt ”did you need something?”. 

Ah, he should have thought about what to say beforehand. Coming up with topics for small talk on the spot has never been his forte, yet he channels all of his detective-ness into the tricky interaction, carefully weighing his options, hoping you can’t see the invisible mathematical formulas floating around his skull as he tries to figure out the best course of action. A few, uncomfortably long seconds pass by before he ultimately ends up settling his attention on a trinket hanging on the casp of your bag. 

It’s a small plushie of a cartoon character he doesn’t recognize, but it’s the only subject he can think of latching onto. Yet, in his excitement, he shoots his mouth off immediately: Talking in a cheerful tone, he attempts to impress you by pretending to know the series with zero actual knowledge on it, talking in vague, general terms and clichés and hoping to at least pique your curiosity. ”That’s the main character, correct?” he bats his long lashes at you, gesturing towards the toy with his cane hand. 

It’s not. Rather, it’s an obscure side character you happen to be quite fond of — the sort that has only had a few appearances in the entire show but still managed to steal your heart. You glance at the trinket, then down the street on your side, and let out a tiny, toneless laugh. He doesn’t even need to tap into his intuition to figure out that has hit painfully off the mark. 

Moreover, the devastating social tension aside, you seem... scared. Or, not scared per se, that’s a bit of a strong word, but apprehensive. You’re holding your hands to your chest, you’re subconsciously yet all too clearly leaning away from him, and your gaze flickers to your surroundings every few seconds as if you were actively looking for an escape route. 

Suddenly, he’s acutely aware of his own presence, of how he must appear to you. He didn’t even think to consider the fact, but his mere stature likely feels threatening: After a good few centuries of getting to see the crowns of most people’s heads when he walks around, the consciousness of the difference in size compared to someone of your frame has merely slipped his mind. Following the same train of thought, he can’t help but be unnerved by the morbid realization of just how easy it would be for someone of his build to throw you to the ground like a ragdoll. And, judging by your expression, you’re probably thinking about the exact same thing.

He takes a step back. Immediately, as if you had simply been held back by an imaginary thread, you make use of the window that has opened and promptly excuse yourself with a few mumbled words that he’s unable to make sense of. He follows your form with his eyes as you scuttle down the pavement, unknowingly twisting the knife in his heart even more as you glance back at him to check if he’s following you like he were some pesky stalker. 

He returns home in mixed spirits. On one hand, he’s ecstatic and thanking the stars for getting to see you again, but on the other, he’s horrified at both his own performance and, more importantly, just how aggressively he reacted to the chance encounter. Not “aggressively” as in any way violently — that’s just about the further thing he would like to associate with you — but how intense the minute-long meeting ended up being. It’s like someone had injected laughing gas straight into his jugular the moment he saw you. Lying in the fridge and spending time with his thoughts in the silence of the night, he plays the exchange back in his head and laments the fact that it quite evidently wasn’t among his best works. 

Likewise, when you get back to your apartment, you’re so bewildered by the event that you haven’t even begun to process how you feel about it. Though you understand that the interaction was quite neutral in nature — nothing stranger than what Planarcadia usually has to offer — you can’t help but check that you locked the front door behind you. 

The encounter marks the beginning of an uneasy period in your life. You mull the case over for a few nights, maybe mention it to a friend or a few, yet in the end, just like the first time, your life doesn’t change much: You still go to your job, you carry on with your hobbies, you do what you’ve always done, but in the background of it all, you start to feel like you’re being watched. 

You don’t understand what the cause behind the sudden shift is. At first, you wonder if the cause for the uneasiness is just a regular mood swing — maybe something to do with the stage of your cycle, or perhaps you haven’t been sleeping as well as you could have — but as the unexplainable undercurrent stretches on for days on end, you can’t help but start getting a bit concerned. 

The sensation is completely new to you, and despite only having read about how the gut feeling and one’s sixth sense are very real things, experiencing them firsthand starts affecting your daily mood. It’s the sort of a visceral, shivering feeling one gets when they think there’s something right behind them, or a milder version of the spike of terror right as one sees something flying towards them before the body reflexively attempts to dodge it. The sense comes and goes, and albeit it doesn’t really follow a pattern, there are certain places you feel the most vulnerable in. Your commute — something you used to find quite mundane and even enjoyable from time to time — has now become a matter of counting the metres until the back door of the café has shut behind you or the lock to your apartment has sounded its click. 

The change in your behaviour isn’t a tangible one, at least not at first. Sure, your workmates might raise a brow at your newfound discomfort at lingering around the windows facing the street at the service area, or a friend might question why you’ve recently become so adamant about being home before dusk, but overall, you’re still your normal, relatively functioning self — at least for the time being. 

Of course, the one to blame for the dread is none other than him — albeit partially unwittingly so. He really doesn’t do it on purpose, you see: The vicinity of your workplace simply happens to be a spot he often wanders around, and the block you live in is coincidentally one that a lot of the cases he has been working on have required for him to visit. The fact that he has recently only sought out and accepted jobs near the area is entirely unrelated. 

In but a couple of weeks, the whole thing begins wearing you out. You don’t understand what has gotten into you: There’s nothing in your life that has changed drastically, no major event you could blame the sudden paranoia on, zero instances that you could connect such a harsh change to. You don’t even know what you’re afraid of, what is pushing you to act so paranoid and having you wake up a few times in the middle of the night to the same, strange, inescapable feeling that there’s something wrong. 

But, life at Planarcadia goes on and on, and it certainly doesn’t wait for you to get  back on your feet. Despite your ever-shortening nightly sleep and incrementally shrivelling social life, you get up each day, gather your things, hide a pocket knife into your bag, and go about your day. 

However, the entire ordeal comes to a head a mere month after the bother began. Yet again, you’re at work: The closing hour is nearing, and with only a few customers lingering in the service area, you’re wiping the tables with your coworker when the door chime sings its cheerful melody.

At first, you don’t even react to the ringing — after having worked in the place for a while, the sound has simply become a part of the background noise whenever you’re not at the cash register. However, as you hear an unfamiliar male voice start talking, shivers so violent spike up on the back of your neck that you’re forced to freeze in place with the wet rag still in hand. 

You don’t even know what it is — you don’t recognize the person’s tone, and no comprehensible image pops into your head — but something, something about it is so primally harrowing that your heart begins rushing as if you were being chased. Cold sweat rises onto the back of your neck, and when you part your lips to swipe your tongue over them, the saliva left behind is dry. 

Your colleague takes note of the odd reaction, quirking her brow before joining in on listening to the conversation ensuing around the corner. At first, you almost allow your shoulders to drop back in their place as the interaction seems to follow the usual script of a customer service situation: The man places his order, a little chatty yet still perfectly polite, but the second you hear your own name come out of his mouth is the moment you swear your heart cuts out. 

Springing straight into action, your workmate, albeit obviously addled by the situation, doesn’t need any further context aside from your ghastly expression to grab the reins. Abandoning her rag and spray can on the table, she hisses out a frantic ”down-down-down-down-down”, and when you fail to understand the instruction on time, she plants her hand on the crown of your head and pushes you behind the tables herself. Wordlessly, she brings her index finger to her lips, mouths out a ”shh”, and points at the staff door at the back of the space.

Tears strain at your throat as you crawl between the chairs and table legs, making your way towards the exit on all fours. You’re hardly able to hear the conversation at the cashier desk over your own heartbeat, only managing to make out the ”oh, she’s not here today” explained with what you hope to be enough plausibility to send the man on his way. By the time you finally reach for the handle of the back door and slip into the BOH, your entire body is trembling like a leaf, and even when the last, dreadful 30 minutes of the shift are over and you would be permitted to clock out, the shaking doesn’t stop. Ultimately, you end up sitting in the locker room for a good while past your working hours, just to get your heart to stop racing. 

A simple, singular thought begins occupying much more space in your brain than you would like to give it: You have a stalker. The conclusion isn’t based on any evidence other than the sense of trepidation that has been following you everywhere combined with the incident at the café. You don’t even know who the guy at the register was — ”a tall guy with a white coat and a hat” was the extent of the description of his appearance that your colleague could offer you, and in the culture you live in, such a look could match hundreds if not a thousand of people on the planet. Still, after the event, it’s the aforementioned vague form that begins plaguing your thoughts. You see his silhouette in your mind’s eye; a man with a hat, a pale coat, a cane, black hair, lurking in the bushes in your apartment complex’s back yard, waiting for the perfect moment to ambush you when you leave your house for work, for hobbies, for studies, for groceries, anything. 

Moreover, at this point, no matter how you try to, it’s no use reasoning with yourself that the encounter at the café was a coincidence anymore. Sure, customer service jobs have always had their risks, especially for your sort — it’s basically a weekly occurrence that some creepy guy starts asking around for a specific worker — but the feeling, the feeling won’t leave you alone. Day by day, the dread only grows stronger, and if you weren’t already thinking that your wariness might actually have concrete fuel to it, you sure do now. 

You start staying inside more. It’s nothing special, really: You just haven’t needed that much fresh air recently, nor are you in a dire enough financial situation that doing a little less shifts would hurt your bank account. Besides, you’ve found new ways to entertain yourself in the bounds of your apartment, ranging from reading to scrolling the internet to jigsaw puzzles to cooking to whatever. It’s actually no misery staying inside four walls — even the succulent on your window sill hasn’t wilted too much from getting a little less light through the blinds. 

Of course, it all gnaws on your psyche — regardless of how you put it, you can’t deny the fact that you’re gradually sinking into worrying levels of paranoia. You try to alleviate the fear, you do your best to think rationally about it all, you contemplate on sharing your woes with a friend or few, but as soon as you finish typing the ”this is gonna sound so delusional but” into the text box, you end up erasing the entire message instead. There’s no proof, nothing substantial, and you’re certain that no matter how many comforting words you could be offered, only one response could eventually be read between the lines: “You’re overthinking it”.

In the same manner, one night, as you’ve already been awake way past your bedtime, sitting in your bed with your knees pulled to your chest, restlessly listening to any and all abnormal sounds that could break the quiet of the night, you decide to unlock your phone and take a look at your savings. With anxiety pressing up against your chest, you subsequently make the unconsidered decision of cancelling all your work shifts for the next couple of weeks. The job at the café was just a part-time thing anyway, and in case your state hasn’t gotten any better after the small break, it wouldn’t be that big of a deal to start looking for an entirely new place to work at. Even you yourself understand that your judgement has been clouded by the incessant sense of unease, yet it’s among the few options you could think of that could alleviate the dread. Pulling the blanket over your head to cover your whole body, you put your phone down, let out a shaky exhale, and bury your face in your hands.

Huh, it’s a bit of a shame that you haven’t shown up outside as much as you used to. 

He hasn’t seen you come out of your apartment in quite a few days now, he has noted. The blinds at your window have stayed closed as if there were nobody home, and none of the people that have exited the building have looked even remotely like you. If he wasn’t so certain about having managed to cover his tracks so well, he could almost start thinking that you might have somehow caught on to what he has been up to. 

Truth to be told, you alone have been the light of his life for the past few weeks or so. At first, it felt like a difficult thought to accept: He isn’t used to any grandiose feelings where he’s at in life right now, so admitting to himself that you’ve succeeded in altering his brain chemistry so in such a short time took him a little while. However, now that he has had the time to process his thoughts, he has grown somewhat content with the concept — you’re something he wants, craves, needs. 

He’s surprisingly calm about the whole thing. Whereas some others would already have gone down the spiral of soul-crushing guilt, he doesn’t start questioning his entire identity and morals, nor does he feel the need to try and convince himself that what he feels is real. It just is with him. 

Or, so he thinks — on a conceptual level. If he were to dig any deeper into his own brain, he would come across his morals tied up, gagged and left in a corner where he isn’t able to see them. Of course he knows what he’s doing is wrong on so many levels that he can’t even begin to count them: He’s a pesky stalker, a criminal, the very thing he has sworn to hunt down, yet at the same time, he wants to cling onto the self-given title of a righteous man. Naturally, the two things are in direct conflict with each other, but as long as he keeps the notions apart, he’s able to continue on the path he has chosen to walk with nobody — including himself — getting hurt.

Nevertheless, it’s not like his feelings are entirely unknown to those close to him. Namely, Mister N, his loyal monkey assistant, has seen a great deal of both his highs and lows, and right now, it’s quite apparent to him that what the detective is experiencing is a high of a monumental scale. Obviously, the liking Mr. Ashveil has taken towards a very particular part of the city is quite an apparent sign that something is going on, but the more obvious marker for the change of pace is the way he’s practically floating around with how light his step is. 

The topic is brought up in the midst of the night when Ashveil has already settled into his fridge to have a well-earned rest after wandering along your street the entire day. It’s not often that the two have a deeper chat: Sure, they talk about this and that, mostly related to casual matters and work-related things, or sometimes reminiscing about the past, but nothing beyond such sentiments. Nevertheless, when his assistant airs out the question ”what has excited you so lately?”, a truly rare sort of a conversation ensues. 

”A lady”, is how Ashveil first answers the inquiry, purposefully leaving the matter ambiguous. Still, although he wished he wasn’t so easy to read, the floodgates blast open after a mere few seconds of tense silence. He starts telling Mister N virtually all there is to know about you, how he fell in love with you the moment he saw you, how he hasn’t been able to get you off his mind for the past few weeks, how he’s ”just a hopeless old wolf enthralled by your mere existence”, and how he has been, well, conducting a little detective work on you. 

It’s only as he speaks the things out loud that he himself realizes the true magnitude of just what exactly has been going on. The epiphany is audible in the shape of his voice: Through the fridge door, Mister N can clearly hear how the blissful smile gradually disappears from his features as he recites all he has been going through, slowly but surely drifting from the happy details to a much darker tone. He goes from talking about the cute little trinket on your bag to wondering about how you’ve seemed so agitated lately. It’s like you’re fearing for your life even though there’s no perceivable danger around. Well, other than him, anyway, but he’s not a danger to you, now, is he?

Of course, deep down, he knows it’s him that is the cause behind your restlessness. He has seen the rapid change in your behaviour firsthand; how you went from fairly active to not leaving your home for days on end. Moreover, when Mister N. cautiously suggests that the feelings he’s experiencing could be a cause for concern when taking the ethical standard into account, the only response Ashveil can offer is a pensive ”perhaps so”. As said, being calm about the thoughts in his head is not the whole truth: If he allowed himself to, he could drive himself to the brink and past a mental breakdown with the sheer amount of guilt he has over the situation. But, he won’t — he has always been an it-is-what-it-is sort of a man on the surface, a better-not-to-dwell-on-things-you-can’t-change kind of a person, and most prominently, the-heart-wants-what-it-wants type of a soul. The last of the three is what ends up overpowering his rational mind as well as his morals: If it were anyone else in the shoes he is in, he would show them no mercy — he doesn’t think the feelings he has could ever be put into words nor could they be explained in any means other than going through them oneself — but for they are his and his alone, the only option he’s left with is abandoning his own integrity.  

An abrupt concern about your well-being burgeons in his chest as he lies in the freezing cold. All sorts of mental images of you flood his head: You must be suffering with quite a lot of anxiety, he muses in his mind as he recalls how you looked when he last saw you. Scared is another word that immediately comes to mind, which leaves an even deeper hole in his conscience. You probably don’t even know what it is that you’re so frightened of — a burglar, a murderer, a trafficker... Obviously, he’s none of those things, at least in the present day, but at the same time, he can very much understand the concern. 

It makes him miserable. Miserable, miserable, miserable that he has fallen victim to such a sickness when he was already the sort that has a hard time coping with the loss of his loved ones. He doesn’t even know you — or he does, technically, but not in the sense that the two of you were truly acquainted with each other at any point. All of his knowledge on you, though plentiful, is entirely one-sided; he has practically formed a parasocial relationship with you. 

Still, what he recognizes it all to boil down to is his own selfishness. He’s not the least bit delusional — so much so that when he understands the extent of his own feelings, it’s like he goes through three years worth of therapy in a single second. There’s simply no way around the fact that he needs to have you. 

Thus, he begins reasoning the matter with himself. He’s old, and if everything goes as he wishes, he’s going to be granted the release of falling asleep soon, so what could be the harm in doing a one, last, self-serving thing for himself? It almost feels like some kind of a prophetic reward for his hard work: For just once, he gets to have what he is so desperately craving. For this once, he can’t bear to lose a person like he has lost so many along the years. 

And, who could you possibly be safer with than him? With him, you won’t ever have to fear a burglar, a murderer, a trafficker, anything. Moreover, if he puts his utmost effort into the task, he thinks you may even end up liking the new reality he is about to decide to impose on you: After all, there really isn’t any danger that could get to you when you’re with him.

So, to capsulize the matter, there are plenty of warning signs — so much so that it would be more difficult to ignore them than to take note of them. However, if you’ve never been able to drown out the part of your brain that tells you that it’s you who is the irrational one, his claws will end up reaching you eventually. 

˗ˏˋ ★ 2. Securing: How will they abduct their darling? When, where and how?

He has never been one to ruminate on his options for too long which is quite apparent with how quickly he decides to commit to the desire of “getting you off the streets”. When he arrives at the conclusion that the attraction towards you has built to a point where normal means of courting you wouldn’t prove sufficient — that being around the time you start staying in — he doesn’t really think twice. Yes, he understands that the thoughts spinning around in his head aren’t a hallmark of a sane person, but then again, he has understood for a long time that few notions in his brain could be considered quite up to a mentally healthy par anymore. What’s a little more to add?

The first thing he does — quite literally the first thing, as in as soon as he gets his thoughts in order and himself out of the fridge — is conduct a move to one floor higher in the building. The singular room he’s renting in the Furbobo Headquarters wouldn’t exactly function as a proper place for the two of you to live, both space-wise and, eh, due to his housemates. While he doubts you would enjoy the furbos’ company in the first place, the self-evident, actual reason for the relocation is avoiding getting caught. What he’s about to do isn’t exactly legal, and the creatures certainly don’t have to be witnesses for when he drags an unknown, blacked out lady back home with him. To add, even the move itself isn’t licit: Being tight on money was the original reason which forced him to live in the worn building anyway, so finding a new place to live via legitimate methods isn’t an option. Therefore, as nonchalantly as he’s able to, he carries his few belongings to the unoccupied office one floor higher and begins tidying the shabby suite up. 

In only a few days, the thick layer of dust has been eradicated, the piles of trash and stray items have been sorted in their places, and most importantly, his refrigerator has been carried into the room identical to his prior one’s layout. Sure, the place leaves things to be desired — though it’s roomier in size than your current residence, the pipes are rusty, the couch is worn, and the main room ceiling light doesn’t work — but he’s certain that you’ll just need a little time to get used to the change, and you’ll be quite alright. 

That, and he hopes that the boxes and other trash covering the stairwell access outside are enough of a deterrent for any curious eyes trying to make their way further into the building. If the fact that the landlord hasn’t bothered to make an appearance at his doorstep regardless of all the bills he’s behind on is anything to go by, he’s confident that him making use of the vacant office isn’t that big of a deal. 

Of course, he makes sure the place is ready for you, too. Firstly, whatever little he can change about the apartment’s interior is going to be made to suit your tastes — the direction the couches are facing, the position of the floor lamp, the colour of soon-to-be your toothbrush — and secondly, he has to ensure that you won’t be getting any ideas about slipping away from him. Essentially, he finds a safe stash for the front door’s spare keyfob and puts a padlock on the door chain for good measure, after which he promptly takes the said padlock off because fiddling the thing open every time he himself wants to exit the building proves to be more annoying than he thought. In addition, each and every sharp item is naturally placed somewhere out of your reach, kitchen knives included, and he makes a point to switch the computer’s password to something a little more challenging than the previous ”12345”.

Then, after the most pressing matters are out of the way, he starts thinking about what it is that could make you feel the most welcome in your new home. With the little extra funds he has, he sets off to buy some food you like — you know, the one he has seen you carry home from the market as a treat for the weekend a few times — and sets everything ready for your arrival. After that, the only thing missing is the main attraction itself. 

You remain more or less blissfully unaware of just how dire the danger you’ve gotten yourself into is until the zero hour strikes. The time of your abduction is essentially dependent on one factor only, that being when you decide to finally leave your house after isolating for days on end. Sooner or later, you have to get out of the house for basic necessities and other errands, but the reason doesn’t really make a difference for him — all that matters is the fact that you’re out in the open, and he’s prepared to catch you when you least expect it. 

The unease is almost unbearable, both for you and for him, albeit for entirely different reasons. After four whole days of waiting, hidden amongst the vegetation in your apartment complex’s yard, he watches the front door of your building open, and this time, instead of just another random resident, the form he catches sight of is a familiar one. 

You look left and right, then again, again, again, again, and only then do you dare to take the first step over the threshold. 

The day is just like any other: The weather is balmy, the Phantasmoon is gazing upon you, and there aren’t any people in sight in the relatively placid neighbourhood. The lack of a crowd has you both relieved and nervous: You didn’t expect there to be much traffic in the area in the middle of the noon, but the lack of eye witnesses is still unnerving. Though you have your phone, some pepper spray and the knife for good measure, your heartbeat still mirrors your stressed state. Nevertheless, clutching the handles of the empty grocery bag in your hand, you decide to swallow your unease and close the building’s front door behind you. Once more, you scan the surroundings with your, after which you finally begin crossing the yard. 

Around halfway through the way to the pavement, you think you spot movement in the corner of your eye. The bodily response is immediate: Your heart lurches, an ice-cold shockwave spreads all the way down to your fingertips, yet the scare quickly resolves itself as you recognize the blocky shapes of a bunch of wispae roaming around the garbage cans by the hedge. 

You allow yourself a singular moment free of anxiety to adore the endearing creatures. They’re golden in colour and around the size of your fist, and you can’t help but want to pick one up to hold. It would be like cradling a piece of jelly, yet warm and full of life; the mere thought has the corners of your mouth turning up for what might just be the first time in days. 

It’s something you never get to do, however. 

Your sixth sense picks up on the impending danger before any of the rest even have a chance to react. Suddenly, all the ambient noise of the environment shuts down, and an eerie atmosphere settles over the entire yard. You freeze in place mid-step, nearly dropping your bag, and stop to process abrupt change, but when your brain finally reconnects to your body and commands you to sprint back to the door, the doom has already caught up to you. In your last waking moment, a metal-clad hand invades your field of vision from behind, and the next second, an inky, dark maroon veil builds up at the edges of your eyes. You think you try to speak, to scream, to do at least something to beg the world around you to please help you before the entity then strangulates your consciousness whole. 

──── ✶ ────

The sensation — or rather, the lack thereof — of drowning in the darkness that surrounds you from all sides is strangely comforting, yet all the more distressing. It’s as if time had sped up and slowed down at the same time. Distant, eldritch noises screech at your ears as they pass by, bringing flashes and splatters of bright red to occasionally disturb the currents of the void you’re sinking into. 

However, you don’t get to linger in the nullity for long. A fraction of a second, an hour, a day, years — you don’t know how much time you have spent in the pitch-black embrace, but as the murk suddenly retreats, you snap back to reality in the blink of an eye. 

At first, you don’t realize the position you’re in. You wake up in the middle of a dim apartment, so drastically different to where you remember being last that for a moment, you don’t think you’ve woken up at all. There’s still a faint buzzing in your head, a tiny blur in your eyes, and in your disoriented state, you attempt to stand up from where you’re sitting. 

Your limbs refuse to move. Or, more precisely, your hands are bound, and so are your legs. As you take a second to blink and reanalyze the situation, you understand that you have been tied to a chair: Wrists, ankles, thighs, waist — you’re stuck to the metal, entirely helpless. 

A click sounds through the dim space as a lamp is turned on at your side. The room is illuminated in a warm, dusty glow that barely reaches the nooks of the place. Slowly, you turn your head towards the source of the distraction.

The hat. The hat, the white jacket, the... 

Never once in your life has your stomach turned as suddenly and violently as it does now. You recognize the man standing by the torchère with a single look: Your eyes travel from the brooch on his chest and the metal patterns on his sleeve to the soft, unassuming smile on his pale features. In the very same moment, the memory of your encounters floods your mind in pristinely clear pictures, the puzzle pieces click together, and every last detail about your weeks-long torment begins making sense. Your gazer grows dull. 

You wonder how your corpse is going to look when it’s found. Looking at him, you try to gauge what sort of macabreities the man might be into just as a mental image of your own, bloodied and cold remains intrudes your thoughts. Your mind, having already been pushed to its very limit, feverishly tries to think of any possible ways to evade your impending fate while simultaneously attempting to come to terms with its own, untimely death. Failing to fight off the tears gathering in your eyes, you lower your chin and rest your blurry gaze in your lap. 

The man leaves his spot next to the wall. The clack of his heels echoes around the room as he approaches you, adjusting his hat and briefly dusting off the breast of his overcoat. He crouches in front of the chair, leaving a small bit of distance between the two of you, bordering the limit of invading your personal space yet already much past what you would be comfortable with. 

”My name is Ashveil”, his deep, gentle voice breaks the suffocating silence that has lingered in the apartment. He shifts forward a tiny bit and tilts his head to the side, in search of your gaze. You don’t dare even glance at the man, staying as still as possible in favour of prolonging the calm before the bloody storm, even as his piercing, gray eyes appear at the top of your field of view. 

Your entire body twitches so forcefully that the chair rocks back when he rests his palm over your knee. Carefully, slowly, he caresses the spot in what he, no doubt, means to be a comforting manner, yet the reaction he elicits is anything but. You attempt to swallow down the thick lump in your throat, but the tears straining at your windpipe won’t allow it to go down, and all that ends up slipping out of your mouth is a tiny, high-pitched sob. 

He lets out a breathy, fazed sound, and his hand pulls back as if having been startled. His eyes remain on your face for a moment longer, observing your ashen features and quivering lower lip, until he then stands up and leaves your sight. You listen to the sound of his steps as he circles the chair before stopping right behind you. 

His hands find your hair. Your shoulders jump at the sensation of the cold metal making contact with the back of your neck, yet this time, he doesn’t seem to mind the plainly averse reaction. Carefully, he gathers your hair over to your back’s side, sliding the strands curtaining your face behind your ears and smoothing down the crown of your head with a few pats. Then, setting his hand over your shoulder, he bends to the side to be able to see your now bared expression.  

”How are you feeling?” he asks you in the same, calm yet much too cheerful of a tone, circumstances considered. ”A little groggy?” 

Truthfully speaking, though he takes care to keep his voice down and even, he’s bursting with excitement. Not only because, well, he has you here now, but because he has always wanted to do this sort of a thing. Getting to play a part in a film-esque interrogation scene has been on his bucket list for a long time now, and the setting is just perfect for that sort of a thing — although, obviously, he’s not interrogating you at all. The parallel has a bit of a comedic value to it, he muses, yet he makes sure to keep that part of his thoughts away from the situation at hand. 

Continuing on the same track, he keeps the one-sided conversation going and proceeds to inquire whether the bindings are too tight. If he were to be asked, he would say he’s doing a relatively good job, yet even in your horror-struck state, it’s quite easy for you to see how utterly maladroit the small talk he’s making an attempt at is. You don’t even understand what his aim is; prolonging the suffering of one’s victim with faux sympathy is something even the most famous killer in all of Planarcadia didn’t bother to do. Why he wants to torture you so, you don’t know, and as a fresh wave of tears pushes its way past your wavering pretence of composure, you can’t think of anything other to do than mumbling out a meek, weepy ”just fucking kill me”. 

His face falls. His hand, previously on your shoulder, retreats back as if he had laid it on a hot stovetop. Taking a few steps back from your form, he shakes his head, saying ”ah, no, no, no, nothing like that” as the implications of the situation dawn on him. The atmosphere of the room shifts in an instant like background music cutting out durin a movie scene, and the man begins profusely apologizing for the misunderstanding while assuring you that ”he’s not going to hurt you, nothing here will hurt you”. 

It takes him a few seconds to make do with the new direction of the gloomy exchange, but after a moment of recollecting himself and taking in the sight of your teary mix of a befuddled and horrified expression, he sighs and makes his way back to you. A frown finds its way onto his features as his eyes travel over your trembling form, and with his brows flattened, he asks you ”if you would like some water” or ”if there’s anything you would like to ask”. Clearly attempting to remedy the despondent turn the dialogue has taken, he emphasizes the latter issue, wondering out loud about how ”you probably have quite a lot of questions for him” despite you offering no response. 

After a while of attempting to get you to talk with poor results, he resorts to gently sighing once more, making his way to the couch, and picking up one of the threadbare blankets laid on its back. Carefully, he goes to wrap the fabric around your shoulders before then checking the bindings on your limbs and waist. Stepping away from you, he lets you know that ”he still has a few things to take care of, but if you need anything, he’s right there in the back” after which he excuses himself to the other room over. 

And so, you end up sitting on the chair for a few more hours with only the worn cover to warm you up as you listen to him pottering around out of your sight, preparing the last few things in the apartment before your life together can finally, officially begin. 

˗ˏˋ ★ 3. Life: What is it like to live with them? How do they treat the darling?

The first few weeks are abysmal — there is no way around the fact. After you’re permitted to get off the chair, he doesn’t really see the need to try to ease you into your new life by gradually giving you more freedom and allowing you to get used to his presence. On the contrary, it’s just everything in your face, all at once, without even a single second’s time to breathe in between. 

You’re a feisty little thing, aren’t you? In the beginning, he has a really hard time trying to get through to you in a way that doesn’t earn him curses and sobs as a response. Yes, he understands, you must be overwhelmed, disoriented, scared, but look, he’s just trying to help you here. It’s a hassle trying to get you to eat and drink, and even if those weren’t a problem, the blatant fear with which you look at him is difficult for him to bear. No matter how tough you act or how many swearwords you launch at him, it’s quite easy to see that you’re a single further stressor away from a full-fledged breakdown. Aside from the frightened hostility, all he gets out of you are desolate mumblings about how you “want to return to your old life and job like normal” and tearful demands for him to take you back to your own place. And, to top it all off, the first instinct he has when being met with the sight of your trembling, choked up form is to gather you in his arms and hug all the distress away, but, needless to say, he can absolutely not resort to that. That said, what he does is give you time and space to the best of his ability while attempting to build the communication between the two of you little by little, and only then does he start trying to tackle the more practical challenges. 

His living situation is quite a headache in general, to start with. He essentially resides in his headquarters, and the place is dark, dusty and messy, up to the point where you have to wonder how anyone could live in the hole. There are papers everywhere, he has yet to clean the few empty takeaway boxes off of his document-riddled desk, and it’s quite apparent that, for one reason or another, he isn’t a particular fan of light. He gives you a brief house tour, showing you the open all-too-clearly-used-to-be-an-office living room, the lacklustre bathroom, the fridge in the kitchen, the fridge in the makeshift bedroom. It’s as if you had been thrown into the average teenager’s unmonitored apartment, only the owner in question is not a kid but an entire grown-ass man. 

And, on top of the aforementioned things, there is quite a lot of stuff in the house that doesn't function, properly or at all: The desk lamp is burnt out, the PC looks like it’s on its last breath, and most importantly, it is freezing in the apartment. It’s like the cold is seeping into your very bones, causing the tips of your fingers to lose colour and your lips to gain a blueish hue. It’s the sort of frigidness that makes you want to curl up in a corner with a blanket and not move for hours, yet he himself doesn’t appear the least bit bothered by the temperature. 

Moreover, he doesn’t seem to care that much about a handful of pressing things that you very much mind. While you’re having a hard time letting go of the mindset of ”some strange man just kidnapped me”, he seems to have moved on from the issue in a blink. He talks to you like he was chatting with an old friend, completely glossing over your bewildered expression and the fresh tear streaks framing your face. He offers you food whenever he’s having some, he asks if you’re bored, he yaps about whatever mundane matter it is that happens to be on his mind — he literally doesn’t give you the time to be anxious about the sudden change. 

And, to throw one more spanner in the works, he doesn’t really have a schedule he follows: Not a weekly one, and even less a daily one. All he has is a vague plan for each day, and whether or not he ends up sticking to it is a different matter entirely. Everything from evenly spaced meals to sleeping and regular working hours are but a wistful wish, and the concept of circadian rhythm seems to have been thrown out of the window a good while ago. Your sleep schedule, namely, is turned upside down in a matter of a few days: Whenever he doesn’t have anything important to do, he sleeps away the noon and works the nights. Having you be awake during the opposite hours would be counterproductive, so he ends up indirectly forcing you into his patterns. Consequently, you’re basically a walking corpse for the first week or so, hardly being able to focus on anything or keep a conversation going for longer than a few minutes at a time, but after a while, your brain catches up with the change. 

The act of sleeping itself also presents as an issue at the start. You’re quite stunned to find that the man doesn’t actually own a bed at all, and the fact that he slumbers in a fridge raises more questions than it provides answers. However, it’s only when you realize that he’s going to make you sleep in the thing as well that the misery of the situation reaches its peak. 

On the first night you spend with him, conveniently enough, you’ve already remained awake for nearly an entire 24 hours when the clock strikes 4 AM and he finally settles to roost. Such being the case, you’re not in any state to refuse him when he states that the fridge is where the two of you shall be sleeping. You don’t really even understand what he’s saying, either — much less when you consider the fever dream-esque contents of his sentences — but without further explanation, you find yourself being pulled towards the white coffin. 

Naturally, you start having highly warranted suspicions as soon as he opens the thing’s lid, and a gust of freezing cold air hits your face. He isn’t too concerned about your reluctance, however: Of course, he knows that it probably doesn’t appear ideal to you, but listen, he thought ahead and got you a down duvet! It was quite costly too, so he thinks you’ll be nice and warm for the entire night. So, after wrapping you in the comforter like a human-sized burrito, he snatches you into his arms, settles into the fridge, pulls the cover shut, and blacks out. 

Alas, needless to say, it’s not even two full hours later that he stirs to the sound of your distraught, disconsolate sobs against his chest. At first, he thinks that it must just be the anxiety about the change and all, but as he pushes the fridge door open and he’s able to get a better look at your face, he realizes that perhaps he should let this one slide. 

It has been a while since he has last seen a human being in such a wretched state. You’re trembling all over, a stream of snot is running down your upper lip, your face is practically colourless, and most importantly, you’re crying the sort of tears only prompted by actual, acute distress. He can hardly make any sense of your blubbering — the only words he successfully discerns out are ”cold” and ”tired” — yet the message is so abundantly clear that he basically jumps out of the casket and pulls your shivering form back into the warmth. 

Your weeping only mellows out after he has spent a good while holding you by your shoulders and assuring you that ”it’s his fault, you don’t need to do that ever again, he’s so sorry”. Then, following the harrowing quarter of an hour or so that he swears nearly blows his heart up, he sits you down beside his desk before going to dig through any and all closets in the apartment that could possibly contain anything soft for you to rest on. Eventually, all he ends up finding is a flimsy, worn bedroll that he promptly lays out next to the fridge before picking you up from the floor and plopping you down on the makeshift bed. Stripping himself of his overcoat, he bunches the piece of clothing up and slips it beneath your head, after which he proceeds to carefully tuck the comforter over your shoulders, all the way up to the lower half of your face, making sure that every single inch of your body is covered. 

The sleep deprivation catches up to you in an instant, and in but a few minutes, your breathing has evened out. He’s left to take in the sight of your serene features as you’re finally allowed some shut-eye: Slowly but surely, the warmth returns to your face, the wet streaks on your cheeks dry up, and within moments, you appear to have sunk into deep rest — a far cry from what your visage looked like just a while ago. Moreover, when he caresses your temple with the back of his fingers, your brows merely scrunch up the tiniest bit. Finally, he dares to exhale with the full capacity of his lungs. 

Luckily for you, the fridge is a one-and-done thing, and he gets you a proper mattress the very next day. From that point onward, you sleeping beside the fridge becomes the norm: Though he can’t say he isn’t occasionally tempted to grab you into the chest with him, he makes do with having the wall in between you as he would much rather have you cozy and rested than to subject you to his whims ever again. 

Then, when it comes to whatever happens during your waking hours, one thing is for certain: You really need to get creative with how you entertain yourself. Sure, you have what little you might have happened to carry with you when he snatched you away, but any and all electronics are obviously confiscated, so the digital form of passing time is a no-go. The man is, nicely put, broke as hell, and in consequence, your standard of living goes down as well, hobbies and otherwise. If there’s something relatively small that you would like to have as a means of passing your time — say, a book — he can squeeze a portion out of his limited budget to get you what you want. But, if it’s anything even a little more on the costlier side, there’s nothing he can do. It pains him as well, to the point where he seriously considers committing tax evasion, but for what it’s worth, he attempts to make you happy with what he has. 

The financial aspect affects certain other things, too. While he doesn’t try to hide the fact that he barely has any money to his name, he puts effort into making it show as little as possible. For instance, the meals he cooks you may sometimes be intriguing in substance, but he makes sure that you’re always fed, and you don’t ever have to fear for your basic needs not being met if you’re not overly picky. 

Moreover, due to him needing to make money to fund your basic living expenses, you quickly learn to enjoy your own company, way more than you already perhaps did. While he wants to spend as much time with you as he’s able to, he unfortunately has to take care of his work matters too, meaning that sometimes, the only option is to lock you in the room with the fridge and leave you there, alone, for the few hours it takes for him to be done with the gig. He’s always beyond apologetic, and he makes sure to leave you a little food so you won’t go hungry when he’s gone, but the isolation is enough to get you a little anxious every now and then. 

Or, if it’s a longer time he has to leave for, he might pull a tactical one on you and have you sleep through the entire ordeal. If he knows he’s going to have to be out for the whole night, he’s going to start setting the conditions for it the day before: Essentially, he forces you to get so tired that you won’t have the energy to think about escaping him. He himself can, if need be, go for unholy lengths of time without getting any sleep, but the case isn’t the same for the less Abundance-riddled kind, of course. So, to instil a little, tasteful sleep deprivation in you, he stays up the entire night at the computer by your mattress, pretending to try to be quiet but making sure to bounce his leg, clear his throat, shift positions, tap his pen against the desk and so on, consequently having you get quite possibly the worst sleep of your life. Alternatively, he might take the opportunity to tactically host his insomnia hotline until sunrise while ironically causing the mentioned ailment on you. His listeners are already so used to his oddities that a female voice screeching “shut the fuck up” in the background of the audio barely raises any concerns. 

Nevertheless, by the time he actually has to leave for work the next night, you’re hardly conscious and practically collapse the second he finally lets you go to bed. As usual, he tucks you in and gives you a peck on the forehead before leaving for his business, and when he comes back, he’s greeted with the heart-warming sight of you still in deep slumber. 

Or, another scenario that might take place is if something unexpected comes up and he hasn’t been able to tire you out, he might actually take you with him on the mission. Frankly speaking, the occurrence is much more common than he would like to admit since he isn’t exactly known for planning ahead, but one or a couple of times a week, you’ll be accompanying him. 

It’s a 50/50 chance whether you have the best time of your life or end up regretting ever being born. On the best occasions, it’s just you getting some fresh air and walking hand in hand with him while he tries to make sense of whatever ”clues” he thinks he has found. In general, it’s what the majority of your time outside his apartment consists of, but sometimes, the job ends up being about running away from horrors beyond your comprehension, having to be crammed into a locker with your face squished against his chest for an hour, or sitting entirely still and silent while waiting for him to finish decoding his own handwriting in the case file. It’s not like he means to make it an abhorrent experience for you or put you in danger, but it’s just that he can’t leave you alone in the office for so long, so it’s an all-around tricky situation. Also, as mentioned, it’s the only time you get to see the outside world, so you’re always more or less excited to tag along. Though, you’re pretty certain that he sometimes brings you out on the gigs just so he gets to flaunt his intuition to you every once in a while — with very mixed results. 

˗ˏˋ ★ 4. Rules: What kind of rules do they enforce? How lenient are they? How do they keep their darling in check?

If he were completely frank, he would admit that the first thing that comes to his mind is not setting rules for you at all. The concept sounds awfully bureaucratic to him, especially since you’re already in a situation you don’t want to be in. Besides, with the limited resources available to you, he really doesn’t think you would be able to pull off anything much worse than what he saw back in the day when he trained his juniors. 

Needless to say, as he ponders the matter even a tiny bit further, he realizes that it would perhaps be for the best for you to have at least some sort of restrictions after all. Judging from the rather intense looks you’re constantly sending towards the front door, you’re probably already waiting for the right moment to make your move, whether that be towards the exit or towards him, and so, he ends up putting together a few rules for you. 

No escaping him, of course, is the first thing he tells you. ”And you best believe that this old wolf would be on your tail in an instant, haha”, he adds, entirely ignoring the way your face contorts in something akin to second-hand embarrassment. You’re not sure if he’s trying to crack a morbid joke or if he genuinely finds amusement in the situation, but nevertheless, you can’t help but take note of the subtle warning. 

Hindering his work is also off the table, naturally. He takes the profession very seriously, and it would be a bother if you were to mess with whatever documents or pieces of evidence he has managed to gather. It’s how he brings food to the table, you know? You would be shooting your own leg if you were to try and ruin something like that, and besides, if you don’t have enough things to entertain yourself with — if you’re that bored — you can just come talk to him instead of making his, and indirectly your own, life difficult. 

And, lastly, though he phrases it as being more of a preference than an actual rule he’s going to impose, he would, if possible, rather not have you curse him into the deepest pits of hell whenever you talk to him. Still, it’s more of a could-you-please-not kind of a matter: He does understand where you’re coming from — getting to verbally express one’s disapproval is certainly something that can help release pent-up emotions — but it also makes him feel a little bad. However, if you really can’t help yourself, it’s not something he’ll punish you for. 

Then, when it comes to the general strictness with the limits, though his idea of the rules is quite similar to the majority of the other yanderes, you can actually push his boundaries quite a lot. A lot of things are negotiable with him if you know which arguments to utilize: At first, you might get a negative response to whatever it is you’re asking him for, but with enough probing and a few chic steps along the gray area, you may just be able to gain yourself some leeway. It’s only up to a certain point, though, and if you prod around too much, he might get more stringent with you. 

On the topic of what he uses to ensure you don’t go crossing him, he trusts that you have enough common sense in you to know that he would catch you in a heartbeat if you were to try and slip away from him. Whether that much is true or not (and if it’s his current profession that you should be worried about) is something you have to find out for yourself, but the looming threat of it is enough to keep you thinking twice nonetheless. 

Moreover, it’s not just the fear of him catching you if you were to try and slip away but also the dread of what could happen in between you getting found and him dragging you back into the apartment. You’re not entirely sure what’s going on with the strange artefact lodged into his wrist, nor do understand the source of the lingering, dark aura that seems to plague his presence every so often, but whatever the case might be, something tells you that perhaps, it would be for the best not to see for yourself. The feeling you get almost reminds you of the one you used to suffer with before knowing him — the mere thought has your heartbeat picking up. 

˗ˏˋ ★ 5. Consequences: What kind of punishments will the darling face? How do they punish different offences?

More than anything, Ashveil is kind of lost when it comes to punishing you. On one hand, he sides with the argument that actions should have consequences, and that purposeful misdeeds should be punished, but then again, it’s you. You don’t deserve that, he thinks, up until the very last point where he could reason the motivation behind your deeds to be anything other than malice. Although his thoughts sound suspiciously close to straight-up delusions in that sense, it’s not that they truly are, necessarily. He just wants to give you the benefit of the doubt, in his own words, but it’s frankly just due to the fact that he has a hard time raising his hand against you. No matter what he does, he feels bad afterwards. 

Despite your earlier doubts, you quickly find that there’s actually quite a lot of harm you can cause to both him and your environment as a result of him not aggressively monitoring every move you make. The limit is your own creativity: You can wreck his research, you can steal stuff from the kitchen cabinets for later, you can unplug his fridge in the middle of the night — you just need to get a little audacious, especially with the last example. 

However, as long as it isn’t you attempting anything actively violent towards him, he considers the deed a minor crime. His go-to method with such things is locking you in the office’s cleaning closet, plain and simple. He doesn’t want to hurt you, he doesn’t have the heart to take any privileges away from you for a longer time (and to be fair, you don’t even have that many of those that could be taken away in the first place), so the only approach he has left is putting you in cooldown. 

The closet is naturally cramped, and there’s only barely enough space for you to be able to sit with your knees pulled to your chest, but no matter how you torture your vocal cords or bang on the door, he won’t let you out until around the half-hour mark. It’s not what he initially had in mind: Whenever he grabs you by the arm and forces you into the thing, he threatens to leave you in it for the entire day, but the most time he has survived without caving in and changing his mind has been slightly less than a full 60 minutes. The truth of the matter is that he just can’t bear the heart-wrenching, panicked weeping, and when he eventually lets you out, he’s catching you straight into his embrace. 

In terms of anything a little harsher, there’s bound to be a singular re-trial of the fridge episode, only this time with punishing intent. It’s when he’s already having a particularly rough day, and you decide to use every method available to further worsen it. What you do doesn’t necessarily even need to be anything revolutionary — just a well-aimed smack at his face could be enough — but without much else aside from pure irritation on his mind, he promptly picks you up, throws you over his shoulder, and tosses you in the fridge for a timeout. However, much like in the closet’s case, his conscience starts stinging before long — in less than a minute, to be precise. You need but to let out a single distressed noise, and he’s already opening the cover and pulling you out. On such occasions, it’s ultimately him that ends up apologizing; he’s physically and mentally unable to be cruel towards you for long. 

If you were to be able to injure him, you would probably earn yourself the worst extent of his punishments, but alas, it’s not something you could ever actually manage to do. His reflexes are as sharp as the tip of his cane, and even if you were to seldom succeed at landing a blow at him, the damage done would be minimal in the long run. That being the case, the most livid you’re realistically ever going to see him is when you attempt to step out of the bubble that is his dark, dust-laden apartment. 

You’ve been staring at the door for at least ten minutes now, hardly blinking. Having long since grown to recognize the smallest details of the room he has had you spend so much time in, all the way from every single sticker that adorns the side of his fridge to the exact spot of that one scratch on the ceiling, any changes in your surroundings stand out like a canvas peacock in a flock of ploos. And, this once, you’re certain: The lock on the door isn’t turned all the way shut. 

It’s past 3 AM at night — around the hour he usually ends up going to bed — only this time, he isn’t home. He made you snug in bed like he always does whenever he has to leave for his business at the devil’s hour, and the fatigue is pressing upon you from last night’s lamentable amount of sleep, yet at the same time, you’ve never felt as awake as you do now. From where you’re lying on the mattress, you can see that in the tiny gap between the door and its frame, where you would normally find the tiny peek of the locked latch, there is now nothing visible.

Despite not having yet moved a single inch from where you’re wrapped in your comforter, your heart is already thumping against your ears. Though your body is begging for you to simply stay still, to fall asleep like you normally do and rest until your abductor returns from his job, the consoling warmth that has gathered underneath the comforter now feels tense, galvanizing. 

It has only been half an hour since he left, and you haven’t heard a single sounds from outside, not from him nor from his peculiar assistant who he warned was keeping an eye on you. All that sounds in the frowzy room is the steady humming of the refrigerator. 

Slowly, as if fearing that you could disturb the lingering silence in the apartment, you slide the blanket off of yourself and prop yourself up on your elbows. Then, as quietly as you’re able to, you plant your heels on the bedroll and get on your feet. 

You press your ear against the door. At first, you hear nothing but your own blood rushing through your head, then the echoing murmur one begins to perceive when their environment gets too quiet, but finally, as you manage to stabilize your breathing and enhance your focus, you determine that not a single noise can be heard from behind the wall. 

You set your hand on the door handle. Then, with an inhale so deep that it reaches the very bottom of your lungs, you twist the grip. 

The door slides open with a creak that sounds nearly deafening in the all-consuming silence. The sudden disruption makes you wince, urging you to forget the whole thing and retreat immediately, yet despite the jittery dread, you resist the reflex. With shivers tingling down your back, you slip into the apartment’s open living room. 

The almost inaudible, distant thump of heavy bass travels into your ears from somewhere far away. The night in the Dovebrook District is unusually quiet, only adding to your rapidly burgeoning unease. 

Your mouth is dry. Swiping your tongue over your lips in an apprehensive manner, you try to make sense of your surroundings in the darkness. Despite having spent a good lot of hours in the space, the shapes of the furniture now seem to reach different edges and corners. You let your eyes travel over the dim silhouette of the slightly misaligned couch, the pile of empty cardboard boxes by the wall, the faintly colourful beam of light cast on the floor from between the shut blinds on the window. The back of your neck blooms with goosebumps, the tips of your fingers are icy cold, and the trepidation weighing on your mind is blurring the line between your rational and emotional thinking. 

You haven’t yet even done anything “wrong”. It’s his mistake; leaving the door unlocked and indirectly allowing you to step out into the rest of the place. You haven’t broken anything, you haven’t stolen anything from the kitchen, you haven’t tried to escape. You could still hope to explain yourself by saying that you were just a little hungry, that you couldn’t sleep, that you just wanted something to do, and he would, without a doubt, buy the explanation, whether that be his gullibility or leading you to believe so. However, no matter how you try to keep your eyes in check, the one place your gaze keeps drifting towards is the front door. 

The sense of haste catches up with you in a mere few seconds. Within the same moment, you make the decision to seize opportunity.

You rush towards the exit, nearly tripping over the carpet edge as your legs scramble to keep up with your nerves. It’s like the entire world flips upside down, both conceptually and what feels like physically. Like running towards the light at the end of the tunnel, you scamper across the room and throw yourself at the egress, yanking the safety chain out of its socket and pressing down on the handle.

In your frenzy-hazed state, it takes a few tries of yanking on the lever for you to realize that out of the two doors standing between you and your freedom, he hasn’t forgotten to lock the more important one. Still, you wrench the thing multiple times more, acting as if the mechanism would give in if you made enough attempts to push it down. In the span of a single minute, you’ve ditched the ability for complex thought: Much like in a dream, time seems to have slowed down, and your hurried movements are being guided by the primitive, adrenaline-fuelled vigour to just get out, get out, get out. 

Still, you sink your nails into the level-headed, coherent part of your psyche and hang onto it, pushing down the fear bubbling in your stomach and forcing yourself to slow down and think. Swallowing once, twice, you count sluggish seconds in your head, recalling the important pieces of information you’ve been holding onto for moments such as the present. 

You know where the key is — he told you, albeit unbeknownst to himself: The risk you took inquiring him about the spare one’s location while he was asleep was a substantial one, yet the time for its pay-off seems to finally have arrived.

You turn around on your heels, let your hand fall off the handle, and direct your gaze towards the kitchen. Your eyes flick over the counter, the fridge, the cupboards, before settling on the obscured shape of the stepstool tucked beneath the sink. 

Not wasting a second more, you rush past the couch and the counter, going straight for the last piece to your puzzle. You grasp the stool with both hands, drag it out from underneath the drain pipes, and dart back to the door with the piece of furniture in your arms. You hardly pay note to the loud screech the plastic makes when you draw it across the floor, instead focusing on hastily setting the thing’s legs against the jambs of the doorframe and promptly stepping onto the pedestal. 

You reach as high as you possibly can, outstretching your hand over the door’s narrow lintel, and start groping around. The dust, layers atop of layers, sticks to the pads of your fingers as you pray for them to make contact with something other than the grime. For a few hair-raising moments, your heart travels further and further up your throat as the thought of having been given false information creeps into your brain, until finally, the side of your nail knocks against something. A small, metal tag along with its banana-shaped charm drops on the floor beside you with a clink. 

Your legs feel strangely weak when you step off the stool and reach down at your feet to pick the keyfob up. It’s a peculiar sensation to have your body become so utterly electrified from head to toe: You’re acutely aware of how the tag feels against the palm of your hand — its round edges, the cold material, each tiny ring of the chain that connects it to the trinket, all of it. Your entire arm trembles as you clutch the lifeline in your fist like you were afraid that it could disappear into thin air at any moment. 

Then, you turn your attention to the door itself. Silently, you stare the lock down until your eyes begin morphing its shape, making the small, round sensor appear as if it were breathing. 

You feel sick to your stomach. For a hot minute, you wonder if you should wait, if you just waited a little bit more, just to make sure he’s gone, that he’s far enough not to catch you. However, though the timid part of your rationale attempts to hold you back, to make you reconsider, to have you stand in silence for just a little while more, the rest of you, down to the tips of your fingers, has already made its choice. 

Setting your free hand on the door handle, you bring the metal key tag a few inches away from the censor on the lock; just far enough for it not to trigger the mechanism. 

Breathing in, out, in, out, you prepare yourself for the feat. You swallow down the spit in your mouth, you curl your toes, roll your shoulders back, and will the buzzing in your ears to subside. Then, with every last bit of your consciousness directed at the sight ahead, you give yourself a countdown. 5, 4, 3... 2... 1...

As the mechanism whirs and the handle’s resistance disappears, your thoughts scatter. You throw the door wide open, so much so that it nearly swings to hit the wall beside it, yet you hardly pay any mind to the noise you make. Instead, with newfound strength burning in your limbs, you bolt out of the apartment and to the flight of stairs leading down to the street. 

The coarse concrete rasps audibly against the soles of your shoes as you rush down the steps, skipping over one or two at a time, barely managing to keep your balance. Scurrying past the first landing, you make a sharp turn, veering towards the pile of cardboard boxes that block the way to the lower floor. Whereas with him, you’ve usually spent a while carefully making your way through the mound and then wasting another minute or two compiling it back up, you now surge through the obstacle, spreading the boxes across the lower platform and sending a couple of oblivious emoti flying down the stairs like footballs. You stumble past the rubbish, wasting no thought on the strident noise of carton tearing, and make it through to the second floor. 

In your haste-blinded frame of mind, you barely make note of the crack of light that is cast on the landing by the ajar door of the neighbouring apartment. A small shadow, around the height of your knees, flashes in and out of sight in the narrow gap that is visible of the house’s interior as you dash past it. It would be nearly impossible to make sense of any noise over the thunderous thumping in your head, but even then, though you’re not certain whether it could merely be the yield of your overstrung imagination, you think you hear a pair of rapid footsteps carrying from behind the door. 

Tears strain in your throat as you force your legs to work a little harder, for your feet to run just a tiny bit faster. You swerve towards the last stretch, the last, long flight of stairs that would land you on the pavement, violent shivers raking every last inch of your body, each painful inhale slashing through your windpipe, the sense of gelid dread pursuing you a mere few millimetres behind. 

You’re only barely able to stifle the terrified shriek that almost bursts out of your lungs as the neighboring apartment’s door is flung wide open behind you. The deafening bang shakes the very structure of the building, yet it does nothing to cover the sound of heels clacking against concrete closing in on you, climbing down the steps in a much quicker rhythm than you would ever be capable of. 

It’s the sort of terror that you’ve imagined the characters in a horror movie feel. The sheer panic that’s coursing through your veins is indescribable in words, in anything but the sensation of your entire system being set on a singular objective. Your eyes, your ears, your everything locks in on the reality of which centre is the street in front of you, the finish line, the water’s surface. The actuality of its existence, its entire concept, is blurred into a yes or a no, and all you know is that you need to reach it, you need to run, you need to get to the end of the stairs, down the mere few steps that are left, only a few, less than 20, less than 15, 14, 13, 12-11-10-9-8-

Your breathing cuts off abruptly, and a strange, garbled sound slips out of your mouth. It takes you an entire second to understand what has happened, but by the time you realize that the back of your shirt has gotten caught on something, the world is already flipping. 

The wind is knocked out of your body as you land on your back on the stairs, and for a moment, you’re entirely unable to breathe. The first to absorb the impact are your elbows, then your lower spine, and right when you’re certain that your skull is going to strike the concrete, something comes in between to cushion the blow. 

Dull, endorphin-numbed pain shoots up your arms and back as the effects of the fall make themselves known. At first, you’re unable to comprehend anything, to even understand that you didn’t just split your head open on the stairs. The view of the street down ahead has turned into the lustreless, grey ceiling of the stairwell, yet as your gaze finally amps its focus up, in the middle of the hazy image, you see a pale, wide-eyed visage. 

The look on his face is unnaturally wild, quite like nothing you’ve ever seen on his features. His pupils are dilated, his mouth slightly ajar, and his shoulders heave with heavy, ragged breaths as he glares you down with the sort of barely constrained ferocity that has the hairs on the nape of your neck spiking up. 

You allow yourself a single, slow-moving fraction of a second more to try and inhale as best you can, yet all you can muster is a pathetic, pained wheeze. Your head swims as you attempt to lift it off what you now realize is the toe of his boot, but no matter how much strength you try to put behind the action, you’re unable to get yourself upright. 

However, in the midst of all the disorientation, both your and his attention is caught by movement at the bottom of the staircase. 

Your vision is slightly smudged, but you’re still able to make out the unmistakable shape of a furbo waddling towards the entrance of the building. The poor creature, clutching its camera in both of its fur-covered hands, stops in its tracks by the first step, tilting its disproportionately large head to the side in a curious manner. You watch as its ears perk up, as it struggles to comprehend just what it is looking at, yet right then, as if the Aeons THEMSELVES had intervened with your fate, the critter raises the camera to its eye. 

You crane your neck as much as you possibly could, making sure that no matter the angle of the lens, your face would be caught in the picture. Your eyes snap wide open, and you force yourself to look directly into the bright white flash right as the furbo’s tiny finger presses down on the shutter button.

A sharp snap resounds in the stairwell. Next, the little light that illuminated the stairwell goes pitch-black. 

A bright, searing flash of red cuts through the darkness. Then another. Shrill, otherworldly hisses pierce your ears, seemingly echoing in a space that no longer abides by the walls of the narrow shaft. 

There is a taste of blood in your mouth. 

Then, the gloom vanishes. The shadows withdraw to where they came from, that being from him, and you raise your gaze just in time to see the needle on his wrist consume the entity. 

The dim, dreary light returns to the stairwell. You stare up at the ceiling, taking in the sight of the long, shreddy scratches that now cover its previously untainted surface. 

Every last bit of your body aches and trembles with the aftershocks of the panic, yet with the final scraps of your strength, you plant your palms on the concrete and try to wrench yourself down and forward. The attempt is short-lived, however: Fast as a lightning, something cold and hard lands directly in the middle of your forehead, compelling you to lie right back down on the steps. 

He steps the heel of his boot on your shoulder, shifting just enough of his weight on you to border the line between uncomfortable and painful. A swift, high-pitched swish cuts the air as Ashveil promptly raises the metal handle of his cane off of your face, swivels it over in a single, keen movement, and brings the needle-sharp end down right above your wide open eye, a hair’s breadth from your cornea. 

At first, you can’t believe the words he speaks are coming out of his mouth. His tone of voice is so gruff, so uncharacteristically enraged that you hardly recognize it to belong to the man. ”Should I just end it right now, is that it?!” he snaps at you, shaking his cane to emphasize each word, feeding the sheer horror he’s putting you through. The rest of whatever he is saying fails to properly make it through to you — ”an eye for an eye”, uttered with anger of such calibre that it shakes your wretched being to its very core. Before you know it, the tears that have long since gathered at your waterlines spill past your lashes and down the sides of your face, and a meek, fractured sob breaks past your lips. 

Something in his expression shifts. As if having been shot with a tranquilizer, a tinge of sympathy appears on his anger-warped features. 

A tiny draft hits your face as he whisks his cane to the side from above your eye before stepping back and lifting his weight off of your shoulder. The short-lived relief is, however, quickly replaced by another fit of fright as his hand reaches down to grab your upper arm much more firmly than what you’re used to. The only warning you get is a low-pitched ”get up”, after which he yanks your body off of the stairs. 

You struggle to find your balance. Your legs tremble as he begins climbing back up the stairs while dragging you along without the least bit of care on if you’re able to stay on your feet or not. There’s no doubt of the fact that he’s aware of the very same thing, yet his whole demeanour is now entirely devoid of the kindness he usually conveys when handling you. With his grip as tight as a vice, he ignores your frantic, sobbing pleas for him to please slow down and continues to tug you back up the stairwell. 

He slams the office’s door shut behind him with so much strength that the entire place quakes on its foundation. Kicking the stool by the entrance to the side, he yanks you deeper inside the apartment with nothing but palpable infuriation in his manner. Then, finally, as you’re once more encased in the darkness of the living room, he turns towards you. 

Without a single bit of compassion in his voice, he presents you with the choice of ”either the fridge or the closet”. In your muddled state of mind, you fail to make sense of his words at first — it’s like you don’t understand what is being said to you — yet as you grasp the implication, your first instinct is to try and tear yourself free from his hold. It’s a futile effort, naturally: Like handling a lifeless object, he merely fixes his grip and pulls you closer to him, glaring you down with nothing but ice in his pale eyes before repeating his words. 

The second the first syllable of ”closet” leaves your mouth, he turns on his heels and drags you over to where the ever-harrowing cleaning cabinet door already hangs ajar. He yanks the handle so hard that the thing’s hinges squeak, after which, despite your best efforts and cries, you’re shoved into the claustrophobic space. You screech at him from the bottom of your lungs, you try to kick your legs in between the door before he pushes it shut, but the most you’re able to do is cause a few detergent bottles to drop on your head from the shelves above. The last thing you manage to scream at him is a piercing, distressed “please”, but the word fails to move him, and next, you’re encased in pitch-black with an ear-deafening slam. 

It ends up being quite a while before he allows you out. Whereas he would normally cave in after an hour at most, he’s able to weather the muffled sound of your wails for the entire rest of the night. Curses, insults, apologies, unintelligible cries, the bangs of you beating your fists raw against the inside of the closet door — none of it makes it through to his heart, even when your voice grows so hoarse from the exertion that its tone dies out. 

Moreover, he can’t afford to show any uneasiness on his features as he has to explain the earlier noise to whomever has shown up at the front door. It’s the strange lady from downstairs, you assume, complaining about how “he shouldn’t just go roughing up her ex-employees, no matter how annoying they can get”. You can just barely make out her voice from where you’re locked at the back of the apartment, but despite how loudly you yell, it’s quite apparent that she’s not coming to save you. Though you’re certain that she can hear at least a part of the noise you make, she has clearly long since decided that whatever is happening in the apartment one floor above hers is none of her business. Such seems to be the general attitude of the building’s residents: The options are to either snitch on each other or to keep their tongues to themselves, and they seem to have unanimously sided with the latter. 

In the end, nothing comes of the entire episode. Though he lamented the very thing in the beginning, the Dovebrook District’s notoriousness for criminal activity is what ends up saving his skin. Not a single person in the area cares enough to bat an eye at the noise that went down by the block that night. 

And, when you’re let out of the closet a few hours later, he takes your worn form into his arms and embraces you like he always does, yet lacking the usual sense of guilt in his expression. This time around, though you don’t take the chance to look up at his face, the only thing visible on his features is dull, lifeless relief. 

All in all, he can get as frightening as he is pathetic most of the time — you merely need to warrant enough anger from him.

˗ˏˋ ★ 6. Emotions I: How do they show love? How do they attempt to make the darling love them?

Initially, when it comes to expressing his affection towards you, Ashveil appears to have quite a hard time determining just where the line between too much and too little goes. You come to find early on that he’s a naturally touchy person, to the point where it doesn’t seem like he himself realizes the extent of it: If you don’t actively protect your personal space, you’re going to have his hand on your shoulder, his thigh against yours, and his fingers in your hair. 

Firstly, he has a bad habit of touching relatively sensitive spots on your body without really thinking about it aside from the doting aspect. Or, he does pay a little mind to if you might find his caresses particularly off-putting, but even that doesn’t appear to be much of a slowing factor for him. On the contrary, in his eyes, it’s good to get you used to his hands on you: He hopes that, with time, the closeness is going to feel familiar and perhaps even comforting to you, rather than inciting the apparent unease you feel whenever you feel him brushing, stroking and petting you. Nevertheless, the notion hardly takes away any bit of your discomfort when the icy cold metal of his prosthetic fingertips makes contact with the back of your neck, your bare side, the shell of your ear, the underside of your jaw. 

He takes every opportunity he gets to fondle you, really, often making less-than-plausible-sounding excuses to you just so he can poke you a bit. For instance, he’s a particular fan of the good old classic ”oh, you look a little bit cold” where he takes hold of you and rubs his hands up and down your arms to create friction heat. A massage is also something he uses as a pretext: You could be doing just about anything, and he might come up behind you, nab your shoulders, and start kneading the muscles while inquiring about what you’re busied with. Not only do his sudden bursts of affection keep you on edge in general, but both of the aforementioned activities have also ended up with the prong on his wrist catching on your clothing.

Occasionally, he doesn’t even bother making up a reason for the touches and instead just goes for the act. The only warning you get is a ”come here for a bit, won’t you?” before he’s already making his way towards you with grabby hands. He then proceeds to take a good look at you, briefly fix your hair and your clothes, give your head a few pats, and finish up with a playful pinch on your cheek, after which he takes a step back and allows you to continue whatever it is that you were doing before the interruption. He just can’t keep his hands off of you for long. 

And, of course, he likes to hug you. His own body itches for proper contact with you, and hence, getting unwillingly engulfed in his arms is basically an hourly occurrence. The hugs are never the short and sweet sort, either: No matter if he has caught you from the back or if your face is squished against his chest, he keeps you as you are for what could be minutes at a time, responding to your very possible protests with a mere ”just a little longer”. He wants to make it appear as if the gesture is lighthearted and carefree, but it’s quite apparent that the closeness is actively factory-resetting his cortisol levels. 

He has a bad case of cuteness aggression going on, too. Sometimes, you quite literally have to beg him to loosen his hold a little so that your bones don’t end up cracking under the strength of his squeeze. Moreover, each one of his embraces ends with him landing a peck on the crown of your head at the very least, but if he’s in even a little bit mushy of a mood, he isn’t letting you go before he has showered every last square inch of your exposed skin in ticklish smacks. To top it all off, he makes the entire thing especially awkward with the half-muffled, overly excited ”you look good enough to eat” he puffs against your skin. And, him referring to himself as an old wolf right after consequently comes off as the overstatement of the century — the way he nuzzles his face against yours is more resemblant of a tiny, restless puppy.

Then, due to his age, all things old-school are also his cup of tea. He guides you around with his palm on the small of your back or between your shoulder blades, he takes you by your hand and gives you a twirl or two, and he carries you around as if you weren’t able to step over puddles yourself. The last of the three, especially, is something he’s fond of doing: Whenever you’re accompanying him on one of his gigs, you can be certain that he’s going to hook his arm on the underside of your knees and hoist you up into the air to carry you over even the smallest obstructions. It doesn’t matter how tetchy you get or how much effort you put into trying to flail yourself free, he’s getting his way. The most you’re going to get out of him is a hearty laugh as he fixes his hold on you.

Still, despite the whole shebang of different ways he would like to bond with you in the bodily ways, he has certain reservations about them. If you appear to be particularly reluctant towards him having his touch on you in any manner, he dials it down. It doesn’t really matter if it’s you angrily swatting his hands away or if the aversion makes itself known by you trembling and hugging yourself whenever he gets too close; though the rejection stings, he has enough self-restraint to be able to take a step back, at least until he gets desperate enough to try again. 

He tries his best not to let the overwhelming urge to touch you override his empathetic instinct. Looking at the interaction from your point of view, the constant threat of him infringing your personal space, no matter how gentle his intentions are, must be somewhat unnerving. Nevertheless, he hopes that at some point, you’ll learn to associate his touches with what he intends for them to be. And, as said, after your body gets past the initial scare, it’s probably going to be easier for your mind to follow suit. 

Then, aside from the overwhelmingly prevalent physical aspect of his adoration, he surprises you with a gift or two every now and then. Of course, his budget doesn’t have much room for any lavish things, but with whatever little he can get together, he buys you small things such as trinkets or snacks he knows you might enjoy. It’s largely trial and error at the start as he’s, for one reason or another, very insistent on not asking things directly but trying to use his deductive skills to figure out what it is that you like. If you have any capacity to read between the lines, it’s quite obvious to see what he’s trying to do: His very unassumingly constructed questions don’t leave all that much open to interpretation, and usually, whatever he was thinking of getting you arrives during the same day, anyway. 

Furthermore, the items themselves that he gifts you aren’t usually anything that strange, as mentioned before, but occasionally, he presents you with things so obscure that you simply have to start wondering whether or not his means of acquiring them were legitimate at all. Averting your eyes from the object he’s offering you, you might inquire him about the origin of the piece, and if your suspicions have hit the mark, the all too guilty of an expression on his face serves as enough of an answer for the question. 

Apart from the bribery, he also allows you to have a say in a few more mundane things about your life. For example, he often asks you what you would like to have for dinner (especially if he has once again given in to the temptation of ordering take-out), or which scent shampoo you would rather use. Or, when he inevitably has to buy a few duvet covers for your ”bed”, he consults you about what sort of a print you would like on them. It’s the little things that he tries to make you happy with, regardless of the results he ends up achieving with them. 

On the verbal side of things, he likes to compliment you quite a lot. At first, the things he says might appear unnerving and beyond superficial to you since it’s a half-unknown man spewing them at you, but after a while, you get used to hearing certain utterances from him. ”Well aren’t you just the loveliest thing ever”, ”oh, beautiful, gorgeous”, and ”I could just eat you right up” are all things he says to you with varying levels of audible infatuation in his words, accentuating the praise with a tasteful touch or two. More often than not, the way he goes about the compliments manages to fluster you for better and for worse, ultimately only adding fuel to the fire.

And, naturally, he wants to spend as much time with you as possible. Though he has gotten used to spending long periods of time alone, now that he has you, it’s like he can’t bear to be without company for longer than an hour or two at most. Still, to say he’s socially hyperactive would be an incorrect description — it’s more that he just wants to soak in your presence, to bathe in the happiness that your mere existence offers him. You don’t think you’ve ever caught him in a truly bad mood around you if it’s not yourself that has warranted it. 

However, it’s not like he just wants to sit still and grope you as a means of bonding with you. To pass the time, he suggests a myriad of activities for the two of you to do. If there’s something you’re particularly interested in — a relatively low-effort hobby, for example — you can be certain that he’s going to try and research all there is to be learned of it. Or, if nothing is proposed from your end, his personal go-to is board games: The murder mystery sort is his favourite, and albeit you’re pretty damn certain that his deduction process has zero base to it, he almost always ends up winning nonetheless. It’s like the guy just pulls the right answers out of his butt.

Lastly, he enjoys simply talking with you. He has always been a bit of a chatterbox when he gets into a more relaxed mood, meaning that whenever there’s a quiet moment, he usually ends up trying to fill it with idle conversation. More than anything, he encourages you to talk to him; to ask, to ponder, to inquire about anything that might be on your mind. Though he might get a little cryptic with his answers if he deems the topic to be something that you perhaps shouldn’t know too much about, he’s largely open to any and all questions you may have. His prosthetic arm and the cane he carries around are things he knows you’re especially curious about, so he makes sure to present them to you, albeit staying a bit vague on their backstory. And, if you show any interest in it, he gladly lets you have a closer look at the metal on his hand or twiddle with the ornaments of his walking stick. Just don’t touch the nail, please.

˗ˏˋ ★ 7. Emotions II: How do they deal with the darling’s emotions? How are outbursts handled? How do they attempt to comfort the darling?

First off, one thing that he doesn’t actually show very overtly is that he’s, in fact, quite good with emotional conversations. It’s not that he tries to deliberately conceal that side of himself, but rather that he finds such exchanges to be a little depressing in nature. He has gone through his fair share of sorrow during his long life, and so, if possible, he tries to keep both you and himself in lighter spirits for the most part. 

Still, he’s well aware that such a goal isn’t realistic in the current circumstances. He understands that the emotional toll of what he’s putting you through is high, and it would be cruel of him not to offer to help you untangle the unfavourable feelings. 

Therefore, just to try to make out your general mood, he makes sure to ask you how you’re doing every day. It doesn’t really matter to him whether or not you actually answer the question as that in itself already gives him some info on the matter; even if it’s complete silence that he’s met with, he sticks to the habit. Rage, resentment, tears, melancholy, panic, silence, glaring — he’s ready to face all of it with a brave face and open arms. 

Though, directing anger at him is a little precarious in regard to what will follow. When he’s somewhat well-rested and has patience to deal with just about whatever life throws at him, he handles you with forbearance and grace, but during the times he hasn’t eaten the entire day and hasn’t slept in two, his methods of dealing with your wrath might lack poise, so to speak. As in, he lowers himself to the same level as you and quite possibly starts yelling. Or, rather, not yelling but bickering in a moderately loud voice that only manages to egg you on further. It’s especially if the matter you’re pissed about is something relatively trivial that he thinks could be solved with calm, constructive conversation. If you needed something, you could have just come to him kindly and skipped the shouting! Nothing productive ever comes out of such an approach, so if he’s feeling cranky, keeping the meaner words to yourself is usually the better route for all parties involved. 

Moreover, if you stoop a lever lower and start insulting him for the simple sake of it, the adult male will actually sulk. Though he considers himself a relatively laid-back person, if your affronts get personal, he might get genuinely offended. His questionable deductive skills, his living habits and, Aha forbid, his drip are all things he puts (various levels of) effort into, and if those are things you wish to target while mad, be prepared to deal with a good while of huffiness from him. 

But, if he’s in a suitable state of mind, he might attempt to placate you rather than mirroring your emotion. Typically, he just walks up to you, sets his palm on the crown of your head while you’re mid-sentence, sighs, and tells you that ”whatever it is, he’s going to try his best to fix it”. Screaming one’s head off isn’t usually something one wants to do for very long when they’re getting zero energy in return, so unfortunately, his calm approach usually makes you abandon the mission early. 

Then, though he really wishes he wasn’t, he’s used to the sight of your tears as well. You don’t even have to be a particularly tear-prone person overall, but the circumstances which he makes you live in cause you to constantly linger closer to the verge of crying than you would like. They say it’s simply human nature for the trigger to be more sensitive when tired, and it’s a theory you quite often end up proving true. 

He’s prepared to deal with that side of you as well, of course: More often than not, you just need a little time to yourself, a long hug, some reassurance, maybe a cup of tea, a nap, and you’ll be back to your normal self in no time. However, if it looks like he won’t be able to solve your emotional state with a few simple tricks up his sleeve, he gets out of the problem-solving state and instead focuses on gently guiding you through the sorrow you’re experiencing. 

There isn’t a proper, repeating pattern to how your breakdowns occur, much due to the fact that almost nothing in his life is scheduled in general. Sometimes you take a moment to shed a few tears when he’s out — you have plenty of time to get the stress out of your system without risking him intervening, that way — but every now and then, you don’t bother to wait to be alone. It’s not like you really have that much control over when the brimful bottle of tears decides to finally spill over, anyway. 

At first, he thinks it’s just the tiredness again. You know, it’s just the body’s normal response to being under a lot of pressure, and you’ve been a bit on edge lately, haven’t you? It’s nothing to be ashamed of, in his eyes. So, crouching down in front of where you’re huddling on the mattress, trembling like a leaf with the comforter wrapped around yourself, he attempts to gauge whether or not he can solve the situation with his lighter methods. 

He takes in the sight of your tear-stained face and your quivering form, sighing gently, taking care not to appear the slightest bit irritated. ”Crying again, are we?” he asks you in a soft, hushed voice as he places his gloved hand over your blanket-clad shoulder. Trying to find your eyes, he tilts his head to the side to align himself with your downward gaze. 

You appear genuinely distraught, is the result he bases on the quick visual assessment he makes of your state. The half-hearted attempt at a tender, reassuring smile falls off of his face as he listens to your faint, choppy breaths and watches as you stare into the void with unblinking, wide eyes, and it’s when he decides to drop the lighter approach and instead begins properly consoling you. 

You flinch violently as the hand on your shoulder slides past the comforter’s edge and behind the nape of your neck. He nearly finds himself mirroring the jittery movement as you make a weak attempt at pulling away from the gesture you seem to perceive as intrusive, but he decides to push the boundary nonetheless. 

Settling himself to sit on the bedroll in an awkward manoeuvre with his thighs spread out, he proceeds to snake his arm around your upper body and urge you to fall against him. Once more, you try to push him away, but after a moment, you cease to fight the gesture, giving in to his wish to properly embrace you. Softening his voice still, he starts trying to make sense of the situation. ”Did something happen?” he asks in a tone so gentle that you nearly fall right into the comfort offered to you. It’s something that only deepens the despair clutching at your chest, and the only response he gets from you is another, body-jerking sob. Despite his apparent concern, he remains solid against you, offering you the consolation of being held up by another. ”This is a little overdue, huh?” he sighs. 

As is typical for him, he asks you if you would like to talk it out despite already knowing the answer. It’s more of a formality: He wants you to know that he’s there to listen if you change your mind and end up wanting to vent the woe to him after all, but in the state you’re in, he suspects that the best course of action is to just hold you for as long as the misery persists.

So, instead, he attempts to distract you. The sensory realm, he finds, is an effective way to redirect one’s thoughts, and although the experiences he has with such are mostly on the side of pain, he has a special knack for pleasant touch. Carefully, he slides his hand past the back of your neck and beneath the comforter you’ve tightly wrapped around yourself. With silent reassurance behind his strokes, he begins trailing the pads of his fingers over your upper back in slow, round motions. At first, the feeling has your spine arching and your shoulder blades protruding in an effort to escape the sensation, but as the only directions for you to move in are towards his hand or flusher against his chest, you end up allowing the invasion. Tracing a circular, unintelligible pattern, he applies just enough pressure for the feeling not to be ticklish, almost as if he was writing over your skin. Simultaneously, his free hand makes its way over to the crown of your head where he bunches the tips of his fingers up, sets them against your scalp, and spreads them out like a firework or a flower’s petals. Despite your initially distressed state, the feeling is so pleasant, so calming that you find yourself instinctively relaxing against him in no time. 

More often than not, the episode tires you out enough for you to end up taking a doze right after, or if you’re already approaching your usual bedtime, you might sleep overnight. If the case is the latter, though he knows his arm won’t be thanking him when the morning arrives, he might decide to sleep beside you on the bedroll rather than in the fridge. He knows he’s fretting for nothing — that you’re all okay now that you’ve gotten it out of your system and are already in slumber — but he can’t help the worry. He’s well aware that you might not end up appreciating the gesture when you wake up, but nevertheless, he settles behind you on the mattress, carefully reaches his arm around you, and pulls your back against his chest. 

He has a really hard time seeing you in any sort of emotional stress, both since he feels a little helpless in the face of it and because he knows that he alone is the cause of it, no matter what the surface-level reason for the tears is. In that sense, he battles with guilt over your emotional state, yet in the end, despite not having very much faith in himself regarding comforting you, he’s quite skilled at it. 

˗ˏˋ ★ 8. Things to exploit: What are the darling’s best chances at escaping? Are there things which the darling can use to their advantage? How can the darling make things easier for themselves?

As mentioned, the biggest problem with escaping him is that it more or less is and was his profession to hunt people down. Whether the methods he uses in the job are legitimate or not is entirely up for you to decide, but nevertheless, his occupation remains the biggest obstacle for you to cross. A certain, popular saying could very well be applied to his case: The man may leave the Galaxy Rangers, but the Galaxy Rangers never leaves the man. 

That said, an elaborate plan has to be made if you wish to escape him. You need to think about the process in layers: Firstly the apartment itself, secondly the Dovebrook District, thirdly the city, and lastly the planet itself. It doesn’t matter where in Planarcadia you are, he’s going to get on your tail eventually, so if you truly wish to evade him for good, you’re going to have to leave the place entirely. The fortunate fact about the final part of the equation is that Ahatopia has quite a lot of traffic going in both directions, so slipping away on a spaceship isn’t actually that difficult of a task. The Astral Express, whenever the train happens to drop on the celestial body, is naturally also an option to consider, albeit it carries its own risks. 

To tackle the first level, as in actually making it out of the apartment, your best bet is waiting for when he’s out at work. If you’re prepared, fast and shameless enough, you could manage to find a way to break out of your prison, whether that be by picking the lock, finding a way to take the door off its hinges entirely, or waiting for him to slip up. The last of the three, however, is something that might take quite some time, especially if he has already blundered once. In this case, patience is quite literally the key. 

The issue that arises with whatever comes next is the fact that just about everything in Planarcadia is broadcasted in one way or another, and while that might end up being a valuable asset if you wish to take the case to the media and get his sorry ass, it also means that your captor could quite possibly follow you digitally. No matter where you go, the threat remains, and so, making your way to the nearest interastral transport might be the wisest choice. 

The second option for making it out of his clutches is, believe it or not, appealing to his softer side. Though it occasionally appears like his chest cavity is mostly filled with bananas and interastral horrors, he does have a heart — a heart you can reach ridiculously easily, to be precise. He’s one of the rare yanderes that might actually give in if you cry and plead enough. It doesn’t necessarily mean that he’s going to just let you free, but it may get him to become lenient to a degree that will allow you to conduct your escape without too much effort. It’s a narrow line you have to walk if this is the way you want to go about it, however: Although he has his arguably huge weak spots, he also has years and years of experience to guide him away from whatever it is that you’re trying — he’s dumb, not stupid, if you will. 

Another mix of a curse and a blessing you will face in regards to fleeing is that he won’t ever involve the other Galaxy Rangers in the picture. It’s just not something he could ever justify doing, and besides, he knows how rowdy his people can be: While someone like Boothill could be of some help when he can’t be around to watch you, there’s also the unfortunate fact that the cubs could help you slip away. Moreover, he doesn’t think you would particularly appreciate having some rowdy cowboy bloke keep you company while you’re finally getting to enjoy your precious alone time. 

That being the case, there aren’t many options for companions when it comes to any outside aid you could receive. He takes care to have you hidden away well enough for nobody to figure out where you are, and he isn’t all that close to any of the people in the area. However, if you somehow figured out a way to reach someone like Sparxie, she could very well be your ally as long as you make sure she gets a little content out of the ordeal. True crime does well online, you know.

Oh, and of course, there’s the strange lady downstairs. You don’t know her name — you’re only aware of her existence because of the few times she has come to Ashveil’s door at odd hours of the night to inquire about this and that in her singsong voice — but if you were to put your mind to it, you could find a way to contact her. Of course, such would not be a risk-free mission by any means: From what you’ve gathered, she’s the type of person who would either make it her life mission to help you escape, or alternatively the kind who would laugh in your face and treat the entire thing as a joke, but regardless, it’s a feat worth attempting. 

And, finally, if you wish to make things run smoothly with him, you merely need to go with the flow. At first, it might seem like an entire loss of self, but it simply means adapting to the circumstances and allowing him in a little. Just entertain him a bit — let him caress you here and stroke you there, chat about your day with him, give him a few smiles every once in a while — and you’ll find just how easy things can be with him. In contrast, the one thing you should not do is go laconic: It only causes him to get stressed about your state and consequently bother you more. 

˗ˏˋ ★ 9. Further notes: Is there anything that sets them apart from the other yanderes? What unique qualities do they possess?

There are a lot of quirks with this one. 

First off, the level of communication with him fluctuates heavily, depending on his general mood as well as the time of the day. For the most part, he’s not a very balanced person, for the lack of a better term. He has his ups and downs, and while he doesn’t ever truly lose his cool and become explosive, he gets openly excited, disappointed, playful, and so on. He gets quite impulsive regarding certain things while having ridiculously good self-control over others — it’s sometimes difficult to keep up with him at all. 

To add, he is, frankly put, a bit stupid at times — benevolent but stupid. Every so often, he might ask you for insight on a case he’s trying to solve. He presents you with the clues he has managed to gather and briefs you on the context and the timeline, complaining that ”he just can’t understand what he’s missing”. You skim over the material, reading over a few important-looking lines here and there, and ask him if the-most-obvious-possibility is something he has considered. Very few times in your life have you seen someone’s face light up the way his does as he suddenly pieces the equation together in what you have begun to suspect is an entirely empty mind. 

Expanding on the same issue, there are quite a lot of things he has failed to take into account on the regular, outside of his occupation. He can’t say he has had the honour of sharing his living space with a representative of the female species in a very long time, if ever, and he has a bit of a hard time adjusting to the change. For instance, he has gotten quite used to just walking around shirtless when he feels like it: There’s nobody except for himself and his assistant to ogle at him, so it was never really a big deal. However, he does realize that he needs to make a few changes to his habits when he walks out of the bathroom with his pecks out in their full glory and gets to witness the way your eyes go as wide as the Phantasmoon in the sky. Of course, he takes only a few seconds to get over the initial confusion before promptly making his way to the wardrobe and fetching himself something to cover his top half with, but the event serves as a fair reminder of the fact that he has to bear in mind that he’s now living with a lady. 

Yet, the sudden realizations regarding that very fact don’t stop there. The moment of horror you go through when you wake up one morning with an aching abdomen and a dark red stain on your bottoms couldn’t possibly be put into words, but the mortification doesn’t truly reach its peak until you actually need to go ask him for help. 

As he sees you approaching with unease written all over your face and your arms clutching your stomach, he simply raises his gaze from his phone and greets you with his usual smile, asking you if you slept well, not really catching on to the subtle signs you’re portraying. Even as the unfinished ”I’m having my...” leaves your mouth, spoken in a thin, uncertain tone, the only reaction you get out of him is a quirk of his brow. It genuinely takes a few, agonizingly long moments for him to understand what you’re implying, after which the wordlessly expressed ”the what now?” promptly turns into him practically springing off the couch and rushing to you with his hands held out. While he tries his best, it’s quite possible that you’ll have to explain a good few things to him if you don’t want to suffer the following few days both mentally and physically. 

Then, on an entirely different topic: The one place where his communication is superb happens to be, unfortunately, in his sleep. The amount of words isn’t measured in a few odd mumbles here and there — that much you could deal with — but in full-fledged sentences and more or less elaborate conversations had while out cold. The first time you jolt awake in the middle of the night due to him suddenly having started talking is enough to bring you to the brink of cardiac arrest, but even as you have figured out where the noise is coming from, the problem persists. It’s only after you have banged on the fridge door for a good few minutes that he finally wakes up, befuddled and entirely unaware of what the reason for your irritation could be. 

Though, if there’s one positive thing to be found in the lamentable habit, it’s that you can actually get information out of him while he’s asleep. It’s not often that whatever he’s chatting to himself about makes that much sense, but when it does, you can ask him a simple question or a few, and he might just give you a reasonable answer. For example, if you want to know where he has hidden something, it's the prime time to inquire about it. 

Still, you have to wonder what it is that he’s usually talking about while resting. There are a few recurring topics that you have managed to recognize during the nightly events — a few names of his past acquaintances, perhaps — but more importantly, you’ve gathered that the life he used to lead before he moved on to detective work must have been an eventful one. 

From his side, the issue shows up a little differently. Though he usually encourages you to talk and ask things, his past is among the few things that he won’t ever really bring up beyond surface level if you don’t show overwhelming curiosity about the matter. It doesn’t really have to do with the shame he feels nor the macabre nature of the tale, not the complexity of it all nor the fear knowing the truth might induce in you, but the fact that he’s actually entirely lucid about that part of the equation. It comes down to the fact that he truly doesn’t want to cast a bad light on the Galaxy Ranger — nothing less, nothing more. La Mancha is his name, but if there’s one thing he won’t do, it is making your opinion of the outstanding defenders of justice suffer simply because of his own heinous deeds. Call it incongruity — hypocrisy, even — but it’s one of the few points where he actually upholds his ethical standards. 

Another matter with which his lucidity is surprisingly prevalent is his sense of humour. His jokes, albeit usually on the lighter and relatively dry end, sometimes take a quite morbid and self-deprecating turn. There is bound to be more than one occasion where you’re half asleep on the couch, head leaning against a pillow propped against the armrest, your eyelids heavy, when he decides to spark up a conversation. At first, it’s nothing out of the ordinary, at least for him, but as you don’t really engage in the chat, he goes on a lengthy monologue that quickly turns darker than what you’re used to hearing from him. He talks about feeling tired, worn out by life, about death, as well as how if everything goes as planned, ”soon enough, you might finally be free of this old wolf”. Finishing his speech with a misplaced-sounding laugh, he reaches over to you to give a few gentle pats to your thigh. If you didn’t more or less wish for the outcome the tragedy would cause, you would be a little concerned about his mindscape. 

You don’t really understand what the sentiment behind his words is, either. For all you know, it could just be him trying to be funny, or maybe it’s his way of attempting to elicit a twinge of sympathy in you or to make himself look more lucid and level-headed than he is, but the simple truth is that he processes the overwhelming guilt that way. As said, if he let himself spiral, he absolutely would spiral and he would spiral hard, but as long as he keeps his feelings away from the topic, he can deal with the rest. 

And, in a way, it’s his way of keeping you optimistic, too. He’s all too aware of how much damage he must be doing to your psyche, so to counter the harm, he tries to keep your spirits up, even if it means that he’s going to have to show himself in a poor light. He knows you fear and detest him no matter how much effort he puts into getting you to even as little as tolerate his presence without tearing up or shooting him the meanest glares imaginable, and so, the least he can do is give you a tiny spark of hope that nothing has to be forever. 

Furthermore, he occasionally manages to remind you of the fact that he is, in fact, old; not just the 40-year-old sort of old but old-old. The topic of his actual age hasn’t really come up in any conversation — he seems to avoid talking about it to a degree — but from what you’ve gathered, the years he has behind him can no longer be explained with the ordinary human lifespan. The matter has become apparent with a few things he does, all the way from a couple of oddities in his manner of speech to some strange superstitious beliefs he seems to hold, plus his own claim about ”having been alive for quite a while”. As mentioned, he doesn’t outright reveal his age to you, but with how he doesn’t put that much effort into concealing the fact that he probably has a few centuries behind him, you’ve gotten the picture that the ambiguity he insists to have around the number is more resemblant to the never-ask-women-their-age type of thing.

By and large, he has a tendency to be quite vague with matters you would vastly prefer for him to be candid about. There are certain, heavily off-putting things about him that you’ve been left in the dark about: The first time he suddenly rushes to the fridge in the midst of an entirely unrelated activity leaves you mostly confused, but by the time the noise starts, your bewilderment promptly turns into terror. You back yourself into the farthest corner of the apartment, watching tall shadows get painted across the floor while the box shakes and trembles as if an earthquake had struck it. 

Yet, in a mere few minutes, the episode halts just as abruptly as it began, and soon enough, the man pushes the fridge door open and steps out of the thing, coated in sweat and crystals of frozen blood. You stare at him with wide eyes as he ruffles some of the reddened pieces of ice out of his hair and onto the floor where they melt, after which he notices you and promptly attempts to approach you. He is, however, stopped by the eardrum-shattering screech you let out as you scamper away from him with sheer terror written all over your features, and it’s only then that he realizes how he must come off as. To remedy the situation, he doesn’t say anything, albeit the ”ah, yes, right” is quite readable from his countenance alone, and quickly excuses himself before heading into the bathroom, shuffling and splashing around for a while, and popping back out into the open, entirely topless and consequently having you repeat the exact same reaction as earlier. 

But, aside from all the helter-skelter chaoticism he has going on in his life, the rest of it he tries to make as pleasant as possible for you. He knows he can be quite a handful, both as a person and as a general state of affairs, but with all things he can help, he strives for idyll. He enjoys slow mornings, soft-toned late-night talks, having dinner with you in the dim lighting of his apartment; that sort of thing. Even though such moments are lamentably sparse as he has got quite a lot of balls he needs to juggle on a regular basis, he does his best to decelerate the hectic rhythm of your days with him and stop to think, to see, to feel. Amidst of it all, the idea is actually quite noble. 

... And then, there’s the monkey. Even after spending a good while with Ashveil, truly grasping the dynamic between him and his assistant has been an entirely impossible task. To colour you sufficiently confused would require crayons in all shades of the fucking rainbow: Not only have you never seen a creature such as Mister N before, but from what you’ve gathered, he’s not a pet, he’s not a colleague, but he’s not quite a companion either. Moreover, he’s not around half of the time — perhaps by request — but when he is, he mostly focuses on narrating your captor’s morally questionable deeds in third person. You have yet to decide whether his presence is more of a positive or a negative for your mental well-being. 

Finally, just so you know, Mister N is also an absolute no-go for aid in any escape attempt, at least in the beginning. You’re not even entirely sure where his capabilities lie intelligence-wise: At times, you’re able to have a full-fledged conversation with him, and on others, whatever comes out of his mouth is more akin to a recording. Nevertheless, whatever the case, the one time you ask him to help you in your cause, he politely informs you that ”he is bound by a contract of employment”.

NS-FW

˗ˏˋ ★ 10. General look: How does their sexuality manifest? What does sex mean to them? How horny are they?

He wouldn’t consider himself to be a particularly sexual person. He’s kind of... past that stuff, is how he himself would put it, but as do most people, he still has his urges. 

He doesn’t really entertain thoughts about sex or indulge in the sort of fantasies very often unless a truly attractive person happens to catch his attention. Still, even then, he doesn’t think casual intimacy or the kind would ever truly satisfy his yearning: Call him old-fashioned, but he’s staunchly of the opinion that sex needs to have feelings for it to be truly satisfying. Sure, if he put himself out there, there would be demand for him whether he thinks the notion to be true or not, but he simply needs a hand to hold onto and a heart to connect with, so to speak. 

Though, he has a reoccurring issue where he gets unbearably hot and bothered every once in a while. The bouts come and go, mostly being a nuisance more than anything, but he would be lying if he claimed he didn’t wish for there to be something, or rather, someone to take the passion out on. Of course, he can usually take care of the troublesome bodily effects in the shelter of his office, but the method he has fared with so far becomes a little more tricky to execute when you come into the picture. 

His libido doesn’t really change from what he’s used to with you around. It’s just that now, whenever the mood strikes, he really has to exercise self-control in order not to seem like a total creep. Not to say he isn’t, by definition — that much he can admit to himself — but Aeons, he would just like to hold, to grab, to squish every inch of you, inside and out. 

If you pay attention to his behaviour, it’s relatively easy to tell when the spell strikes him. He tends to take a seat, cross his legs, hold his hand over the lower half of his face, and just stare at you from a short distance away with a pleat between his brows. You’re unable to figure out whether his body language conveys frustration, anger, embarrassment or something else entirely, but over time, the hair-raising thought of there being something more to the conduct starts crossing your mind more often than you would like. 

˗ˏˋ ★ 11. Limit: How long does it take for them to have the darling? What is the first time like? Do they care about the darling’s willingness?

He would never. Never, never, ever is what he keeps telling himself over and over again. His eyes linger on your form, watching the subtle jitter in your movements, the wary looks sent his way, the intermittent bobbing of your throat as you swallow down the tears that persistently threaten to fall from your eyes. It’s so painfully obvious that you’re scared out of your mind even when you don’t pay conscious thought into the fact or try to act brave — he could never, ever bear to see you withdraw even more. 

Or, so he tries to make himself believe. There is no doubt that he doesn’t try his hardest not to give in to his urges, that’s for certain: He promptly excuses himself out of the room whenever you change clothes, he turns his face away whenever you get into any position that could even distantly be likened to a suggestive one, and he takes care of his needs in his own time — yet none of it is enough to smother the feeling. No matter how much mental and physical effort he puts into willing himself not to just grab you to touch, to feel, to consume, none of it is enough. The craving just keeps piling up until the jar is filled to the brim. 

Still, he continues to assure himself that he’s stronger than the ever-swelling, unquenchable thirst inside of him, despite being well aware in the back of his mind that he’s bound to fail sooner or later. It’s a truth he refuses to accept, even when he sees his self-restraint gradually slipping bit by bit over time.

Though he does his best to hide it, you notice a change in his demeanour. It’s not an exact thing you could pinpoint, but your subconscious picks up on something downright sinister from his direction. The feeling is fleeting, however, as within a few minutes, everything is back to normal again — as normal as anything could be with him, anyway — but as the instances get more and more frequent, you grow even further apprehensive of him. You flinch away from his innocent touches, you take longer to fall asleep and go to the bathroom more often during the night, and most glaringly, you start lashing out more. It must be the nerves, he knows, but having to listen to you call him every insult the dictionary holds does still sting a little if he’s being candid. 

But, none of it changes the reality both you and him live in. Deep down, he knows the inevitable is approaching, and you, believing you’re just barely succeeding in keeping him away, are in for a rough night. 

It all happens on the spur of the moment. He doesn’t prepare for it in any way, nor does he, even five minutes prior to the juncture, know that he’s actually going to commit to it. The day is like any other, a good few weeks after your abduction: You’re sitting on the couch, your back facing him, legs pulled to your side, reading some tattered comic book you found lying amongst the flyers on the shelves. There’s nothing even remotely provocative about the setting, yet he just...

He can practically hear the voice in his head vacillating between ”do it, don’t, do it, don’t, go, don’t, go”, like pulling petals off of a flower. He could scratch his skin raw with how he just yearns to grab, grab, and grab, to extinguish his fire in the water that is you. Although his baleful aura could already be potent enough to reach beyond the apartment’s walls, you remain completely oblivious to the sheer intensity with which he stares you down from where he’s standing in the kitchen, his pupils blown wide and his breathing growing more and more rapid by the minute, his skin crawling with utter compulsion. 

The mantra in his mind goes on and on as he leaves his spot next to the wall. With his head pounding from the deluge of desire surging into his veins, he walks across the floor without making a single sound, silently approaching your form from behind. 

Don’t, don’t, don’t, the rapidly shrinking, rational part of his brain begs him, but you’re right there, already at his fingertips, ready for him to devour.

He places his hands on either side of you on the couch’s backrest. Disturbed by the shuffling, you lay the comic book down on your lap, tilt your chin up, and find that an upside down image of the man is staring down at you. For a moment, you think it’s just one of his affectionate episodes again, but as you notice the fervid, demented glint in his half-lidded eyes, your heart drops to your stomach. 

The alarm bells in your head begin sounding immediately, but though you think you’re as fast as one could possibly be when flinging your legs off the couch and trying to pull out of his reach, his metal-clad hand manages to find a secure grip on your shoulder. 

The full panic response flares up in a fraction of a second. You take hold of his forearm with both of your hands, yanking with all your might as you try to free yourself of his grasp, only to find that there’s no way for you to match the man’s strength. He feels a sharp twinge in his chest when he catches sight of your face; wide eyes, scrunched-up brows, ajar mouth — you look frightened beyond repair, yet you still try to mend your swiftly cracking façade with feigned aggression. Even as his other hand reaches to grab you as well, instead of letting the terror overwhelm you, you think fast and plunge your nails into his arm. 

He stifles a hiss as the pricking pain strikes him. It’s nowhere near severe enough to impede him, however, as the interruption barely manages to stagger his actions before he makes the thoughtless decision to carry out the deed in full. With an expression disproportionately despondent compared to the red-hot arousal he’s battling, he seizes both of your arms, swings his leg over the couch’s backrest, and pushes you down on the cushions. 

The flailing does very little to help when the man, much larger in frame than you, forces you on your back and climbs on top of you, settling between your legs and wresting your thighs apart. Your hands, though held down by his own on your shoulders, reach for his arms, his chest, his face, anything they could possibly reach, yet the only thing your struggle achieves is knocking his hat off of his head and onto the floor where it lands beside a pile of papers. 

A gruff sigh slips out of his throat as his hair falls past the sides of his now deeply flushed face. Gazing down at you with a wildened, nearly startled look on his features, he catches his breath for a moment before then opening his mouth. 

”We can go to the bed”, he then huffs out in a strained, hushed voice. 

It’s hard to make sense of him over the relentless, throbbing noise of your own heartbeat in your ears. The words blur into an incomprehensible jumble, and you don’t immediately understand that you’re even being talked to. It’s only as he repeats himself, panting out ”I can take you to the bed, we can go to the bed, we don’t need to do it here” all in the same, laboured breath, that the terrifying realization hits.

The sheer volume with which you screech out the ”no” nearly ruptures his eardrums, so much so that he almost lets go of you out of reflex. The window of opportunity is gone in a flash, however, and the strength he’s pressing you against the couch with doubles. Biting into his lip, he moves one of his hands just below your throat in favour of releasing the other one which, in turn, latches over your mouth. He attempts to gently hush you, making sure that you can still breathe through your mouth, yet his efforts bear no fruit as instead of settling down, you gain brand new fuel into your strife. 

The frantic fight has you exhausting every option available. Ripping at the blackened length of his prosthetic, you couldn’t care less about the line of red that the nail on his wrist scrapes across your cheek. Furthermore, though he doesn’t feel any bit of it, you try to bite down on the metal on his fingers, using every last bit of strength in your jaw and no doubt causing pain to yourself in the process. Fearful tears gather at your waterlines as you, despite your position, spit violent, unintelligible curses and threats at him through your clenched teeth.

He really doesn’t know what to say. The thoughts in his head are scrambled, chaotic, cloudy, aroused. In the back of his mind, he understands, he knows that he should release you the very same instant and comfort you, to promise you that it’s all going to be okay, that you don’t have to be scared, that he would never, never, ever, but all of the overwhelming pity and sympathy, every last bit of it, though mirrored on his countenance, is overridden by the distorted, bottomless, maroon-hued pit of his obsession. The light in his irises diminishes. 

With a raspy, deep inhale, rather than speaking words of consolation and reassurance, he utters a single sentence. ”Sometimes you just have to do things you don’t enjoy”, he says. 

His heart, undoubtedly in sync with yours, is beating so fast that he has to wonder if the tremulous feeling could end up being his demise. Momentarily letting go of your sternum, he fumbles around, trying to locate the handle of his cane by his side before managing to find a grip on the metal. Then, lifting his hand off your mouth, he snatches hold of one of your wrists, then the other, all in one, swift movement. Wrestling your limbs down above your head, he proceeds to squish them against the cushions with the twisting shaft of his cane, pinning you in place like you were a butterfly, after which he begins ineptly attempting to strip himself of his clothes with one hand. 

Your windpipe strains with the short, gaspy breaths with which you forcefully pull air into your lungs. Slowly but surely, yet all too quickly, the fright and anxiety begin superseding the valour and fury, and what began as a fierce struggle now simmers down into tears. Pushing against the weight of his cane one more time to no avail, you squeeze your eyes shut and sob out a broken ”please don’t hurt me, I don’t want it to hurt”. 

His fingers, presently busy trying to fiddle the buttons of his vest open, freeze in their tracks. As if genuinely wounded by the accusation, he has to blink a few times before answering you, telling you ”it’s not going to hurt” in a much too sad of a tone. The words, however, only work to escalate the situation further as you proceed to let out yet another cry and repeat the same thing: ”Please don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me”, all in a choked, fear-laden voice that grates on his ears and lacerates his heartstrings. Again, he answers with the same promise, ”nothing is going to hurt, I’m not going to hurt you”, but with very little results. 

He suddenly finds that the emotion burning in his chest is no longer plain pity but slowly morphing into frustration. He succeeds in stripping himself of both his overcoat and the vest underneath, carelessly throwing the articles of clothing onto the dusty floor behind the couch. For a minute, he considers trying to scuffle his shirt off as well, but after taking one more confirmative glance at your state, he abandons the idea. Instead, he settles for kicking his feet out of his boots, yanking his trousers and underwear down his legs with one hand, and tossing the rest of his garments in the same pile with the rest.

You’re dangling on the verge of passing out while simultaneously feeling sharper than ever. The shaft of the cane digs into the soft part of your wrists, dully painful, yet not nearly enough to avert your attention. Refusing to let your eyes stray towards what lies between his now bare thighs, you stare directly at the ceiling without actually seeing anything you’re looking at. Your midriff continues to heave with your erratic breaths, only interrupted by the terrified cry you let out when his fingers slip underneath your clothes’ waistline. 

He only manages to yank the fabric halfway down your thighs before being halted by his own body blocking the rest of the way. Quickly going over his options, he settles for carefully grasping the back of your knee, pushing his own body forward, and consequently lifting your hips off the cushions and folding your form in half . Naturally, you screech in response, desperately battling his grip like a prey in its predator’s jaws, but as your other thigh joins the one now pressed against your chest, you can do nothing to prevent him from ridding you of your bottoms as well as your undergarments. Then, after giving you one last, lust-sick look, he takes in a sharp inhale, lowers his face down in between your legs, and latches his mouth onto your bare bits. 

Every last inch of your form, down to your fingertips, winces forcefully as the sensation of his tongue slithering around your nethers reaches your brain. Your mouth falls wide open to let out a startled mix of a wail and a shriek, after which you attempt to kick out the intrusion, to ward off his weight, only to compulsively arch your back as you feel his tongue nudge against your clit. The sensation, so utterly infringing and hellacious that your own limbs refuse to do anything but tremble in place, travels all the way up to your guts and past your stomach, reaching into spots inside you that you didn’t even know could feel. 

A pitiful, high-pitched yip is all that makes it out of your throat before your entire body suddenly tautens up, going as rigid as a board. Every last muscle in your body snaps tense as a mere few moments’ worth of the unbearably intense pleasure shoves you into an adrenaline-tinted climax. You fight for your breath, feeling like you can’t get enough air while being utterly drunk on oxygen, before the world then completely flips on its axis, and your eyes roll back into your head. 

He notices the spasms, of course. It requires every last bit of his depleted self-control for him to disconnect his mouth from your cunt so soon, but in favour of not pushing you past your limits, he brings his face up and wipes his mouth on the back of his forearm. He takes in the sight of your rhythmically convulsing body, your ajar mouth, and your half-lidded eyes. What little still remained of his restraint disappears into the murky, sex-laden air. 

Bringing his digits to his mouth, he bites down on the thin fabric of his glove and pulls it off his hand before dropping it over the couch back. Then, without granting you more than a moment’s pause, he prods his middle and ring finger against your entrance. 

Your hole contracts without delay, halting his progress. Furthermore, as he finds that you’re sufficiently slick — even surprisingly so — the notion of fingering you suddenly feels pointlessly cruel. Already being much too far into the act to drag the beginning out, he promptly changes his mind and decides to move on to the last trial. 

You’re only able to gasp for air and let the tears flow when he wraps his hand around his rock-hard cock and brings it to your bits. Though you still resist the intrusion, putting every last fibre of your being into tensing up your lower half, with a few, insistent prods, he’s able to get the tip in. 

You just cry, cry and cry and yell at him to stop, straining against his hold like him connecting with you like this were the worst possible thing that could ever have happened to you. His trembling hand comes up to your face, cradling your cheek as gently as he possibly could and clumsily attempting to wipe some of the tears off your lashes while slowly, carefully urging his member deeper and deeper inside you. Your entire body quakes along with your sobs, mourning the way you’re stretched out bit by bit, yet still, despite the sincere, utterly uncovered show of pure distress, the words of comfort take much too long to find the tip of his tongue.

”Listen to me”, he tells you in a husky, soft voice. ”You’re not in any pain. It’s only a little pressure”, he assures you, ”only a little pressure right here. Do you feel that?”

His touch trails off your face and slides down to where you’re connected. Cautiously, he presses around the area of your abdomen, tracing the shape of his cock inside of you, caressing the skin beneath your navel. ”It’s not painful, it’s only pressure.”

You make the mistake of looking down at where the two of you are now connected. You watch as the shaft of his dick disappears into your entrance inch by inch, breaching more and more of you. 

Though he himself doesn’t sound sure of what he’s saying, he isn’t entirely wrong about the sensation he describes. There’s no keen, panging ache, nor does the stretch bring you anything past discomfort, but just the feeling of being penetrated by him throbs more than anything else could. The last, tearful ”no”s and ”stop”s mellow out into small, distantly frantic snivels as you finally let go of the fray you were desperately clinging onto, instead focusing on what little you’re able to control. You clench your teeth, swallow your cries down, squeeze your hands into fists, and just pant in place when the final bit of his length makes its way into your cunt. 

He tries not to get lost in the feeling — he really, really tries not to. It’s just that when he looks at your face, the wet streaks, the blush playing on your features, the rapid rise and fall of your chest, he’s simply overwhelmed by the zeal to ravish you. Deep within his being, there’s a physical, racking ache to just take you all to himself, and right then and there, as he takes in the view of your sorry form, he lets go of the last iota of his sense. Carefully dragging his hips back until only the tip of his member remains inside of you, he begins thrusting into your bits. 

With one hand still holding onto the cane that’s pinning you down on the couch, he moves the other back to your face. Tenderly setting his palm over your eyes still directed at what’s happening between your thighs, he covers your view of the harrowing sight and leans down into your ear. In a tone no louder than whisper, he asks you to simply listen to his voice. 

”You’re doing a good job”, he tells you as he rocks his hips against yours in measured yet still palpably impatient motions. You respond to him with a defeated, airy sniffle, helplessly attempting to close your legs around his body, then clenching around him and consequently drawing out a hoarse moan out of his mouth. Nevertheless, he keeps what little remains of his composure and resumes comforting you. ”It’s going to be over soon”, he promises, planting a wet, cold kiss on your temple. 

In the back of his mind, he knows that what the result of his deeds will turn out to be is the farthest thing from the eyes he actually, truly wants you to look at him with. There’s no love, no adoration, no curiosity in your misery-drowned gaze, yet at the same time, all he does is push the excruciating guilt aside and continues fucking into you. 

˗ˏˋ ★ 12. Preferences: What is sex with them like? What sort of stuff are they into? What kind of kinks do they have?

He’s a mixed back. Once again, he leans towards the traditional end because of his age and life experience: He doesn’t really understand all the fancy, new stuff that the youngsters are getting their hands on in the name of pleasure, but then again, on the other hand, he really can’t say that he’s not at least a tiny bit intrigued. Keeping up with the times has always been a task he has had to put conscious effort into, but, you know, a little experimentation can’t hurt. 

- Insane Mouth Game, First Runner-up

Voracity and all.

He understands that the inclination probably stems from the beast in his arm, at least to some degree, but at the same time, he really couldn’t care less what the insatiable desire to just have his mouth somewhere on you is caused by. The sheer amount of pleasure he gets out of tasting you couldn’t possibly be put into words. 

All that to say that the man quite literally eats pussy like he might die tomorrow. It’s easily his favourite sort of foreplay, and sometimes the main course as well. What lies between your legs seems to almost have a gravitational pull to it: Wherever it is that he’s getting it on with you at, it won’t be long until the kisses he’s sucking onto your neck begin trailing lower and lower before finally reaching their inevitable destination. At that point, you can’t stop him from getting where he wants to be — it’s best just to accept your fate if you value your sanity as well as your pelvic muscles.

And, he’s so preposterously good at what he does that it feels like you could pass out from the sheer depth of the spasms bullying your lower half. He’s unfortunately the type that simply doesn’t unlatch his mouth from your cunt after he has gotten the first taste — he just keeps going until he feels you finish or you manage to successfully land a strong enough of a kick at his head. Moreover, his technique is unmatched as well: He likes to not so much suck on anything but swirl his tongue all around, focusing on one spot at a time and systematically driving you crazy with each passing second. The one thing he has found gets the most squirming out of you is when he pushes his tongue into your entrance and prods around a bit; not only do you try to fight him off like your life depended on it, but you have a habit of coming within the same minute, too. 

From your point of view, the entire thing is, of course, terribly violating — not just psychologically but in the regard of your nerve endings as well. It’s intense, it’s beyond lewd, and ugh, when his fingers dig into the flesh on your thighs to hold your tremoring hips down, you know there’s nothing you can do to stop him from dragging you into his personal, blissful hell. It’s the sort of ticklish, almost painful pleasure that borders overstimulation and makes your eyes water, too: You don’t think he’s even nearly aware of the extent of his power. 

It’s not just your cunt, either. You see, just a little bit down, there’s another spot that’s particularly sensitive, and who would he be if he didn’t take advantage of that fact. In other words, he really likes to eat ass. 

He truly needs to put effort into keeping you down when he gets to it, either by locking your knees over his shoulders and enduring your heels bashing against his back or pushing your lower body against your chest and effectively folding you in half like a flipknife. He already knows that his neighbours downstairs won’t appreciate the sheer amount of noise you make when he forces you to offer your behind to his mouth, but then again, he’s in no state to give a flying fuck about who might be listening in on the ordeal. 

He just wants to taste you. Whichever hole, in whatever position, he wants it. He tends to switch around in the middle of the session, too; his patterns are entirely unpredictable. Of course, the tendency extends to just about any patch of your skin in general — you can be sure that by the time he himself gets his share of physical pleasure, almost every last square inch of your skin is covered in his saliva. 

He usually starts around your neck, shoulders and jaw. Dragging his tongue up along the trail of your jugular, he makes sure to savour the salty savour of your sweat before moving along to the next area. He figures out your sensitive spot quite early on, and as soon as he does, the assault on them is relentless. Behind your ear, underneath your chin, at the juncture of your neck — no spot is safe from him. 

Oh, and traditional kisses — very much his thing. Of course, it ties to the aforementioned habits, but above all, he thinks that the act is, at its core, that of love, and he wants to share that feeling with you. It’s just that when he really gets into it, it feels like he’s trying to suck the life out of you with how mercilessly he goes at it. As soon as his tongue gets past your tightly pursed lips, he wriggles it right down your throat. Your teeth clash together, his lips are just about glued against yours, and he hardly even remembers to make sure you can still get air in the midst of it all. 

Aside from the obvious ones, he has quite a few areas on your body that he likes to torment with his mouth. Your inner thighs, your upper back, your abdomen, and, last but not least, your pretty breasts. Your nipples, namely, are where he focuses the rest of his attention whenever he’s busy fingering you, for instance. Even if he has been impatient enough not to get you out of your top, he can just roll the thing up and past your chest to access what he’s seeking. Much like is the case with your bits, the way he shuts his lips around your cold-perked nipple before sucking on it and circling it with his tongue is enough to have your heart palpitating. 

Then there’s the marking. It’s another thing he vastly enjoys, or simply instinctively takes part in, whether that be with gentle bites or dark hickeys littering the entirety of your upper body. He tries not to do any actual damage despite having the uncontrollable urge to quite literally get into your flesh, but it’s also unfortunately something he fails at almost every time. When he gets too deep into the mindless headspace, the limit of what’s too much becomes hazy: He buries his teeth into your shoulder, biting down harder by the second — just a little deeper, a tiny bit deeper won’t hurt — and the next second, the taste of blood bursts into his mouth, accompanied by a shrill, frantic shriek from you. The sheer primality of the noise is enough to yank him right out of the trance, and when he pulls back to face your wide, tear-filled eyes and your ajar mouth, his sultry mood takes a bit of a blow. You look startled, shocked, confused; the expression on your features mostly translates to a pitiful ”what did I do”, which he fails to find the answer to. He really doesn’t know what to do with himself nor how to properly comfort you without making it all worse, and thus, the rest of the session suffers from a lachrymose spirit. 

Finally, a very specific thing he likes to do is kiss and lick directly over your ear. Not just the area around, not just the shell, but right over the entrance of the canal where each and every sound and sensation is sent right down to your spinal cord. It’s horrid just how visceral the feeling is: The shivers it induces — the sort that travel all the way down to your back and have your body twitching involuntarily — could be enough to hard-reset your entire nervous system. However, no matter how palpably uncomfortable it makes you, it’s something he ends up doing almost every single time. 

- Talk, talk, talk

He, as are quite a handful of the people his sort, is largely unable to shut up during the deed. Talking just comes naturally to him, especially when he’s not putting much thought into what slips out of his mouth. He enters a sort of a flow state whenever he starts thinking more with his downstairs than with his brain, which translates to steamy, lustful words. 

He really likes to keep his lips next to your ear. As established in the previous section, he finds that the sheer intimacy of getting to stimulate such a vulnerable part of you gets him off like nothing else. He does, unfortunately, have an absurdly mellow voice, and even though you’re consciously aware of the fact that you’re not in his arms out of your own volition, it’s practically impossible to resist the sedative, subjugating effect it has on you. 

He likes to praise you, especially when he gets into one of his more confident and dominant moods. Surely you’re aware of just how lovely you are? In his eyes, there’s no sight more endearing, beautiful, utterly enchanting than you underneath him, struggling to gasp for air with how your senses are being loaded with rapture. The look on your face just begs him to repeat ”good girl, good girl” again and again as he gathers the tears swelling at the corners of your unfocused eyes on the back of his finger. The words don’t really seem to evoke any coherent reaction from you, but if the way your bits clench on him when his voice tickles the shell of your ear is anything to go by, there must be at least something happening behind the cloudy veil over your mind. 

Another thing he tends to vocalize a lot are quietly spoken questions about if what he’s doing is performing its role. ”Does it feel nice right here? Or here?” he asks you as the pads of his fingers slide up and down the slit between your labia, circling here, pressing there, trying to find the exact spot that forces your thighs to tauten and your jaw to go slack.

And, it’s not only the verbal, either: He groans, hisses, moans, huffs and sighs, all in the same, hot breath against the side of your face. He’s not the silent kind even when he has nothing to say, and aside from the mumbled strings of words that could as well be dialogue in a horror movie — ”I just want to devour you”, ”let me take a bite out of you” — he gets sophisticatedly animalistic about the sounds he lets out. It’s like ASMR gone wild, except that the things described in the recording are all too real and happening to you. 

- The fucking chair (literal)

Remember the chair he put you in when he abducted you? Yeah, so about that. 

He’s not that much into restraints and whatnot, but at the same time, he would be lying through his teeth if he claimed that the setting didn’t excite him at least a tiny bit. The power dynamic of having you bound and sitting still while he gets to slowly and delicately pull all sorts of reactions out of your shivering form is a high like no other for him. 

Though, it’s a bit of a hassle to get you down on the chair itself, and nude or at least bottomless, no less. You sure put up a good tussle whenever you catch sight of his flushed face and wandering hands, but alas, he’s much stronger than you could ever hope to be; wrestling you down, stripping you of your clothes, picking you up and planting you on the seat only takes a few minutes at most, at which point you’re entirely under his mercy. Just like the first time, he binds your ankles to the chair legs, your wrists and waist to the backrest, and sets up a rope contraption that travels underneath the seat and connects your thighs together, preventing you from closing them on him. 

After that, the teasing starts. He might have an impatient streak to him, but the lack of struggling appears to quell the trait a little. Whenever you’re tied up, he spends at least a good half an hour just caressing here, brushing against that spot, giving you a gentle pinch right there. It’s simultaneously overwhelmingly sensuous and horribly invasive, creating the same, eye-watering quivers as his mouth in your bits does, only without even having to properly touch you. He drags the pads of his fingers along your ribs, rubs around where your hipbone protrudes under the skin, and hums into your ear in the low timbre that could send you into a seizure. 

Whatever happens as the main event is largely up to his mood. He could simply rub one out of you, properly finger you, he could eat you out if he has managed to set the bindings so that your bottom is close enough to the chair’s edge, or if he’s feeling really adventurous, he could invest in a small vibrator to torment you with. He’s not that keen on any tools — he has enough dexterity in his fingers alone, and besides, isn’t that a little posh — but nevertheless, just to be able to try it out every now and then, he probably gets a bullet vibe to keep somewhere for a rainy day.  

In addition, he talks you through it all, no matter what it is precisely that he’s doing to you. The position he prefers for the chair act is already one that forces his face close to yours: Majority of the time, it’s the most practical to just stay behind the chair and work his magic over your shoulder. Since his cheek is already more or less pressed against yours, he doesn’t see the reason not to murmur a few ”you’re doing well”s and other words of praise into your ear. 

To amplify the effect, he might blindfold you, too. It’s the only time he properly deprives you of your senses aside from how he sets his palm over your eyes every now and then, but despite its seldom nature, it’s easily among the top three most intense experiences with him. When there’s nothing for you to focus on visually, whether that be his hand in between your legs or the tear-blurred view of the apartment’s grey interior, there’s not much left for you to do other than to concentrate on the feeling of his digits digging into the front wall of your entrance and rubbing leisurely circles over your clit. You can try to stifle the shivers, flinches and squeaks, but with how your hole shudders around his fingers, it’s quite easy for him to tell just how far past your defences he has managed to invade. 

It’s, all in all, a sensual time which is precisely what makes it so agonizing for you. The utter sense of danger is something you could never escape with him, but combining that with the climax he’s steadily working you towards with whatever means he has chosen for the occasion, it’s merely a question of time before your mind begins drawing connections you would rather not have it make. Yet, having your essence quite literally soak the chair when he’s done would suggest that your body and brain already disagree on the matter. 

- Gentle old-school stuff

When he’s in his more rational state of mind, Ashveil is, as might have come a little clearer with the time you’ve spent with him, quite thoughtful on the regular. As far as he’s able to, he prioritizes your health, happiness and safety above all, and though his urges get the best of him much more often than he would like, he does his utmost not to torment you with their consequences. 

That, and being the age he is, he really just wants it soft and slow sometimes. All the hecticity can only build up to a certain point until he needs release from it which ultimately translates to his lovesick gaze and uninvited touch. 

It’s never anywhere else than on the mattress beside his fridge. If anything, he wants you to have a comfortable surface to lie on — he can do every last bit of the work beyond that. He lays you down on the bedding, puts a pillow beneath your head and another one under your hips, and starts warming your body up for the deed. He doesn’t tease like he perhaps would any other time: Instead, he caresses you with just enough firmness in his touch, curls his fingers against the deep, ribbed spot inside you, and listens to your tiny gasps and sniffles as you simultaneously try to distance yourself from the sensation while being entirely unable to do so. 

Prone-bone is the position he always settles for during such occasions. Yes, the practical appeal of it is strong — it’s effortless to hold you down with his own bodyweight alone — but it also allows him to feel the closest to you physically. The skin-to-skin contact of having his bare chest pressed against your back induces a feeling in him that would be difficult to simulate in any other setting, and loosely caging your head in between his arms offers him a deep sense of security. You’re safe, right here, with him — he has got you, you can let it all go. He hopes that though the alarm bells are likely fighting to overpower any other sound in your brain, the position could still bring you a semblance of comfort. 

He fucks you well, too. His cock reaches deep into you, yet not far enough to border the line of overstretching you. It’s the sort of perfectly fulfilling, profoundly satisfying feeling of the sweetest spot in your insides getting nudged against over and over again until you start unwillingly relaxing into the sensation. There’s truly no way for your lucid mind to win the fight. 

Another reason he looks forward to having you in such a submissive position is because it’s the closest he could ever get to seeing how you would act as a willing participant. Your face is warm, you don’t really tend to cry (at least not openly), and when he leans down to press an open-mouthed kiss on the side of your face, he comes to find that your eyes are hazy and half-lidded with concentration. If he didn’t know better, he would assume you were enjoying the act. 

Nevertheless, he consoles you throughout the whole ordeal. Whereas he would typically praise you, he now adapts his wording to keep you calm, docile. It’s not like you could do much against him — he has you pinned down, stomach pressed against the mattress — but he still goes out of his way to tell you that ”you’re going to be alright” and ”just relax, just breathe” while he once again pushes his member inside you to the hilt. You don’t really react to his words in any way other than letting out a quiet whimper or a moan every now and then, but judging from how you’re mostly sweaty putty in his hands when he’s done, he has to be doing at least something right. 

˗ˏˋ ★ 13. Punishment: What do their sexual punishments look like? What methods do they prefer?

It’s not often that Ashveil resorts to any sexual punishments, as is with punishments in general with him. Furthermore, it’s less ”resorting” and more ”yielding”. The conditions that have to be fulfilled in order to get him to that point are that one, he needs to be really mad, and two, he needs to be mad horny. The former might actually be the more difficult to achieve out of the two since getting truly angry at you is something that requires him to be in a very specific state of mind, but the latter is more or less achievable without you having to do anything in particular. And, the lamentable reality of the matter is that the two states feed into each other. 

The sessions are sporadic and short in nature, but the one thing he’s inclined to fall back on is spanking you; either with simply his hand or, seldom, his cane. It channels his mood quite well in the sense that the act is both stimulating for him but also takes care of the issue at hand — that being putting you back in your place. 

He gives you plenty of warnings before he actually gets up to it. In case the quite straightforward ”I’m going to reprimand you if you don’t quit the behaviour” isn’t enough to have you stop the yelling, flailing, or whatever it is that you’re doing, he eventually just walks up to you, takes you by the arm, drags you to the couch, and bends you over his lap. 

It doesn’t really matter to him whether it’s on bare skin or with some fabric in between, but regardless, you’re going to have him land quite a few firm smacks on your butt to make up for the misbehaviour. He doesn’t make you count the strikes, and it’s not necessarily about the humiliation factor as much as it’s just that he couldn’t come up with anything better — again, he’s “traditional” like that — but if anything, the cause-and-effect of the series of events becomes quite clear to you. Also, he doesn’t slap your behind raw like someone like Anaxa would: Rather, he just goes on for a little while until deciding that enough is enough. 

He makes sure that you know he’s pissed via verbal means as well. ”How does that feel, huh?!” is a straight, common quote he snaps at you. The tone of his voice is nowhere near the actual rage you know he’s capable of, but it still leaves very little to guesswork.  

Then, as mentioned, he occasionally uses the cane, too. Whether he wants to admit it or not, using the tool is purely for the histrionics: The metal stick isn’t exactly suitable for spanking in itself, but what’s important is that the message makes it across. Moreover, it probably hurts a little worse than just his palm — the reddish stripes the shaft leaves on the skin don’t fade until a day later — and it usually gets you to change your mind faster than just the palm of his hand would. 

He sometimes threatens to stick the cane inside you. He won’t, obviously, as the end of the thing is as sharp as a stiletto, but the mere implication is enough to get you to sing a different tune. For good measure, he punctuates the threat by rubbing the cane’s stem along your bits just to sell the performance, but by that point, the stint has generally already taken a carnal turn. 

If his arousal starts overriding the anger, you may very well end up with him ditching the actual punishment and instead just giving into his urges to finger you a little. He still tries to mask it as if he’s disciplining you, but if the flush on his features is anything to go by, his thoughts are in an entirely different place. When his hand once again makes contact with your ass, his touch doesn’t leave you but lingers at the curve, after which he just abandons the act and dips his digits between your thighs. Of course, the sudden change in tone has you squealing and trying to get his hands off of you, but it’s really no use fighting him after he has gotten himself into such a state. 

Yes, you might be crying during the punishment, but more often than not, the tears are of the wrathful sort. Such conduct is most likely precisely what you need the correction for anyway: Usually, even with his hand or cane coming down on your behind, you keep the attitude up — kicking, screeching, clawing at anything at arm’s length and even attempting to sink your teeth into his leg if it’s all that’s available. However, if the whole ordeal goes on long enough, your fuse burns out, and what started as ire dies down to pathetic sobs. 

It’s what ends the session. If there’s one thing he’s deplorably weak to, it’s your tears: No matter how irritating you might have been all day, the second you start snivelling from sorrow, the sympathy trigger releases. He tries to bring a natural-sounding pause to the punishment, but in reality, his attempt merely ends up being a ”I suppose that’s enough” before pulling your sorry form into his embrace. That said, if you’re of the easily crying sort, you certainly have an unexpected advantage against him in such situations. 

˗ˏˋ ★ 14. Aftermath: What does their aftercare look like? Is there any?

It’s a bit of a mess. Not nearly as much of a mess as it could be, but still a mess. Post-nut clarity hits him like the Phantasmoon had just fallen on him, and no matter how much he mentally prepares himself for the drop, it’s always the same. 

At first, when he finishes, it almost appears as if he’s annoyed, but it is, of course, not the actual case. Though his expression is difficult, and the manner in which he swallows could be read as irritated, it’s merely him battling with the soul-crushing devastation of once again having succumbed to the urges he has so tried to curb. He simply looks down at you as his panting slows down, entirely unsure of what to say or do. His breathing has a distinct, strange pattern to it at such moments: He takes in a quick, quiet inhale, holds his breath for a few moments, and then lets his shoulders fall before repeating the sequence anew. It’s an odd sight to witness. 

After getting over the initial shock, he gathers the shards of his shattered resolve in favour of taking care of you. With his touches gentler than if he were holding a butterfly, he releases whatever part of you he may have been holding down and moves to cradle your shoulders, your neck, your head. His face falls into a very specific, heartbroken look where he appears as if he’s about to cry as he gathers your worn, flushed and quite possibly sniffling form off of whatever surface the two of you were on, talking in a voice softer than feathers, murmuring ”oh, oh no, oh darling...”. 

The effect he intends for the action to have is, however, the complete opposite, as instead of you resting against him, the softness triggers a fit of wailing anger in you. With all of the little strength you have left in you, you start beating your fists against his bare chest while tearfully screaming ”don’t touch me, don’t touch me” over and over again until your voice begins to grow hoarse. Still, instead of respecting your wish, he holds you through the entire episode, weathering all the punches, scratches and bites you manage to make at him, all the way until the fire in you slowly withers down, and he’s left with a shuddering, twitching, gently sobbing human being in his arms. At that point, he cautiously allows you to pull a back to have a look at your face. He observes your misery-stained cheeks, your unfocused eyes, the smear of blood — much more probably his than yours — across the corner of your mouth. If he were to drown out all the other chaos of the situation, he could almost focus on imagining the sound of your rapidly beating, oh-so wounded heart. 

He knows you probably find his embrace trapping, if not suffocating. Despite there being no more vigour left in your weak smacks against his sternum, you still continue trying to beat him off of you. Still, he just can’t: He, as well as your overclocked heart, need the closeness, the firm touch, to mentally survive the next half an hour. 

It’s only after a good while that he dares to gently, carefully disconnect his arms from around you and allow you to hold yourself up. More often than not, he judges the time frame correctly, and when he pulls back and out of your immediate personal space, you usually don’t lash out anymore. Instead, you tend to just bury your face in your hands or your knees, sob quietly, and shiver as if you were cold. Out of instinct, he picks up the closest blanket or blanket-like object and wraps the thing around your shoulders, encasing you in the softness like a cocoon, before cautiously standing up and heading for the wardrobe. 

You don’t get to be left alone for longer than a moment, for in just a minute or two, he comes back with a fresh set of underwear and some clothing for you. Having tried to find something that you would feel the safest in, the piece usually ends up being simple to put on while covering as much skin as possible. A huge sweater, an oversized hoodie, maybe even something of his that’s much too large on you, and when he gets back to you, he puts it on you himself. Quietly instructing you to hold your arms up, he slips the garment past your head, slides your hands into the correct gaps and takes care to pull the hem down as far as it goes, before then allowing you the privacy of getting the rest of the clothes on yourself. 

Typically, at this point in time, you’re much too tired to do anything but stare into space for a few minutes before your head starts drooping. He waits for a short while, just in case you were to suddenly gain one more burst of energy, but as it’s obvious that you’re one blink away from falling asleep, he has you get some rest. Most of the time, you’re already in your bed, but in case you’re not, he curves his arm underneath the back of your thighs, hoists you up, and carries you there. You don’t really resist him in any way when he tucks you in and spends the few remaining minutes of your waking time caressing your head like you were the most precious thing in the universe. 

The extent of the aftercare stretches on to whenever it is that you wake up, too. If the ordeal took place in the evening (or whatever ”evening” is for him), you tend to sleep overnight, but if it was during the day, a few hours of dozing usually suffice. In both cases, he stays awake for the entire time, pulling an all-nighter if needed, just so when you wake up, you have more instance of his damage control waiting for you. 

It doesn’t matter how much rest you’ve had, you still rouse feeling like you could cry. He understands that much, and so, when you open your eyes, you have him waiting for you by the door with a dish in his hand. As non-threateningly as he’s able to, he makes his way to you, crouches beside your sleep-hazed form, and offers you utensils and a small plateful of food. Albeit it’s visibly home-cooked and a little rough around the edges, it’s clearly made with you in mind: The food itself is to your taste, and he has arranged the portion in the shape of a flower in an attempt to make it a little cute, charming, something you wouldn’t liken to being a bribe. 

And you eat it. Despite your eyes all too obviously swimming with tears even with your best efforts to conceal your rebuilding distress, you grab the utensils in your shaky hands and bring a piece of the dish to your lips. All the while, you keep your gaze locked with his own as if terrified that he could lunge at you at any moment. 

He swallows. Then, tipping his chin down and directing his eyes at the floor between the two of you, in a quiet, soft voice, he asks you if you would allow him to check on and take care of any marks he might have left on your body. 

He doesn’t raise his gaze to make sense of whatever feeling your expression might be conveying, and whether or not you agree to his request is entirely up to you. Silence is taken as a ”no”, and he won’t in any way object to a blatant rejection, but if you’re not opposed to the suggestion, he gives you all the time you need to finish the meal, after which he takes you to the bathroom. 

Spreading a towel on the cold tiles, he asks you to sit down on the floor as he goes to open the first aid cabinet and set up some disinfectant and bandages on the sink. Then, as carefully as he could possibly be, he begins working through the remnants of his sick edacity.

He makes a point of not having you strip yourself of anything while he takes care of the wounds. Instead, he gently tugs the collar of your top towards the area he’s checking before cleaning the tooth marks and dressing the spots. No matter how cautious he is with his touches, you still spend the entire time trembling and wincing whenever his cold hands make contact with your skin, but despite the apparent concern it awakens in him, he stays silent. He tries his absolute best, but in the end, his utmost usually doesn’t end up being enough to stop the eventual, fresh wave of tears from rolling. 

Lastly, as a complete sidenote: If you were to ever be up for it, he would be the biggest fan of the most diabolical pillow talk topics ever. Not only the absurd, off-genre sort, say, ”what’s your favourite pizza topping”, but the horridly morbid ones that mostly make you go what the fuck on top of the emotional dissonance as well: ”You know, one time I was hired to settle an infidelity case, and I walked in on the wife trying to hack the husband’s leg off” would be his go-to story to start with. When it comes to certain things, his mind functions in strange ways. 

˗ˏˋ ★ 15. Further notes: Is there anything that sets them apart from the other yanderes sex-wise? Are there any unique aspects to them?

To start with, a very prominent quality of his is that you get to have a bit of a say when it comes to the sexual realm of things, but in a very twisted way. The say in question is minimal, but it’s still there: When the switch flips and he consciously turns a part of his feelings off in favour of getting to take you, there’s usually not much you can do, but if you put up a genuinely good scuffle, his drive can be extinguished. It depends heavily on the day, too: Sometimes, he’s prepared to put you in your place even if that means having the session stretch on for twice as long as he initially intended, yet on other days, if you kick, punch, bite, scratch, screech and cry enough, he might just decide that the fight is not worth it. Getting his dick wet while you’re making sure that he gets a noise complaint is only worth it up to a certain point, in his eyes. An undeniable, huge win for the feisty darlings. 

Moreover, there are other hindrances when it comes to the sex, too: Mainly, his fuckass schedule. His cravings come and go like the Bullet Wyrms at the railway station, and it’s a common occurrence that he gets horny mid-job, for example. However, he has a strong standard for himself regarding the location of the deed, which is that if he’s going to do it, it’s going to happen hidden safely inside the walls of his apartment. Sure, he can understand the excitement behind tasteful exhibitionism, but, you know, he’s, like, a bit too old for that sort of thing. Plus, he doesn’t think you would really appreciate it, anyway, and so, he usually tends to cut the mission short with a less-than-plausible-sounding excuse and hold out until he can get you home. 

The same issue also makes itself known with just how whiny he can get if he’s feeling frisky but in a hurry to leave for an errand. He typically tries to test the waters instead of going the usual route of just snagging you and taking you straight to the mattress, too. He might come up behind you, press his chest against your back, and inch his fingers over your sides, around your hips, and past your navel until attempting to slip beneath your bottoms’ waistline. At that point, your response is to elbow him in the stomach as hard as you can while screaming bloody murder at him, and the result of his advances mostly ends up being a bruise on his ribs. 

Then, on the practical side of all things sexual, he runs into a problem he frankly didn’t anticipate. He perhaps should have — after all, the fact that it would come up in a hands-on way is quite obvious — but nevertheless, the issue in question is that he’s unable to finger you with his dominant hand. As unfortunate as it is, his prosthetic arm is his right, which also happens to be the more dextrous one out of the two. Though the nail in his wrist has forced him to relearn some motoric tasks with his left hand, he still writes, scrolls on his phone and jousts with the other. 

He doesn’t even think about it before the act itself. In the midst of squeezing his fingers past your thighs and finally getting to your bits, the realization of ”ah, the metal” hits his brain. Not only does the coldness probably feel uncomfortable in such a sensitive area, but the nails — the ones at the tips of his artificial fingers — are sharp-sharp. Providentially, he recognizes the issue right before he could have caused your periods to start early, and without you even necessarily noticing, he changes hands. 

The start is a little awkward. As said, he doesn’t have the same level of adroitness in his left hand, but after a while of practising the curling, thrusting and circling motions, the experience gets more pleasant for the both of you. Of course, he wishes it wasn’t a problem in the first place, as whatever he does, the nail gets in the way, and even something like holding you down can leave mean dents on your skin if he isn’t being careful enough, but in the grand scheme of things, the whole ordeal ends up being relatively minor. 

Then, aside from the functional challenges, he notices quite early on that despite having considered himself relatively well-rounded and educated, he has a lot to learn. Sure, he more or less knows what and where everything is — women have three holes down there and so on — but when he gets down to it, he realizes that the process of bringing pleasure to you isn’t as straightforward as he thought it would be. It has been quite a long time since he last got to work with the female bits up close, and it turns out that the myth about finding the clit really might have some truth to it. 

He is, however, a very fast learner. Allow him to have a quick look down there and feel around a little, and he gets the gist of it. It’s also why he tends to ask around a good amount: You’re obviously more attuned to what feels the best for you, and though he mostly has to go by your expressions, your body language, and the occasional, blatant ”ow”, it doesn’t take him that long to figure out your best spots. 

There’s not much that can gross him out sex-wise, either. Your periods, namely, are something a few yanderes would shy away from due to the potential mess and whatever else, but to him, it’s just blood, nothing more: The red doesn’t make him the least bit squeamish as it’s something that he’s regrettably very familiar with and used to. Moreover, there’s no violence involved in making it, so he doesn’t really see the issue beyond it making you uncomfortable.

On the topic, he likes to finger you whenever your time of the month strikes. He has no qualms about getting his hands a little dirty — he enjoys it, even. Sometimes, he pulls his digits out of you for a moment just to have a look at the deep red substance. Not only is it basically free lubrication, but the orgasms also help with the cramps to some degree, he has heard. The latter effect, especially, is one you can’t really find any negatives in in itself: The expired painkillers the man dug out of the cupboard don’t exactly do a good job at quelling the pain, so as much as you loathe the process via which the benefit is reaped, he can tell that the ache doesn’t bother you as much for a little while after he has pulled a climax or two out of you. Penetration is largely off-limits during your period due to him understanding that the spots can be a little tender down there during that time, but, just so you know, head really isn’t. If you didn’t react to the suggestion in the same way you would have if he made you sleep in the fridge again, he wouldn’t mind burying his face in blood one bit. 

And, finally, reaching your peak in general is something you won’t ever have to worry about due to the naturally, infuriatingly sensual quality of his touch. It’s beyond ridiculous just how much charge his fingertips carry in them, to the point where you’re certain he doesn’t really even understand it himself. 

A single, gentle brush on your skin is enough to leave the area tingling for moments on end, no matter how light the touch is. To add, the more sensitive the spot, the stronger the effect: It’s a reflexive, mild sense of beatitude that affects your entire body, and the experience alone is so intense that at one point, whenever his touches start trailing into more risqué areas, the sensation goes straight into your nethers. It’s not a conscious reaction — it just happens, and the more your system learns to associate the feeling with him, the more potent your reactions get. As usual, he’s delighted, you’re mortified. 

That, and the orgasms themselves hit like a truck. You cannot for the life of you believe him when he claims that he hasn’t really been hoeing around in the last few centu-, in some time, because the sheer skill he demonstrates in using his body for carnal means is, frankly put, absurd. For the same reason, you don’t ever really have to fear for him overstimulating you (at least too much) because it’s quite literally lights out with a single climax for you. 

A/N

Yan!Ashveil serving the average customer service horror experience. I am of the humble opinion that every single person on this planet has to experience at least one cashier, server or barista and so on shift in their lifetime. Shoutout to that one 60-year-old-ish unc at my cashier job a couple years ago who read my name off my namecard and then came back another day asking my coworkers for me and talking something about wanting to find a wife to travel the world with. Ok.

Moreover, this work ended up being one of the profiles where you have a distinct job along with Jing Yuan and Blade’s ones. I usually try to keep the background of the reader as neutral as possible, but then again, I do find that a little context to their person is nice every once in a while. And, most of you probably have had the same genre of a job at least once in your life, so the ability to relate is likely not too far off, I hope.

I am sorry, I’m feeling so fucking yappy today, so as the last thing, I thought I’d share the best/worst thing that happened to me mid-writing this thing. I was supposed to type the phrase ”rock-hard cock” into the NSFW section but I missed the middle word and just wrote ”rock-cock” and I genuinely needed to take a 15 minute break from the whole thing because I was cracking up every time my eyes landed on the block of text. Oh my god

Aaaand finally, the taglist, slayyy ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )✧

@dyingsweetmackerel @walnutofthedead @salty-pigeon @loserworld @lem-hhn @anemochiii @chocoismasochist @sivisek524 @myjawsworld @mydeilver @celestialgirl777 @universallycupcakebanana @favv-sassy @darkpurplewind @leveyani @warmandkozi @rinki-tinki @magnificentkidclamclod @donthitmeillcry @nuriicata @bugzrcute @soutar @goldandlyre @butratherbutrather

I have to say that in this situation, I would advise you not to read any more of my works for a little while, especially if you’re starting to draw parallels between the stories and the real world. That’s not to say that you’re, for the lack of a better term, fucking losing it — it’s just something that might begin happening if you got shocked by what you read, or if you were not in the right mental state while doing so, or if you’ve got something heavy going on in your own life; only you yourself can really figure the reason behind it out, if a specific one even exists in the first place. 

That being said, it’s never a bad thing to realize that something you thought you liked now gets an entirely different sort of a reaction out of you. On the contrary, I think it’s great that you’ve had the ability to think it through and realize that this kind of stuff might not be for you after all, though I obviously wish that you didn’t have to go through having to take a break from fanfic which is assumably something you’ve vastly enjoyed before.

Then again, I’d say that this sort of reflection is vital for finding out the things you’re actually into. People change, both in personality and tastes and whatnot, especially if you’re young. I’m making the presumption that you’re probably younger than the magical age of 25 where they say one’s frontal lobe has successfully developed, and I am too. I can’t even sing 22 by Taylor Swift yet, so I think that while I hope I won’t get bored of this genre, it very well might be that I’ll have entirely different interests a couple of years from now. Plus, your own experiences change what you look for, too, and those can’t exactly be foreseen too far into the future. 

Moreover, the emotions you’re going through don’t necessarily mean one thing or the other, in case it’s something you’re scared or worried about. While they can absolutely be a sign that you’d be better off never touching dark content again, they can also just be a suggestion for a little break from the genre, and you’re the only one who can really decide what the best option is. Even I myself have had moments of contemplation for a few times where I find myself wondering what the hell it is that I’m writing about, or if something like this could potentially damage my world view and so on. For instance, I sometimes find that I have to have a little time in between listening to true crime and jumping to writing, simply because of the emotional dissonance. 

I don’t know if me saying this makes you feel any better, but I’ve personally found that reading or hearing stuff point-blank might solidify the rational part of your mind and kind of calm the feelings down. In real life, I very, very much condemn all of the topics I write about because out of fiction, those are crimes, and more importantly, they’re heinous, devastating and utterly unforgivable things to do to another person. None of the things in the profiles are in any way applicable to the real world in their context, and I’ve taken zero inspiration to them from anything I’ve gone through in my life or from actual things that have happened to other people. I’ve never fantasized about any of these things happening to me in the real world; like, none of it. Furthermore, behind the screen, I’m very much a normal person just like you: I study at a university, I have a family and a lot of friends from all sorts of backgrounds, and I have a myriad of different hobbies and interests that have nothing to do with dark content. 

Lastly, the strong reaction you’re having to the topic is a sign of a solid moral compass and empathy if anything, I would argue. I’m not sure if any of these are thoughts that you might have been having, but you’re not ”weak” or ”soft” for not being able to digest this sort of stuff, and there’s overwhelmingly likely nothing wrong with you, in any direction. There’s no other reason to read dark content other than enjoying it, so if you no longer get kicks out of it, you can just leave it be and do it with a good conscience. That being said, I sincerely hope that none of you are reading my hardcore noncon smut with any other intention in mind than jerking off and/or having a blast.

By all means, if you find it a comfortable and a comforting thought, write back to me. I know there are plenty of writers who would disagree with me on this, but I personally am very ready to have these kinds of conversations with you all, and I also think that with dark content (especially of this calibre), transparency from my side is something that’s essential if we, as individuals and as a community, ever want to unravel the stigma that this sort of stuff has around it. And, these are just my two cents on the matter, so if you disagree, you're very much welcome to tell my stupid ass to shut the fuck up and go with whatever feels the best for you. You’ve got nothing to apologize for, love (っ˶ ˘ ᵕ˘)ˆᵕ ˆ˶ς)

So, Anon, take care, take a break, spend time with your thoughts and allow yourself time to figure your feelings out! I hope I could offer a little peace of mind with this answer, and if you need me, I’m right here behind the askbox, and my DMs are also open if you’d like to talk via that method. Hugs to you all, remember to look after yourselves — if not for your own sake, then for little old me (˶˘ ³˘(´͈ ᵕ `͈˶)

@gudfbi6659 asked:

“Baiii I'm here for the matchupss

I hope you won't mind

Uhh I would like a man from hsr, and I'm a pretty quiet person- unless I'm with my friends, I like to bake, read,and draw. For people I don't like the ones who are too loud I'm very sensitive to sound and I know a few ppl that I don't like but my friends befriend them so I also hv to be nice around which is really draining (srryy I kinda ranted). But I like ppl easily so I do like quiet ppl to even ppl like phainon, I will like them unless they scream every minute or is an awful person. Umm I also like holding hands, head pats and cuddles.

Hehehe as for aura farming idk if I can call that moment that but there was a pretty hard language exam that me and some of my friends did and I got a near perfect score, I'm only wrong at one question :D my friends is a little far but they passed at least!

Here's my side quest

It looks so goofy I'm srry 😭😭 I think I only got my hair right

I'm sorry if this is a bit long I hope you have a great day/night <3

-J”

One of the many good things about reading fanfic is that you learn English and language in general, although I have not mentioned that whenever I have gotten feedback on my literature skills. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ JING YUAN!

A lot of Jing Yuan matches today, but I just think it’s because a lot of you have that innate need for calmness and peace.

Loud noises aren’t going to bother you with him, he appreciates your hobbies, and he can and will offer you all the cuddles and headpats and whatnot that you might ever ask for. Moreover, he’s very skilled socially, so if you’re ever in a situation where you feel like your energy is being sucked out of you, he takes the reins without you even having to ask. Moreover, one thing he appreciates in people is the ability to get along with all sorts of people despite your opinions of them, and that’s something you have. 

He likes to bake with you, and while arts might not be his thing, he would be more than happy to nap on you while you do your thing. He can talk, or he can shut the fuck up — whatever suits your tastes better at the moment. You can be either quiet or chatty with him, he finds both very endearing. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@lenatruk asked:

“HSR.

I lean towards a noble gentleman.

I have quite a few hobbies, but the ones that definitely take center stage are collecting just about everything possible, singing, translating yandere fanfiction, and hitting the gym. Oh, and of course, I love doing makeup! As for what I heavily dislike: the color brown, cleaning, and very dry food that was clearly meant to be juicy.

I finally fully embraced and channeled my obsession with yandere guys into something creative—I started doing translations and launched my very own blog. I feel incredibly proud of this!”

Girl babygirl honey I tried so hard not to let the bias show but like who would be a better match for you, seriously. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ AVENTURINE!

The only hint of brown I found on him is on his vest, I hope you’ll forgive him that much. 

I think the values you hold are somewhat similar: You’re the glam type of a girl, you take care of your aesthetics, and so does he. Moreover, I know for a fact that bro does not like to clean nor does he accept dry food. It’s small things like that that you can bond over. Plus, whenever you go anywhere, you can be damn sure that you’re going to be the most dazzling couple there. I can already imagine the matching clothes. 

You can also be the soothing factor in his life despite your excitement. It’s about the kind of grounding energy you have, and when he’s with you he can just focus on existing rather than having to take care of any funny IPC matters. If you would like to chat his ear off about anything, whether that be about fanfics or something else entirely, he’s going to smile and nod and smile and nod for however long he gets to listen to it. Moreover, I think he would probably specifically ask you to sing whenever he’s feeling a little stressed.

How blursed would it be to be a yandere fanfic writer or enjoyer while having a yandere yourself. I can’t decide if he’d be mad or amused. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@sinorafan1 asked:

“HSR

Most of all I would probably like to see a noble gentleman!

My hobbies are editing, knitting, and drawing. I'm not very good at drawing, but whatever! I knit a lot of different things, such as scarves, sweaters, bags, and mittens. I've been editing since I was 21, back during Gacha Life. Now I'm making various videos about Hoyo games.

I had a big aura in my 20s, when I had a huge group of friends, and we walked everywhere possible and impossible. We were allowed to walk around until almost 2 am! We often liked to play hide and seek at night or ring the bell and run away. One night we got a slap on the wrist from some granny for this! And also from that company there is a guy that I have liked for 6 years now, but it’s just a secret😺😺”

BABE GO CONFESS TO THE GUY AND UPDATE ME ON WHAT HAPPENED.

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ GALLAGHER!

Okay, listen, this is a bit of an arbitrary decision, but when I saw the picture, I immediately thought of Gallagher. Moreover, if I’m reading into you right, you’re someone who might appreciate a man a little more on the mature side even though he’s 13.

I think he appreciates the playfulness in you, above all. He himself is only a serious person when he needs to be, and other than that, he’s very laid-back. The big daddy energy is very palpable at the start, but the more time you spend with him, the more you realize just how soft of a guy he is. He’s your scary man privilege whenever you go out to farm more aura — nobody is stupid enough to try to come at you with him looming behind you. 

Moreover, the fact that he doesn’t have to fear for you to get hurt in any of your hobbies is something that brings stability to his days since his own profession is a relatively dangerous one. And, he would totally ask you to knit something for him, no matter how much it clashes with his own aesthetic. Like, knit him a wool tie or something — he’ll wear it with pride. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@madseacucumber asked:

“Hi Riri! 😊

First of all, I'm so happy to hear that you've been delighting us for a whole year already! Your blog is really something special to me. I love your writing so much! And I also like reading about how your days are going. Wishing you endless inspiration and all the best! 🌹

​I was really inspired by your match-up idea, so here are my answers:

HSR

A gentleman

My life right now is all about getting settled in a foreign country (I'm sooo far away from home now) and keeping up with my studies. I'm not a very social person, but I'm living my best life riding my bicycle alone and exploring the surroundings (it's insane how beautiful it is here!). I'm a MELOMANIAC, I listen to literally everything, but my favorites right now are black metal (it's my essence), dungeon synth (to imagine myself in a fantasy world), and phonk (to imagine myself as a super-duper cool girl). I also sing well!

And what I really despise are disingenuous people and unwelcome advice on HOW I need to live MY life.

​I sang Radiohead's Creep in a bar once. Everyone was singing along with me, it was sooo cool! My hour of glory 🥹 I hope it was only the beginning and someday I will sing in my own band!”

Oh honey, that’s so nice of you to say 🥹🥹 I’ll do my best to entertain you in the future, too. I’m also very flattered to hear that at least someone is interested in the shit I pull in my freetime, the Ririlore pieces shall keep coming. 

A fellow singer, a fellow singer, a kindred spirit. I am firmly of the opinion that singing is a holy thing, no matter if you’re good at it or not. It’s heartbreaking to me whenever people say that “No I can’t sing I’m bad at it” as if music isn’t one of the very few languages that unite us regardless of the culture. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ MYDEI!

Have you seen the (I think) official guitarist art of him? That’s what I’m basing this on. Do you see my vision?

He himself is a very from-0-to-a-100 sort of a person, and it’s the introvertedness in you that complements that very well. It doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re calm (or god forbid, boring), it just means that whenever he’s with you, he doesn’t have to be all gruff and hyperaware of everything that’s going on — he can just focus on walking around and doing whatnot with you. The fact that you’ve taken the leap of faith and moved to another country is a sign of courage and open-mindedness, which is a trait that he undoubtedly goes crazy for in a partner. As his partner, you get the privilege of being one of the few people that can fluster him. 

You’ve also got a bit of stubbornness going on, and I think it’s something that pretty much makes him fold. He’s someone who appreciates candidness over everything, so you being true to yourself and your values is something he admires vastly. He challenges you in all the best ways, and you do the same for him. 

In a modern AU, he would play the guitar and have you sing along to it. Mic drop. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@soutar asked:

“Hello!!! So happy to celebrate one year with you queen 🎊🎊🥳🥳 I know that your decision to make this blog made a lot of people's lives better, at least mine sure did!!! 🎊🎊

Let's get GOINGGGGG (I'm so scared Riri hold my hand wahh)

1. For me it's no difference from what you pick since I trust you so if you decide a character from genshin fits me better feel free to use it instead 😚😚 Buttt if I had to choose I'm choosing HSR because I kind of associate it with you! (And the characters are yummyyy)

2. One male for me please 🥸☝️

3.  I would say that I'm a pretty curious person, put me on any kind of documentary with David Attenborough and I'm SAT (or any kind of documentary really, especially nature ones), or a good book about a topic I don't know a lot about. I love learning but an important thing about me is that I'm an ADHD user so sometimes my brain does not have the patience! My ADHD also makes me more impulsive (especially buying stuff) and enhances my already emotional personality.... Plus sometimes I jump on walls and space out often but I think that's to be expected!

I'm someone who prefers to always have a backup option buttt I enjoy certain spontaneous things like random trips, meetups ect. Uh eh I really enjoy playing games and I'm a heavy lore player no matter what game I pick up I guess... And I hope I'll get to study psychology soon!

I HATE loud and/or sudden noises 😞 and I most definitely was the weird kid in elementary school. And I'm ticklish. That's all I think not telling anymore because I have to remain very mysterious and nonchalant 🤓

4. Being on debates and making counterpoints to all arguments the other teams tried to make against our team on the part when I was speaking 🤓🤓 And we convinced all the people in the room but one on our side 😋😋

5. For privacy reasons you get a fantastic 'me' blorbo that's staring menacingly (not going down without a fight 🫯) at whatever character you'll choose! (Uhh feel free to shrink me a bit if I made myself take up too much space lmao)”

I’m holding your hand baby don’t worry. Gently guiding you to your match. I love how you say you’re an ADHD user the same way someone would tell me they use Linux. CONGRATULATIONS ON THE FINALS I KNEW YOU HAD IT IN YOU RRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ PHAINON!

You’re the first person to get the ever-desired Phainon, this is a good start for the rest. 

He needs a partner that can respond to him emotionally, you can’t get anywhere from that. The guy has so much love to give but so many difficult feelings to work through, and you being a sensitive person opens that possibility. He’s also great at feeling in general, and you seem to be the sort that appreciates that vastly. 

When it comes to the planning vs spontaneous stuff, he’s the exact same! Bro likes to go with the flow and occasionally do stupid shit, but at the same time, he likes to always have a plan B in case anything goes horribly wrong. 

The tickling thing might have to be compromised because you can be certain that he’s going to take advantage of it and poke you in the side when you least expect it, but I think it’s just part of the charm. He also has the unfortunate quality about his touch that he unintentionally ends up tickling you when he doesn’t mean to: Like, when he pickles you up from behind, you start squirming, and only then does he realize that oh yea that probably tickles. And, you just know that when it comes to loud noises, he’s the sort of a boyfriend who knows to come cover your ears. 

Most importantly, you sort of match the chaos with him. He, too, will start climbing up the walls when left unattended for too long, but you also have the sort of hobbies that could allow him to sit down for a bit and just kind of laze around with you. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@m0irene asked:

“Happy anniversary to your blog dear Riri!!! Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart for sharing your written works with us, fellow hsr fanfic readers. Your writing never failed to amaze me because of how many words you typed in. Every time you upload new fics it's like woah new 5 star buffet let's dig in!

I actually wanna be emoji anon as I usually do in the ask but since you prefer it to be off anon, then why not? I should reveal myself...♪⁠ヽ⁠(⁠･⁠ˇ⁠∀⁠ˇ⁠･⁠ゞ⁠) Oh well perhaps some clues would be enough..(it's very obvious don't worry lol) first time using this account properly kinda nervous

Dededeng let's begin,

1. I love hsr men🤤🤤🤤

2. I would prefer gentleman thank you very much

3. Something I like... Hmm.. I love listening to vocaloid songs and utaite covers! One of my personal favorite would be a song called Lost One Weeping and utaites named Mafumafu and Eve. I usually play hsr or twst to fill up my spare time but I occasionally draw or make edits on alight motion if the motivation suddenly spiked. Other than that, I'm about to pursue further college studies in science field (I going to be a veterinarian!) I love animals especially cats heheh. Also, I'm very shy(or scared? Idk but they are scary..) towards men(except my father) so I don't really interact and talk with them unless it's necessary for work and assignment purposes. Idk bro they're just a whole different species.

4. I used to share one room with 3 roommates. So the story is we were minding our own business but then one of them suddenly screamed so I looked at her and saw TWO HUGE COCKROACH is running around on the floor. All of them freaked out and jumped on the bed yada yada whole house mad and of course, the savior, the one and only, ME! came to save the day. I fear no cockroach as I take some tissues to grab those little devils and toss them in a trash can. Thus I have returned the peace for my fellow subjects. And they all live happily ever after.

5. Last but not least,

I hope I'm not late for this matchmaking by Miss Riri the Matchmaker, but if I am then it's alright if you ignore this ask!^^”

Time and time again I try to keep the works a little shorter because a 30k word fic is basically a nuclear bomb both to the readers and my ever-crashing Google Chrome, but I’ve found that I am physically unable to adhere to the limits. Very glad to hear you that I’ve managed to keep you around, I hope to see you on my blog in the future too (*ᵕᴗᵕ)⁾⁾ Tactically placed tutel

I also listen to vocaloid every now and then, I originally fell in love with Deco 27’s older work, and then I got into Utsu-P. I used to be a fan of Wowaka’s and still am, he had such an unique view of music. I’m gonna be honest I would die if I had to live in a place where I know there are cockroaches. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ BLADE!

I’m so serious I didn’t even realize it’s Blade in your profile picture before I went to try and stalk your possible pronouns. 

Sounds like you need a calmer guy that makes sure you don’t ever need to talk to other men ever again if you don’t feel like it. 

It’s after you get over the initial fear of even being near him that you two can hit it off properly. He’s very well aware of the fact that his aura is menacing enough to drain an entire room of happiness, but it’s precisely where you come in. You’ve got a softer energy to you, and it ends up getting him to mellow out a bit. The initial courting part is going to be an entire nightmare for you because he does not, for the life of him, have the ability to rizz anyone up in his current state, but you’re one he’s willing to get over that wall for. 

He’s basically your scary dog privilege: You don’t ever have to fear for anyone overstepping your boundaries when there’s a guy looking like an omen of death lingering right behind you. Moreover, he appreciates the fact that you appear to be a person of action, too, if the cockroach story is anything to go by: He knows you can take care of yourself, but he’s there to protect you if need be. 

I also think that he’s someone who can appreciate both art and science, and you have both of those going on. He has a soft spot for animals (and I am willing to die on this hill), so if you were to want a cat, he certainly wouldn’t be opposed even if the answer that comes out of his mouth is one-word. 

Lastly, since you’re a gamer, you’ll probably get along great with Silver Wolf, which is always a plus. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@salty-pigeon asked:

“hsr unless you think there's a better match in genshin!

preference for gentleman (〃∀〃)ゞ

(sorry this is quite long ╥﹏╥) im like a workaholic when it comes to my studies. 8am to 10pm at the college everyday just studying, and then coming home to do my dailies and sleep :') i usually go in on the weekends too so it's literally 7 days a week studying ijbol. i tend to keep to myself due to severe social anxiety :V i dont really have a desire for socialization and friends but on the flip side, i feel extremely strongly about a romantic partner. it's kind of like an all or nothing scale lol. i really dislike popular or conventional things, or better put, npcs. like i hate male characters with the gepard haircut for example cuz omg everybody and theys mamas look like that bro... i prefer people out of the norm like a male character who doesn't adhere to the typical masculine standards (tall, strong, muscular, short hair, etc.). i had no clue why i was like this until my friend said i was a contrarian and suddenly it all made sense... umm i also really REALLY dislike religion. i wont get into it too much but i myself am an atheist and i think i just have difficulties understanding things that stem from tradition rather than logic. idk where to fit this in but when it comes to brain vs brawn i will always choose brain. i even find brawn unattractive and i love characters who potentially aren't that strong but are good with their minds. actually i would say the thing that irritates me most in characters or even people in general is stupidity while intelligence is what i find most attractive. oh ya also i love animals. i believe all animals deserve sunshine /ref. my favourite are pigeons and i hope to get a pet pigeon or ringneck dove someday! to me, every animal is simply trying to survive and the least we could do is treat them with basic respect (°◡°♡)

the only moment i can think of was checking my grades after finals and seeing i passed all of my courses with an A+ this semester (〃▽〃). for reference, i was taking ochem, biostats, biochem, and physics. while ive maintained straight A's through college this is the first time i've ever gotten full A+'s for a semester (´∀｀)

ijbol it was so hard to draw with a mouse but here you go”

Geppie catching mad strays. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ ANAXA!

Yeah girl I can see why you would like him. I was thinking of Ratio, too, naturally, but I thought that the menace’s aethetics might match better. 

Well, first off, he’s nothing if not the intellectuality and pure logic that you yearn for in a partner, and he’s certainly also an all-or-nothing sort of a guy. He likes all things unusual and is willing to argue with anyone who thinks that mere intuition is enough to base one’s opinion on. I think he’ll appreciate those views on you, too. 

He’s the sort of a man that doesn’t necessarily need social contact to keep him up (or so he claims) — spending time with you is more than enough and much more stimulating than whatever some bloke on the street could offer him. Overworking is a bad habit of his, just like it is for you, but as I said in a previous match-up, I think the case here would be that both of you discourage each other from it while actively doing it yourself. It’s you two against the world. 

Also, the animal thing is very much up his alley, too. He’s very fond of dromases, and you can be very fond of pigeons. Match made in heaven a lab. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

(⭐name) Kuras

“1. HSR

2. Gentleman, of course :3

3. I keep myself busy with many sorts of things and try to focus on what I enjoy. I write stories, work on improving quality of life, and love a steady routine; I love peace and quiet, and I look after my pets day and night. I do dynamic stretching and turn every lunch break into a pleasant way to pass the time. What I don’t like and try to avoid in advance: excessive chaos in my schedule, when everything goes haywire; and also when someone tries to control me or my time – that’s when the music from DOOM kicks in straight away.

4. I’ve had plenty of highlights I’m proud of) But I’ll single out one. In eight days, I wrote a story—or rather, a book—and submitted it to a publishing competition. And the book made it onto the shortlist—the final step before the very last stage, where there’s just one winner. My heart tells me, that the story was so close to the victory, but to make it onto the shortlist like that is really cool.”

Hello, hi, hello, I’ve heard so much about you from a certain someone! *doom soundtrack plays*

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ PRE-AE SUNDAY!

The thing that stood out to me first in this ask is the fact that you’re very organized and relatively confident about yourself — both qualities that someone like the Oak Family Sunny would vastly appreciate. Routines, especially, are something that you’re going to have to have with him as he’s going to explode otherwise. 

You also have distinct goals that you’re working for, and dedication is a thing he really admires in you. It’s something that makes him want to be better at his job, too (we’re just gonna ignore the implications). Moreover, the peace and quiet you talk about allows him to rewind in between his all too packed of a schedule, and vice versa. Like, just sitting next to you and idly fiddling with your hair while you write heals his soul bit by bit. 

Consider: I’m so sure he’s very much into reading, so whatever it is that you come up with, he’s going to read. Like, imagine whipping a story up and showing it to him, and he reads it through in a single sitting before nodding with a thoughtful look on his face and giving you some well-worded praises on it. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@ghosts-n-aliens asked:

“Matchups?? I haven't heard that term in years...

I hope I'm not too late sending in this ask!!

I'd like a gentleman of the Honkai Star Rail variety!!

I'm a languages and literatures student (I study English and Japanese lmao) and would like to be a university professor one day. I'm very talkative once you get me talking about my interests (like videogames - I'm very into Pokemon, internet horror, music, literature etc.). I perceive myself as being very awkward even though I am the type of person to chat up a storm with an Uber driver lmao. I'm also very affectionate and touchy, and am all over my friends!! I am very loyal but very stubborn, and if you do me wrong one too many times i can hold a mean grudge. This last part is in contrast with the fact that I am quite sensitive and will cry easily. I am very protective over people that I love and funnily enough my grudges are more linked to people that did my friends wrong rather than me. Being driven, especially academically, is a big part of who I am; used to be really shy/passive in highschool and now at every single university event I'm there either participating or organizing. In my free time i either game, draw, write or nap, ooor you can find me at my friends' places, dying someone's hair or gossiping with their mom.

When it comes to romantic interactions, however, I am kinda oblivious (when someone likes me especially) and I've never been in a relationship.

Also, one of the most important things: I absolutely adore trinkets!! My room is full of them and you will hear me jingle-jangle-ing down the hall.

FUUUCK aura farming moments?? I can't recall any of true note off the top of my head?? At least idk if they're that aura farm-y?? If I had to pick one tho, it would probably acting in my friend's play on stage in front of a pretty decent crowd (that also had a couple of my professors lmao), and was told by somebody that I kinda carried the play!! :3

I APOLOGIZE IN ADVANCE FOR YAPPING TOO MUCH!!! (And forgive any typos, I wrote this in a rush!!)

I will attempt to attach a doodle!!”

Ah, an everything-doer in flesh and blood. I’m also guilty of jingle-jangleing, my keys are attached to my phone so I don’t lose them, but they also have a billion trinkets on them.

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ PHAINON!

It’s your sheer willpower to do so many things at the same time that sold me on this one. Listen, he’s a bit of a hurricane, he’s good with emotions, but he’s also academically oriented. Bro studied under Anaxa of all people. 

He’s mad attracted to the cheerfulness and chattiness in you. He’s well aware of the fact that he can be quite a lot, but when he finds someone that can match that energy, there’s hardly anything he wouldn’t do in order to preserve that connection. He, like you, is very protective over the ones he holds dear, and such a quality strengthens the bond between you two as you have each other’s backs in that way. Plus, your stubbornness is a quality that keeps him on his toes; he likes to be challenged in that way every once in a while. 

Then, I think he would get up to all kinds of silly stuff with you — whatever it is that you have in mind. Additionally, he is also very much the touchy kind, so you won’t be getting his hands off of you when he gets down to it. Cuddling, hand-holding, play-fighting and so on are all daily occurrences, and the fact that you respond to him with the same sort of affection could make him burst. 

Lmao and since you’re the oblivious sort, the courting part of it will look like the two of you are already dating but only one of you is aware of the fact.

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@magnificentkidclamclod asked:

“1. Honkai Star Rail

2. A gentleman, pretty pretty please.

3. I'd consider myself a relatively normal person, I'm incredibly average looking and I honestly don't have the best self esteem appearance wise. I'm currently a full time college student just majoring in English without any real goal in life yet. And I struggle with anxiety enough to be medicated for it. 😅 However when it comes to my hobbies and stuff I like for fun, oh baby I got a lot! I'm a very creative mind, I like to draw, write, paint, and roleplay. I'm constantly online talking to my friends over calls whenever I game since I'm a big home-body with many friends out of my state/country. I like knowing when things are gonna happen since I am admittedly on the spectrum, so scheduling and planning ahead on any detail for anything is a must for me.

I guess my biggest dislike? Birth. I watched the Alien (1979) once and ever since I've grown a huge phobia against anything related to childbirth or just the idea of raising a kid entirely.. I also have Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS) so frankly it's out of my hands either way lol.

4. This might be the lamest flex??? But idk! My friends and I do these long term murder mystery roleplays on Discord that we host for each other when we can, and in the first chapter of the last one I was in hadn't actually gotten someone to be the murderer yet so my friend (who was hosting) came to me for help since the trial was going to happen in 4 days.

SO! I PROCEEDED TO WRITE

THE EVIDENCE

THE BODY DESCRIPTION

TESTIMONIES

TIME STAMPS

THE WHOLE SERIES OF EVENTS OF THE CASE

AND AN EXECUTION

WITHIN 2 DAYS

IN WHICH THE TRIAL LANDED ON MY BIRTHDAY!

…I was so happy when everyone loved it, and had no idea I had only two days to make it.. It's frankly the biggest writing flex I've ever achieved, and even today I question how the hell did it.

thats me up there ^^ and also, you look hot today ✨️”

You were very correct about the hotness two days ago. However, the previous ask indicating the same thing was, unfortunately, the farthest possible thing for the truth as I was, in fact, on the first day of my period and looking like I had lived two weeks past my expiration date. 

Moreover, regarding your self-esteem with your appearance, try to remember that beauty truly is in the eye of the beholder: Someone whom you find to be the most attractive person ever could be another person’s worst aesthetic nightmare, and vice versa. I have moments where I wonder if I’m pretty, cute, hot enough and so on too, but the fact I think all of us should keep in mind that first and foremost, practically all of us look neutral. If you saw yourself walkign down the street, I bet the entire contents of my fridge that you wouldn’t think of yourself as ugly — it truly is all in your head. 

I heard they recently renamed PCOS to PMOS because of the medical inaccuracy in the name. It’s kind of crazy to think that it took this much time to correct a blatantly wrong name. Women’s healthcare 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ LUOCHA!

Listen, he strikes me as someone with a creative mind (albeit there isn’t all that much to know about him yet, canonically speaking). I would assume your tastes in a partner lean towards a person who could match the artistic energy to at least some degree, and he’s more than well-suited for the job. 

Furthermore, when it comes to routines and plans, he likes to stick to those as well. Since he knows they’re a very dear thing to you, he makes sure not to have anything unpredictable coming if he can help it. Additionally, he has a very anxiety-reducing presence, so with him, you’ll never have to feel on-edge — bro is just that guy. 

I’d like to say that he’s the sort of a person who can effortlessly make others bloom in their own skin, if you know what I mean. It’s like your self-esteem issues just kind of slowly fade with him without you even noticing. It’s very subtle things that he uses to make you feel loved — little touches, well-placed words, and maybe one of the flowers he spawns put in your hair when you least expect it. 

I also think that he’d enjoy the murder mystery stuff. He has that mysterious, nonchalant king aura to him, so spending time with you by trying to solve whatever case you’ve come up with could just be his ideal plan for the evening. He might just beat you in your own game. 

And, like, he won’t make you give birth. Important disclaimer. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

“hello riri!!! it is i, sushi anon 🍣🍣!! I hope it's okay that Im doing this on anon.. Im a little paranoid about digital footprint IM SORRY!!!

Im a big fan of all of your work and wanted to do your match ups!! (HSR, lady or man, whoever is best for me all knowing riricatria..)

I work at a library as a clerk, and my favorite part is definitely organizing charity drives and fun events for families. Whenever we have events for kids I use that colorful hair chalk stuff to put streaks in. They always lose their minds over it, it's so cute. I'd love to dye my hair someday but unfortunately for me I'd rather have as little attention on me as possible. Maybe someday if Im more confident.

I live in a relatively small space, but I highkey pace like a lot a lot and I can't function in a space with no room to pace. I also love to garden and I love to collect rocks and crystals! I also love love love to garden. I handle the flowers outside of the library I work at, and ai have a garden outside of my home that I tend to. I grow all sorts of things. A yandere that lets me interact with red azaleas in any way would be most preferable.. I don't care how it happens, just let me see them. Botanical gardens, their own garden, trespassing, by any means. They are my most favorite flower and I grow so many.

When I took your darling quiz I got timid, which definitely sounds right. I fair pretty well with stress and most of the questions I was just thinking.. I'd prefer to minimize any interaction with my captor. When I think about the day to day life of being a darling, I think the hardest (mundane) part would be just.. loosing the autonomy over my activities. Like yeah sure you can get me books, but I'll miss browsing.. Stuff like that. Although, again, I think I could force myself to get over it. Or at least do my best to never express my discontent.

My most auraful moment was probably when I invited friends to go bird watching and I was able to name anything we saw.. A small win but Im proud of it nonetheless, my life is not particularly eventful.

And I would send a doodle of me but Anons aren't allowed to attach images. 😓😓”

It’s all quite alright, Sushi, you can share just as much or just as little info with me as you want. And, absolutely dye your hair if you feel like it, I’m channeling huge confidence to you!! Tell me which colour you settled on. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ CASTORICE!

Mm, it’s the flowers that sealed the deal here, plus the timid darling factor. 

Libraries, flowers, animals, a sort of a calm appreciation towards the environment, plus the general aura analysis are things that I would argue could guide you towards Cassie. She’s someone who would have quite a ride trying to handle the more energetic and brazen people, but you fit her idea of a partner to a T. He cherishes all the same sorts of things that you do (even though everything living she touches dies), and I think it’s what ends up urging her closer to you. 

This probably starts as a friendship. She takes her sweet time getting to know you, and you do the same. You go on like half-dates together: Taking walks among the many gardens of Amphoreus, going birdwatching, finding the most creative ways for her to be able to touch you so that you can be closer to each other, and so on. 

I also think that she’d be particularly fond of the fact that you do gardening. She herself really can’t, for obvious reasons, so watching you do it is the second best thing she could ask for. 

Now, if we hit the yandere button here, I think the same things apply but the friendship ends up with you locked in her house with a bag of azalea seeds ready on the window sill. She made sure not to touch them, of course, she’s going to try her very best to make you happy with what little she can offer!

She also has the crystal girl sort of a vibe, surely. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@sirenshymns asked:

“1. Which fandom (Genshin or HSR)?

would you kill me if i said i wouldn't mind either, but my preference is hsr

2. Would you like a lady or a gentleman or will either do?

either... 👀👀👀 i still kinda have a pref for men tho? IDK

3. What do you like to do, what sort of a person are you? This is a free-form: You can tell me about your hobbies, about your studies, your work, what you're fond of, what you heavily dislike, how you like to live your life, what you ate for breakfast today, that sort of thing. Whatever you're comfortable revealing to me and to the others that might be reading it along with the answer!

as of writing this i'm so sorry but it is like 2 ish hrs before the deadline for me because i did not know this match up existed until now cuz i visited ur blog FORGIVE ME RIRI 🙏 i have been a quiet fan until now and ALSO it's my birthday the day after the deadline (may 19th) so huzzah

i don't really know what to say about myself so i'll just ramble here, i love to read and write on the occasion and i love roleplaying.... it's very fun and i love making characters or reading stuff about psychology and then imagining like the hypotheticals and what if scenarios in a characters life, like imagine if malleus draconia had actually played in a dnd campaign 🤔🤔 what if he still had that centaur form... do you think he would win against chimera grim post ch7?

i'm really fond of those types of mapping scenarios and it brought me into being interested in like dark romance? psychological thrillers? shit bruh idk but i also do like to draw on my down time, i live a chud life unfortunately because i spend a lot of my time online when i'm not doing academic work because the internet is my life, i have been exposed to it since i was like 4 years old my dude and so consequently i'm really attuned to the internet linguistics to a degree and sometimes the trends and lowkirkuinely... the brainrot

what do i dislike? i dislike a lot of things i think but they are hard to come up in my head, i really dislike people who are effortlessly Good at something even though i also want to do that and it grinds my gears to see someone put in less effort but succeed easier than me, i HATE seafood and i can tolerate salmon because of my experience when i was younger i choked on a fish bone and not only that it was kinda spicy, i'm not the biggest fan of country music but i may listen to it occasionally if it's ironic like four big guys.. iykyk. But like, don't really search that up unless you're ready to hear some bullshit seriously

i'm honestly a really big lurker and an observer in daily life when i'm not connected to a screen, but i have been trying to get better at it recently (socializing with my friends, reaching out outside of school, making small talk, etc) and also lock in on my academics cuz this year was a wake up call for me to start studying more .. still in that hermit chud life still

on my own character ... i'm not really sure how to define it, i like to please other people and sometimes i will bend my back for them but my patience is Low and i'm really irritable if buttons are pressed long enough that i will genuinely flow a fuse and throw crazy attitude, despite this i'm known to be kinda nice? honest? and kinda of crazy because i can say some raunchy stuff like what i wanna do to a char like i wanna clean the sweat off of phainons back with my Ton- WHO SAID THAT, i'm also a bit??? tunnel visioned tbh and a bit oblivious because of that my parents have said because i could be perceptive and really into the details even the niche ones that authors would dream of being pointed out but then miss the most obvious thing ever, even then tho i'm still kind of independent in a way cuz i'm not bothering people too much and i bottle things up until i explode, which could be a slowburn or explosive road rage (why are people on the road so fucking dumb its actually absurd, the driver tests need to be harder bro. Also toll roads are STUPID)

oh yeah also i'm kinda like. A metaslave for hsr but i don't do 0 cycles but i want to clear endgames if that makes sense like AA for that yummy self model resin and then the jades to collect chars like pokemon... i have spent quite a bit of money i am shamed to say the total and i do not wanna know #tbh but my luck was really good when i returned back to hsr on 3.4 of phainons banner he loved me fr..

my flex arena.. anaxa (would u believe me if i said during his rerun in 3.6 he came to me in three tenpulls back to back and i almost screamed during a lecture), phainon, robin, and sw999 are e2s1 while cyrene is e2s0 but e2 was such a good investment anyway, my e1s are trib, dhpt (e1s1 actually), and ruanmei but i'm planning some more e1s or e2s. Staring at dhpt. We want e2s1 cuz hes the GOATTTTT my e0s1 are evey, cassie, sunday, hyacine

i have a little collection of teams

dot: hysi, kafka, bs, dhpt

hypercarry, phainon and anaxa who dual it out for their supports: phainon/anaxa, cyrene/sunday, cerydra/rmc, dhpt/hyacine

elation: sw999, sparxie, emc/sparkle, dhpt/luocha (if dhpt is taken elsewhere cuz the elation shill.. luocha oh how you need a novaflare so bad)

rem: evernight, cyrene, hyacine, rmc/cas/trib

and then kinda thats it, i have a few stragglers in my roster rotting sometimes like jingyuan acheron boothill and cipher but one day. I want to build a team for break boothill ugh. jingyuan idk and acheron Idk either and cipher.. Shes funny cat lady i love her eng voiceacting

this is a whole yappinator i shalln't bore you too much and now end it here, thank you for your time 🙏 oh yeah also, last time i did a personal match up, i had gotten kaveh which i still have saved in my album

4. Describe the moment you farmed the most aura in the past year. Like flex on me the hardest you possibly can

unfortunately the only auraful moment was me winning three awards in a state team competition, we ended up in 3rd place so we didnt go to nationals and the competitions we were in are like pair ups but i would say i contributed a great bit, it was a trivia stem thing

as for 5. this is my drawing, i hope it's not too intimidating it took me like 12 mins to do cuz i wanted to do a sitting pose or sum. For aura Ok, i'm sure the person i'm matched up with will be so normal, right.. this is fine

thank you for your time and reading this and doing this we love riri happy one year anniversary! your writing has stood out to me for so long with the neat explorations of hsr characters... my fav profile is phainons lowk. Which is crazy to probably say but i'm a phainon girlie

Happy birthday, baby!! I have to say, I vastly enjoyed reading this ask because of the sheer energy that jumped in my face. Thank you for sending this in. I’m waiting for King Yuan Novaflare like my exam results. I had to take the pics in your ask out because of the ever-looming images per post limit, I apologize.

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ SAMPO!

Now, I know my man Shampoo will be either a big hit or a big fucking miss, but hear me out

He’s got basically all that you have going on on the crazier side. Psychological thrillers? Check, his whole fucking life is a psychological thriller. Brainrot? Obviously, palpably. Low patience? Bro he would be in the car in the traffic with you and ask you if he has the permission to drive the person ahead into a ditch. 

But, where I think you come in, is kind of managing to calm him down. Like, you’re rational, too, and clearly at least somewhat responsible with how you’re currently handling life, and he needs that in his. You’re going to be the magical force that tells him to quit whatever shenanigans he’s getting up to. Although, with him, you can be sure that each and every shenanigan committed would be for you <3

Still, on his side of the equation, he gets you to get out of your shell more. If you’re prone to spending unholy amounts of time inside four walls, he’s going to be the one to drag you out to touch grass and socialize with people, whether that be the normal way or in the Sampo way. If it’s the thrill that you’re after he can and he will take you to the World’s End Tavern to see what that life is all about. 

The start for this love story is probably you going to take the trash out and finding him hiding in the trashcan. How lovely. And, you just know he would get up to play gacha with you and probably scam people out of gems just because. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@fleeting-starrymush asked:

“Hello miss riri!

Ive been a silent lurker for a while… but happy 1yr anniversary!!! I just wanted to say I love reading your works :) It’s genuinely so horrific <— SAID WITH ALL THE LOVE AND AWE IN THE WORLD!!! Reading your works makes me feel a sense of foreboding and dread… it’s so amazing <3 and not to mention your art!!! how does it feel to be the most coolest and amazing person ever? <3

I’d love to join your match-up game :)

HSR

Either will do!

Though I am… thee #1 girl failure!! Beauty of everyday life sustains me… I love the sky, trees, and sunlight… all the creatures in the world and many other things… I feel like all will be alright when I see such things. I’ve lived in many different places and seeing different sceneries and ways of life warms my heart. I love reading and drawing <3 I’m studying ux design but it’s mostly for money and it’s creative enough to (hopefully) satisfy my heart. I just like making things with my hands and hope to learn many new skills to aid my journey… In a ideal world… I'd have a home by the sea where I own things that I absolutely adore and I get to travel more, experience and learn things, and create more. Unfortunately, I am a meal skipper… I open the fridge, stare, and close it. I will always be fond of the arts and things people make, the ocean, and clothing —> a cute outfit gives me strength to face the day!! I don’t like fake people... they scare me…. I operate on 1 braincell and it’s focused on keeping me alive… also hate pickles……. 

My friend…. I have negative aura. Im losing aura. I am aura less. Most I can say, is that I left my home and went on an adventure taking myself where my heart fancies………..

Typing this out… I think I have an inkling on who you’ll sign me too… but we’ll see :)

It’s so funny… I did your “type of darling” quiz I really thought I’d get sensitive or timid darling! and surprise! I got feisty darling… my primary state is peaceful but push too far and you’re catching these hands even if I lose.

I also did the hsr yandere test…. I won’t lie… I was aiming for AE Sunday. But I ended up getting Argenti then I took it again and got Phainon… its a bit silly but im an infp and those two are enfj which apparently is the golden pair…

Once again, happy 1 year anniversary!! I hope this event is super fun for you and that this spring is kind to you <<<<33333”

FEISTY DARLING FEISTY DARLING ONE OF US ONE OF US

Why thank you for the compliment! I always think it’s especially endearing to have someone say that “your writing is so terrifying” before promptly correcting themselves in case I would get the wrong idea, I love you all. Girl you need to stop with the flattery I am actually going to explode

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ CYRENE!

You are SO CUTE with your optimism and appreciative look on life, I love that for you. You know who else has the exact same view on the world? Our beautiful bride princess Cyrene. We will now proceed to ignore the current state of the Amphoreus affairs in favour of painting this picture.

She falls in love with all the positivity you have in you. She’s an avid enjoyer of everything the world has to offer, and she has the ability to find beauty in everything, just like you. I think sunshine attracts sunshine here: It’s just an endless loop that keeps sustaining itself, and she wouldn’t have it any other way.

She’s also very romantic, as I would assume you are, too. Little things here and there, loving words, hugs, kithhhes, and oh my god if she wouldn’t be into fashion if HSR characters were ever allowed to change clothes. Modern AU is calling. Moreover, if it’s anything creative you’re into, she would get so excited to try it with you! Like, everything from pottery to painting to music to whatever you could come up with. I think she would encourage you to get into all sorts of new things. 

Oh, and this might be an unpopular opinion but I am very much of the opinion that she has a little bit of a scatterbrain inside of her, she just hides it very well. If she was a darling, she would be a feisty darling, just like you. 

Also, girl, the ocean -> Aedes Elysiae. Need I say more. Of course, this will be a romantic match-up like none that has come before. You think so too, right? 

Ok ok how did I do, did I guess correctly

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@merlanch0lix asked:

“for matchups! congrats on one year!!! 🎉

1. hsr

2. male please!

3. oh man. so hello ! i’m merlanch0lix and i have adhd that makes me both master of doing 5 things at once and also lying in bed staring at the ceiling for an hour. i have too many interests— alternative & j-fashion, makeup, cosplay, baseball, art, gaming, but most of my personality comes from being into heavy music and going to punk shows lol. im a little guy with a lot of anger and a temper that i must suppress because i work in customer service (iykyk) but thankfully i have a very patient partner that bounces off of me. i spend most of my free days eating my way through the city, crashing out over what i’m going to wear that day because i have too many clothes, and then going out to buy more clothes. an art major dropout because school was NOT for me 💔. i am very spontaneous and need to always have something to do. loud and not afraid to speak my mind to those around me, but simultaneously shy and trying too hard to be polite because i am a people pleaser 😭 the type to act aloof in a situation, and then dwell on it, overthink, and let my anger fester after. “oh i should have said this thing” type deal. a lover of bitter foods and drinks. lastly, a HUGE albedo fan. my room is full of his merch and i’ve slept with the same body pillow for years cuz thats my mans !!!

4. i am a chronic loser of aura. never seen a drop of it in my life. last year i fractured my leg at the literal opener of a show after moshing too hard. proceeded to walk around on it for the next THREE BANDS telling people i probably just sprained it, and also tried to give up my seat at the bar to the vocalist of the band so he could eat tacos (he thought i was crazy and messaged me on twitter later to tell me so 😭) ended up finding multiple angles online of me breaking it, which got reposted by the band, for which they gave me FIVE BIG BOOMS for my leg. that got a thousand-something likes. they also gave me a free shirt the next time i saw them. i will let you decide if that’s aura or not.”

… If I wasn’t a Tumblr yandere smut blog, I would beg to see that video of you. I’m fucking dying at this story. I also really like baseball, it’s just unfortunately the sort of a sport that you need a lot of people for.

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ ASHVEIL!

I was gonna say Boothill at first, but I think the old wolf is a little bit of a better choice after all.

He’s also a bit of a hurricane when it comes to things he does: His schedule is all over the place, his impulse control is occasionally a little more on the lamentable side, and his intuition is… questionable. With him, you won’t ever have to worry about there being nothing to do, and if anything, you keep each other in the flow. 

But, all in all, he’s actually a very patient person, too, and I think it’s something that compliments your temper. He has years behind him, plus the Galaxy Rangers have always been a rowdy bunch, so as their leader, he had to grow a little bit of forbearance. Whenever you get a little bit too far into irritation, he’s going to be the one to put his hand on your back and say “that’s quite enough of that for now”. I’m not sure if it’s something you’re into, but he’s also a very touchy person, so you’ll get to enjoy that aspect of him as much as you would like to, too. 

Additionally, he very much has the heavier aesthetic, surely you listened to the song in his trailer? And, you can bond over takeout food and whatnot, I think the biggest burden in your financial situation is going to be that neither of you can say no to that. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@starry-springs-blog asked:

“Hi Riri, if you got this already, please discard this one. Reddit told me there was an issue so I had to rewrite but I’m not sure if it sent!

Congrats on the milestone and thank you for doing this!

1. Which fandom (Genshin or HSR)?

HSR

2.    Would you like a lady or a gentleman or will either do?

Gentleman please

3. What do you like to do, what sort of a person are you? This is a free-form: You can tell me about your hobbies, about your studies, your work, what you're fond of, what you heavily dislike, how you like to live your life, what you ate for breakfast today, that sort of thing. Whatever you're comfortable revealing to me and to the others that might be reading it along with the answer!

I think that I am someone who is a bit lost in the clouds. For years, I’ve been building a world in my mind and whenever I don’t need to actively use my brain, I’m writing, replaying, and rewriting the story in my head. It’s like my exclusive 24/7 tv show and I have gotten extremely attached to the characters. I think because of this, I can be a bit clumsy so I’m always tripping and bumping into corners. I am experienced enough to catch myself when I fall but I unfortunately do have a lot of bruises.

I really crave personal connections and I’m always trying to make friends. Even though I’m a bit shy, I always gravitate towards others. I would like to be mysterious but the issue is that I just talk too much. Whether I’m happy, sad, or anxious, I’m almost always talking if someone will listen, and people know that it’s genuinely serious when I’m quiet. I’ve been told that I’m always smiling to the point where my resting face gets mistaken for anxiety haha. I try to be more of a mom friend so I always have snacks, chargers, first aid, and related items in case someone needs them. I want to be someone dependable and it makes me happy when others rely on me.

In terms of personality flaws, I think the big ones are that I am slightly unforgiving and tend to bottle up my feelings. So if my first impression of someone is genuinely poor, I usually don’t end up changing my thoughts on them though I have had a few cases where we ended up being friends. If I have issues with a friend though, I’m much more forgiving and able to move past it. I really dislike being touched by people I’m not close to but I’m always holding hands with my close friends. I’m also a bit of a germaphobe but I am trying to expose myself to things that gross me out. I tire easily with most people and can only handle long hangouts with specific people. I think it’s a bit contradictory with what I said above but I do value having alone time and being able to think without interruptions.

I really value my freedom, both physically and in terms of how I live my life. I’ve been told that I am incredibly stubborn and difficult to convince when my mind is made up. I love taking long walks and I’m fine with all sorts of weather so I go in rain and shine. I struggle to sit still for very long unless I’m super engrossed in my work. I really love bright white lights and I feel like I cannot focus my eyes in ambient lighting. All of my apps are on light mode.

I majored in biology because I felt that it would give me opportunities to contribute to society and I found it fun in high school, however I did not want to be a doctor because I can’t really handle blood and the idea of surgery makes my knees weak. I’ve had a lot of set backs in my school life and career but I really have tried my best, and I want to keep moving forwards towards my goal no matter what.

4.  Describe the moment you farmed the most aura in the past year. Like flex on me the hardest you possibly can

I don’t really have a lot of aura but once in Mario party, I was dead last and got the reflex mini game with the max coin multiplier and I reacted so fast that I ended up winning the game.”

Worry not, it didn’t send twice! I’m also someone who gets bruises super easily, my mom had the exact same problem growing up. Climbing, especially, is something that leaves my knees and elbows and legs littered with them, but ever since I started considering them the marks of a warrior princess, I have been very sound with having them. 

… Are you rocking Tumblr on flashbang mode at night?

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ BOOTHILL!

Okay, I was also thinking of AE Sunny which is quite a jump from Boothill, but listen, now. 

It starts a little slowly, maybe with a bit of a timid “hi” from your direction, but the second he sees you, he’s all over you. At first, he can seem overbearing as he’s naturally a boisterous person, but as he figures out that he might be scaring you away, he turns down the rounds. After that point, the connection starts growing on its own.

It’s the opposiutes attract situation here as well. You’re more on the calmer, more responsible side while he makes sure that you won’t ever be having a boring moment. However, I think you could manage to calm him down as well — as in he won’t be pulling the gun out at every minor inconvenience anymore. The mom friend-ness is something that will prove to be quite useful with him, the guy is quite prone to forgetting stuff. 

He sure as hell listens if you have anything to say, and with his energy, you could end up having the national yappaton championship on the regular. When it comes to emotions, the great thing about him is that while he might not be the best at expressing his own in a way that isn’t very in-your-face, he’s great at bringing yours out of you. You know, he does have a very empathetic streak due to his past, and it’s a trait that starts blooming again when he’s with you. 

Oh, and long walks won’t be a problem, and it’s great that you don’t mind the weather because you’re going to be travelling a lot. Moreover, just like with his profession, he admires your dedication to your cause vastly. 

Lastly, considah: Him linking arms with you so that you don’t trip over anything when you walk around. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@baconbarbequeburger asked:

“Hello. This is my first time doing an ask, so I am sorry for any mistakes I might make here. I wanna say that I appreciate your ability to make disturbing stories of these hoyoverse characters, in the most complimentary tone I can say it in. I find reading their psychology very interesting.

1. Which fandom (Genshin or HSR)?

HSR ^^

2. Would you like a lady or a gentleman or will either do?

A gentleman.

3. What do you like to do, what sort of a person are you?

I will divide this into three very brief sections: personality (my inner thoughts, my inner worldview), how others tend to see me, and my hobbies.

As a person, I am practically a hermit, at least internally. I talk to many people, but genuine connections are hard to come around, so I stick to my childhood friend group whom I love dearly. I tend to struggle with connecting with others (Autism and paranoia lol) and find myself alienated from most people. However, I don't mind this at all. I've always kept to myself since I was a little child, usually focusing on my hobbies or studies, but I never restrict myself to isolation. I have always been told I am annoyingly curious and ask too many questions even about the most pointless and obvious things. I think I innately want to understand everything, and know everything (I want to keep this brief, so I won't go into much detail as to why). I like having unique experiences, which is why I actually enjoy meeting interesting people, even if I know I most likely won't maintain any close relationship with them. Overall, my main drive is focused on expanding my knowledge of the world, either through my academic studies or life experience. Life is a sort of adventure to me, and the mind is our guide! So I'd like to hone it by reading, talking to other people, or continuing to work hard with my academics.

Externally, people refer to me as polite but quiet. Some view me as intimidating at first due to my reputation as being "intelligent," as well as my tired countenance, but they eventually come to find me as more timid yet friendly! I think people come to find me nicer than they expect. I don't necessarily consider myself smart, but I hold this reputation at my school because of my academic achievements, which is why I am somewhat known to other people and I hear about what they think of me.

My hobbies consist of writing and reading, as well as playing visual novels. Not necessarily dating simulators, but sci-fi visual novels (e.g steins;gate. pls play it guys itll change your life). Otherwise, my interest in study is biology, and I really like parasites and viruses. Please talk to me about parasites and viruses. And books. I love and read ALL sorts of books. Especially uncomfortable horror books or sci-fi dystopians. I like silly, lighthearted kids books as well if I want something more fun.

4. Describe the moment you farmed the most aura in the past year. Like flex on me the hardest you possibly can

I do not want to flex because I am a superstitious person. Can't have envious eyes be the cause of my sudden downfall! But I have won a lot of academic awards, let's say.

5. And lastly, a sidequest that you can either do or not do, attach a shitty Paint-drawn portrait of yourself in the ask, and I will complete the drawing with your match!

i like toast, fast and easy to eat”

Thank you for saying that! I’m very glad to be the one to pop the ask-cherry, I’m truly honoured ദ്ദി(˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧

Microbes? Mad interesting. Prions? Even more interesting. Ever since I learned of their existence I’ve been insanely intrigued by the mechanism with which they operate. I encourage you to pursue biology as your field of study, it’s a great and diverse subject. 

People be like oh no I’m not smart and then I found out they’ve won multiple academic awards. Start flexing proudly or I’m going to do it for you 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ DR. RATIO

I think it’s fair to say that the academics and the pursuit for knowledge are very big connections here. 

Ratio isn’t a very emotional person, yes, but he isn’t completely devoid of any feelings, either — he just needs a very particular sort of a person to bring his more tender side out. He’s someone who can very much relate to the sense of being a little alienated because not a lot of people understand him, but at the same time, he has his own thing that he’s doing, and it’s what brings him a sense of purpose. It’s the same with you, from what I’ve understood, but with you two together, your agendas intertwine, and suddenly there’s another, like-minded person by your side.

Though he doesn’t show it, he goes crazy for the analytical take you have on things, plus I’d imagine that you’re attracted to the same thing. The dynamic works so well because of this, but also because of the fact that you’re more sociable than him: Seeing you walking around with him, you would probably have people wondering why the hell you would subject yourself to being with him like that, and you’re going to have to go through the “oh no he’s actually not that intimidating” talk with them, which ultimately ends up inviting more positive conversation. 

Moreover, I think he himself is going to grow a little more kinder with how he expresses his midn with you. Though he has strong opinions, he doesn’t want to offend you, and makes that clear in his own way. You’re the one person he will accept even the dumbest questions from with joy. 

I think he also likes a bit of opposition — it keeps him going and makes intellectual conversation possible. So, if you disagree with him on something, by all means, let him know, as he’d be more than happy to share his views and listen to yours. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

(⭐name) Lisa

“1. HSR

2. Of course, a wonderful man.

3. I'm absolutely crazy about all kinds of little trinkets. The cuter and smaller the object, the more I like it. Hair clips, stickers, crooked stuffed toys. My main hobby is some kind of handicraft – diamond mosaics, doing jigsaw puzzles, drawing. And if it's done with someone, it turns into the best day of my life. My main hobby, and the one I can pour my soul into, is photography. Shooting animals is my favorite, and recently I discovered bird photography – it turns out you can find so many of them in the city, not just crows and pigeons. And gifts, oh god… giving someone something from their wish list… That's the best moment in life. I'm ready to buy out the whole store just to make that person happy. But living with me is difficult: I cry very easily, I need hugs 24 hours a day, I'm a bad cook, I constantly crave sweets, and I create a mess in 3 seconds. Living with me is like living with a 5‑year‑old child, but for your patience, I'll give you lots of love.

4. Oh, well, probably several things? Thanks to a wonderful person, I returned to psychotherapy and started treatment, mustered up the courage and started my own TikTok with animal photos. Oh… and I'm finishing my master's degree and became a candidate of science.”

I’m a really big fan of this creature you have drawn for me, I must say. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ ARGENTI!

This ask is radiating love and positivity, and I think there’s only one guy who could handle it. 

Firstly, he’s an avid appreciator of all things beauty-related, and art is very much in that category. You have the skill to bring that sort of stuff to life, whether that be via drawing or the other sorts of crafts you’re into or with photography, and it’s something he finds to be a mesmerizing skill. He wants to do all of it with you, naturally, with over-the-charts levels of enthusiasm. 

This is an exceptionally good match in the emotional regard, too: You being sensitive and crying easily is all fine to him — it’s something he encourages, even! In his eyes, feelings are a beautiful part of how people express themselves, and you being comfortable enough with him to do so makes him love you even more. 

And when it comes to gift-giving, I think he’d be all for it. It’s just flower spam all around: He gets you roses you get him roses, he gets you this and that, you get him all sorts of stuff. He loves making you happy, and you love making him happy. Idrila is about to blow up from all the beauty. 

Also, he would love to be the model for your photography, and you best believe that zero (0) of the pictures end up bad because of his ridiculous photogenicness. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@the-last-f2p asked:

“OH MY GOD! I only saw the match-ups at 8:40 ON May 18th. I hope I’m not too late, feel free to ignore if I am, but this is so exciting I’m so excited aah!! I’ve been a fan since the Aventurine profile and I just wanted to say I love your writing AND your art. Enough of the glaze here we go:

Fandom wise: Honkai Star Rail all the way (had a small Genshin phase but that was EONS ago)

Either will do, but in HSR I usually prefer men (and Kafka lol)

Okay! I’m studying Aerospace engineering so I guess you can tell I’m a bit of a maths and science nut, I lowkey do maths in my (little, college kills 🙁) spare time. But besides that I like to read right now it’s The Outsiders, which is so not worth the hype, and Project Hail Mary, which is so worth the hype, I do some art as well but I’m not very good. I LOVE MUSIC AND I LOVE CONCERTS. Last one was Sabrina Carpenter, which was ages ago because I got busy was hoping to go to electric picnic (ZARA LARSSON, FONTAINES D.C AND DJO MY DREAM) but it was sold out needed to share that with someone because I am guttered. I’m quite a social person (HSR player who touches grass, rare spot right?) and I have quite a spending habit which is such a curse. Right now I’ve gotten really into Joni Mitchell so I went down to my local record shop and brought 5 of her vinyls, which I can admit is pretty bad, like what am I gonna EAT? There’s not loads I dislike besides things like people biting nails and bigots. Favourite movie was Mean Girls but I’m going to expose myself and say it’s now Companion (kind of niche but that’s just how we run in this city 😎) I ate waffles for breakfast today we love a Monday treat xoxo

4. Have I farmed aura this year? I’m a girl flop, dare I say. I got 100% in my last test? That’s aura farm, because these tests are HELL! Ahh I’m shivering thinking about some of them lolol

and here's me :3 awww look shes so cute

IGNORE MY ACCOUNT I RARELY ASK PUBLICLY BECAUSE I MADE IT WHEN I WAS LIKE 2 AND I WAS SO CRINGE JESUS I JUST WANTED TO ATTACH MY PORTRAIT!!

Hope I'm not too late, love you babes xx”

What a vibe you have. Listen, I know there are a lot of people who can’t stand the genre, but I am very much of the opinion that everyone, and I mean everyone, needs to have at least a little white girl music in their life. Thinkin’ ‘bout me every night, oh, is it that sweet I guess so and so on. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ AVENTURINE!

Baby if this isn’t precisely the most Aventurine-coded match-up ask I’ve ever seen.

Firstly, being a social person is 100% a need with him because you will hardly be catching a break from talking to this man. He likes to engage, he likes to do all sorts of stuff, whether that be going to casinos and emptying the whole place or going to concerts with you. I have this running joke of a headcanon that he listens to the HSR equivalents of Taylor Swift and Sabrina Carpenter and so on, so you’re going to match very nicely in that regard. 

Moreover, the spending habit won’t ever be a problem with him, for obvious reasons. He has a bit of a tendency to throw money at weird places, too, so if there’s anything you want, no matter how strange in the eyes of other people, you’re also going to get it.

He himself isn’t a science nut, but what does that matter? You’re all the more interesting to him when you have a little difference in interests. You can talk to him about your field all you want, and he’ll listen with his cheek propped against his hand. 

It’s giving a lowkey impulsive but funloving power couple that matches their outfits. Boom. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@vil-vermilion asked:

“The matchups still open right? Right? Im sure its still 18th somewhere...

Hsr for the fandom, and a gentleman please

I'm kinda stupid, and not in a fun cute way. I spend most of my days daydreaming about what isn't and what could be. And realise that i have a verrry important presentation and i have 3 days to rush it. But that's just life you know? I like watching long (picture 3+ hours) YouTube videos. Not in the background no, i actually pay attention to them, very fun. I like playing video games, and i sometimes pretend to speak gibberish while screaming in french. Also i imagine horrible scenarios before sleeping and end up with the most terrifying realistic nightmares (not even related to the things i picture in my mind)

And about my appearance, well

I have a mix of resting bitch face and baby face which makes me look like a constipated 14 year old, not fun.

Also my doctor asked me what grade was i in. I graduated school 5 years ago.

I like wearing the same type of clothes, like i own 2 different shirts and in one semester i would attend all my classes in those surely most people do the same ?

And i genuinely don't think I'm capable of aura farming, I'm a 5'6 man cursed to look 14 forever and spend my days playing gacha games and thirsting after men with questionable morals, the closest I've gotten to aura farming is 36 starring the abyss with 800ping. Not fun

Aaaand here's a very professional drawing of me + me and my totally real realistically proportioned Albert Wesker body pillow.”

This entire ask is sending me, and the drawing finished me off. What a way to end these match-ups. I have to say, I somehow didn’t consider the possibility of there being male or masc-aligned people among my readers since a big chunk of my work is cisfem!Reader, but I’m all the more happy to have you. I’ve always been a little curious about if there are people who don’t find the gender of the reader to be any sort of an issue when reading. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ GALLAGHER!

Okay you definitely need a calming force in your life. 

I think he’s a suitable guy to deal with the tornado that appears to be your daily routine. You know, he has what I like to call the big daddy aura: When he’s around, you simply don’t get the urge not to be all over the walls — it’s just the natural effect of his presence. Just one look from him and you’re like I’m sat. I know in my heart that you’re the sort of a person who’s all nonchalant king type of shit but when you have the attention of someone suave like him on you, it’s an immediate 180. 

He also pushes you to do stuff, and if need be, he quite literally picks you up and carries you to whatever task is to be done. Presentation, job application *shudders*, the dishes… It’s going to get done with him. 

Oh, and about the nightmares: He’s a natural banisher of those. Bro is a memetic entity, surely he can do something about them, but if not, him cuddling you to sleep like presented in the picture should be enough to keep your dreams sweet. 

This is a heavily overused joke that still unfortunately makes me laugh: The cursed-to-look-14-forever thing won’t be a problem with him because he’s 13. And, if anything, he has the questionable morals you thirst after. I rest my case. 

@anemochiii asked:

“Hello, hello! I've come to participate in your Match-Ups Event!

Fandom of choice: HSR

A gentleman would be lovely ♥︎

As for who I am as a person, I consider myself to be a very smart person, someone who is an ambivert, and I have a witty (and unfortunately dry) sense of humor. I am fascinated by the weather (deadass you'll catch me staring at clouds, and I might be able to tell you what kind of clouds they are), and I'm currently attending college as a meteorology major. Unfortunately, I am very susceptible to ragebait, especially if it's something that's blatantly wrong, like someone misinterpreting something and basing everything else on the wrong info; I might even throw hands (or at least my phone 😔) if the ragebait is that bad. I enjoy reading and doomscrolling. I'm very fond of cats, my family, the weather, movie/video game OSTS, and other things. I DESPISE slow walkers, people who chew with their mouths open, and wrong people who won't see any reason as to why they're wrong and continue to believe that they're right (like arguing with a brick wall). I like schedules in my life, too. I'm also pretty crafty, and I'm lowkey confident I could outwit a yandere or two.

The last time I aura farmed was when I was watching the Kentucky Derby (the Derby is a huge and famous horse race that happens every year on the first Saturday of May) with my friends, and I chose Golden Tempo as my bet to win. Golden Tempo had like 20-1 odds, and I chose him because he had a female trainer (a rarity) and I liked his name and thought he was cute. Everybody thought I was crazy for choosing him, but Golden Tempo actually ended up winning the Derby with a spectacular comeback from like dead last! I'm like $100 richer now, too.

I unfortunately can't draw for the life of me, and I refuse to subject you to a horrendous sight, so I can at least give you a description of my appearance: I have long, kinda wavy hair with a middle part, I'm short at my big adult age (literally 5'2"), and I guess I also have a little bit of an RBF.

Thank you!!!!! Pls keep cooking, queen!!! (good lord this is long... feel free to omit anything if you're worried about spacing or if you just feel like omitting it)

Also, did you know that the Coriolis Effect (the deflection direction of air masses depending on your hemisphere, thanks to Earth's rotation) is responsible for the East-Northeast pathways/directions that most storms in the Northern Hemisphere follow?”

Don’t worry babygirl, the cooking is in motion. 

I’ve always thought meteorology to be a mad interesting field of study. I was really fond of geography and such in high school, and it ended up being the one subject that I did the finals on as “an extra” that I didn’t need for medschool. I remember finding the Coriolis a little difficult to grasp at first because of how it affects the air currents and whatnot, but the whole concept is beyond fascinating. Best of luck to you on the studies, one of these days I’m gonna send you a picture of a random cloud in the sky and ask you what sort it is and if you get it wrong I’m blocking you

I’m also a huge fan of OSTs, I semi recently fell in love with Christopher Larkin’s work on Silksong, Choral Chambers is actually insane work. Listen, regarding the horse races, surely you have heard of the legendary Potoooooooo? I must know. 

In light of this information, I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ DAN HENG!

Okayokayokay at first, when reading your description of yourself, I was like ok what about Anaxa because of the science stuff plus the fact that you could be a balancing factor to this mf’s craziness, but then I reread the ragebait and arguing part and went like ok no. 

I think Dan Heng and you would get along really nicely because he’s someone who likes spending time alone, and you’re an ambivert, so he can both offer you a listening ear and leave you to be when you appear to need it. Furthermore, he has the rare ability to just linger in someone’s presence in the way where you’re not actively socializing with him but you’re still with him, and I think that’s a very valuable asset for ambiverts. He reads people quite well in general, and he doesn’t have the innate urge to tease you or hit you with that sweet sweet ragebait, so you don’t have to fear any sort of impromptu debate with him.

Moreover, the things you’re fond of and the things you don’t enjoy seem to be quite fitting for being with him: Listening to music and reading (he likes that too!!) and doomscrolling and such are calm and kind of non-eventful activities if you know what I mean. Then, I think he’d love to take you out to the Scalegorge Waterscape at the Luofu and point out to the sky and go like “how do those form?” just because he knows you like explaining that stuff. Also, he’s a man of zero-wasted-fucks energy in the way that he, too, (I imagine) has beef with slow walkers and such, and he doesn’t like to argue pointless matters. Alsoalsoalso, he would totally get you one of the cat-pastry-things that Ruan Mei made, yandere or not. 

The aura farming part also fits because I suppose you would need to win quite a few gambles to escape from the AE in a yan scenario. The mere wit isn’t unfortunately enough to flee the space train, but I wish you the best of luck on that effort. Also, like, Cloudhymn. CLOUDhymn. Cloud. Weather, cloud. It was meant to be.

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@fancyfeathers asked:

“Hello! I saw the matchup post and I thought I would try my hand as well as congratulate you on your one year anniversary… soon you will start to forget how long you have been doing this for and start to go crazy, just like me- Anyway!

As for the info on me for the matchup, I was hoping you can do Honkai Star Rail for me.

-I am an INFP

-I am a Pisces

-I am bisexual (so either men or women are fine)

-My hobbies include writing, painting, sewing, cooking or like going out to night markets with my friends, I love ballet but that is my actual job and less so a hobby

-I would say I am pretty introverted for the most part besides a few people who I am close to, I really enjoy studying things about books and authors lives. I do tend to be a bit forgetful sometimes about just the little things, and I set side tracked easily, I have ADD to say the least. I am also the type of person who does not really like to look at the whole of life and instead I like to look forward to the little things and enjoy what I have while I have it, like I love to travel just because if I can then I want to see and do things. I also tend to get caught up in my head daydreaming sometimes, like I could be like just sitting there for almost an hour doing nothing but imagining things, same thing with writing or art, like when I get inspired for a piece I will literally loose track of time till it is one in the morning and I remind myself that I have to sleep. Sometimes I get so sidetracked in things that I either have to set reminders to take care of myself or someone has to remind me to take care of myself.

-I suffered from some pretty serious self esteem issues due to my early days in my job as a ballerina and while I recovered from them now, it is still a huge part of me.

-Just some other facts...

-I have a bunny named Robin, after Robin from HSR, bunnies, cats, Arctic foxes are my favorite animals.

-I am multilingual, I speak Greek, Cantonese, Mandarin Chinese, English, and I am learning a bit of Spainish.

-I am Wasian, Chinese and Greek

-Also I know I was supposed to send a shitty drawing of myself and this is a quick sketch of myself I did, I know it’s not like as bad as you said it should be but I sketched it up really quickly while I am waiting for my to go order

I hope you have a wonderful day! That’s all! ❤️”

“Oops I also meant to add this in my original matchup ask but I also took your darling type quiz and I am a timid darling apparently

Which actually makes a lot of sense for me… anyway-”

-Fancy 🪽❤️”

Hiii, Fancy, it’s good to see you! I noticed a while ago that I got added to the moot list, I was mad honoured. 

I’ve always admired people who speak lots of languages, that’s a super impressive feat. I myself also speak three languages (English, my native, and a neighboring country’s) and I’ve thought of learning a fourth one. Japanese was big on the list, and I can read and understand it to some degree, but I’ve recently started looking at French as a potential one, too. Oh, and I recently learned the lyrics to that one Genshin song that plays in Nod-Krai, Forsaken Hymn, it has (ancient?) Greek lyrics, and I’ve been brutally butchering the pronunciation in favour of getting to sing the melody. You have a very beautiful language. 

I have a huge respect for ballet, the working environments are merciless in some places from what I’ve heard. It’s such a beautiful art and dance form, and I’m glad that the culture surrounding bodyshaming and such is slowly shifting. I wish you a wonderful time with the sport, a lot of people can’t comprehend just how difficult it is. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ BLACK SWAN!

It’s giving dreamy, it’s giving moderately gleamy, it’s giving a little bit steamy. I’m also pretty sure that I am smelling a hint of perfectionism in the air. 

I think Black Swan would be a particularly good match for you because you’re giving off the same sort of energy that is kind of serene, appreciative-of-life, and controlled in its own way. She has this mysterious aura that compliments yours (especially if the timid darling hits home), and she’s definitely a mass hit with the introverts. The calmness and patience is a very big factor in it all: You won’t be subjected to constant yappatons — she’s there whenever you want and need her to be, nothing less and nothing more. If you’re ever about to get sidetracked, you can be sure that she’s going to be there to put you back on said track with very tasteful words and a few encouraging pushes. 

In my humble opinion, she’s also a fan of arts because of the fact that they carry people’s conception of the world around them. With her job, finding those sorts of visions is not only very valuable but enjoyable, too — your hobbies are pretty much a perfect fit for that. You know, some like to say that not remembering to take care of yourself in favour of being invested in bursts of inspiration translates to helter-skelterness (I have a new favourite word), but I’d argue that it’s just a form of exceptional focus that especially artistic people tend to have. Plus, the world view regarding focusing on the little things in life fits her perspective as well: She collects memories, each being a tiny individual part of such moments, meaning that you kind of feed her interest in that way, too. 

She would also absolutely go to places like night markets with you, that’s her whole image. All things a little obscure are up her alley, and travelling is also something that you get to enjoy to your heart’s content with her. Lastly, this might be a what-an-odd-thing-to-say moment, but I think she’d find the fact that you’re multilingual (and presumably have experience in two very different cultures) very intriguing.

Also, consider: When you’re too deep into the daydreams and need to take a break, she literally pops up in your mindscape and goes like what’s good darling.

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

“Hi Miss Riina, congrats on your milestone again!! Can I have a match for Genshin please? (Male characters preferably ><)

I like books, drawing, music (live bands!!), spending time with people I love, and can be a yapper around people I'm comfortable with. I also like animals (search up a triggerfish...) and playing games (I'm a bloodthirsty moba support main /j). Though I Iike making new friends, I'd say I'm introverted leaning ;;; I'm actually annoyed by a lot of things... inefficiency and people who are inconsiderate/entitled being some of them...

I'm currently studying in a double microbio-biotech major, and really prone to stress and perfectionism. I'm really bad at taking care of myself and have over working and over planning tendencies... Despite all that I'm still try to make time for my friends because I'll get depressed and miss them if I lock myself up to study too much. I'd say my love languages are quality time and physical touch!!

I don't think I've aura farmed much in the past year? I've mellowed out a lot but I used to be insane once and beat up my stalker/friend's bully (dragged them to the school trash site and dumped them there) because I was fed up. Now when I share past stories with my friends they're scared and mildly impressed when I tell them that ;;;;

Thank you for the match-up and take care!! 💗

- 🫧 anon”

Oh Bubbles, my Bubbles. 

I am proud to let you know that I, in fact, know what a triggerfish is, solely because of that one reaction image. Also, for the record, violence is never the answer but like,,, go off queen.

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ LYNEY!

There are two sorts of introverts in this world: Those who need another introvert as a partner and those who need a yapper 2000 as their partner, and I would bet that you’re in the latter category, Bubble. Sure, you need your alone time, but when you’re ready to spend your social battery, you best believe that he’s there to entertain you to your heart’s content. You can yap to him all you want; he responds with the same level of enthusiasm if not with more. Plus, when you’re in a talkative mood and need someone to just listen but he’s not around, there’s also his heavily introverted sister who you might find is your kindred spirit. 

Anything to do with live shows is his thing, and live music is naturally included in that, so you can be certain that he’s going to attend concerts with you. Moreover, calmer hobbies such as the drawing and reading you mentioned are things he can appreciate, too — he asks you to recommend a book or two. Touch? You won’t get his hands off of you, but he does it all in such a tasteful and suave way that it’s never, ever going to be a problem. 

When it comes to your perfectionism and work ethic, he takes it as his mission to be the one to pull you out of it. Whenever you’re struggling with finding the point where you should declare something finished, he comes behind you, takes you by the shoulders, tells you “Dear, it’s good enough” and drags you away from the task. 

And, a sense of justice is something he finds super attractive. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@ferndrabbles asked:

“Hello!! Congrats on the big one year !!

1 - HSR please

2 - pref for a gentleman 🫶

3 - personality wise I like to think i'm quite calm (at least on the outside), I'm very quiet and get overwhelmed easily. I have a very small social battery and prefer to do solo activities like going to café's, walking around new areas etc, pretty much anything thats quiet and chill. I do like to be playful with my friends though! I'm usually very slow at things, taking stuff at my own pace but i can push through and adapt to do things quicker (even if it stresses me out more often than not💔). I'm often described as a mom friend by my friends because I tend to fuss over everyone and always have anything you may need in my bag lol. Other than that, I'm a marine biology student but currently work as a cook in a restaurant to make a little bit of money.

My two main hobbies are gardening and fishing but I also enjoy baking, puzzles, and anything creative(sewing, crochet etc)!

I dont really have any dislikes other than beans. I really REALLY dislike beans 👎

4 - I'll be 100% honest, I am an absolute girl failure who is either studying or working all the time so I have no time to aura farm, i only aura lose💔 maybe next year I'll have a story...

Thank you so much for blessing us with your writing 🫶 it always make my day when I see you post !! Good luck with all the matchups and happy one year again yaay🫶”

Thank god you didn’t want a Genshin match-up because the bean line would have sent you straight to Itto. 

I’m also guilty of having anything and everything in my bag, I like to call it Narnia because of the sheer volume of stuff I fit in it. It’s also very heavy, I’m starting to suspect that the slight waist dip I have on one side might be a consequence of always carrying it on one shoulder. Oops

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ LUOCHA!

There’s, like, so much that fits here: Luocha is very much calm, very much non-overstimulating, and very, very classy about social matters. He knows exactly when to talk, what to say, and when to shut up — merchant stuff, you know. His presence is naturally serene, and the energy rubs off on you in all the right ways. He allows you to do things at your own pace as you said, and he’s very mindful of your limits and making sure that you’re comfortable with whatever he does.

I don’t know if I can put it into words, but he, also, gives that mom friend vibe. He’s innately great at reading the room and making sure that the people he cares about are doing alright, even if he’s not the most emotional person and doesn’t always show his appreciation through big reactions. Moreover, I think that’s a fact you’ll like about him: He doesn’t let his feelings sway him in a way that would end up with either of you having to raise your voice or get uncomfortable. He’s your personal de-stresser with his stability. 

But, he has that little cheeky streak going on when you need it, too. I know for a FACT that he likes to tease you every now and then — all in good faith, obviously. It’s the sort of tasteful banter that gets you to do a double-take before covering your face or swatting his arm, but don’t worry, his hand is already on your head, and there’s a slight, loving smile on his features. 

Gardening? Bro literally spawns flowers, who could be a better match? Furthermore, I think he would also love spending time in silence while doing a puzzle with you — it’s the silence that usually conveys the most emotion with him. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@tabrvs asked:

“hi hi hi congrats on your one year celebrate 🎉 may i pls get a hsr matchup? i’m bisexual with a male pref. :) oki so for my personality im very dramatic, i get excited easily, and am a bit overly sensitive i’m an infj & cancer, & i try my best to be optimistic no matter what. im a big fan of my own personal space bubble though!!  i love anything soft or cute, especially animals!! im kinda scared of bugs though, but i still always try to take them outside. i tend to be a bit bossy and unreasonable when it comes to something i’m interested in. plus i get really moody and irrational sometimes when it comes to something i want (im very stubborn lol). i also really like going for walks, shopping, yoga, gardening, baking (even though i’m dreadfully awful at it), and reading. i try to see the best in everything & everyone, though i can’t really tolerate it if somebody is overly cruel or rude to the people i care about. i have a very “do no harm, take no shit” mentality  :) for my appearance, im 5’2 & have fairly long light brown hair. my eyes are hazel, im fairly pale with a few freckles sitting across my face, & my cheeks are perpetually rosy andjfjjek. my style ranges from pretty soft and girly to an adam sandler rip off (it’s lovely). but mostly i really like dressing up even if i’m not going anywhere. i also really like to do makeup, both on myself and others. also since i’m on the shorter side, i like to wear platform shoes since being tall makes me feel cool! and uhhhhhh for aura farming GOD i am truly so boring i really don’t do much uhhh ive gotten better at standing up for myself this year so ig i feel cool when i do that ?? that counts? that counts … 

please & thank you!! have a nice day <3”

Why are all of you saying that you didn’t farm aura, I know for a FACT that y’all are just being humble with me. Go, farm the aura, the aura is ready to be farmed. I once had a girl do makeup on me, that has to be among the most girlypop moments I’ve ever had in my life. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ ARGENTI!

You know, a drama queen needs another drama queen.

It’s the optimism and emotional sensitivity that make you match so well with him. Argenti is all about the good and beautiful things in life, and he (as well as you, probably) needs someone who can compliment that worldview. Moreover, he’s very much the kind of a person who always sees the best in everyone, much like you, and the magic of it all is what you bond over. Plus, he has a great sense of justice which you do as well. 

I think he’d actually be quite attracted to your bossy qualities, too. First and foremost, he’s the devoted follower type of a person, and I am so fucking sure of the fact that he’d be like yes ma’am with the most loving look on his face when you get a little assertive with what you do. 

And, whenever there’s a bug inside the house, you’ll both be screaming, but he will be your knight in shining armour, slide the creature into a cup, and take it outside. Also, rosy cheeks. ROSY cheeks. Rosy. Call me Ashveil the way I’m reading into these clues. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

“1. HSR please :3

2. Preferably a fellow

3. Apple lore! So regarding my work I’m an American nursing student and my hobbies include reading (duh), cooking, and sewing although I am not too good at it (‘:

4. Back in march i was at a shooting range for a friend’s birthday and I hit the center of my shooting target 5 times in a row

- 🍎”

Hello, Apple, great to see you alive and well. I think you’re the one to send me the shortest description out of all, but you are also fortunately a person I have talked to before, so I have material to work with. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ BOOTHILL!

Is this rootin’ tootin? I think it is. 

You have many thoughts, as speaks the evidence in my inbox, and you need a certified yapper by your side to fuel that energy. Boothill needs a partner that can, to at least some degree, match the chaos that his personality is, but at the same time, he also needs the calming effect of your presence when the pedal is already on the metal and you’re driving 100 mph. Your hobbies are all the sort that kind of bring the rounds down and allow him to sit still for a while while watching you do your thing and maybe talking about how the day was. And, I think that most of the people who go to nursing school have at least a bit of a caring instinct in them, which does wonders for the chemistry in this relationship. 

I am sorry but the shooting range thing is SCREAMING Boothill, he would actually go crazy for someone who can do that. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@yandere-romanticaa asked:

“Omg omg, I feel honored that I helped inspire this event - may I participate!

I'd love HSR and I'd love a GENTLEMAN even more! 💓

As for my personality, hm. I am a very bubbly and chatty person I feel like. I really enjoy reading (specifically gothic literature, horrors/thrillers and recently have even delved into occult stuff LMAO, fantasy is also ok and romance will be either a hard NO ir hard YES), going on walks and listening to scary story podcasts, watching tv shows and tbh, I also just really seem to enjoy taking care of my home and family. My cooking is improving so nicely.

I am someone who really lives inside her own head through maladaptive daydreaming and this is something that I high-key want to stop doing. The flex part in your post made me flinch because the past year was one of the single roughest ones in my life - I cut off my best friend, and the rest of the group kind of just followed like a house of cards after that. It was all a bad cocktail which consisted of me not speaking up in time (but also often being punished for it if I did), my own needy nature and their own pettiness and casual cruelty. That's why I'm kind of having a hard time describing my personality rn bc this kind of scarred me and made me a lot more closed off and just kind of more afraid of talking to people, scared of judgment... Ever since I was little, I was always just different. Not bad, not good per say. Just different and people sense that. I'm learning how to get my spark back and when I'm in my element, I can be very blunt and observational, but I've been told that I can be incredibly kind, gentle and doting too. People also say I can be both eccentric and mysterious a bit as well, always just sort of doing my own thing and never bothering to explain it. When I fall for someone, it's bad bro - they're in my head 24/7 and I just want to be under their skin, and vice versa. I just have really powerful emotions that can lift me up or knock me down a peg.

However. The moment I feel as though you don't truly want me, I will shut you out. It's kind of like a switch - once I'm done, I am DONE. I have a lot of patience so this isn't something I do flippantly either. I can either love you from the bottom of my heart, or I will flat out delete you from my life. That friendship breakup really solidified that as well, only further toughening up that fact. I suppose that could be the flex, getting rid of people who no longer are good for you.

I'm just kind of going through life rn. It's lonely, but also exciting. I try to keep my chin up and just march on forward, simply because I don't like giving up. I'm trying to lose weight (I freaking love protein pudding with strawberries haha) and am trying to find my place in the world. I also hunger for romanceeeeee but we'll see if that's in the cards for me.

Speaking of cards, I also got into tarot which is neat. I'm kind of freaked out bc every reading I did for myself ended up becoming true somehow, but I'm still a newbie. I adore candles too, my room is filled with them. I like roses and flowery perfumes.  I journal too, have been for years. I'm currently on my 3rd diary.

I feel like I missed something... If I did, please tell me.

Otherwise - cute event!”

OMG OMG HIII GIRL 😳😳😳 Welcome to my best attempt at matching your cute self without giving into the bias of knowing that you already have a certain few characters that you like. 

I get what you mean by trying to find yourself, self-reflection and such are really important qualities to have, and from what I’ve seen, it’s something you do great in, so try not to doubt yourself too much in that regard. Moreover, what I’ve found that comforts me when there are lots of moving parts is that in life, there are very rarely inherently right or wrong choices. If anything, there are various genres of right choices, so to speak, and a myriad of neutral choices. Sure, some can be bad, but I’ve sworn myself to believe in the fact that you really can’t grow without making mistakes. Don’t be afraid to fuck around and find out. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ ASHVEIL!

You wrote gentleman in caps in the ask, and a gentleman with a capital G is what you’ll get babygirl. 

Ashveil’s appearance gives off the aura that he’s a little closed off and aloof, but I think it’d be precisely what would drive you to him. It’s within a few minutes of conversation that you find out just how goofy this person actually is inside, how much he has to say, how well he listens to you, all of it. 

He’s the horror sort of a guy, you can’t get anywhere from that. It’s something that compliments your intrigue in all things a little macabre and dark, but the rest of his personality feeds the cheerful part of you. You can play around together, but you can also trust him to switch the joking mode off and focus on just lingering in each other’s presence without any hurry. Depending on your style, you can either be the stereotypical emo-ass couple or the ever-cursed black and pink combo. 

I think he’d find consolation in the fact that your worldviews are similar in the sense that you’ve had to let dear people go from your life. He has made enemies and seen people die, and albeit your experience (hopefully) isn’t as drastic as that, the understanding of the pain of being alone is something that brings him comfort. 

Not to be dramatic but he would also want to get into your skin in the best way possible. You’re telling me that the man who has mad cuteness aggression over dogs wouldn’t have that same energy about you? You’ll have him squeezing you, twirling you around like in romance movies, and holding your hand at every possible moment. 

Oh, and he’s absolutely interested in all things a little superstitious, no matter how delulu the things you read off the cards are. He would regularly ask you to do a reading on him, just to see what could happen, and if he gets a depressing result out of it, he asks you to do it again. 

You know what else he would do? He would send you voice messages in the narrative style of a podcast because he knows you like those. Like, “I got us takeout, be at my place soon” spoken in the ASMR-ish voice. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@concha-404 asked: 

“Can't believe it's already been a year, I remember when I first ate up ur Mydei profile 😭💕

1. Preferably hsr 😗🫶

2. Either gender works

3. Shi well I really like to read and watch people solve different kinds of ARGs and character analysis, I also have an obsession with playing gacha games although none have really stuck with me like hsr, genshin, and twst. I love exploring game lore sm. I also like to watch fantasy animes like gachiakuta, witch hat atelier, and one piece (on the latest arc rn) and sometimes ill read the manga if I like the series enough.

I hate tape. I hate tape with a passion. The way that it sounds, the way that it sticks sucks too but holy THE SOUND. It's like nails on a chalkboard to my ears. I hate being whispered near my ear too. Hate is a strong word but I have such strong feelings towards it AGH.

I'm currently studying a tech related degree. I like to sleep and just be in bed with my ever growing army of stuffed animals whenever I can. I think the longest I ever slept was like 16 hrs or smth, but I also like to travel, hike, and try new foods although i'm stuck in college hell most of the time. I'm really into hair care (was all over the hair drawings u made AGH). Main philosophy in life is It is what it is, until it's an exam that decides my future in which case it's in my best interest if I die yesterday (jkjk). To top this off I had chicken sandwiches for breakfast :D

4. Does going down the Takabisha rollercoaster count? If not then like the only other thing I can think of at the moment is beating Silksong on steel soul mode, felt so proud of myself 💕💕”

OH YOU’RE AN OG. Welcome back babygirl/babyboy/babything. 

Fighting for my life trying to make sure that you won’t be subjected to tape with the person I match you with. I’m also a big fan of plushies, I have a collection of over 100 of a certain plush in different colours, they watch me from the shelf as I write. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ MARCH 7TH!

Don’t worry, I didn’t find a single inch of tape on her, I checked.

I just know you have such similar hobbies. Gacha games? She’s probably lowkey addicted. Fantasy anime? Absolutely watches those. Napping in a mountain of plushies? Have you seen her bed. Hair care? Without a doubt. Trying new things? Obviously, even if that includes getting over the fear of going to a rollercoaster and almost vomiting right after. 

Listen, with lowkey chaotic people (which I diagnose you as), they either need a calming force in their life or someone who is equally as all-over-the-place, and I think March fits the second category. She doesn’t stress the little things that much, and as you respond with the same energy, both of you can live in that blissful bubble. Yeah, you can end up in difficult situations every once in a while where she crashes out and you take it with the it-is-what-it-is, but with the optimism-realism you both have going on, it’s nothing you won’t be able to handle.

She’s also very touchy with you but like very cutely. The haircare, especially, is something she vastly enjoys doing with you. Like, bathing together, then taking turns washing each other’s hair, then helping you do whatever it is that you do with your routine. She would also absolutely lather the foam in her hands and then try to mould cat ears onto your head with it. Also, consider: Cuddle-napping with her right after where you both still smell like the shower. 

For the record, I thought of King Yuan at first but then I read the ear thing and bro would lowkey highkey get off on whispering in your ear, so that was that. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@amidyllic asked:

“Hi Riri 👋 🌱💚

I saw that you're doing match-ups and wanted to know if I could get one, please. I hope I'm doing this right and on time:

1. HSR

2. I would like the gentleman, please

3. I suppose I'm a calm person? I'm introverted, definitely, but I can be social. Maybe reserved is the better word, but once you get to know me, I can be expressive.

I'd say I'm empathetic and reflective, but also I tend to overthink and withdraw when overwhelmed. I can also be idealistic, but I need structure and reassurance. I'm affectionate, yet also a cautious person, too?

I'm not too sure how to describe myself, or rather I get a bit embarrassed to talk about myself, so I just say I'm infj 6w7 or phlegm-mel.

I enjoy drawing, reading, crocheting, cooking, gardening, and gaming. Things you do indoors mostly and can be done by yourself or with someone else. I studied animation,  graphics design, and photography, though I kinda dislike graphics and photography... animation was more my passion.

Surprisingly, I didn't go into either field. For animation, I was only an intern, but there's no work for arts here, so I'm in a different field.

If I could live my life the way I want it, I think I'd like it peacefully, where I don't have to worry about anything and can just enjoy doing things that I like.

I like the idea of a cottage vibe home where I have a pretty garden of my own, growing herbs, fruits, veg, flowers, and such. Things I can use in cooking or that I can use to make my own diy things like soaps, perfumes, etc. Or things like that. Just to experiment or grow as a person and things i can do. Ah, I feel like I'd be a bit depressed if I'm just stuck in one place, so I do feel like I'd like to go out a bit

4. Oh dear, I dont think I have a flex to say, I think the only thing I can say is that I'm more active this year and have gone on runs after work. I'm really chubby, so I really want to lose weight. I've been doing runs on the beach side when I can, though, cause it's winter here, I can only do workouts indoors ( ´;ﾟ;∀;ﾟ;)”

Hello, honey! 

Best of luck to you on the weight loss journey. A lot of people don’t understand just how much work goes into it and how much individual differences can affect your weight, but I think you’ve got way more willpower to succeed than you would think, and even putting your mind into it like you have is a super commendable feat. I would also like to present you with a totally-not-biased, completely shameless advertisement for climbing: Available year-round and possible almost everywhere if you get creative enough, both cardio and strength training, and perfectly individual-based. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ ARGENTI!

There is nobody else in HSR who gives as much cottagecore vibes than him, I’m afraid. 

You know, if you’re the calmer and a little melancholic sort of a person, he would be the perfect complement for you with his never-ending optimism and openness. The courting part of it all might be a wild ride to you if you’re not used to being the centre of someone’s attention like that, but every last bit of the energy he exudes is positive, and it’ll rub off on you, too. 

Empathy, especially, is a quality he’s drawn to in people, and you have that going on with you. Regarding the tendency to overanalyze things, he fortunately has the innate quality of calming people down when need be: He’s a major source of reliability that you get to enjoy. You can also be just as shy as you want with him, he merely finds that all the more endearing. 

Calm hobbies aside (which he vastly adores), he’s going to be the one to drag you out of the house when you need to literally touch grass so you don’t get too far into the depressive spiral. He’s used to travelling quite a lot, meaning that you have a partner that can safely take you places without the fear of you ending up in scary or unpredictable situations (or at least ones that he wouldn’t be able to solve). As said, the cottagecore vibe is so-so-SO much up his alley, you would live like they do in the movies. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@sakuramantis asked:

“Hiiiii Miss Riina. This is my submission for tbe match-ups ^^

1: HSR

2: Either (bye bye bye by NSYNC plays)

3: I'm an indoor person. I like to read, play games and watch new shows rather than go outside. I have social anxiety and so I *hate* crowded places lol. But I can tough it out if need be. But yeah, clubs and bars and stuff? 1000% not for me. Never been and never will. It's sensory hell. Sensory issues really have me in a chokehold 💔 And I don't like drinking or drunk people, so just an extra nope. I'd honestly rather listen to nails on a chalkboard than go to one.

I hate summer because I'm someone who owns heavier, more winter-y clothes and I always have to have long sleeves and something covering my legs, so summer's genuine hell for me 😓 And I live in the UK where our summers are BRUTAL because of how humid it is + our buildings are designed to retain and trap heat. Send help.

I eat the same four meals because autism's fucked me raw and rough and left me with the palette of a toddler (omg so shocking, who'd ever be able to tell I have the tism????). I'm a dead blunt and honest person. I'm not rude, I know when honesty is and isn't appropriate, like I'm not gonna tell a child their drawing is shit, but I'm very much the person you come to if you want an honest opinion, and I don't like to be dishonest to spare someone's feelings. Like, if your partner's a piece of shit, I'm gonna say it to your face and theirs 🤷🏻‍♀️

I also get unsympathetic quick. Like if you come complaining to me about something and I spend time consoling you and giving you advice, only for you to ignore all of it and refuse to change/go back to whatever upset you? Then I point blank don't wanna hear about it ever again lmao. If you're gonna stay in a situation that upsets you, then you have no right to complain. You know how all the comments of videos with women with their shitty partners is now "Either leave him or don't come crying to us about it?" Because the women were constantly making excuses, like "You can't judge our relationship off a two minute video!!"? Yeah that's me lol. Do not involve me.

Pretty stubborn about my beliefs and ways. Like not willing to compromise on them in the slightest. I hold myself and the people in my life to a high moral standard ig you could call it. All humans deserve equal rights, love is not a sin, no one is illegal on the earth we all inhabit, children are the most oppressed group, corporal punishment is abuse, etc. So yeah, very far left. Especially since it all hits very close to home for me, growing up in an abusive household and being queer and trans. I've cut off my entire family for their right-wing beliefs and bigotry so I won't hesitate for someone I've just met lol.

More of a STEM person than a social sciences. I love social sciences and I've done them for GCSE, but they are way, *way* harder than STEM. This idea that STEM is harder than social sciences is such bs. You need to be wayyyy more intelligent for social sciences. It's pure misogyny because STEM is more male dominated but social sciences are more female dominated, so they've dubbed the "men's" subject as the more difficult one to inadvertently say that men are smarter. Uggghhhh it boils my blood. STEM's just black and white for the most part: A + B = C, and that's what I like about it. Stuff like sociology and psychology? Pure greyness. Loads of nuance. A million times more difficult. Also essay's are my biggest weakness and social sciences just have too many 😭 (take a shot for every time I said social sciences or STEM)

Also a cat person. Love love love LOVE cats. I live by the idea that anybody who doesn't like cats but LOVES dogs is a red flag, because cats are boundary animals where everything happens on *their* terms, but a dog will bend over backwards to please you. So run for the hills if you meet a cat hater that's a dog lover. I don't hate dogs myself, but I definitely don't like them as much as cats. Dogs are very needy and it overwhelms me tbh. And I don't like how human their tongues feel 😭 I grew up with cats so I'm used to the sandpaper texture lol. The first time a dog licked me it scared me because I didn't know their tongues weren't sandpaper-y.

I went on a bit of a rant for the 'About me' section. Sorry 😓

4: I've won my last 4 50/50's in a ROW in HSR. And I got Ashveil in one 10 pull right after getting Sparxie. And I still have 90 pulls to go for Blade's SP, and I still haven't finished the events to get the primos from them or bought all the refreshed top-ups or the battle pass (I'm a dolphin do not judge me 💔)

5: I present to you an art piece that rivals the works of legends and prodigies both old new, the likes of which this world has never seen before and will never see again:”

I would formally like to congratulate you on the single most shitty drawing sent to me during this event. I actually got water up my nose when I opened the notification. You don’t suffer with autism, you succeed with autism. 

Now, now, listen, I’m afraid I’ll have to partially disagree with the STEM vs social sciences claim: In my humble opinion, both fields require different genres of intelligence that overlap at certain parts, and saying either one is more difficult than the other is merely dependent on the person in question. I have met fiercely intelligent people from both domains, regardless of gender, who would actually start crying if they were subjected to the other’s studies. I would also like to take personal offence in the pet part of your ask because I am, in fact, a person who loves dogs but is mildly afraid of cats. I think I’ll have to delete my blog now

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ GEPARD!

You know where you don’t have to be subjected to hot weather? Belobog. You know whose moral compass is as straight as I am for Mydei? Who’s not afraid to be blunt when need be? Who’s not afraid to take warranted criticism? Who’s willing to be the one to take a stepo back when you need space? Geppie. 

Listen, listen, I’m willing to die on the hill that Geppie is actually a massive introvert that likes to spend time inside when he’s not out at work (which he is a lot, but regardless). All of those genes went straight to his sisters, and so, while he can be the big and strong party in your relationship, he can also be a soft, calm, lowkey socially drained golden retriever ragdoll that just wants to cuddle up on the couch and watch some shows with you. 

Moreover, I think your strong values are something that attracts him to you, as well as the fact that you know what you want and where your heart is. He also doesn’t like to have to read between the lines, so it’s all the better that you give it to him as-is and don’t beat around the bush. 

Now, imagine: Him cooking you a meal with precisely the things you’re used to eating and telling you that he learned the recipe just so he could have something he can make for you regularly. I rest my case. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@lmygoat asked:

“Hellooo I’m sending in my answer for the matchups and congrats on your blog reaching a year old!!

1. HSR

2.gentleman

3. I don’t really know how to describe myself but most of my hobbies are on the creative side like painting and drawing. I guess you can describe me as vocal about my dislikes(can’t think of any rn).I’m really fond of sweets (like really really) and for breakfast I think I ate toast with cream cheese and berries😭

Again congrats on your blog your work is really enjoy to read and I look forward to your future posts<33”

Hiii, honey! Glad to know I’ve been able to deliver, I hope the Anaxa profile is something you’ll like whenever I get that ready. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ JIAOQIU!

The material to work with here is a little bit sparse, but it’s not going to be a problem. You see, the energy of “I don’t really know how to describe myself” needs someone who can read between the lines, and there are few who’d be better for the task than him. You don’t really need to say things with him if you’re finding it difficult to express yourself — he just knows. 

Moreover, regarding the dislikes, I am a firm believer in the fact that Jiaoqiu has the white girl core bitchiness to him where you bond over hating a certain thing. Also, sweets and food in general are obviously a field he excels in, so if you’re craving just about anything, you can trust him to whip it up for you. 

The only unfortunate part of this combo is that he won’t be able to see your drawings and paintings. Ouch. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@chaoticmalleusenjoyer asked:

“Hello I hope you're having a good day Riina! I wanna request the match-up thingy if it's not too much trouble.Fandom is HSR and I would like a gentleman .My hobbies are drawing and swimming. I love animals.I like lazing around and relaxing. I dislike loud places they stress me out fr. I don't have much aura farming from last year but I pull so much bad luck that me being healthy can be considered a flex itself.”

Why hello, I am having a good day, thank you for the well-wishes!

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ DAN HENG!

Okay, plain and simple: No loud stuff, appreciates the fact that you have quiet and relatively easy hobbies where he doesn’t have to worry for you to blow something up, is associated with water = swimming is possible. 

Animals? After whatever the fuck happened with him on Amphoreus, I think it’s safe to say that he has a soft spot for critters, regardless of their size. If it’s natural waters you prefer, he’s more than happy to take you to swim in the Scalegorge Waterscape whenever he makes a trip to the Luofu, and you can be sure that he’s going to join you. 

He’s also the type that makes sure that you stay healthy, as in he grabs you by the back of your shirt when you’re about to trip over a threshold. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@teacup2002 asked:

“hi there riri congrats on your blogs almost 1 year anniversary (i hope i could send you this ask bfr that) hope your life in uni are going well i am currently still doing exams and in a pursuit of doing anything but studying i decided to participate in your matchup event. to make sure this ask wont get too lengthy i will get straight to the point

1. i dont mind either but i would prefer HSR then genshin

2. i am unfortunately a reluctant heterosexual (you dont want to know how bad the dating scene in here in the chindo community, every man is a racist, misogynist, homophobic, basically every bigoted trait there is and i am expected to marry one of them before i turn 27 oml)

3. my hobbies are pretty standard i rlly enjoy gaming and scrolling through social media but that isnt rlly a hobby. I used to draw and read quite often but I have taken a break recently since i just couldn’t get anything done. I am currently pursuing smth is psychology, haven’t decided on what i want to specialize in but im interested on forensics. Im quite fond of quality time but i like being left alone either??? many consider me shallow for this but im rlly into gifts both giving and receiving. the same cant be said for words of affirmation, like I enjoy receiving them but i dont take compliments well let alone telling them. physical touch is another thing i am very iffy abt, I dont particularly mind if someone touches me but i would enjoy it much more if you dont. Im a very sensitive person who dislike going out too much since i just feel bad at every homeless person giving whatever cash i have on me and when i run out i just feel like such a pos for not helping others. all my friends say that i am a very talkative and shameless person whos social battery runs out faster then my stamina (i can not run for more then 30m). im definitely a go with the flow type person; i dont mind schedules but i would prefer absolute freedom to do whatever i want. speaking of it my dream is too graduate school, work super hard and earn as much money as I can and travel around the world after i retire, i know that the current state of the world makes that seem unrealistic but just let me dream abt it. i want to live like any of the satc girls in my 30s particularly samantha she is such a vibe. speaking of rom coms i yearn for that sappy love story that only appears in hollywood but i cringe at the thought of acting lovey dovey with anyone. im honestly a mess of a person so i would appreciate someone who at least knows how to store leftover food. its should be obvious from this entire wall of text that i am an unsure person, but one thing that im 100% sure abt is me not wanting kids. I already know i am going to be one of those parents who is physically there but not emotionally and just dump my child off to a nanny and that is a life no child should experience (the thought of me being pregnant just makes me want to drown).

4. the only thing i could think of rn is when i lost my charger in school and didnt think much of it since i left it there and someone just probably took that. a few months later i saw my charger at the only charging port in the classroom and just snatched that thing off the wall and stole it back. I overheard the guy complaining to his gf abt how he couldn’t find his charger and called the thief broke for stealing but to which the girlfriend responded with “didnt you steal that thing too?” I was fighting back my laughter when i heard that

5. im prepared to get absolutely mogged by whatever drawing you made. I highkey wish my hair looks like that but my chinese hair genes makes me hair flat ash no matter what i do.

remember to take a break once in a while and dont overwork yourself. im currently burnt out from studying and its costing me my grades so pls do whatever makes you happy. if you feel tired from answering all the asks just extend the deadline. i promise you the monster under your bed will not eat your toes if you dont complete this event.”

Aiyaiyai you lowkey highkey clocked me on the schedule part because I am, in fact, in a bit of a hurry with these (currently midway done) because uni hit me with one more curveball of an online course. BUT, if there is one thing I don’t lack, it is pure willpower, and I am getting these to you (almost) on time. Prepare for your drawing to get unmogged. The charger thing took me out, who the fuck steals a charger of all things, like c’mon. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ PRE-AE SUNDAY!

Aight girl hear me out: If it’s a stable and (relatively) composed man you need, there’s only one guy up for the task. We will live in blissful ignorance of the fact that bro is about to be hit by a train. 

Your hobbies are all things that are easy to do with him, and something he can relatively easily participate in, too, if he wishes to. Reading, especially, is something he already does, and you can have those wannabe-dates where both of you just read your own books next to each other. Or, he could read out loud to you — he would. Your field of study of choice is also very apposite here because you sure as hell need some knowledge on psychology to figure him out, especially if yandere. Regarding the love languages, he’s 100% the gift-giving kind, and he’s very tasteful with his touches: You’re going to get all sorts of jewels from him, and the most he’ll grab you is to put a necklace on you if you yourself don’t desire for more. 

He’s a great listener (for perhaps all the wrong reasons), and he quickly gets used to and enjoys the little bursts of energy where you yap all of your verbal storage out to him before the battery is dry. Also, he’s absolutely going to be both the slowing factor in your life as well as the rich husband core you’re maybe dreaming about. 

If anything, he quickly learns your ins and outs and gently guides you away from whatever lowkey risky you might be getting up to, but at the same time, he encourages the good-heartedness you clearly have going on with smartly placed compliments that won’t make you cringe out of your skin. And, if anything, he knows how to store leftover food. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@nadeshikoiraependragon asked:

“Hi! I heard you're doing match-ups and, if it's not too much trouble, I'd like to request one with someone (preferably a man) from HSR, please.

I'm a simple young woman who works in a library. I'm mostly quiet, shy, and extremely polite to strangers or people I don't know very well. But once I trust someone, I'm still mostly calm and the voice of reason. However, if you truly anger me or touch someone I care about, I won't hesitate to let you know what I'm capable of. I can also be very mean, sarcastic, and sharp-tongued, and if I have something to say, I'll say it, even if it's inappropriate or controversial. I'm the kind of person who can drive you crazy in a loving way, and my friends often compare me to Nie Huaisang from MDZS and Joker, the protagonist of Persona 5, in terms of personality. So, could you say I'm a kind of "contained chaos"? I'm not entirely sure about that either. I'm a Gemini, so I see myself as someone with many facets, but extremely loyal and true to myself, and I'll fight tirelessly for what I believe in and want.

My hobbies include embroidery, cooking, reading, watching anime, playing video games, and reading manga. My favorite types of books are fantasy, dark fantasy, and historical. I also love going to museums and exhibitions of all kinds. I'm still a student, but I'd like to study Museology and Museography (Greedy and unlikely, I know perfectly well, but it's my dream.)

As for things I dislike or hate, I have arachnophobia and detest feeling trapped and exposed (Yep, I wouldn't get along with any yandere). I also hate being treated condescendingly and having my abilities doubted; that immediately puts you on my blacklist, and I won't take you off it until you earn it. I'm short and look fragile (160 cm or 5'0" approximately?), and if you make fun of that, you'll immediately get a thumbtack on your chair (metaphorically speaking, of course).

And my greatest aura farming moment this year (and in my entire life so far) was when the mayor's office of a part of my city organized an event for Book Day, and I had to read a story on stage in front of a huge crowd. It's nothing special, but for someone with stage fright like me, it was sublime. I even did a little jump with a "Wa-hoo!" like Mario in backstage.

P.S.: Excuse my bad grammar and any other mistakes; I'm literally using Google Translate.”

You are 100% with the grammar, none of you have to ever apologize for using a translator to send in an ask or read my stuff. Also, never be afraid to chase your dreams: Things in life have a habit of sorting themselves out, and if the dream doesn’t end up being a responsible choice, you can at least say that you tried it. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ DR. RATIO!

He definitely would enjoy a partner who’s on the calmer end, and you seem to match that description quite well. He likes reading, you like reading, he can appreciate good art, so can you. He can’t say he’s that much into any sorts of crafts, but in this case, I would say that opposites strongly attract. Moreover, continuing on the same theme, he’s a very stoic guy, and you’re a little softer, and such puzzle pieces tend to complete each other. 

I imagine you could have deep, lengthy conversations about all sorts of topics varying from your field to his — it’s the sort of a connection made possible by a patient understanding between two people and their differences. Oh, and the sarcastic, dry sort of humour is right up his alley, so if you need a bit of a challenge in seeing who can come up with a wittier remark, he’s a good opponent.

He knows your skill, he doesn’t underestimate you, but he does push you to be the best version of yourself and makes sure that you don’t ever underachieve because of self-doubt. He’s your biggest hype man, in his own way. 

I’m not sure how you feel about books near water, so the bathtimes can either be you and him sitting in the tub and reading, or you having anxiety over him getting the pages wet while he assures you that he has never and never will drop a book in the bath. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

“HELLOOOOOO RIRI!!!!! GUESS WHO THIS IS……..?!

ITS DAISY-ANON AGAIN!! I THINK? LMG I GENUINELY FORGOT WHAT EMOJI WAS MINE BROOO I THINK IT WSS THIS ONE🌼..? BUT ANYWAH I HOPE YOULL REMEMBER ME RIRI!!!!!! OAKAY SOOOOOOO I SAW WERE DOIGN THIS UHH BRO WHAT IS IT FALLED I THINK HSR/GENSHIN MATCH-UPS THINGY AND oh my goodness I’m SO excited to do this!!! Except…. I might be a little slow and I might now what to do UHHHH BUT OK IMMA TRU TO FIGURE IT OUT (MB IF ITLL LOOK SILLU I HAVENO IDEA WHAG IM DOING… I’m always confused!!)

OK SO UHH ID LIKE TO BE APART OF THE HSR FANDOM because……. I LOVE HSR SM and the men in there.. 🤤🤤

OKAY SK MOVING ONTO THE SECOND QUESTION I WILL GOOOO WITHHH… gentleman! Becauseee.. the only lady I would like to get is YOU (smirks very nonchalantly) LOL OKAY ANYWAHSS

THIRD QUESTION. What do I like to do? What sorta person am iiiii??? WELLL SOOO I have so say I’m UHHH LETS SAY JUSR THINK OF ME AS A LAZY CAPYBARA..💔💔 OKK ANYWAY so obviously my hobbies are playing games and reading I love reading SOOOOO MUCHH (not the boring stuff NEVER) anywayhhh AND I HEAVILY DISLIKE BEING EMPLOYED NO JOKE BRO TS SO TIRING but also another thing I dislike veryyy much  IS MEAN PEOPLE BRO they be hurting my feelings and stuff like ok damn broo BUT ANYWYAS And I also like to live my life like uhh SO ITS LITERALLY wake up eat something delicious wash the dishes (just for a tiny bit) then lay on my beautiful glorious bed farm all day on games then sing some songs then watch movies THEN UHH GO OHT FIR A BIT?? I don’t really like going out tbh I HAVE ANXIETH SO ITS KIND OF HARD.. anddd obviously read fanfics I LOVE FANFICS OKK AND ALSO WHAG I ATE FOR BREAKFAST TODAYY? uhhhhhhhh I think boiled eggs with some avocado and tomatoes? I HAVE SUCH A BAD MEMORY PLUS IM ON A DIET SOOO

OKAYY SO the time I farmed the most aura? Heh.. that’s like everyday for me buddy ✌️✌️🤑 BUTTT I was out for a walk and then some strange guy came near me and started hating on me and then suddenly i activated my superpowers and showed him who the real big daddy was here !! (This totally happened no lie)

ANDDDDD FOR TNE LAST ONE.. ILL DO MY BEST TO DRAW even tho I can’t …. ITS GONNA LOOK SO SILLY IM CRYINGG (side note ur drawings are so good BRO TEACH ME UR WAYS SENPAI💔💔) -🌼”

HELLOOOO HONEY I LEFT YOUR NAME OUT SINCE THIS IS AN EMOJI ANON ASK AND I WASN’T SURE IF YOU’D LIKE TO BE TAGGED OR NOT, BUT I HOPE THIS IS ALRIGHT TOO. 

*blushes nonchalantly*. You scare and amaze me at the same time, Daisy. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ JING YUAN!

I know I said earlier that chaotic people might need another chaotic person to match the freak, but I think it is safe to say that in this case, you need a calmer force in your life. Bless. I can’t really think of anyone with a more calming aura. 

A lazy capybara and a sleepy lion. He’s gonna be the person in your life grabbing you by the shoulders and going like “baby. I need you to calm down” in the most loving and respectful way possible. Having him as a yandere would be very convenient because you wouldn’t have to get a job. I think he vastly enjoys the chaotic energy you bring into his life: He’s a man that’s quite set in his ways due to his past, and some pizzazz is a very much welcome addition to his days. 

You don’t need your beautiful glorious bed anymore, he’s going to have to suffice. If you ever want to nap, make sure to tell him beforehand because he can and will join you. You singing? He would go crazy. Not to be dramatic but he would also basically cure your anxiety, like bro is the least anxiety-inducing man I have ever seen. Low cortisol. 

He’s also obviously never mean or snarky; though, you can throw as much banter his way as you want, he’s just going to answer you with a nod and a knowing hum. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@justsleepysomething asked:

“Hiiiiiii!

I am very happy to congratulate you on the first anniversary of your blog. Absolutely every profile or small one-shot was absolute fanfiction. And even if I fundamentally disagreed with your vision, I still savored every part of almost every part of your work, sometimes rereading it several times in a row! Thank you very much for delighting us with your works!

♦️♦️♦️♦️♦️♦️♦️♦️♦️

So, I would also like to participate (for the first time) in a match-up 👉👈

For HSR man pls.

I am studying at the university, majoring in biology. In honor of the successfully passed tests, I decided to finish the 'snake bite' piercing (the first time I was too afraid), but now I'm also thinking about the tongue/eyebrow piercing. And the decision to get piercings was one of the best decisions this year, haha. I am also fond of fan fiction and also write fan fiction, although I am often embarrassed and have little faith in words when people praise me for my syllable and rich vocabulary.

By the way, in your darling test I was a feisty/shrewd darling.

And about the aura. You know, when I was still in early middle school, I realized how beneficial the reputation and aura of a good girl are, both at school and in the family. But do you know how pleasant it was to destroy this image in the eyes of the family? Grandmothers, aunts, relatives were horrified by the piercings, but God, I can't express in words the pleasure I felt from their disgust, hostility, inner struggle and shame when I shut up their unsolicited opinion. Is it malicious? Yes. Do I regret it? No, lol.

♦️♦️♦️♦️♦️♦️♦️♦️

Once again, all the best to you, I am immensely glad that once I stumbled upon your work. Be happy and healthy!”

Miss Girl sent me off with the Dr. Mike intro. I think the most flattering compliment I could get from you people is you rereading old works of mine, it’s so unbelievable to think that some text I’ve written has left a big enough of an impact on a person for them to want to return to it later. Thank you very much for reading, you’re the reason I keep publishing this stuff to the internet 🥹🥹 I’m also very much honoured to be the one to take your match-up virginity. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ AVENTURINE!

He knows just about zero things about biology, but oh boy, now that he has you, he’s very excited to learn if you know what I mean. 

He has always been one who wants to shock, and I think the subtle mischievousness you have going on is insanely attractive to him. However, you also appear to have a softer, a little more timid side that allows him to open up a bit. It’s just the good girl that fell for the bad dude sort of a scenario on paper, but with time, the qualities balance each other out, and the relationship doesn’t end up being a hurricane like one could fear with him. 

He’s fantastic at picking just the right words to say when you’re doubting your abilities, regarding writing or not, but you’re going to have to weather him doing it in a very cheeky, teasing way. Worry not, though, he’s both prepared to tone it down or get hit with a response tenfold as sassy — whatever you’re feeling like. 

And you know what he would do? He would get you some pretty bling-bling pieces of jewelry for the fresh snakebites. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@ghost-teapiika asked:

“Hello!! this is for your match-ups event :DD happy (late) one year anniversary of your Tumblr account 🎉🎉🎉🎉

Genshin is preferred (im more familiar with it) but I wouldn’t mind getting a match-up w/ someone from Honkai too (only if u have the time!!!) (I wanna get into HSR but I havent found a reason too yet…..) 

Any gender works for me :]]

I’m genderfluid (any pronouns), I’m comically short (4’11) and dress like a stereotypical gay art kid. I love to draw fanart + comics of whatever im hyperfixated on, it’s literally all I do when I’m not studying lmao. On that note, I’m currently studying to become a teacher!! Uuuuuuuhm…. Im trying to think of other facts about myself… I get sleepy very easily, if I were an animal I’d either be a cat or a raccoon, I love to collect plushies (character nuis my beloveds TT) and charms (I decorate all my stuff w/ them). Personality wise- i tend to be very quiet until I am more comfy w/ people, my love language is affectionate teasing/making fun of my friends and i am dense to any and all romance irl 

I fear I have never farmed aura in my life. I look like a cat who WILL run if chased on account of the anxiety. Something silly that happened to me earlier this year is that someone asked me if I was dating my childhood best friend (we’ve known each other for 10+ years) and without a moment’s hesitation I said “No, I hate her. No one ever makes me as mad as she does” lol. 

I hope this works for the drawing thing!!

Thank you for your hard work!! Take ur time and have a good rest of your day/night op ^—^ (@mocha-ghoooul)”

*clutches pearls* BLUE HAIR AND PRONOUNS

I think I saw you mention somewhere that you don’t know much about the games in general, so this is a prime time to go on a googling spree about HSR, especially. Welcome to my blog, by all means. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ VENTI!

A comically short gay art kid deserves a comically short wind god on their side. 

I think it’s the teacher part, especially, that sparks the match here: To be a teacher, you need at least a bit of a caring heart, and I think Venti compliments both the lowkey chaotic and witty part of you as well as the more responsible aspects of your personality. 

He’s very much into the teasing thing, both verbally and physically. Like, I would imagine he’s absolutely the type to blow in your ear just to see you squirm before he laughs it off and gives you a few pats on the head and tucks your hair behind your ear. 

Consider 1: Getting to nap on him on the grassy fields of Mondstadt while he plays his lyre. Consider 2: Him getting you (or making you!) all sorts of little trinkets out of whatever he can find, like flowers and bottle caps from his drunken activities. Consider 3: Him coming behind you when you’re drawing, going hmmm with a thoughtful look on his face, and giving you the most beautiful, poetic compliment on it. Aiya. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@loppy172 asked:

“Hi riri, I saw your match-up post and wanted to participate. I hope you're having a great day/night!

1: I'd prefer HSR (^-^)👍

2: Gentlemen, please <3

3: I'm pretty quiet unless I'm around people I know well, I can be a bit sensitive and I don't really take things seriously most of the time I can also be a bit over apologetic which im trying to work on (T_T)  I work as a barista in a cafe/tcg shop for hobbies I play piano and cook! I enjoy traveling(im very excited to leave my home country for the first time this summer for my 19th!)  music and rainy days. I dislike olives, cottage cheese, and yelling. I live life day by day and am currently saving up for college even though im not entirely sure what i want to study, likely business, marine biology, or music, maybe all 3!(^.^)

4: idk if this counts as aura but I learned smooth operator on piano and played it on stage for a recital and I got a lot of compliments

( ´∀｀ )b

5. Pls forgive my horrendous art skills (T_T)”

Hello, darling!! Best of luck in finding the field you want to study, all three options sound super interesting, and I wish you a very exciting time when you get to go abroad (ㅅ´ ˘ `) 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ AE-SUNDAY!

If it isn’t the piano that drove me into this choice. 

No, but music is a holy thing to him, and you being able to speak in that same language is an incredibly attractive thing to him — like he can’t believe how hard he falls despite considering himself to be a composed person. Also, emotional sensitivity, something he has always struggled with to a degree, is something he appreciates in you. It’s probably initially what opens the connection between the two of you. 

It’s the sort of a serene companionship where you can just walk around and hold hands, or sit next to each other without saying a word and be content. Or, you can chat with him: Calm conversations about this and that are something he vastly enjoys with you. The one thing I would be worried about is the two of you ending up in a so-called I’m-sorry-spiral where both of you just apologize to each other over tiny matters, but I also think the I-can-fix-them is great here. I also lowkey have an inkling that he might hate cottage cheese as well. 

BIG consider: Playing the piano with him while sitting either side by side or in his lap. He would combust methinks

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

“Hellooooooo miss Rinaaaa!! I've actually been following you for while (since your first "Moments of weakness"..?) but I was too shy too interact!! I still am now but I really wanted to join the event and interact with you ahh!!

No more yapping here's my entry:

1, HSR since I kinda like them more.. though I looove Alhaitham and is quite curious about our compatibility, I am much familiar with HSR casts!

2, One gentleman please <33

3,

What I like to do all day is drawing, gaming and doom scrolling. I'm not a very active person, and I like to be inside more because my social battery depletes quickly when I socialize.. And my mbti is INFJ if that helps with anything..

Currently I am freshman in college, my major is education and I'm studying to be an English teacher in my country teehee.. I'm really shy, but thinking about teaching the young generations gives me a sense of purpose in a way you know? My life is quite dull, sometimes feels stagnant but I quite like it. I don't really like change, I like some form of predictably so I can expect things out of it.. It comforts me very much, but sometimes good surprises like getting a gift or seeing my favorite sandwich stall open up again.. and especially when my favorite blogger uploads another masterpiece ;3.

Sometimes I'll be busy hyperfixating on my favorite characters or animals (bunny..) or whatever!! Like right now Ashveil is on my mind 24/7!! He still can't beat my all time favorite Alhaitham though..They take my mind off the stress I've had this year.. And I turn into a hyperactive maniac when I hyperfixate.. like I turn into an extrovert and terrorize my introverted friends.. (Watch out people)..

4, My most aura farming moments.. ? Ough.. I'm a full time loser with 0 contribution to society.. But I think it's when I got my IELTS score and when I won first place in a contest.. I felt so good for so little time.. and then I felt normal again so uhh yeah just some minor academic achievements :)

5, Okay so imagine a seal.. (I can't draw for life I'm sorry!) I hope I'm qualified to get a match haha, looking forward to seeing your work again!!”

No babe I’m drawing you a seal. You’re currently in my drawing notes as “seal”. Am I imagining things or am I being flattered <( ⸝⸝•̀ - •́⸝⸝)>

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ ASHVEIL!

Okay in my humble defence I was already thinking of Ashveil before you said you liked him. I think this is a perfect result for the both of us.

You know, in a way, he has had his fair share of experience in aiding the youth in their growth, albeit to a bit of a different purpose than pure education. The sense of purpose in that regard is very much something he relates to and finds quite enthralling in you, I would argue. 

He’s also mostly an inside person aside from his work, and he appreciates the quiet and idyllic moments above all, so the stagnant life you speak of is probably a dream come true for him. He doesn’t mind the slowness at all — in fact, he quite likes it. You can spend your time gaming and doomscrolling together; that’s what a good lot of people in Planarcadia tend to do, anyway, and it’s very calming for him, too. You can rest in between his legs on the (fuckass cheap) couch in the office while leisurely watching reels and whatnot. Or, he can watch you draw while you chat about something mundane. 

He’s also good with surprises, as far as the budget allows him to be. One of his favourite things ever is seeing your face when you see the takeout he has ordered for you, or more often, when he sneaks up behind you and lifts you up into the air with a hearty laugh. 

And, he’s also very much up for a yappaton 3000 if you’re feeling like it. The guy has a LOT to say when he gets into it. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

“hi, i hope you are well. it is me. 🌸 this time i am off anonymous, because i made my own drawing (but i actually hope you could keep my name anonymous, i will, hopefully, find the response either way). i hope it is alright… your minimum is my maximum. i spent hours on it (ten minutes). i tried to copy how you drew yours. xD cause at one point it looked like a chip, cause i made the body too oval. the flower is for you, i realize now that it is similar to my emoji. xD

anyways, i hope i can get any character from hsr. my hobbies include things such as graphic design, and i enjoy sports that include weapon things. like archery, or kendo, or fencing, and etc. i also like strategy games like chess. and my studies are in mathematics, and my plan is law school. i also enjoy studying foreign cultures and languages, and politics. i know many languages, and consider myself good at learning mathematics. and i enjoy playing many games, specifically story based visual novels. my favorites are in horror, or horror-esque games. i also like reading. though honestly, i am a very lazy in a way too. i can get things done when needed, but only at end time… it only takes a minute to do if you leave a minute to do it. i guess it is more akin to procrastination. and, when i farmed the most aura… i cannot think of anything because my whole existence is auraful (am i funny). i'm not sure. if it counts, i took the wrong bus once, since i usually don't take public transport, and ended up on the other side of the city for a good few hours. the aura part is that i was able to not cry, even after i asked a lady on the bus for help and she looked at me weird. this is the closest i have gotten to aura farming. so you can guess how far i actually am, i'm going to have to think long and hard about the last time i aura farmed. does winning my 5050 four times in a row count? i was keeping this to myself actually because i didn't want to jinx it, but i'll say it today. well, also, i think the reason i can't think of anything is also because i try not to feel embarrassment, and in return i also can't farm aura… it's like you need to feel sad to feel happy. you know. (coping). “

I’ve got you, Blossom, your identity is safe with me. I will cherish the flower as seen in the picture. You have a whole lot of super interesting hobbies, I think that grants you at least 300 aura points. I’ve always wanted to dabble into self-defence like taekwondo, I think I’m going to start this summer ( ˶˘ ³˘)♡

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ BLADE!

Alrighty alrighty hear me out, this is a non-yandere version because I cannot, with a good conscience, match anyone up with the yandere one, good god. 

ANYHOW, first and foremost: The weapon thing. Do you think that a former weapon smith such as himself wouldn’t immediately be drawn to someone who is interested in such sports? You could probably get his dead heart beating again. 

He’s also appreciative of the calm aura you exude, as well as the kindness and little sensitivity you have to you. Your attentiveness and thoughtfulness are things that bring out his softer side (it exists!!), and after the rocky patch of however the hell you’re going to get close to him, he’s actually really tender with you. Sure, he still isn’t a man of many words, and some of the things he says are a little on the gruff side, but at the end of the day, you’re his soft spot.

I also think that he’d actually be really interested in things like chess. I know for a fact that Jing Yuan’s sorry ass forced him to play with him back in the day, and I have a hunch that he’s actually pretty good at math, so that’s something you can bond over and even explain to him. And you like horror? Baby who could possibly be a better match for you than him. Moreover, he’d have HUGE respect for someone who’s pursuing the law as a field. 

Sidepoint, but I reckon that he would find your sense of humour especially endearing. You know, he doesn’t really laugh at anything, and the jokes that come out of his mouth are mostly death-related and not very funny because of that, but I would bet that some cute little witty remarks you send his way every now and then could have the corners of his mouth turning up. You’re genuinely so fucking cute Blossom I am actually ready to throw hands at anyone who is mean to you

You should’ve said the word blade in the weapon part of the ask so I could’ve been like HAHA BLADE and continue the braindeadness from the other match-ups. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@celestialdev asked:

“hai there!! id like a match up from hsr please! preferably a gentleman.

I’d say im the type of person who is more reserved until im like super close with someone and im also an introvert. my hobbies include drawing, playing games (obvi), and chatting with my friends ! im fond of gambling away my savings in gacha games, being spoiled, and cats. wow ok idk what else to write. i had pancakes for breakfast today if that helps.

the moment i aura farmed the most this year was prolly when a ball was flying towards me and my friend, and i caught it with one hand and threw it back without looking because im just like that.

now heres a shitty drawing of myself !! thank you sm!”

Lmao have you seen the Korean guy on Tiktok or reels who goes like “Are you okay? You’re welcome ( ◠‿◠ )” at jumpscare clips? That’s you. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ AVENTURINE!

Now, now, gacha, cats and spoiling should be the dead giveaway here: He has the money, he has the gacha luck, and he has the cats as has been proven in that one trailer. You best believe that he’s going to get you anything and everything you could possibly want. 

Moreover, I suppose this is a case where an extrovert and an introvert hit it off: He is, to an extent a social person (or at least very talented at it), but he feels like he can relax with you when it comes to that since he doesn’t have to put a show on for anyone. Chatting with you is recharging his social battery even if he’s actively being with someone — you’re just like that. 

You can catch Acheron’s sword when it flies his way. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@chryseis-lxve asked:

“CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR BLOG TURNING AN YEAR OLD, RIINA!! 🌟

genuinely, i enjoy every single one of your works it's INSANE, esp the personality you give to the characters! like i've read the profiles of, and fawned over chars who i don't even adore that much or frankly find annoying (side eyes aventurine) simply bcs of the characterization you offered them! the special points section especially, just love reading and re-reading them sometimes XD tysm for sharing your talent, energy and efforts with us 💖

i would also please please PLEASE like to participate in your match-up event! XD (on this note, who would you match YOURSELF up with? 🤔)

fandom: hsr

the men only, please

for personality, here we go:

i. extremely non-caring attitude. my trademark, atp. i forgive quickly, i move on quickly, i forget quickly, and don't even bat an eyelash during the entire thing. i just... kind of don't care. like you can literally half-kill me and if you have good enough reason, i'll probably forgive you and if i care for you, i'll probably ask if you'd like help finishing the job. it's not malicious, it's not tiredness; it's practicality, and sometimes, contempt wrapped in resignation.

i have realized with age and experience that i am more acutely aware of myself and have a far greater ability to be able to see myself from an entirely detached third person pov than people usually do. so it makes me much better at accommodating and understanding than people usually are; naturally, the more intelligent person concedes. i believe people don't really change, so the best approach is to cut the worst people out before they turn into tumors, quietly weather the worst qualities of your loved ones and wait out the irritating people who you have to stick with for institutional purposes.

yuck.

ii. beauty is my go-to escapade. pretty much self explanatory; i mentioned my general hyper-awareness that usually leads to depression, so i cure it by cultivating beauty. my #1 favourite is painting, watercolour, acrylic, anything.

but it's not limited to just that it's also about art, writing, painting, sketching, music, dance, sculpting, mosaics, ivy, marble, sunlight, petrichor, dandelions, anything and everything. when i'm in a romantic enough mood, i'll even allow myself to notice the beauty of other people.

iii. my appearance / smile are... very sunny. like fr 😭 when i'm neutral / srs, i appear to be the distinguished guest of the room and nobody even dares to approach me but the moment i smile, it's such a bright, full-face thing that my eyes crinkle, dimples appear, literally it's a bit pathetic. also i smile very often, i just like smiling / laughing in general XD lmao, if you met me irl, you'd be shocked if i ever told you about the first point, bcs i don't look like i think THAT negatively or passively at all.

iv. genius at deception / lying / manipulating / persuading. rarely in a negative sense, tho often times unintentionally, i end up sucking other people's profits for myself 😭 frankly, if you do smth bad and i decide that i care enough to come after your ass, you'll never see it coming. no, i'm not exaggerating. yes, i know exactly when and where to strike.

v. very chill overall. self-explanatory. if you're not being a general nuisance, creating too much noise, or causing me sensory discomfort in general, we're good. i HATE unnecessary noise, excessive lights or sparkle, wet clothes etc. if you're not doing these, we're good.

vi. think / act very quickly and have tons of ideas always. i'm THE person to come to when you need practical advice; i don't care about being right, idc about being the best in the room. you have this problem? here, have five different solutions, and here, have my explanation on the nuances and ifs and buts of taking every single one of them. on that note, i also hate unnecessary dramatics. i can't stand ranting or yapping beyond a certain point bcs it's like, do you want a solution or not?? and if you don't, then find smth more relaxing / happy to talk about, no??

vii. sarcastic. my legal name is literally 'sss' and the middle one's written as just s, but it might as well stand for sarcastic now. it's my way of venting out frustration when it's getting excessive. tho it's usually in a funny way; i try not to hurt people.

viii. i... had an extremely absent father, who was present in my life only in presence and an extremely overbearing mother who protected me, taught me how to live, shaped my personality deeply, and is both the person i've loved most and hated most. it's complicated.

ix. i'm also very loyal to my family. like family over everything, imo this makes it a little harder to fall in love with any one bcs ik with full awareness that i'd pick my family over anyone else any day.

x. i struggle a little with finding myself as human as others, or as open as others. idk, weird fixation with scrubbing my skin raw, personality raw, soul raw until it's all perfect. i CANNOT stand humiliation and immediately freeze up and even cry when it gets bad enough.

xi. have exactly one fuck per day left to give- and, oh, guess the one for today flew away. sorry.

xii. i go from 100 to 0 to 100 in the blink of an eye. this is me at all times, essentially.

anyway, do have a moodboard that describes my energy smh since i can't possibly sum up my entire personality without writing a 10k word article.

AHHH I ENJOYED DESCRIBING MYSELF LIKE THIS SM LMAO, THANKS FOR GIVING ME THE CHANCE RIINA!! also, pls, sincerely- i used to be a writer once and did this kind of event too, so pls!! i'm begging you, do give us a personality analysis thing for yourself too!! i wanna put in my thoughts, too!!

i tried to make this as concise and organized as possible, so i'm very sorry if anything ends up giving you a headache 😭 thank you so much for your time and efforts!! LOVE YOU!! 💖🌟 *explodes*”

“WAIT I'M SO SORRY I FORGOT THE FOURTH ONE 😭😭

aura farmed in the last year.... like, there's nothing in particular? 😭

ig one thing that's been happening a lot though is that my sense of style and fashion as well as my suggestions regarding people's relationships have been 100% accurate. and people first revolt like, no, you're wrong and then come back half an hour later like, 'could you please make another suggestion?' 😭🤦‍♀️

essentially, i'm right way too often nowadays 🤷‍♀️

that aside, there's really nothing lmao, i, for the life of me, cannot aura farm 😭🤦‍♀️

AGAIN, SO SORRY FOR THE INCONVENIENCE CAUSED HERE!!”

I think Aventurine still holds the spot of the freakiest profile up to date, albeit that might change when I get Anaxa’s done. If you’re not a shrewd darling then I don’t know what you are. 

Why thank you for the well-wishes, I have had an absolute blast with you. I think the only thing I regret about the past year is not talking to you people more. I've wanted to do something like this for so long but had a diabolical nagging fear that it wouldn’t be good or interesting enough, and I am so overwhelmingly glad to have been proven wrong ( ˘͈ ᵕ ˘͈♡)

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ PRE-AE SUNDAY!

Music? Already thinking of Sunny. Everything else? Even Sunnier. And the attitude? Must be Pre-AE.

I think that in this case, the combo of perfectionist + perfectionist isn’t as destructive as some say it could be. Especially if it’s your mission to make sure that things are as perfect as they could be regarding yourself, it’s something he very much relate to, and I’ve found that when two people of that type meet, they usually end up not fuelling each other in it but actually soothing each other down; That’s what happens with the two of you. Like, when he has been up for 2h too late preparing some papers, you can go serve him the zero-fucks attitude and pull him away from it, and when you’ve been trying to get that one singular piece of your painting right without succeeding, he can come give you a very well-placed compliment and a subtle suggestion that perhaps, this much is enough.

He has a sharp tongue and behind the scenes he’s throwing witty remarks in every direction — when you’re both in a more relaxed mood, your go-to communication is just sarcasm thrown all around the house. He vastly enjoys getting to let loose with you in that way. Then, since he himself is not the type to openly laugh or smile, seeing you be so open with your expressions pretty much melts his heart. 

Moreover, if it’s even a little bit on the side of yandere that we’re going, you won’t have a more valuable asset than being a little cunning. He’s a mindfucking bitch in that role, so if you’ve got some sagacity to you, it’s going to help you. Moreover, I would argue that he’s actually a part of the ragebaiter club (only very subtle about it), and the chill attitude is probably going to prove to be a beneficial quality. 

You say your smile is SUNNY. SUNNY. Sunday. Sunny. Sunday. The detective agenda continues. Also, you’re very loyal to your family. Family. Oak Family. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@sylvierene asked: 

“hiya riri! i honestly can't believe ive been reading your amazing writing for a year! you always manage to get into the nook and crannies of the characters you write, and i love how you portray their thought processes. it somehow makes the yandere hit harder! with that in mind, here's a match-up request :D

Which fandom (Genshin or HSR)? HSR, please!

Would you like a lady or a gentleman or will either do? Hm, I don't mind either. Just please no Ratio or I'll cry

What do you like to do, what sort of a person are you? This is a free-form: You can tell me about your hobbies, about your studies, your work, what you're fond of, what you heavily dislike, how you like to live your life, what you ate for breakfast today, that sort of thing. Whatever you're comfortable revealing to me and to the others that might be reading it along with the answer! Okay, I would say I'm a pretty extroverted, confident person. I'm not afraid to say what I think, and I like to read up on things in order to collect the most knowledge possible. My best friend calls me a "knowledge hoarder," and honestly I agree with that assessment. I love learning things and in my free time enjoy reading a lot. I also love sharing things! In school, I was definitely that kid that got told to study teaching lolol. But I've started my LLB, mainly because I just didn't have the patience to deal with teaching bureaucracy  in my country haha. Also I am very disorganised, I need at least 10 different reminders on my phone, notion and planner to do something, and as a teacher's daughter, I know all too well how much organisation and discipline that career needs. I did however work as a tutor for a bit! It was...a lot, but worth it in the end despite the horrendous pay. I think that's another big thing about me; I'm really strong about my morals. If I believe something, I believe it with my whole heart. For example, I always look up if a beauty company I'm buy from uses animal testing or not because personally,  that's something I care about deeply! Again, my friends often tease me, but it's what I believe in so I'll stick to being a dweeb 𐔌՞ ܸ.ˬ.ܸ՞𐦯 In terms of aesthetics...I love everything a bit classy, a bit formal. Y'know the whole Carolyn Besette-Kennedy trend that was viral for a bit?? I dress like that blended with a typical shoujo anime heroine look. Turtlenecks, highnecks, trenchcoats, mary jane shoes, low rise jeans, Uniqlo, pink accessories, mild gyaru-type makeup. The way I look is very important to me! Also, hair--- mine reaches to my hipbone and I am very proud of it because it takes a century to manage. It's all worth it tho for the aesthetic. In terms of how I appear, I get the two extremes; from fellow extroverts, I seem friendly, but to introverts, I am apparently incredibly intimidating. My friend chalks it up to me being confident enough to say what I think, and that tends to either lure people in or make them afraid. Either way, I don't mind, because once you talk to mind you find that I'm a pretty cheerful, upbeat, optimistic person (˶ˆᗜˆ˵) Hobbies: I like knitting, writing, reading, and playing video games! Obviously love Star Rail, but I enjoy indie games like Mouthwashing, and visual novels like Ace Attorney! The game I've been playing the most recently is the best of two worlds, XOXO Droplets!  Oh, and my favourite books are Almond blossoms and beyond by Mahmoud Dariwsh and Madonna in a fur coat by Sabahattin Ali.

Describe the moment you farmed the most aura in the past year. Like flex on me the hardest you possibly can. I had to think for this one, but I think it was when someone recognised me for a video I did with the state government in my country as a part of a special program I did with them! That really boosted my ego, especially when they complimented me for being well-spoken.

And lastly, a sidequest that you can either do or not do, attach a shitty Paint-drawn portrait of yourself in the ask, and I will complete the drawing with your match! Emphasis on shitty, I don't accept masterpieces, it'll give me performance anxiety. I did this with my mousepad five seconds before, so forgive me in advance:

yeah, that's a rough depiction of what I look like.

Thank you if you decide to do this, and happy one year anniversary! I hope there are many, many happy returns of the day. ( ´ ∀ )ノ～”

Resisting the immediate urge to assign you with Ratio. The confidence is inspiring, honey, keep it up. I’ve found that way too many young adults are struggling with their self-esteem which in turn weighs them down and sends them even deeper into the spiral, so I want you to know that you’re doing very well and are on the right path, if anything. 

I also happen to be a teacher’s daughter. It's truly another reality to see what goes on  behind the scenes and how much extra work teachers have to do, but I’m also very proud of having a parent with such a profession because I have a huge respect for it. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ ANAXA!

The one thing you need, for starters, to be with Anaxa is confidence, and you’re not lacking in that regard. He himself is very self-assured both in his knowledge and his opinions, and he requires his partner to match those qualities. Moreover, the pursuit in learning more and more about whatever is something that he goes crazy about in a person, so you’re basically one of the few people that could actually handle him, I’d argue. Plus, he’s technically a teacher, too. 

Moreover, a strong moral compass is something that attracts him to you, too: For one, he’s dead set on believing in what he has deemed to be right. Of course, he’s ready to argue all of those points, and if there’s something you disagree on, he would be more than happy to debate you — all in the name of mutual understanding, obviously. Your mere existence is something that stimulates his mind, and if you allow him to, he’s going to want to spend hours with you just chatting away. 

I also think you’d complement his occasionally soul-sucking realism with your optimism. He cannot, for the life of him, let go of science and whatever theories he’s cooking up, so having someone that can at least momentarily bring him out of that bubble and get him to go take a chill pill and some tea is going to be very good for him. And, vice versa, his pragmatic views can open new things for you to ponder about. 

Oh, and promise me that the first thing you do for him is fix his fuckass fashion sense. He simultaneously cares for and doesn’t give a shit about his appearance, so the one (arguably very valuable thing in this case) thing no one else in his life could bring him is the appreciation for aesthetics. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@cerebralinvader asked:

“1. hsr please!!

2. either would do! i have no preference hehe

3. okay this part is gonna be loooong (idk if you’ll be responding directly to the ask or in a separate post, but if you get the chance i wouldn’t mind if you didn’t copy this whole rambling more than what’s needed for context lolz) I WROTE THIS IN ONE SITTING ON MY NOTES APP EXPECT NOTHING OF MY SPELLINV AND GRANMAR + it might be hella cringe

in terms of hobbies i spend a ton of my time watching anime, playing video games, reading— like i can kinda get caught up in stuff and forget to leave my room/go outside often enough 😭😭 (though im very much NOT a shy person, like i completely lack any amount of shame that i probably could benefit from, but im usually good enough with people that it works out ) this also results in me forgetting to drink water or eat im ngl just cause i can kinda tune out my own physical experiences in favor of whatever im caught up with

i love drawing, acting, and writing (though the latter is mostly self indulgent fanfics with some poetry sprinkled in once in a while) i LOVE debating and i HATTEE people trying to boss me around like everytime i hear a “because i say so” or “im in charge” im insta-digging  my heels in the ground just on principle

i don’t mind admitting when i actually am wrong, but i do always argue when i think im not

i love learning and researching/collecting info on topics i enjoy: esp psychology, philosophy, and human biology (idk what it is about humans but i gen just love the very concept of them they’re all SO interesting)

i have a pretty easy time putting my biases aside and trying to understand how other people are feeling and/or their thought processes— even if i REALLY don’t agree with them, but i also struggle with treating my own emotions as important, i often brush them aside for what i consider a more “logical” route, (and somehow i’m surprised every time refusing to acknowledge emotions doesn’t get rid of them)

i lie a LOT and almost never to actually get something, it’s genuinely just for fun. i like seeing how much i can trick people and i usually do admit it as lying within like a few minutes— mostly because im very very good at it. i do really love teasing and messing my friends,  i think their reactions are just hilarious whether they’re flustered or scared or mad or whatever, tbh even sometimes when they stare at me blankly i’ll start laughing at that too(which sometimes just leads to uncontrollable fits of laughter it’s so bad). i can handle being messed with back, but anytime someone genuinely starts being really kind i get very flustered.  i often get bored of any specific demeanor so every few hours to like a day or so i might end up switching around my tone/behavior etc to a different vibe

i LOVEEEE to yap about stuff that i like, though i will need someone to engage somewhat, i can’t really talk with a wall, but i wanna be able to share the things i obsess over with people (my strange version of gifting with “this thing makes me happy” ➔ “please look at this thing to be happy too”) im generally very apprehensive about physical touch until im close with someone, then i get pretty clingy physically

i have a huge sweet tooth and i hate vegetables , i love almost anything that’s cute or creepy (i have a soft spot for things like rats or snakes that many find gross) and i love horror— i have terrible motivation for anything i don’t feel like doing, i complain a lot about inconveniences and get bored crazy easy, which i will do anything to avoid i seriously cant stand boredom i will take any other feeling or emotion over being bored

i can handle high amounts of pain very easily (like getting stabbed or burnt) but mild discomfort will END me (tummy aches), when i do get too upset i tend to kinda shut down, i get quiet and unresponsive and just kinda lay there im ngl— i love small dark spaces when im stressed

my sleep schedule is CRAZY inconsistent like i get a random number generator over a period of 48 hours for how many hours i get, and then another for how many chunks its split into— on average i get 2-5 hours a night and i take naps, but i have slept for over 13 hours straight before— sometimes i go to bed at 10pm or 2am(most often) or 9am it’s really completely inconsistent

OKAY THATS ALL I CAN THINK OF I HOPE THIS WAS GOOD???

4. i’m ngl i cant think of anything but when I heard a teacher had brought up my name in a discussion I wasn’t present for to call a point I had made incorrect– I returned the next day with a document I put together containing explanations for all my claims  as well as sources, which I handed out to the class and presented to them. (it was on absurdism and albert camu)

5.  (ps thank you so much for doing this i love your works im so freaking excited…)”

All they know is McDonald’s, charge they phone, twerk, be bisexual, eat hot chip & lie. I must say, I love this ask: Full of personality and quirks, and the picture tops it off. Now, if you do not like this match-up, be prepared to argue because I am RIGHT and you are WRONG 🎣🎣🎣

I diagnose you with… 

ᯓ★ MR. RECA!

I’m pretty sure that in this case, you need a person who can be both calm and reassuring and the slowing force with their presence, but who can also outfreak you if need be. The latter, especially; he can outfreak you and he can outfreak you hard. 

Acting? Acting? Babe be for real, it’s you for Reca or then it’s nobody. The energy is all over you: A yapper, a strong-willed and confident personality, cunning and playful in nature, someone who takes no shit, sometimes struggling with expressing their own emotions in favour of keeping up the looks — this is like a textbook partner for him. 

The conversations go insane with him. He’s knowledgeable on quite many topics, even more the ones you mentioned since both of his professions require some familiarity with how the human mind and body work, so expect to have your thoughts returned to you tenfold. He himself is someone who needs his psyche (and delulu) to be fed with intriguing concepts and controversial topics, and I think you’d do fantastic in offering him those. 

Oh, and this might be an unpopular opinion but I think he also has a very calm and empathetic side. He’s very much able to sit down and converse about feelings with you, and I think he’d be the driving force in getting you to express the emotions that you might have trouble putting into words or permitting to be shown. Just consider: You saying something to him that he sees right through, him raising his brows and saying “Now, is that what you really think, Dear?”. He’s going to keep you on your toes, and you’ll fucking love that shit.

On the yandere side, the ability to shamelessly lie is highkey something you would need. Not a lot of people would have the guts to spit fake info in his face, but as long as you keep the energy up (and he doesn’t end up using the Memokeeper hax), you’re bound to succeed at some point. I’m afraid you won’t be able to get even close to outfreaking the yan version, but you’d put up a good fight, at least, I imagine. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@xjpie68a4ske9su asked:

“waugh I don't really bother with posting and stuff cuz this is my super secret alt acc but I promise I'm real!!!! I swear!!!!!!!

HSR girlie

I prefer my men gentle so true

I'm so serious I don't know how to begin this uhh for breakfast I had banana pancakes and despite being 18 I'm still going to highschool. It's just a situation y'know? I'm not really good with talking to people and my current situation makes it rlly hard to communicate—what with the fact that I've only moved to this new country two years ago. I like drawing and writing and playing? I would like to lie to you and say that I am full of whimsy but lowk I think I'm just full of quiet rage. I'm so sorry this feels like I'm over sharing even if it was the entire point of it ;;; have I mentioned that I'm full of anxiety

I think it technically counts but I've succeeded in making all my male classmates scared of me. They will never approach me and it's all part of the plan >:)

!!!

happy anniversary riri!!! I think. YAAAYYYY!!!!!!!!”

So true, bestie. Godspeed on finding your way in a new country, two years is simultaneously a very long and a very short time to have spent in a completely foreign environment. It’ll all sort itself out with time — I believe in you, dear keyboard smash account. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ JIAOQIU!

The good thing about being with him is that he can drive the social situations and you don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to. He’s also a naturally calming presence with his fan that very calmly lights on fire every now and then, and I think it’s safe to say that he would be good for whatever anxiety you might be going through.

I am also a firm believer in the fact that he has that whimsy in him, bro is a foxian after all. I think he could bring out that more whimsy side out from you, and then the energy emitted would stick to him too. Same thing as with the previous Jiaoqiu match, the one unfortunate thing about this pairing is that he won’t be able to see your drawings, but minor details, minor details. 

And he’s also very gentle of a man. So true. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@livvylol1 asked:

“HSR

Either would do~ (・∀・)

3. I love to read & write as a hobby. ^^ I like to play tons of video games too. I am in a mathematics major, it’s pretty easy in terms of the workloads, except for the analysis classes. It WILL beat plus spank you up, down, and sideways. For what I heavily dislike is physical touch, I hate. HATE it. I do not like getting hugged by most people. ( •̀ ᴖ •́ ) If you wanna know what sort of person I am, I’m a lone wolf type.

4.. I was thrown into a random group for a project, I carried that whole group completely. I think we’ve received the highest score on that one project.ᕙ( ˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ )ᕗ ✧

And here’s a lil silly portrait of me for the side quest <333”

Baby you looked so cold only in your underwear that I gave you a fire fit. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ RUAN MEI!

An academic person requires another academic person on their side. Ruan Mei is nothing if not knowledge-oriented, and I think maths is 100% the thing that ends up connecting the two of you. Listen, I shall paint a picture on your mindscape and say that this has insane slow burn colleague potential. The slow burn part mostly comes from the fact that she has a bit of a hard time recognizing her own emotions, but after she handles that part, she’ll rizz you up good. Considah: You trying to solve a math problem and her coming to help you, and she calmly explains everything to you in her ASMR-ass voice before dropping a “good job” at the end of it. 

She’s also someone who doesn’t like physical contact that much, so you’ll match perfectly on that part, too. Sure, there can be some tasteful touches here and there (she has unnecessarily nice hands), like a brush on your shoulder or your hair, but that’s the extent of it. Both of you also need your own time, so you won’t ever have to fear for your you-time to be invaded. 

I must say, the word wolf jumped in my eyes, but then I read the physical touch part, so Ashveil was out of the option list. I was also thinking of Ratio but then I thought that your picture looked a little bit too gentle and cute for his emotionless ass, and I settled on a bit of a kinder genius. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

“Hello hello Riri!! Really excited for this event, and happy 1 year anniversary ahhh!! Feels like it's yesterday when I found your blog!!

Anywayyyyyyy, my entry ;)

1, Genshin! (Lowk manifesting Alhaitham, the one and only feeble scholar)

2, One Hoyoverse tailored man!

3, I like drawing, gaming and reading!! At the moment I just finished my final semester so woohoo summer holiday here I come!! I'm not much of a social butterfly so I spend my time at home doom scrolling, tending my little garden and gaming but recently I've started working out more and going jogging with my family at night as a bonding activity. I'm actually an introvert (I fear society), but well if someone press the right buttons and mentions my interest I'll do a 180 flip and become really really really hyper.. (Ehem my friends were duped by my emo persona till they found out the monster inside me >:)) I like to learn about animals (Like did you know platypuses breastfeed by oozing their milk across their skin? It's because they don't have nipples!)  sometimes history and finding more men to hyperfixate on :3. I have a hard time adjusting to changes in my routine (I don't like changes..), I also have an irrational fear of spiders eep!!(though I'll cool with cockroaches for some reason) and the darkness scares me, I still run fast whenever I turn off the lights in the hallway because what if the Boogeyman gets me.. I got a shy darling on your last survey on what type of darling we are so uhh I hope it helps with the matching!

4, My most aura farming moments has got to be when I won first place in an academic competition.. It felt so good to have my hard work pays off, all the time I've spent studying!!

5, Sorry Rina but this side quest will have to rot in the quest menu.. (I can't draw that well and I want it to be perfect for you!!) Okay that's all I have for you, sorry if it's too long ahh!! I hope I can still get a match. Happy one year anniversary and have a great day!!”

Hiii, honey!! I hope you have a phenomenal day as well ♡♡

Now, now, a lot of you seem to have chickened out on the drawing because of the fear that my drawings will somehow mog yours. I must advise all of you, it is a very soul-healing activity to let go of perfectionism once in a while and draw the most horrendous shit you have ever seen. Moreover, as you may have noticed as you scrolled down on the post, I had plenty of my own fun on the drawings. Comparison is the killer of joy, and you should never not do something because you fear that someone else might be better at it. Chase your dreams, my babies. I should’ve offered you primogems for completing the quest

I did not know that about platypuses. Why can’t I do that. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ TIGHNARI!

For the record, Alhaitham was in the possible matches, but I must not get swayed by the bias. 

Since you’re academically oriented, it should come as no surprise that Tighnari might take interest in you. While he has his job as a forest ranger, botany is very much his field, and what do you like to do? You like to garden. A match surely made by the Dendro Archon herself. 

I think he’d get anxiety if he had a partner that ran around wherever and potentially got themselves in trouble, so you being more of a homebody is more than okay with him. It’s probably something that ends up reducing his stress levels, too: He has a good reason to hang around at home and not get overworked by whatever his students and the other rangers have got going on. 

He’s also 101% a routine person, and he can’t stand things that distract him from them. When you get your habits to sync up with his, life flows so smoothly that you can hardly find any annoyances in his behaviour in that regard. Then, when it comes to your interests and such, you can be sure that he’s prepared to talk about animals and such for hours on end (literally a part of bro’s job), even though he occasionally needs his own time to recharge. 

Oh, and he draws, too, no? Considahhh: Him making notes and asking you to join him with drawing the images for them. 

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@nobloodonlycoffee asked:

“Hello!! I’m sending in a request for a matchup - if possible maybe one from each Hsr and Genshin? (But if u only want to do one that’s totally fine! In that case I’d prefers Hsr) I have a male preference, but if there’s a lady really speaking to you I’m down for that too~

Appearance wise I’m on the smaller side and have pretty serious baby face, so people tend to think I’m younger than I really am (one of my mom’s friends said she thought I was 14, I’m 21 (0_o))

Basically my whole life I’ve been interested in anything “strange” or out of the norm, which I think originated from me being a very stubborn child that didn’t like being told what to do - if something was “too scary” or not appropriate for someone my age, I was absolutely going to try and check it out 😅

I’m very chronically online (gacha gambling addiction), but I still like to touch grass (I love to hike) - my other hobbies are mostly drawing and reading. Overall I’m very introverted, but it’s less due to social anxiety and more so that I just get tired out by people very quickly. Usually I prefer to observe people rather than actually interact with them, but I hope to eventually be a bit more sociable. Im good at reading people and adjusting myself to best fit the vibe/situation - although I’m charming to others I struggle to feel any deeper interest or connection with them. 

Also, my mbti is “intp”, and when I took your “darling type” quiz I got the Helter Skelter type :)

Sorry if this ended up super long, I wasn’t sure how much to write so apologies if it’s too much!! (Also I did the mini self portrait :D) thank you for the matchings, I absolutely adore all your work (and good luck to your studies! I look forward to the announcement that you’re officially a doctor!)”

No fucking way I also got told that I look 14 the other day, and I, too, am 21. I genuinely don’t know where the guy pulled that from because I’ve always thought that I look my age. I don’t know if I should get offended or not.

Looking at the shirt, I’d argue that the helter-skelter reached the correct address. Thank you for following me for as long as you have, I’m always glad to spot you in the notifications (୨୧ᵕ̤ᴗᵕ̤) I’m afraid the doctor announcement is still five years away, but if I’m still active on this blog by then (which I very much hope to be), I pinky-promise to do another round of match-ups for the celebrations. 

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ DAN HENG!

This was actually a bit of a tricky match-up to make, and I was on the fence between him and Jing Yuan, but I ultimately chose Dan-Dan here because of the grass-touching part. Don’t ask.

It’s the calmness, especially, that he appreciates in a person, and you do have that, to a degree. In my humble defence regarding such an observation, I have found that there’s a chaotic way to be chaotic, and then there’s a very serene way to be chaotic, and I would diagnose you with the latter. I think that very quality is something he finds very endearing, because on one hand, he would have a wild ride with someone who’s all over the place, but on the other, he himself is a very muted sort of a person, so having you with him kind of makes him bloom, if that makes any sense. It’s a perfect balance. 

He’s very fond of nature, so it’s something you can bond over. Especially after the Amphoreus shenanigans, hiking (with you) is something he has grown very fond of, and he tries to make as much time for that as possible with how hectic the life on the AE is. Drawing is something he’s not personally that big on, but reading is another story completely, of course: He’s very fond of the activity, and it doesn’t even matter if the genres you’re interested in are entirely different — you can open new worlds for each other. And, if your social battery is dead-dead, you can always trust him to offer his lap for you to read and recharge in. 

Also, he’s a social observer as well, so you’ll both just be staring at the party from the sidelines like birds on a wire. Moreover, no words really need to ever be said between the two of you for an understanding to have been reached: It’s borderline a telepathic connection you have got going on with him.

I thought I’d stick to the HSR match-up for this for scheduling reasons, but I thought I’d tell you that I would’ve picked Rizzley 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──

@ventiffy asked:

“Hii!! I love your content! Thank you for doing this btw💗!

1. Which fandom (Genshin or HSR)? Genshin!!

2. Would you like a lady or a gentleman or will either do? A gentlemen, please!

3. What do you like to do, what sort of a person are you? As a health science student, I love anything scientific or related to medicine. I don't have time to partake in any of my hobbies, since I'm constantly stuck studying... However, whenever I find the time, I like to watch documentaries and read! I love nature and animals and general- like I have a huge heart for strays and I automatically become happier whenever I see a cute squirrel or something (all animals are cute to me so I’m always happy)! I love anything related to herbs and learning about herbal remedies! I also like having tea or coffee in the morning! However I usually go with the latter and save tea for later.

4. Describe the moment you farmed the most aura in the past year. I was able to shelter 2 stray cats!! I was able to get them to like me and now they always run up to me whenever they see me outside. I built a small shelter for them with food and a place to sleep and hide from the cold/rain and so on! I really don’t care about awards, for me.. it’s moments like these that actually are huge wins for me!”

MEDICINE! MEDICINE! MEDICINE!!!! RRAAAAAAAAAHHHH

I diagnose you with…

ᯓ★ KAZUHA!

A gentle soul + a gentle soul is an unbreakable combo. 

He can’t say he’s that much of a science person — I suppose he never had the time or the resources to study — but it doesn’t really matter to him: It’s your essence that he’s interested in as a whole, not the knowledge you might be able to offer.

He’s obviously a big fan of nature, and he has never been one for city life. Moreover, he has an innate quality (like you probably do, too) to attract animals, meaning that you’ll be having, for the lack of a better term, a Disney princess aura wherever you go with him. He finds the huge heart you have an incredibly beautiful trait, and since he himself is also a very kind person, the connection is strong-strong. 

Slow things in life are something he vastly appreciates whenever he gets to have them. Having tea with you in the morning, whether that be in complete silence or chatting, is perhaps one of his favourites. 

And the cats. With whatever happened with his friend, you having stray cats could make him burst into tears. You’ll be the best cat parents ever. 

Anonymous asked:

"omg yes we need the ashveil profile. the lack of yandere ashveil content is killing me

love your writings <3"

I KNOWWWW there's so little content about him and for what. The profile is on its way, don't you worry ( ｰ̀εｰ́ )

܁₊ ⊹ . ܁ ⟡ ܁ . ⊹ ₊ ܁

Anonymous asked:

"Your Dan Heng Sunday rivalry reminds me of a fic I saw!! It was a Phainon X Dan Heng piece but there was some X Sunday stuff at the very end!! It was tagged “Cuckday” on ao3 and it made me think of the ask you just answered because it’s so funny that Sunday would not step in for Reader getting too close to Dan Heng and might end up getting unintentionally cucked. Poor man has abducted the Reader but still cannot stop her from slamming Dan Heng."

Cuckday is actually taking me clean out.

No, but I genuinely don't think he'd have the courage to go against Dan Heng of all people. Like, Dan Heng is his elder and has been on the Express for way longer than him, you probably built a much stronger relationship with him during the time you were on the Express out of your own volition, and now that you perceive Sunday to be the main threat, who would be the best person to go to?

Sunday watching you agree to play cards with Dan Heng after he has done everything in his power to try and get you to even talk to him:

܁₊ ⊹ . ܁ ⟡ ܁ . ⊹ ₊ ܁

Anonymous asked:

"HI HI HI RIINNQAA MY FAV YANDERE BLOG EVER!!! have you seen Lohen from Genshin bc I SWEAR HE HAS THE POTENTIAL TO BE ON YOUR PROFILE ❗️❗️❗️"

Lonh 🤤🤤🤤 His freakass doesn't even need to be yandere to be yandere. He very much has the potential, I swear I'll uphold the yandere part of the blog when I get the chance ( ༎ຶ‿༎ຶ )

܁₊ ⊹ . ܁ ⟡ ܁ . ⊹ ₊ ܁

Anonymous asked:

"Hi! I recently found your acc and wanted to say I think your writing is v good... I really like how much care you put into the characterization since I find a lot of yan stuff can be a little samey y'know?

also ik youve said you mostly just write for guys but the Kafka crumbs in Blade's profile got me pondering...however there is no pressure I am super appreciative that you take the effort to write all this AND also share it!!

Hope you have a good day :)"

Helloo!! Thank you so much for the kind words, it means a lot ( ˘ ³˘ )♡

To answer your question, I can't actually answer your question because I'm still unsure myself. So far, I've written one (1) work for a woman (that being Arlecchino), and profiles and such are exclusively reserved for the men which I don't see changing any time soon, but shorter stuff is still on the table ( · ❛ ֊ ❛) You have a nice day as well, honey!!

܁₊ ⊹ . ܁ ⟡ ܁ . ⊹ ₊ ܁

Hello, Apple, I'm rowing up your asks so you don't have to find them all over the Chat (..◜ᴗ◝..) Construction-Riri in action

Anonymous asked:

"CONGRATS ON PASSING UR EXAM!!!!!!!

-🍎"

WHY THANK YOU, APPLE, THAT'S VERY SWEET OF YOU (˶˃𐃷˂˶)

Anonymous asked:

"Goodness we are eating so good today

- 🍎"

Sunny ♫ yesterday my life was filled with rain ♫♫♫

Anonymous asked:

"It just popped up in my head but the idea of darling swinging on Aven, Sunday, Phainon perhaps, and connecting. (I’m talking at least seeing stars for a second if not a nosebleed or in Sunday’s case, a fucked up headwing)

-🍎"

What an idea Apple. Not to promote violence but this is the type of shit I would pull, especially in Aventurine's case. I firmly believe that he'd be the type to be like "omg owww" sarcastically but inside he's actually like "don't crash out don't crash out don't crash out" while holding his hand under his nose with his eyes closed. He lowkey knows he had it coming, too, so you might even evade the syringe TM

I don't know how you're planning on landing a punch on Phainon of all people, but like good luck regardless. I think he'd just be confused if anything after going back into his puppy boyfriend ass behaviour and going like "what did you do that for :----("

Sunny would probably momentarily believe in Ena's cause again if you threw hands at him. I'd personally go for a straight-up grab rather than a punch with him and take a few souvenir feathers while at it. It'd probably be straight to tuning town after that, though, and he'd sulk about it for a good few hours while trying to tidy up the wing in the mirror

Anonymous asked:

"I initially glazed over and thought you were talking about a real man; Believe me when I say that I was ready to ride at dawn for a second. TT

- 🍎"

Thank fucking god I haven't had to deal with predatory DM-sliders anywhere else than in my dreams, it is good to know that my subconscious appears to be very rational about the topic. I think I've only once had like a proper sexual harassment scare with older guys (aside from the usual that pretty much every girl has to go though): I was at a club, dancing with my friends, when this clearly older, maybe like 30ish y. guy gets behind me and starts grinding on me from behind, like hovering his hands on my waist and going for it. Fortunately, the situation was promptly ended by my guy friend who very swiftly proceeded to switch places with me, shoutout to him. Anyhow, people, if you need to ask yourself "am I being sexually harassed right now", it's very likely that you are; don't ever let it slide.

Anonymous asked:

"I got luocha!!!

- 🍎"

RARE PULL

Anonymous asked:

"This just popped up in my head but which yans (from best to worst) do you feel like physically “maintains” their darling (eg: hygiene, hair, makeup)

-🍎"

Conducted a Github priority sort on this one. Sunny obviously takes the cake on this one, I think he'd do everything from your hair to your skincare to your makeup, especially the pre-AE one. Then, on the other end of the spectrum, I don't think Blade would give a flying fuck

Sunny pre-AE Sunny AE Aventurine Luocha Argenti Moze Dan Heng Jiaoqiu Reca Ashveil Jing Yuan Welt Mydei Phai Gallagher Boothill Geppie Ratio Anaxa Sampo Blade

I welcome opinions on the matter

܁₊ ⊹ . ܁ ⟡ ܁ . ⊹ ₊ ܁

(I'm bunching up all of your asks here, should be in chronological order)

soutar asked:

"RIRI DON'T ANSWER THAT DM *BANG BANG* RIRI"

@soutar Baby's first (almost) Tumblr scam 🥀🥀🥀

soutar asked:

"OH HELLO BABEEE!!!! CONGEATS ON PASSING YOUR EXAMS!!!! WHOOOOOOOO 🎉🎉🎉🎉

No but seriously, it feels amazing to see you go further and further in your studies, with each post I feel like we get to learn more about your successes! Like wow... Riri is a med student.... wow.... honestly at this point I would let you do brain surgery on me. I hope you take that break and rest really well<333. Also also even though I cursed you out earlier for putting that brain stuff in the quiz I actually love it, feels like we get a peak into that med student life (and I'm not gonna lie it is interesting too!)

Now I shall say my curiosity has been... piqued 🧐 so.

What kind of results in the quizzes you got? 🫵 The hsr yandere quiz, the genshin one, the darling one... I need to know all of them pretty please with cherry on top 🙏🙏 (maybe it's kind of cheating considering you made them, but honestly I don't care!!! Also if you didn't do them yet then I'll be waiting.....)

And did you already finish your job watching poor students suffer at the finals?? Let us know how it went if you did!

Rest well andd enjoy your holiday mwah mwah mwah 💋💋💋

I hope I'm not too late and make it into the next thoughts post ✌️"

HELLOOOOO HONEYYYYY WHAT IS UP MY BEAUTIFUL EEPYDEEPY BINKYBONKY HONEYBUNNY

1/6 a doctor, I can't believe it and somehow also don't want to believe it because the amount of responsibility I'll be having does not sit right with me with the amount of information I have now. I know it'll grow on me with time but every time I try to visualize myself in a doctor's coat, I'm like ...🧍‍♀️. They warned us about this exact thing last autumn but I really do feel like the more I learn, the less I know. But, I have faith that it'll all grow on me with time, and I'll do my best to become a good doc, thank you for the encouragement ദ്ദി(˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧ Yes babe I think I could conduct a lobotomy on you if I tried really hard!!

The quizzes, quizzes-quizzes-quizzes, of course I did them myself too, naturally ( ๑‾̀◡‾́) On the HSR one, I think I first landed Phainon and then Dan Heng on another occasion, on the Genshin one I got Albedo, and what sort of a darling would I be if not the feisty one. I've always been more on the temperamental side, and while the trait is often considered negative, I've always thought of it as one of my best qualities because it came with a sense of fighting spirit and a fiercely positive outlook on life (•̀ᴗ•́ )و

I did finish the job, thank you for asking! It went very well, I got to eat free bananas and watch people put their soul into the academics, very inspiring. You enjoy your almost-holiday too, baby (˶˘ ³˘(´͈ ᵕ `͈˶)

soutar asked:

"Riri.Riri. Riri my finals are on Monday Riri what do I do I'm gonna puke eughjhhhhhhh 🤢🤮🤮🤮🤮"

What subject what subject don't panic don't panic, the mnemopnic for the Krebs cycle is Can I Keep Selling Sex For Money Officer in biology, hurricanes spin clockwise in the South and counter-clockwise in the North in geography, the word "such" needs an article if a singular form word follows it (I'm still fixing that in the earlier works) in English, the WWII started 1st of September 1939 and ended 2nd of September 1945 in history, philosophy I have no fucking clue about, remember to state that "let it be assumed the gas behaves like an ideal gas" in chemistry, the derivative function of e^x is itself in maths, when they inevitably ask for a real-life example of induction the answer is a stovetop or an electric toothbrush charger in physics, uhhhhhhhhhhhhh

soutar asked:

"Hello Riri!! Okay okay last ask for this week I swear 🥺🥺

With which yanderes do you think ignoring them is worse than answering them even in a snappy way??

And please please please I need to see how some of the characters would react to absolute brainrot humour once 🙏🙏 the reader needs to look into Blade's eyes and say 67 that would heal me 🙏

And I'm not sure if you answered that before as my current memory is that of a goldfish so I'll ask anyway, what's your opinion on Jiaoqiu and would you ever consider doing a profile for him? (You're both doctors you can flex your med knowledge wink wink) (My very not obvious attempt at manipulation ☝️)

As always have a good day and let us know how you're doing mwah! ✧⁠◝⁠(⁠⁰⁠▿⁠⁰⁠)⁠◜⁠✧"

... You're saying that like it's a bad thing that you're talking to me 🤨🤨🤨

Good luck ignoring Phainon. I think he's kinda bad either way because if you ignore him, he'll pester you more, but if you entertain him, he'll pester you as well. Though, the latter might be a bit less annoying in the long run when he calms down, so him. Then, I think with Boothill, silent treatment could eventually get him mad enough to take his gun out as a threat, so you might want to say a few words. Aventurine will ragebait you until you start talking, Gallagher too, Argenti is the pestering kind, Ashveil... (Then on the other end of the spectrum, I don't think Blade would mind if you didn't talk for a week straight. He's chill like that)

Saying the first syllable of 67 to Blade and he's just like

In my humble opinion, the serial brainrotters would include Aventurine, Sampo, Boothill and absolutely Ashveil. Ashveil would try so hard to stay on top of whatever the popular thing is at the moment, like imagine accidentally slipping out 67 in a normal context and he just interrupts you mid sentence and goes "haha 67", subsequently ending all conversation for the next 5 hours between the two of you.

I think Aventurine would watch the HSR equivalent of IG reels with you on his phone. Like, imagine being irked that he has you cuddled against his side, then the most diabolical reel comes on, you let out a very tired and half-hearted laugh, and he won't ever let that go. it's all downhill from there.

Then, imagine hitting Jiaoqiu with brainrot humour. You know he'd try to be like "oh haha" but he just looks at you like

About Jiaoqiu, yes, his profile is in the plans! Probably among, let's say the next six profiles whenever I get that far, I haven't decided yet. He has insane potential on the medical malpractice bodily side of things, in all corners of the darling life.

I am doing very well, thank you for asking! I just went to the store today and got a boxful of soon-to-expire fruit and vegetables for ridiculously cheap, and I'm making a pasta-kale-chicken-mushroom-tomato-whatever-the-fuck salad tomorrow ( ꈍ◡ꈍ) Have you been well?

܁₊ ⊹ . ܁ ⟡ ܁ . ⊹ ₊ ܁

Anonymous asked:

"do you think yandere boothill would have a thing for a darling with piercings since it affirms that she's got like. flesh. and is real and not metal like him"

You know, I don't think he'd have a particular preference for any sort of a darling looks-wise. He himself has piercings even though he's metal, so I don't see the flesh and blood being a factor that would cross his mind, although he would for sure find them cool. He'd probably buy you a matching bullet earring if you have your ears pierced. Or he'd try to pierce them himself with like a safety pin

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magnificentkidclamclod asked:

"Sunday is gonna regret letting me have my phone and regret watching the absolute lowest of humor I laugh at on Tik Tok.

Also I appreciate how both iterations of Sunday are like this picture, serving and staying 'mostly' calm while we want them dead."

@magnificentkidclamclod Sunny watching the HSR equivalent of reels or Tiktok with you and it's just the screaming chicken five clips in a row and he has to sit through all of them with you

I think the funniest part about his patience is that though he always behaves basically the same no matter the emotion, you never know if he's like 😌 or 🙂🔫 inside

܁₊ ⊹ . ܁ ⟡ ܁ . ⊹ ₊ ܁

Hiii, Tutel, bunched up your asks so they're in one place!! Here's your background music:

Anonymous asked:

"Haloo Riina it's me 🐢. I just wanna ask if you play twisted wonderland. and if you do, who is your favorite character?👀"

I do, in fact, play TWST, albeit not very actively and I'm on JP server since I started before the EN version dropped. My favourite characters are Silver, Lilia, Malleus (oh I used to be crazy about him when I was younger), Vil and the Leech twins, and Idia has grown on me (.◜◡◝)

Anonymous asked:

"Hello, 🐢 here!

I hope you're doing well and all the best for your exam Miss Riri!

I just took your "types of darling" test and the description lowkey hit a little too close to my heart cuz like HOW did you know that?! WITCH!!(Jkjk) Ahem, especially the "things to take into account" one, I didn't expect that your words were what I needed to hear for me to open my eyes. So all I wanted to say is thank you very much for making this fun quiz! :D"

I conducted a bit of stalking and found that you got placid darling, and I would like to inform you that you are the rarest breed of the darling society according to the results. I stand with you on your journey to self-discovery and commend every small step you take towards whatever direction you're going in, no matter if the boost for that comes from real life achievements or half shitpost quizzes done by some blokette on Tumblr.

Thank you for the well-wishes, and I hope you're doing well too!! Keep your spirits up, Tutel (✿◡‿◡)

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Anonymous asked:

"reader becomes really docile after becoming sick.. which yan would purposely make her sick just so he can see her being his lil meow meow"

Well if it isn't the most Jiaoqiu-coded thing I have ever read. And Anaxa-coded. And Luocha-coded. And lowkey Gallagher-coded too. Though, I don't think any of the yanderes would purposefully make you get sick since that's like a health hazard and they don't want your ass to get like chronic bronchitis and whatnot, but they'd definitely be like oh noooo how could this beeee

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Anonymous asked:

"oh ik damn well aventurine gets that darlings bangs trimmed on a set schedule. 💇‍♀️💇‍♀️💇‍♀️"

YOU KNOW ITTTTT

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@cerebralinvader asked:

"like a few days after you posted about your mr reca dream i got a dream where phainon was stalking me like CRAZY (im talking following me in dark alleyways, creepy packages on my doorstep, repeated messages no matter how many numbers i block, breaking into my house, the whole shebang) and in my dream i was so fucking stressed dude i was like tossing and turning bro 😭😭

great to look back on but i was NOT cheesed during it"

Insane dream plot to go through. 5/5 cinema.

I find that there are two types of dreams when it comes to fictional guys: The nice ones and the absolutely fucking terrifying ones. I just recently had a dream that I was cuddling with Sunny and I felt well-rested the entire day, but then there's my all-time most jumpscare-ish yandere dream that I had ages ago where I was locked in a room with Jade leech from TWST. There was like a table in between us, and I was trying to get around it and to the door to escape him, but he managed to like half grab my arm while I was at it, I tripped on the table leg, fell to the ground, he got on top of me and like violently slid his hand under my shirt and to my bare ribs, and I genuinely woke up with spasms that looked like I was having a seizure. I was sharing a room with another girl and she woke up to it. I did not attempt to explain

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@nyxstelle asked:

"Just wanted to say that your profile looks cute especially your art (⁠人⁠ ⁠•͈⁠ᴗ⁠•͈⁠)"

Hii, that's so nice of you to say!! I vastly enjoy drawing the banners so I'm glad to hear that people enjoy them (❀ˆᴗˆ)(•́ᴗ•̀✿)

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Anonymous asked:

"lowkey, can i ask why you have beef with kaeya (you mention it in your intro/rules in the pinned post, and i have a feeling that there's an incredibly funny reason for it lol)"

You can absolutely ask me that, Anon. You are the second person to question that, and while I wish I had a funny answer, I do not — I just can't stand his guts. The fashion irks me, the voice irks me, the slow clapping when he first walked into frame? I was ready to uninstall. Lumlum is so strong because I would've sent him into the next life on the spot when he did the wannabe betrayal thing

܁₊ ⊹ . ܁ ⟡ ܁ . ⊹ ₊ ܁

Anonymous asked:

"girl i am itching for those ashveil headcanons, cannot wait to read them bc i know you'll do well by that old wolf (is it just me or is he extra neglected in the yan community??)

your writing is amazing"

AUGHHHH I'm putting my soul to the Ashveil profile because there's so little content about him, it's underway and looking good so far (I hope). You know, I don't think I can ever properly express how flattered I am when people drop by to compliment my writing, like I tend to think long and hard about how to put it into words but then it ends up looking like word vomit with me there like 🥹🥹🥹 THANK YOU for saying that, I'll do my absolute best!!

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@chryseis-lxve asked:

"hi miss rin!! XD i hope you've been doing AWESOME!! your recent lohen fic was so yum that i couldn't help but return to phainon's profile (again XD) and i was really curious about this paragraph: Moreover, you don’t feel a single ounce of sympathy coming from Mydei’s direction, and the way he looks at you is... off. Truthfully, he isn’t any better than Phainon: The two do a lot of things together, competing against each other in the most bizarre of ways, so there’s really no reason why darling-hunting wouldn’t be one of the activities. With this in mind, in such realm of things, there would be no greater feat than managing to snatch the other’s treasured one away. It’s best to stay on your guard. 

like. what does this mean?? 😭 would mydei and phainon genuinely do stuff like abducting each other's darlings?? like fr?? 😭 or is it just a fear the darling is shown to have?? 😭 i honestly can't help but imagine a scenario lmao where both their darlings just team up and deck them with the power of friendship or smth 🤭😋"

Hellooo baby, how have you been? I've been doing very well, thank you for asking (✿˶◕‿◕˶人◕ᴗ◕✿)

Thank you for sending this one in because this citation happens to have one of the aforementioned "such a" typos. No, but I like having these subtle foreshadowing types of lines in the profiles because I think of the yandereism as a disease of sorts where you find your darling and just spiral. What I thought in this one was that when Mydei meets you, he might get attached like that and then try to steal you from Phainon. Or you'll get shared. Yippeeeee

Darling association. Darlings unite

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concha-404 asked:

"I GOT VENTI, MY BOYYYY

I would like to thank my parents, my siblings, the taco stand I went to today, and the amazing and benevolent author Riri ●|￣|＿"

What taco stand did you go to. Drop the tacos

Amazing benevolent author Riri wants your tacos

concha-404 asked:

"Shit lowkey clocked me 😥, but like fire bars must be spit I'll take the timeout corner 😔🫶"

I saw someone be disappointed that they were a helter-skelter. Like the audacity, they don't understand how to appreciate the good things and fire bars

܁₊ ⊹ . ܁ ⟡ ܁ . ⊹ ₊ ܁

Anonymous asked:

"Hi Riina!! Your recent update to the quizzes is such a treat since I just got back to both the hoyo games after a long while. Since you mentioned Yan!Albedo warming up to his darling's emotions after a bit, I'm curious what you think he's like before and after that happens (how often he'd spend time with them or get a little touchy with them etc). That being said, I'm also curious on Klee and Durin's reactions to Albedo's darling? Would they be aware of her situation or would they be unknowing bystanders that make it tolerable for her (assuming they can interact with her)? Thank you for taking the time to make and update the quizzes constantly, they're always fun to do :)

(My long forgotten love for Albedo was dragged to the surface, can you tell ;;;)

((Also, can I be 🫧 anon if it's not taken already?))"

Hello, honey!! Ahhh, a fellow Albedo lover, he was my first limited 5star.

I think he'd be super careful at first, translating as him not quite knowing how to console you beyond like a hand on your shoulder and a few "there there"s since he isn't necessarily the type to wear his heart on his sleeve himself. At the start, he's cautious with how he touches you: Anything past your hands and arms and hair are off-limits for a long time before he gets the gist of how to deal with you in general, and it's only after that that he dares to properly start chatting with you and hugging you and so on.

The Klee situation would be an insane enabling spree because you know for a fact that Alice is in support of whatever Albedo is doing to you. You just have Klee dropping by every once in a while and you have to pretend that everything is gucci to not shatter the illusion. Durin would also be diabolical to have around because bro was born 15 minutes ago and he ends up thinking that the yandere thing is normal. Aiyaiyai

Regarding the topic, nobody has managed to land Illuga, Lohen or Ashveil yet even though I checked that all of them are possible to get. They're still waiting for their darlings to arrive 🥺🥺🥺

Yes, you can have that emoji! You shall be my blub-blub, plop-plop Bubble-Anon, c'mere babe (っ˶ ˘ ᵕ˘)ˆᵕ ˆ˶ς)

܁₊ ⊹ . ܁ ⟡ ܁ . ⊹ ₊ ܁

Anonymous asked:

"yan with addict darling... 👀👀👀"

... What sort of addiction? Gacha gambling? Phone? Crack cocaine?

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Anonymous asked:

"Rereading the yandere profiles and especially Mydei's profile makes me feel funny angry cause its like 'okay so you kidnapped me cause you like me? Say it then, look me in the eyes and confess your feelings to me.' Idk if that'll even do much but the idea of calling him out and hopefully a chance of making him flustered makes it feel like a small victory"

Bold of you to assume that he wouldn't like fold his arms, take a proud stance with a straight face and just go "I love you". I don't think you could ever hope to properly fluster the man unless you say something so out-of-pocket that he has to take a good few seconds to even begin to think how to answer it. You need to start talking in brainrot

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Anonymous asked:

"Heyyy I was reading through your yandere hsr masterlist and the one thing that I can't stop thinking about is how you constantly allude to other factions and the likelihood of them turning yandere as well and I mean.....imagine a universe where MC is just really good at evading her captors at the cost of gaining more with every successful escape? Stuck with Adventurine? Ask the Family for help! Uh oh! That guy Sunday got obsessed with you! However will you get out of this one? Ask the Astral Express for help, of course! ....Uh Oh! And you get it!

Idk if you've made a post about it before but it would be so incredibly humourous (and traumatic for our Y/N) if she just kept getting into more and more and more situations like....she's never going to have a normal life ever again 😭😭 she's cooked 😭😭😭😭"

No because I do occasionally think about this exact scenario. Like, no matter where you go, there's some guy trying to snatch you away. Collecting yanderes like infinity stones. Imagine waking up in a dark room, clearly not at your own place anymore, thinking like "omg please don't be this specific guy please don't be his specific guy he was so fucking hard to escape from" and then either celebrating getting an easy one or having your fears come true. Or, imagine a one-will-protect-you-rest-will-hunt-you-down scenario. Good lord

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Anonymous asked:

"Girrr i actually need more of yr hs quotes😭🙏🏻"

Listen, there's like an anonymous forum that the students of the school still keep up and post the teacher quotes there, and every once in a while I see another straight up banger pop up. I checked the channel just today, but no more quality ones have appeared in a few days since it was exam week and such, so I unfortunately cannot give you more right this instant 😔😔

The high school I went to was a one with very study-oriented students, and I think it's a part of the reason why the teachers could let loose and mess around a little. I think back to those days with warmth

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Anonymous asked:

"greetings to my talented and glorious queen riina,

so, i was doing some research the other day for one of my classes, and it got me thinking about how the yans (from both hoyo games) approach giving their darling drugs.

for the yanderes who do drug their darlings with stuff like aphrodisiacs, muscle relaxants, hallucinogens, The Syringe™, etc., do any of them actually worry about their darling possibly getting addicted to said drug, maybe from them using it too much/too often? do they take measures to avoid a possible addiction (limiting the use, changing the dose, etc.)? or do some of them simply not care and just keep on doing it?

(i did go through your rules bc i'm not entirely sure how a topic such as addiction is approached in your rules, and while i didn't see anything, i just wanna make sure that this is okay to send in. if this isn't okay to ask, feel free to disregard this and move on, and if it is okay and you want to share your thoughts, pls feel free! just maybe delete this paragraph first lol)

- ☁️"

Well hello there, my fluffy and poofy and non-rainy Cloud-Anon, welcome back (◡ ‿ ◡ ✿)

I frankly did not even consider the possibility of the drugs that the likes of, say, Jiaoqiu, Anaxa, Dottore, Baizhu and so on put in the darling being of the addictive kind — it wouldn't lead the narrative in any direction in my view. I don't think any of them would drop hallucinogens in you since it wouldn't really serve any purpose other than making you paranoid about all the wrong things, but the syringe and whatnot that put you out could end up being something that cease to function with time because you end up just not being afraid of them. Like, Aventurine threatening you with giving you the needle and you're just like "OK DO IT". With aphrodisiac, I don't think it would be the addictive sort in the yandere universe since the function is to make one horny, and your goal isn't necessarily to be that way. I'm not sure if this is a bit of a disappointing answer for you, but if anything, I thought the question was intriguing nonetheless (｡´ ‿｀♡)

I was very evil Riri today and didn't erase the last paragraph, I wanted to say that as long as it's not prohibited in my rules, it's either allowed or my mistake, and neither of those would be your fault ( ˘ᴗ˘ )

܁₊ ⊹ . ܁ ⟡ ܁ . ⊹ ₊ ܁

Anonymous asked:

"pleasantly surprised by blade's yan profile, because you write her so well i'd genuinely love to see if you ever write more blade x reader (+kafka)

honestly i'd take her instead.. ..cough cough who said that :o

would this supposed fanfic even count as a blade x reader if he's just the wet cat third wheel in the corner?? alas semantics schmantics"

Anonymous asked:

"this is blade x reader (and kafka yay) anon and im a prime example of why you should finish reading before commenting

i didnt realise that was the actual point of her presence mb😭"

Ah, cuck Blade back in town. Yeah, I think Kafka would both be your ally and your worst enemy in this situation because she would absolutely go through with getting it on with you if Blade doesn't step up his game. Wow

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Anonymous asked:

"THE GENSHIN QUIZ HAVING TWST CHARACTERS HELLO?!

..does this mean there's an eeny meeny crumb of a chance we'll get twst works:3"

I'm sorry to have to bring you disappointing news, but the crumbs unfortunately aren't on the table ˙◠˙ The characters are more or less high schoolers, and I don't have interest in writing for characters so young, especially the first-years and so on. TWST is a sort of a comfort game for me that I don't really associate with whatever is going on on this blog, but that's that ദ്ദി ´⌣` )

܁₊ ⊹ . ܁ ⟡ ܁ . ⊹ ₊ ܁

pranabefall asked:

"i need you to unironically know that in one of your questions for the last quiz, my neurology lessons gave me the haunting of a lifetime."

NO WAY ANOTHER BASAL GANGLIA ENJOYER

I'm more of a substantia nigra girl myself. It was the easiest to locate

܁₊ ⊹ . ܁ ⟡ ܁ . ⊹ ₊ ܁

Anonymous asked:

"riina... miss riina... yandere neuvilette content please... i'm starving and dying of thirst ugh.... 😭🙏"

I KNOWWWW I miss my pressure washer 3000 too 😔😔😔 Maybe one day.

܁₊ ⊹ . ܁ ⟡ ܁ . ⊹ ₊ ܁

Anonymous asked:

”... What do you even want to play? Strip poker?” you ask him in a dry tone.

”Oho, are you offering?” 

HELL YEAH IM DEFINETELY OFFERING

even as a terrified out-of-my-mind darling, as long as the winnings are good enough, i'd 100% not mind since yayy gambling!!!!! funsies"

You are NOT winning that game. I should've added a 7th darling type in the quiz, Gambler darling

܁₊ ⊹ . ܁ ⟡ ܁ . ⊹ ₊ ܁

Anonymous asked:

"I read your rules and thought this would be okay to send, but i have many thoughts to share about hsr yanderes

i just picture blade's darling being very crow-like, in the sense wherever they go they just grab stuff bcs if they dont gift themselves things, who will. do you happen to be a kidnapee unable to ask their asocial teeny bit violent kidnapper for shit? no hobbies/worldly-possessions? no problem! shoplift whatever tickles your fancy, i highly doubt the literal inter-galactic criminals would care as long as you don't get caught, especially not his-nonchalant-highness blade

idk but just the idea of them having a duffel bag of random ass stuff from places all over is so funny to me

blade: standing there

darling: ooh shiny.. *LUNGES and leaps at planarcadia's consumerist stuff or the golden hour's makeup+accessories shelves*

but many thoughts indeed, just not sure if you're ok with being sent them or i'm worried i'd be spamming"

Anonymous asked:

"i sent a post a grand five seconds ago abt yan!blade and shoplifting and only just had a thought, so that's why i couldn't send it all in at the same time

but him just lifting you up to steal grab something from the top shelf while he dangles you by the armpits like a naughty cat

auughghg so many thoughts swirling in head"

*Very subtly hides the Blade profile trigger warnings behind back*

First of all, thank you for sending this in, I welcome all sorts of thoughts no matter the yandere in question, but I have to say that I'm like half unsure of how to answer this ask because in my eyes, Blade is like THE most terrifying yandere to have because of the Mara and whatnot, this is giving me mad dissonance. If anything, I think it'd be Silver Wolf stealing shit and then trying to give stuff to you but you'd be too scared to take anything because of the man looming right behind you. Like, with the stuff bro has subjected you to, I don't think you'd dare to as much as glance in any direction other than the ground when you have to move from one place to another. Though, I don't think he'd give a shit if you were to go snatch something, but having enough guts to do it would be an entirely different matter.

I can't believe I'm saying this after writing a Lohen fluff fic of all things, but this scenario is a little bit too non-yandere for me. However, all glory to you Anon, may the crow darling find all the shinies in the city.

܁₊ ⊹ . ܁ ⟡ ܁ . ⊹ ₊ ܁

Oh, my darling Blossom-Anon, you have come so far. Today, you have sent enough asks to achieve your first ever Blossom ask wall. As usual, top to bottom, left to right

I do hope you didn't take the answer to that ask as a jibe, it wasn't mean tot be one: It's incredibly endearing that I know from the first sentence who's writing to me. Your asks in general have this letter-esque feel that makes them very cute (っ˶ ˘ ᵕ˘)ˆᵕ ˆ˶ς)

I SAW BLADE, and good god, did you see, he's SMILING in his lightcone art. What has this world come to. I haven't played Doki Doki but I know it has the 4th wall breaking horror theme going on, I think I see what you mean!

I have heard of the Aventurine SP's existence (subtle foreshadowing to the next ask), I hope he ends up being in the Ashveil-Blade team eventually. Whatever the case, I'll be pulling for him ( っ´ `)っ

Why thank you for the compliment, it's so nice to hear that people like them because I really enjoy making them. I started drawing a fourth round of the hair thingies but didn't end up finishing it before the exams, so now it's gonna be collecting dust for a while, oops. You and me both regarding the bald self-inserts, it's such a niche thing to complain about but I couldn't ever not draw hair on them unless I'm specifically drawing a bald person, I like drawing hair way too much to skip it.

I'm glad someone picked up on the emotions of the darligs in the drawings, I really tried to make it as you describe!! The Boothill one was the funniest, in my humble opinion, as bro obviously doesn't know what he's doing and the darling very much mirrors that. Very flattered that you would take the time to give deep analysis on them, I actually really like talking about darling-yandere dynamics as you may have noticed with the recent test, so I'm taking the chance to yap 🥹🥹

Aaaand the big reveal, leakers were BULLSHITTING us. How could they. I was looking forward to Aventurine SP, though I have an inkling that he does exist. I'll never understand what could possess a person to spread fake leaks for the sake of it. Like, come on, go to Twitter to spread misinformation like the rest of us

Lygus? Got my freak going. Screwllum? Just thought about adding him to the HSR test the other day, I just need to get around to drawing him. I really wish we got to see him more, same with Reca. The Lygus face reveal was such a deyassification. Never would I have believed I get to read "Where there is a hole there is a goal" out of a Blossom-Anon ask, but here we are. Have you seen that one gif where Lygus throws it back

This year was very well for me, thank you for saying that!! You're not overstepping at all, I'd be happy to share: The med program is six years in here (I'm pretty sure it's that way for the entirety of the Nordics), and it's basically all med but it has a few mandatory courses for English and so on, I'm actually not entirely certain about everything that I'll have to do in the following years. High school, I like to think, was for the basic education, and in uni, it's all about the profession that you've chosen. After the six years in med, I'm gonna get the doctor license, and after that it's another six years if I want to specialize (which I will, just not sure which field yet).

I liked doing quizzes when I was younger, too, and that hasn't left me even now as you can probably see. I myself got feisty darling, which I think is very fitting, if I do say so myself. I don't think I could ever have enough guts to make you people take a matchmaking quiz for myself, that would've been a diabolical drop 😭😭 Imagine having me as your yandere, can't afford food for two on student budget

Butbutbut all that is nice to you, Blossom, and I hope to see you again soon. Take care, mwah (づ￣ ³￣)づ

܁₊ ⊹ . ܁ ⟡ ܁ . ⊹ ₊ ܁

And last but not least, the great wall of Crown Anon asks, this time with an extra thirst post as decoration plus a singular ask that I forgot to include in the actual picture because I didn't spot the text form emoji regard

Tactical Sunny

Sunny Sunny Sunny Sunny Sunny oh what have you done to me. I originally thought that the profile would end up hanging around 25k words but here we are, oops. Why thank you for the compliment, I wanted to think that I did a good job on his character. It's funny that we had Dan heng and him back-to-back because they're so similar both in personality and the circumstances, of course, but there are still differences, I like to think. Welt out here making sure that every last one of his boys gets a darling for themselves. The Tb makes it their mission to catch Sunny in the act.

Listen, I think Sunny would be so horrified by the thought of a toy that resembles an actual dick. Like he literally can't stomach the thought or think about holding an item like that in his hand. He's about the ✨aesthetics✨ of it all. I also think that a part of whatever freakstery went down with the pre-AE version was partially due to the fact that he really wanted to prove to himself that he is dominant Christrian Grey daddy material, and you're none the wiser. His walls were up so high that a dildo couldn't get through. Yes, I have listened to Cupcakke, I'm pretty sure I still know CPR word-to-word because of a bet. Trying to pull stupid shit with Sunday, and the next time he doesn't even try to see if you're docile, it's just Harmony right away.

Why is Blade smiling in the cone. What has gotten into him. Is the canonicality of the profile about to end itself.

CLANK CLANK CLANK CLANK CLANK

Government mandated orgasm is insane. Do you think they'd just send a guy at my doorstep or

Aventurine type of stuff. Or Reca. Or Anaxa.

You never truly feel lost before your PC stops working. I would be in shambles

Med-Riri (not officially allowed) back in town, tiredness causes tinnitus for me, makes the back and neck muscles tense and that can cause it and whatnot. You need a Boothill to come massage you

Another threat for cunnilingus. Can I at least decide on the person

YOU'RE GRADUATING? MY DARLING BABY HONEY CROWN-ANON IS GRADUATING? 💥💥💥💥💥 OH I AM SO PROUD OF YOU THE EXAMS HAD NOTHING ON YOU. Girl does your friend know what you're reading on that thing. I am a huge fan of the Robin gifs, they have every emotion you could possibly think of. Crowndaddy, now that you're graduating, you can pursue a flourishing career. I have given up on meta, I'm just pulling whoever I like at this point. 4 DPS team kind of shit. What is the context behind calling The Dahlia pussy salad woman. Please.

Okay I take the mom thing back, class is braver. You are one of a kind. Listen -30 is not that bad once you have lived in here for your entire life, I have this super thick jacket for winter that I look like a worm in, but it's very warm. I've never used a hairdryer, I've just bunched the hair up to the side of the pillow and gone to sleep like that. Unicicle. Worry not, I have utilized my artistic sense yet again. I still think back to your first ask to me with the quotes. They grow up so fast.

Yea I think the Mortenax mf might be a little softer as a yandere if whatever we've seen about him is anything to go by. Not sure what I think of that yet. The lack of Ashveil content is abysmal, I am working to remedy that. How does paper taste.

Do you think Boothill actually knows how to do your hair or if he's just bullshitting around for the sake of it. The hair is easily my favourite part to draw when I draw humans, as you can maybe tell, and it was so nice to get to utilize that in those. LONH 🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤 I also remember waiting for Scara to drop, I still remember how I got him early and won the 50/50. No because it's so funny that Lohen is the first proper fic on the list if last October doesn't count. Oops. Do not ever apologize for the sheer art you send in my inbox, it's like among the top 3 things I look forward to when opening Tumblr.

Dan Heng sex nest. I visited that room so many times when writing the profile because I wanted it to be canon accurate. He really is banging you on that fuckass bedroll.

The pussy salad demon. Why the fuck is she called that. Please.

Anyhow, anyhow, write me back, my dear wife, now that you won't have to be stressed anymore. How was the competition? I await your response with eagerness, though I might not rush to open the door for your letter in case the government mandated guy is at my doorstep. I am not taking the risk.

Your luck is rotten. Rotten, rotten, rotten to the core, decayed and putrid like a worm-hollowed apple. 

Rain patters leisurely against the roof of the tent. The weather has been lamentable for the better part of the past week, and even now, the sky remains starless: A heavy, opaque layer of clouds blocks out the moon and any and all light that could bring even a little solace to the expedition company’s night. 

Lying down, with nothing but a terribly thin bedding separating your hip and shoulder from the cold, hard ground, you shiver and tremble as your body tries to generate even the tiniest bit of warmth. 

You consider checking the time. The pocket watch rests but a few centimetres away by your side, but without a light, you’ll have no chance of making out the pointers. It’s so dark that you could almost convince yourself that you were all alone in the woods, stranded amongst the wilderness, but alas, not even the tent you’re resting in is yours alone to have. 

Lohen. Lohen, Lohen, Lohen. He’s the one you have ended up having to split the tiny square of grass with.

At times, you’ve wondered if your attitude towards the guy could qualify as bullying, but then again, he has done nothing if warranted the aversion. None, not a single one of the company’s soldiers has expressed anything but fearful respect towards him. Despite being short in stature and relatively unassuming in looks, people — including you — know better than to get caught in a conversation with him for a second longer than necessary. There’s a joke circulating among the knights, one that you’re quite certain he himself also knows about: Lohen’s aura enters the room before he does, and should you feel a shiver running down your spine, your last chance to make yourself scarce has just passed. 

Once again, your group literally had to draw straws to determine which one of you should be the unlucky one to share their tent with the maniac. You’ve never once lost the bet yet, and trusting the streak to continue, you weren’t worried about grabbing the piece of hay out of the bunch. Only this time, the short end of the stick was finally to land on you. 

No matter how you’ve tried to listen to what might be going on on Lohen’s side of the pitifully sized shelter, you haven’t heard him make a single sound. It’s as if the guy weren’t even alive: No sighs, no sniffles, no shifting, nothing. Moreover, you couldn’t hope to make out his silhouette even if your back weren’t turned towards him, either, for the pitch black all around has wrapped around you like a thick veil, obscuring both his form and whatever else might be lying on his side of the plot.

His overcoat is laid on the narrow space between your beds, drawing the line in the middle of your assigned sides of the tent — that much you’re aware of. Moreover, you’re acutely conscious of the fact that his spear, as sharp as ever, rests beside the imaginary border, its keen edge mere inches away from your leg. Though you know you’re only scaring yourself in your half-awake state of mind, you wonder how much you would have to stir to slice your foot open on the thing. 

Sure, you’ve tried to forget about it all and just sleep — for the past few hours, to be exact — but it’s oh-so fucking freezing in the tent. You really don’t understand how he’s able to sleep with the entrance not practically nailed shut: The frigid breeze that invades the cramped space every now and then has been quite effective at keeping you from dozing off. The flimsy rug you were supplied with is nowhere near enough to keep the cold at bay, and you’re pretty sure that the clacking of your teeth could be heard in the neighbouring tent despite your best attempts at remaining as still and silent as possible. 

Furthermore, there’s no doubt that if your unfortunate sleeping partner is still awake, he has been able to partake in enjoying the sound as well. It’s impossible to tell whether Lohen is already asleep or not, and you haven’t been keen on finding out: You haven’t even dared to turn over the entire night as the threat of attracting his attention with any movement isn’t a risk you’re eager to take. 

Lying on your side, you cautiously pull your knees even closer to your chest, further away from the opening of the tent by your feet. It’s like the chill were seeping into your very bones, slowing down both your body and mind alike, making it impossible to think about anything but resting while simultaneously being entirely unable to do so. Your fingers have grown numb and sluggish, you can barely feel your toes anymore, and with each passing moment, the thought of going for a scrounge at the neighbouring tent’s blanket supply seems like a better and better idea. 

Once more, you take a deep breath, hold the air, and concentrate on listening to what’s going on behind your back. Pricking up your ears, you try to drown out the drumming of the rainfall and figure out whether the coast is clear or not. 

There’s nothing to be heard aside from the occasional gust of wind rustling the walls of your shelter. You strain your hearing, bringing your hand up to the shell of your ear, making sure not to miss a single sound, yet ultimately, you determine that there’s nothing for you to pick up on: The night is dead silent.

Without deliberating the matter any longer, you decide to commit to the plan. 

Making as little noise as you’re able to, you reluctantly peel the rug off of your trembling body, ignoring the shivers that rake your skin. Then, planting one of your hands on the bedding and pushing yourself into a more upright position, you reach for where you left the lantern earlier in the evening. 

After a moment of carefully groping around the ground beside you, the tips of your fingers make contact with the cold glass shell of the lamp. You wrap your fingers around the metal bail, and after glancing over your shoulder and into the darkness for one last time, you bring the lantern close to your body and give the thing a gentle nudge. 

The kuuvahki crystals inside the glass clink against each other, and in a split second, a warm light illuminates your side of the tent. 

Again, you stop to listen, yet you quickly find that aside from the weather, it’s just as dead silent as it was moments ago. A soundless exhale breaks past your lips. 

For a short while, you simply focus on calming your nerves, reasoning with yourself that ”even if he was awake, he wouldn’t care”, and after a while of self-soothing, you gather the courage to properly sit up. Shifting your legs to the side, careful not to touch the weapon on the ground, you prepare to crawl your way towards the exit.

Only, as you happen to glance towards the ceiling, you find that your shadow has gained height. 

You can quite literally feel your heart skip a beat before it then violently lurches back to life as your eyes connect with Lohen’s own, maroon ones right above you. In the same moment, the lantern slips out of your hand, topples over your lap and rolls across the tent floor on its side until it stops at the foot of his bedding. 

”What’s up”, Lohen speaks, popping the last syllable off of his lips like blowing a bubble. 

For a moment, you’re unable to pay attention to anything but the sudden adrenaline surge rushing its course through your body, fleetingly electrifying your limbs before then exiting via your fingertips, leaving behind an uncomfortable, jittery feeling. Then, after sucking in a deep, shaky inhale, you blink a couple of times and force yourself to breathe again. 

”... Hi”, you squeeze out in a thin voice, letting your hand fall from where you were holding it to your chest. 

”Where did you plan on going?” Lohen then asks, retreating back to his side of the tent, promptly regranting you what little personal space you had. 

You avert your gaze.

”Nowhere”, you lie through your teeth, ”I was just going to close the flaps.”

”Mm, don’t do that”, Lohen briefly shakes his head. ”I need to hear what’s going on outside.”

”But it’s freezing in here!” 

An indignant huff breaks out of your mouth before you can catch it. Propping yourself to sit on your knees, you reach for the rug by your bed and yank it towards yourself.

”Oh, you’re cold?” Lohen follows your movements with his eyes, raising his brows with the usual, indiscernible smile on his lips. 

”And you’re not?” you snap back at him as you pull the cover around your quivering shoulders. 

He lets out an airy chuckle. You only barely manage to curb the reflexive wince your body nearly conducts as he stretches his arm towards the lantern at the far end of his bed. Flipping the thing upright, he brings it to sit in between the two of you, on top of his overcoat. 

”Can’t say I am”, he shrugs. ”I’ve seen worse weather.”

”How reassuring.”

”The roof isn’t leaking, is it?” he then asks, directing his attention at the peak of the tent’s cone-shaped ceiling. 

You only shake your head in response to the question. Watching his gaze return to you after a moment, you find that the warm light of the lantern fails to quite reach his eyes. 

”So, planning on going to bed soon?” Lohen cocks his head to the side in an inquisitive manner, crossing his legs. 

”I was trying to”, you answer him. ”And you?” 

”Woke up to the shuffling.”

”... Sorry.”

”It’s alright. Just about any sound is enough to stir me.”

”Then why didn’t you request to get your own tent?”

The question slips off your tongue before you can consider the possibility of the words coming off as a little insensitive. However, judging from Lohen’s reaction, he doesn’t seem bothered by your tone. 

”I don’t mind sharing”, he responds. ”And it’d be a little unfair to the others who have to share one, you know? Plus, it’s fun to watch which one of you loses the draw each night.”

An uncomfortable feeling settles in the pit of your stomach. You duck your chin down to hide the lower half of your face behind the rug’s edge. 

”I’ve been waiting for you to get the short straw. Took you long enough”, he continues, knocking his knuckles against the lamp to prevent the crystals from dimming down. ”I don’t think I’ve ever seen you squirm like that.”

Your verbal storage promptly empties itself out. Whatever smart remark you were thinking of airing at him dissolves into thin air, and you’re left staring at the ground with sheer mortification written all over your features.

”Nervous?” 

”Lohen, what the hell!” 

You try to keep your voice quiet enough not to be heard in the other tent over, yet the exclamation doesn’t come out as hushed as you wanted it to be. Gathering all of your courage, you raise your gaze to catch his own, only to be met with the sight of a grin so devious that you consider if you should just sleep outside in the rain for the remainder of the night. 

”No, no, answer the question”, Lohen leans forward towards you, causing you to withdraw in the same direction. ”Do I make you nervous?”

“What-”

“Do I?”

”Yes-, yes, you do!” you nearly fall backwards as you scramble to keep your balance. ”Archons bless, keep a safe distance!”

A hearty laugh bursts out of Lohen’s mouth, managing to startle you yet again. Then, with a thoughtful hum, he pulls back, completely skimming over your visibly loath reaction. 

”Yeah, it’s kind of easy to see”, he sighs. ”Heh, sometimes I wonder if you’re cut out for this sort of expedition at all.”

Your brows flatten. 

”Are you fucking with me?” you ask him, shifting your weight to the front of your legs. 

”Very much so”, he stifles another chuckle, briefly sticking his tongue out from between his teeth. ”Is that why you can’t sleep? Because I make you nervous?”

”Quit repeating that”, you scoff as you pull the rug tighter around yourself. ”And no, it’s because I’m actually fucking freezing here.”

”Huh”, Lohen leans his head back. ”Alright then, come here.”

”Eh-”

”Come on”, he cuts you off before you can speak, patting his thigh insistently. ”No use ruminating on it, might as well make use of what we’ve got.”

”Wha-, what? No!?” 

You’re left to stare at the guy’s smug face in both discomfiture and sheer astonishment at the level of the audacity. Yet, as is typical for him, he isn’t fazed by the atmosphere the least bit — he merely continues to egg you on. 

”Why not?” he quirks his brow, spreading his forearms to his sides in a welcoming manner. ”Don’t tell me you think my ears are that bad. I’ve heard the way you talk about me.”

You can’t quite tell what sort of emotion it is that’s spreading across your body at the moment. It’s like you were about to pop a vein and faint from pure embarrassment at the same time. 

”’I always knew you thought he was cute’, right? That’s what Luisa said, no?” he ignores your evergrowing chagrin.

The ground could swallow you whole right where you are, and you would be the happiest person on the planet. Your legs feel like molten wax, you can’t grasp a single thought in your head, and what’s worse, the unravelling is all happening under his horribly attentive gaze.

”How the hell did you hear that?” you fizzle in a high-pitched, barely coherent voice. 

”Aw, but it’s alright”, Lohen makes a brief gesture with his wrist. ”I think you should thank her if anything. You get to have me all night.”

He looks at you with nothing but glee in his eyes, flashing you yet another one of his unnecessarily fraudulent-looking smirks. 

And it’s true. You’ve wondered what it is that’s wrong with your mind for having become interested in the vice captain. If it were your rational side speaking, you would know to stay as far away from him as possible, yet lately, you’ve found yourself stealing quick glances at the teal hair, looking for him in the armoured crowd, and wondering just what might be going through his peculiarly functioning brain. 

Furthermore, occasionally it’s Lohen himself that you’re more worried about. His thought process doesn’t appear to flow like an average knight’s — much less like an everyday person’s — and having borne witness to the kick he gets out of slaughtering just about any enemy that gets in his way, the line between attraction and horrification has grown blurry. 

You don’t even bother hiding the apparent heat on your cheeks anymore. Instead, you let your gaze rest on the sight of the once more dimming lantern between you as you listen to your own, restive heartbeat. You watch the couple of gold-hued stones in the glass globe gradually lose their glow, causing the lit area of the tent’s interior to grow smaller and smaller, until only a faint glimmer remains. 

Lohen sighs audibly, almost theatrically. He then shifts his position to nudge the lamp with the tip of his shoe, and within a second, your surroundings are lit once more. 

”Alright, alright”, he speaks, his voice a considerable amount softer than before. ”Allow me to aid you a little.”

Rolling his shoulders back, he takes hold of the lantern’s bail before moving the thing to sit at the back of the tent. You follow the line of his hand as he then proceeds to pick his overcoat off the ground, give the garment a few shakes, and toss it towards you. The piece of clothing lands halfway in your lap before falling past your thighs and piling unceremoniously at your knees. 

”You can have that for now”, Lohen says, nodding in a satisfied manner, ”and the offer is still open. Come on, two blankets are better than one.”

You wonder how sharp the daggers in your glare would have to be for them to become real. With your face warmer than it has been since you last visited Sumeru, you peek at him from behind the rug’s border, hiding like a damsel behind her opened fan. 

Yet again, Lohen spreads his arms to his sides, tilting his head and raising his brows in an expectant fashion. 

Your hold on the cover tightens. After a few more seconds of contemplation, you take in a deep, elongated breath and speak muffled words against the fabric:

”... If I hear a single word about this in the morning, I’m resigning tomorrow.”

Unadulterated triumph flashes across Lohen’s eyes. He then braces himself just in time to respond to your movements.

In a clumsy, uncoordinated manoeuvre, you close the short distance in between the two of you and quite literally fall against his body, the rug still cloaking you. He greets you with solidity, of course, catching you with a muted yet all the more complacent exhale as he wraps his arms around your back, welcoming you into his oddly comforting embrace. For good measure, one of his hands creeps up to the back of your head where he gives a few scratches to your nape as if he were petting an animal. 

”Heh, my side or your side?” he asks. 

Wearily, you shake your head against his chest. 

”Mine it is.”

With care, Lohen proceeds to recline both of you down on his side of the tent, first settling you on the bedding before reaching over your form to pick up his discarded overcoat. Once again, he shakes the piece of clothing out before gently laying it on your body. Then, finally, he grabs his own quilt lying at the foot of his bed, rests down beside you, and pulls the fabric over both of you. 

The metal embroidery of his dress shirt presses against your forehead, yet you’re not planning on moving a single inch. The icy cold unease that your guts twinged with mere moments ago has now been replaced by a distinct kind of skittishness. You don’t know whether it asks you to stay entirely still or to hysterically flail about, to stay awake for the remainder of the night or fall asleep right where you are, safely encased against his body. 

With how you’re situated, you’re unable to see the lantern’s glow fade once more. Still, you attempt to count the seconds, 10, 9, 8, 7, to when the dark is to consume your surroundings again, and judging from how Lohen eventually lets his head fall lax against his pillow, you don’t think you were too far from the correct timing. 

For a while, you focus on listening to the rhythm of his breaths, to feeling the rise and fall of his chest. You don’t know what it is you would have expected, but as you now have him so close, his presence feels strangely natural. 

”You know, Luisa also said that you could be good for me, whatever that means”, Lohen’s now hushed voice vibrates across his sternum as a light laugh slips past his lips. ”So, I think you should — be good for me, mm-mh?”

A/N

YOU KNOW IT BABEEEE @sakuramantis

Though, this is obviously not the yandere content that I usually do, but the answer is still that YES, I'll absolutely be writing for him. I recently saw his ult animation on the leaks and went like