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today i just (remembers to maintain privacy online) did something really cool. you have to trust me

i have to feel weird and unsure of everything forever #thecurse

also part of growing up is realizing that the embarrassing music you liked in your early teen years still goes hard as hell

everything in the whole world is erotic. except for sex. sex is too on the nose. 

Executive dysfunction is when there’s gas in the tank but no fuse. Either that or the engine is fine but the breaks don’t work. Or somehow both.

we spliced human DNA with Hello-Kitty DNA to make the first Sanriomorph… but it was too cute, and made everyone in the facility smile

(nonchalant) (rock hard) i sense that you kill a lot of people

ever since I was a little girl I’ve wanted to be left at home by myself for several hours

to be honest, kitten doesnt know how many more “ok 💗 yay 💗”s they have left in them

Man, remember when Free The Nipple was a thing and there was an actual substantial amount of feminists who believed even public nudity wasn't inherently sexual and now if you date a short person hundreds of anonymous idiots online will call you a pedophile.