The Swamp Shop

everyone line up i've got one bottle of testosterone gel and there's 17,000 of you i'm about to pull a move not seen since jesus did the bread and fish glitch 2000 years ago

i appreciate asexual perverts but they get enough attention tbh. shoutout my asexuals with no hoes boring as hell no kinks no dirty magazines no riske drawings just completely winning the idgaf war

i feel like it needs to be said that this is a quote from carly rae jepsen

puttting macking cheese in the michael wave

what did you call it? bust a nut squash? what the fuck is wrong with you man, what is fucking *shoves you* what the fuck is wrong with you? *i have you by the collar and you finally repeat what you said which was "butternut squash"* oh my god. Dude im so sorry. eyes welling with tears im so sorry man im so sorry

lately when i've been going to bed i've been trying to imagine a darker shade of red than i did the night before

rothko sleep