well, well, well, what do we have here?

Boat-tailed grackle (Quiscalus major)

little girl in the checkout line was freaking the FUCK out reaching for a shelf and screaming "GIMMEEEE GIMMEEEEE" at the top of her lungs and the mom kept saying "no 🫩" and I look at the shelf expecting there to be candy or something and it was full of batteries

religion is so fucking funny the world is just too beautiful there must be a higher entity behind all this. lets oppress women

"when you say Religion That Oppresses Women you better not mean My Religion That Oppresses Women"

Sibling rivalry only works on the page if both siblings secretly think the other one got the easier version of their childhood. Nobody thinks they won. Write both of them convinced they lost, and suddenly the fighting makes sense.

I wish humans had monkey tails (most likely tail we'd have ngl) because it would be so cute. There's an alternate world out there where people are dying their tails and buzzing patterns into them and getting tail accessories and tail piercings. God could you imagine

this is too much I'm gonna- *remembers joking about rewatching supernatural is harmful* kill myself

“hey this dog looks to be struggling to perform very basic functions and that is very worrying” “well ACTUALLY if you STUDIED THE BREED STANDARD you’d see that this dog is actually the IDEAL ______” YEAH. THIS TOO IS THE PROBLEM. WHAT ARE YOU NOT GETTING.