well, well, well, what do we have here?

this is too much I'm gonna- *remembers joking about rewatching supernatural is harmful* kill myself

“hey this dog looks to be struggling to perform very basic functions and that is very worrying” “well ACTUALLY if you STUDIED THE BREED STANDARD you’d see that this dog is actually the IDEAL ______” YEAH. THIS TOO IS THE PROBLEM. WHAT ARE YOU NOT GETTING.

it really fucks me up that a kookaburra is just an incredibly large kingfisher. how did they do that. they can eat entire snakes. I'm so used to Kingfishers being as tall as my palm, so small.... I need to see one in person more than literally anything else in the entire world

Kids sitcom about a group of friends where all of them are a part of secret magical or superhero based underground society that don’t know about each other and they all think that the others are ignorant normies that they have to protect from their magical shenanigans.

The witch kid, the superhero sidekick, the cryptid hunter, and the half fairy kid are all unknowingly trying to hide the same talking cat from the principal of their school and the talking cat doesn’t tell any of them about each other because it’s currently getting many extra helpings of treats in exchange for its silence.

During the episode where they all find out about each other’s secret lives there’s obviously a slow look over to the cat who’s like “well you never asked. Anyways, completely unrelated but I’ve gotta go.”

As more seasons pass, it's eventually revealed the rich kid who bullies the main cast is secretly child of some dark lord all the societies fear and eventually the bully works with the main cast to defeat them in the series finale or movie

Yeah I’m down for some 8th graders taking down the devil that’s good tv

Yes. Also whenever you ask the talking cat why he can talk he gives you a completely different explanation.

I'm so tired of the way suspicious meat is always human meat like for once I just want to be surprised. Let it be something else I'm so tired of it being human meat

Give me meat that IS genetically human but can't be matched to anyone's DNA!!! Where the fuck is it from?? We don't know!! Scary!!!

Oh people keep disappearing but hey at least the food is really good so that's something right? Womp womp you're eating a guy. Boring. Been there done that. Give me something new

Give me a guy who works in a slaughterhouse who swears on his life he's killed the exact same cow every week for the past 6 months and every time it gets harder to pull the trigger as it looks him in the eyes like it knows him

Usually when the electrician goes 'hey.... there's something you should see' it's because someone set up shoddy wiring. This time it was because he pulled two snakes out of my wall

#it's a good thing he teaches middle schoolers #bc if he was teaching any younger he'd be saying shit like “okay guys say goodbye to the fighter jet!" #and half the science team would respond “goodbye fighter jet!” tags via @hylasregilla

This is so good it looks like a painting :D