I did the same thing as a kid, and interestingly enough I found that as my overall level of stress and daily discomfort improved, I spent a lot less time reading. Over time I’ve realized that the type of reading habits described above–spending every free moment of my day reading, at the cost of everything else–that was a maladaptive coping mechanism.
As a kid, I didn’t read just bc I chose to. I read bc I couldn’t choose anything else. I had no control over my environment, I was constantly overwhelmed, overstimulated, unhappy and isolated. I didn’t have much internet access, certainly not in class, so immersing myself in printed things was my only escape option. That’s what it was all about–escaping.
In hindsight, a big reason I was able to concentrate on longer fiction when I was younger was bc I didn’t have that many options. I didn’t have access to wifi during school hours, and running out of reading material was a huge risk (bc engaging & being aware of my environment was just that painful). Given that it took a large word count to distract myself consistently through the day, reading large books made more sense. When I was a kid, long fiction offered a better “payoff”, the way fanfiction does now.
That is to say: I chose books for many of the same reasons I later chose fanfiction.
The fact that my reading habits have changed has less to do with the fact my brain had changed, and more to do with the way my environment has changed. My brain has options now it didn’t have before. And it turns out, fanfic is a pretty useful option. I’m gradually transitioning to reading more long & traditionally published fiction, but I’ll never forget that fanfic writers were there when I needed different options. I’ll never forget how much that genre helped (and still helps!) when I was struggling.
gummygunk
areudirty
dailybridgerton
jacobvanloon
stormborns
izzy806
pixelskylines
germansingergirl
