My Vipassana Ph Experience
I am out of Vipassana today.
Where did I heard it from?
It was in January 2024 when I first heard about Vipassana on The Evesdrop Podcast on Spotify. Delamar, who had attended the course, only shared few details and didn’t spoil the experience for listeners. She spoke about her time there, her visualizations, the grief that surfaced during meditation, and how it brought her to tears. That’s what draws us in, right? Sitting with our eyes closed, facing whatever emotions arise, and allowing ourselves to be surprised by what comes up. She also mentioned a few things like ten days of noble silence, a man named Goenka chanting in an unfamiliar language, and concepts like impermanence, breathing, and calming emotions when angry, before blurting out words so you wont hurt the people you love. That was pretty much it.
As someone who’s naturally drawn to spirituality, I felt curious, it seemed like just another form of meditation worth exploring. I looked into it in 2024, but at the time, I didn’t feel the need yet.
Late 2025 was a bit chaotic at work (if you know me, you already get it). We wrapped up all our 2025 projects, but nothing was lined up yet for 2026. On January, the office transformer burned out, power’s been down since then. The silver lining? I actually got to make good use of all my idle time. I focused on self-improvements, joined spiritual webinars, took art classes, and finally had the time to finish my Master’s Degree. Then one boooring day on IG, that “What I do according to what ChatGPT knows about me” trend popped up… and of course, I had to try it!
On the photo, there’s a Buddha, tbh, I don’t know much about it, so I googled, a familiar kind of meditation appeared, “Vipassana”! *in my head.. Ooooh! It’s a sign! A divine Intervention! (Wonderful! lol) So I listened to the podcast again, messaged Delamar & another friend who has done it twice says it is highly recommended! Thought it’s time to take a break, and I have too much niche, (haha) I don’t know what to focus on anymore, maybe this meditation will give me some clarity. Also, I AM SOOOO BOREEED!! I signed up! I’ve heard that one should register early cause there’s queue. Feb 9 to March 7 it was on process before I confirmed my attendance. Woohooh!
It’s just a 2-hour drive from our home, but on the way there, I was already so tense, just imagining not being able to talk for 10 days. I even made sure to arrive early so I could still chit-chat with other participants before the noble silence kicked in. In my head, I was like, I’m going to miss my voice.
We surrendered our gadgets, had dinner, went through the orientation, and did a short meditation before the silence began.
Venue: Dhamma Phala, Tiaong Quezon
1st day: woke up at 4AM and prepared for a meditation, there was no instructions yet, so what should I visualize? Then I remembered hearing somewhere that it’s great to start the day with gratitude. And so I did.
I can’t remember what day these instruction was given, (pen and paper were not allowed). “Just breath normally and observe it, and if mind wanders, just breath again intentionally to snap the mind out of it”. Our mind keeps wandering and yeah, so stubborn. We’ve had course lectures every 7pm. One topic discussed was about purification of the mind, like it will get dissected and have deep operation of the mind. If cardiologist is to heart, neurologist is to brain, then Vipassana is to mind in that center. No stopping, no quitting. Just like body operations, it’s critical. Interesting!
Oh My back hurts cause I’m not used to hours of straight body sitting, legs were ok cause we can change the pose. Thought not speaking was the hardest part but it’s actually the easiest. 3rd day, the body adjusted to the sitting, getting used to it.
We just keep on observing the breath for about 4 days, it’s called Anapana Meditation. But, me being stubborn, I let mind wandering, I’ve had sparks of ideas on what to do (on idle time when I’m out), visualized drawings & building plans, I’m on this job anyways.
5th day: Lots of going in my head already, in my room, sitting on my bed, meditating, I saw the last day of my dad in the hospital, watching him being revived, hearing his message in my head, “sorry, I cannot control my body anymore”. Cause if there’s one thing we can control first, it’s ourselves, thoughts, how we would react in situations, even we have control in our body by having heathy habits. I was crying… and even typing this is hard. Heard echoing gongs that morning that I’ve missed the lunch time gong.
That afternoon, I was excited to meditate in the hall, even wondering, will I hear gongs again? During that session, as instructed, I focused on my breath, no thoughts, just respiration. Suddenly, a bright light appeared coming towards me and enveloped the right side of my brain… then it was gone. Moments later, another light flashed on & went to the left. Then I heard gongs coming from the far left, somewhere behind the hall, but there wasn’t any gong there. I was so confused. My mind wasn’t wandering to the future or the past, it felt steady. So I started wondering, is this what it means to dissect the mind? And then, another bright light came towards me to my root chakra up to the heart chakra. It dissolved and left me feeling light. Then, what? another bright light towards me but before It gets in to me, I opened my eyes thinking the sun might be too bright outside and no, it wasn’t just the sun. Those were real energies because I believe. Should I tell the teacher?
Later that day on the group sitting, the whole instruction for Vipassana was given, no more changing poses for an hour is part of it. Total stillness and no visualization or verbalization. Obviously, it wasn’t what I have imagined earlier. It’s just me.
That was my longest 1-5pm sitting in the hall. My back was so tired yet there’s three hours more we’ll sit. Hahahuhu..
At night, I went to the teacher to ask about the technique of Vipassana to make it more clearer. It is too different from other healing modalities I practice. Cause we meditate in present and conscious level yet, releasing negative beliefs (they call it Sankara or Miseries) from the ROOTS? How is that possible? It was mind boggling, is this science backed? I wasn’t able to get a good night sleep that night from thinking.
During my morning walk, I found myself touching the trees and actually talking to them, and even to the sun, just wanted to hear my own voice. Hehe. But also, getting good energy from them.
At lunch, I found a note saying the teacher wanted to see me for an interview. *overthinking, OMG, did she saw me talking to the trees? (ThetaHealing), one of the rules is not to mix or use other modalities while in there. So I started preparing what I’d say: “Trees help recharge our energy.” That’s it.
But that wasn’t even what she asked. She just wanted to know if I could already practice the technique without my mind wandering. And since another rule in the camp is no lying, I told the truth, “yes, my mind still wanders a little”.
“What’s that about?” she asked.
She smiled and said, “Okay, continue your dream house when you’ve completed the course.”
That day, I’ve kind of liking the technique already, I visualized a revision on my dream house, from having just a yoga/ work out room. I will have to replace it with a separate small meditation room and do vipassana with a husband, he either have taken the course or will do it after we met. That room can also be used for sound bath sessions with clients. The whole of our property has landscaping, surrounded by plants and little bamboo grasses (is it Japanese bamboo?). Good intentions right? Haha.
This was also the day that I’m able to sit still for the whole hr. and felt the effect of releasing Sankaras.
Apparently, the course makes lot of sense after that night’s lecture, questions like “is it science backed?” was answered. We were studying the Law of Nature of existence, impermanent and continuously changing, people dies and that’s part of “impermanence”, Anicca - arising and passes away. To those who’ve grieved and grieving, death is nature of human, all families have grieved the loss of at least a loved one. That teacher Goenka who has rediscovered this technique has a lot of stories that resonates, it struck my heart & soul, I was crying til next day’s morning sitting. (When we came out, and able to talk, I’m glad to found out that I wasn’t the only one crying). I felt a lot of gratitude too and so glad that there was a podcast that brought me there and knowing her past, well, we can cry together.
Day 7-8, lots of trying and challenging myself for 1hr stillness and if there are Pros, there are cons.. I started to have some negative thoughts about it, in my head, well, at least I got to see how it works.
Day 9, got back to the determination, because of all the hard, this technique is actually the easiest. And the compassion they put in to this course is extremely commendable, the teachings are invaluable, it can worth a hundred thousand, but it is FREE! Really have released the Sankara of Craving for money, but money still comes to them from donations to sustain the next students’ needs. EVERYONE IN A GOVERNMENT SERVICE NEED TO ATTEND THIS COURSE! Another purpose is to dissolve ego, since it is free, no one can complain about the foods, whilst if it paid, someone could complain about the value for money. Such a work of COMPASSION and LOVE. So compassionate they recommend not to kill insects while we were there.
DAY 10, Shock absorber. Noble silence was lifted, but noble chattering. FINALLY! We also had photos taken and another meditation was taught (short one).
Photo by Dhamma Phala Facebook
DAY 11, 4:30 am group sitting and last lecture. Bfast and cleaning the area.
There! This is actually my experience being in there, not really telling the whole technique cause YOU HAVE TO EXPERIENCE VIPASSANA for yourself. I decided to continue to meditate at home 2x a day, to make best use of this technique and of that 10days. This is a self work and no one can help you being out of miseries than yourself.
Purpose of Vipassana Meditation
This practice is to eradicate one’s miseries by releasing 2 roots of it “cravings and aversion”, if you analyzed those words, true enough, if you crave, you’ll cling, you’ll get attached, have fear of losing, etc. Conversely, aversion may create anger, hate, resentment, etc. Absolutely! These are right! Do you agree?
More practice gives best result.. leading to “enlightenment”! I always thought enlightened person is dead cause it is the highest in the scale of human vibration. “Fear” being the lowest. But as the teacher said, they don’t talk like that, this teaching is more about reality, present moment, seeing things as it is = Vipassana.
New good sleeping pattern and getting up early
I felt lighter, like 12–13 hours of fasting had my stomach rumbling ate off my side fats.
The fresh air, the relaxing sound of nature and random animals. I loved it sooo much!
Met new spiritual sissums.
I am healthier, kinder, smarter and a better version of myself.
So proud of me! I did it!
