Real Problems of Storybrooke

But three years are nothing compared to the one before it. Time has a different meaning now.

Another year, another interview, and again they ask you. Are we going to see Neal again? Is he alive? Is he coming back? Henry mentioned his name and he wouldn’t have done that if he wasn’t coming back, right?

Someone eats a bagel on-screen. This must be significant. Is he coming back?

You feel like you have been here before. You can’t shake the feeling. You say no, he is dead.

Time passes. The show goes on. The story progresses. The fandom clamours for scoop. They want scoop. They need scoop. #nospoilers, you say in desperation, but you can’t stem the tide. Scoop, they chant. Give us scoop. Give us spoilers.

Are we going to see Neal again?

No, you say, he is dead.

He said no, they say. That must mean something. He must be hiding something. There are clues hidden in Emma’s blouse, or maybe her boots, or her hair, or her eyelashes. There must be a reason why she wore a cream-coloured top. Cream cheese is a popular topping for bagels. This must be significant.

They want to ask you a question. You agree, and forget to brace yourself, because three years have passed.

But time has a different meaning now. Your words have different meanings now. They are no longer your words. They fall on deaf ears. They fall and trip and become something else along the way. They must mean something.

Are we going to see Neal again?

You want to say no. You hesitate. You are no longer sure that the word means what you think it means. You are no longer sure who Neal is. You are no longer sure that we will not see him again. He is persistent. His ghost is everywhere. You no longer control your words.

You say no anyway. Nobody seems to hear you. They ask again. Are we going to see Neal? Is he really dead?

You hope that you will not see Neal again.

…

can you imagine storybrooke issues being resolved this way

like, “hands up if you think we should definitely communicate with merlin via mushroom”

“who here thinks going to the actual underworld is a great idea”

“all in favor of naming this baby after an inappropriate dead pseudo-relation, say ‘aye’”

Real Problems of Storybrooke is pleased to publish a guest editorial by a visiting scholar on the state of Storybrooke’s educational system:

Dear Readers –

Over the years of my employment in the field of education, I have born witness to numerous educational policies which have had varied effectiveness, which is why I am writing this editorial  - to express concern over what I see to be a series of decisions, made by the elite of this town, which I do not believe will benefit the students of Storybrooke. Though I am an outsider, I am not simple nor plain and I believe my experiences can shed light onto why parents must be cautious about the recruitment and hiring policies of the Storybrooke school district.

I started off my educational career as a glorified tutor who had to ensure that my young charge learned not only the fundamental skills of reading and writing but life skills as well. In order to fulfill this duty, I was taught that there is a difference between knowing a great deal about a subject, and knowing how to teach it.  Since my initial employment, I have spent considerable time enriching my understanding of pedagogy (a hobby I endeavored to cultivate in my free time after the demise of my marriage - ). 

That is why I write to you today: to caution you against allowing the aristocratic rulers of Storybrooke from unilaterally making hiring decisions based on perceived competencies and not actual pedagogical understanding.

As someone who has worked in teacher preparation, I can attest that all teachers must be proficient in general pedagogical knowledge – that is, understanding pedagogies and general strategies for teaching and learning – as well as pedagogical content knowledge, or the knowledge of pedagogy specific to subject areas.  As a former reading teacher, I know how to elicit understanding and teach students to read for comprehension.  I understand the importance of cognitive modeling through speaking my thoughts as I read, to teach my students how to identify main ideas and learn how to anticipate character growth.  I am adept at classroom management, a concern of paramount importance to most teachers and which I manage with considerable ease due to my training and experience. As such, I have been hired for my positions because of my exemplary abilities and my instructional acumen.

I cannot say the same for the newest science teachers at Storybrooke Junior High, nor the majority of the instructors that the administrator, Snow White, has brought on. I am deeply concerned that, by mistaking expertise for ability, students will suffer at the hands of poorly-prepared “teachers” who do not know how to manage their lives, let alone a classroom of seventh graders running amok.  Further, I am entirely sure that their lack of training and pedagogical understanding will result not in deep comprehension and knowledge acquisition but rather in superficial understanding for the sake of a grade. 

Parents of Storybrooke, though I do not belong to your ranks I implore you to make your voices heard at PTA meetings, at local assemblies, and wherever you can advocate best for your child.  We cannot allow the elites of this town to dicate all of our life choices any more than the currently do.  We must ask for equity in education, encourage our leaders to find suitable instructors for our children or, if not, participate in the licensure programs that ensure new hires receive proper training.

Our future depends on it.

Humbly yours,