Real Dad Tales @realdadtales - Tumblr Blog

so much for home fathering

•18+ Adults Only

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a guy at my school said if he wore his moms shirt he'd turn gay becsuse the shirt contains attraction to men. my friend and i realized a dad shirt would turn u pan, because all dads have different sexualities

all dads are sexually attracted to grills

my dad ate way too many spiders

your dad is an outlier

audrocur-deactivated20221128

water sourced from free range dads

realdadtales

father: son, let us take part in this holy sacrament. I gift to you my purest water. drink from my glass, son. be filled with the fatherly purity

me: thanks dad

#real dad tales #dad's pure water

officialunitedstates

george washington: [chops down the cherry tree]

georgrers’s dad: son did you chop down the cherry tree

george warsh: yes

gergeory’s dad: nice you should be president from 1789 to 1797

georgere: will do, pops

realdadtales

real dad tales from history

#real dad tales

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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writing-prornpts

hey son! it’s your dad… how ya doin sport? your mom say anything about me?

realdadtales

father: son I am miss your momther so munch.... I miss the way should would implant eggs into my eyes and mouth.... I miss her hundreds of eyes... son :(

me: thanks dad

#real dad tales #real dad tale

writing-prornpts

you were raised by a swarm of 48 dads. you accidentally bring home a copy of Decks Illustrated

realdadtales

fathers: SSSZZZZZzzZZSSOOOONNNISSSSSSTHAAATTTTTMMMMMAAAAGGAAAAAZZIZIIIIIINNNNNEEEEEYOOOOOUUURRRRSSSSSS?????????????? MAAAAAYWEEEEBORROROOWORITTTTT???

me: augh god no please don’t crawl under my eyelids again

fathers: OHHHHHT:ANNNNK YOUUUUU SSSSSSSSSSOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNN OEUUURRRR GOOOOOOD SSSSSSSSSSOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNN

me: thanks dads

#real dad tale #real dad tales

onlyonereason-deactivated201909

realdadtales

which is the real tale, dad? WHICH IS THE REAL TALE?????????

#real dad tales

dekutree

realdadtales

father: son you must channel your dark and twisted powers and end your opponent's life. strike him down son!!! slay him, and claim your birthright!!!!!

me: I Will! Thank You, Father

#real dad tales

robo-otter-blog

realdadtales

me: I am failure

fafthger: hi failure im dad

me: thanks dad

#real dad tales

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions

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father: son do you want to drink from my pouches. they are so sweet and refreshing. please drink from my pouches son

me: thanks dad

#real dad tales

royaldandellion

Happy Father’s Day to all! lets all hug our dads! But becareful not to break them!

realdadtales

father: they thought I died... part of me did...

me: winky face

#real dad tales #overwatch #overdad

The latest Tweets from Real Dad Tales (@realdadtales). real tales, real dad

these tale’s are now on twitter

#real dad tales

realdadtales

father’s day real dad tale for you folks

father: son, my father used to smonk a pipe. he would sit in his study after work at the job factory and smoark on that pipe, making big puff clouds of ash and terrible smell. his study smellt of death son. be grateful that my vices are limited to pink floyd and vaping

father: [hits vape so hard it shorts and sputters]

father: [coughs]

me: thanks dad

realdadtales

forthers day has come and gone but this dad tale is eternal

#real dad tales

obviousplant

realdadtales

when shopping for dads be sure to find the ones who look like they have a lot to say. they will have the most potent real dad tales.

realdadtales

Gary: has the best tales of growing up as a child

Manuel: has the best crazy stories

Xavier: most real talk, has seen some shit

Pete: best "dad jokes" (not jokes about dads)

Ahmed: knows many parables, a good moral character

Darren: politically motivated, good at lecturing

Carlos: conniving, not good with dad tales

Bryce: something tells me he's not the father

#real dad tales

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions

Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

NOT A REAL DAD TALE BE CAREFUL

NO THANK YOU DAD

#not real dad tales

slutsanduppercuts

realdadtales

father: son, have you ever wondered what daddy’s strange smoke wand is used for? son I must tell you now. son, your father vapes. vaping saved my life, son. this vape is our family Pride

me: thanks dad

#real dad tales #my father's vape #vape dad #don't judge my path

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