read by mysia

When reading Murakami, I find it crucial to keep an open mind and abandon everything you have ever thought you knew about how a plot is going to develop and come to a head. DDD is, I believe, the third Murakami novel to work its way into my collection and definitely not my last as by reading this I was once again whisked away to the world of magical realism so expertly created and so wonderfully enticing. From the frozen corners of Japan to the beautiful scenery of Hawaii, Murakami takes the reader on a journey of discovery and quiet adventure, every action, every move and every interaction seeming to be perfectly ordinary but always with the question, will he (the narrator) find Kiki?

On the topic of Kiki, I am in awe how someone can write a book with so much going on (psychic 13 year old, magical sheep man who lives in a hotel) and yet probably the biggest question being asked is “is he going to find Kiki” just for (spoiler alert) his friend to kinda confess to killing her, which he totally did in my opinion, but “can’t remember” because the trauma of what he has done has repressed the memory of his actions. Kiki remains as elusive as your house keys when you’re trying to find them right before you’re supposed to leave the house and yet that is what propels the novel because no matter what he does, the nameless narrator is always on the search for her. Of course more questions come to mind other than just Kiki. For example, the artist mother of the psychic 13 year old - how has she not lost custody? She effectively abandons her underage child at every turn and the narrator comes in as some babysitter turned friend. Then there is the sheepman. Is he real? Is he the narrator’s subconscious? He seems to be part of some sequel of Murakami’s but I haven’t the energy to read into it. Then the dark room with the skeletons? So. Many. Questions.

All these questions but the most memorable moment of the novel to me was when Kiki and the narrator ‘reunite’ and it’s like the feeling of all the pieces sliding into place to come to the final conclusion - the narrator fears losing someone close to him and has never cried for the people he lost so he has just been living with this incredible amount of repressed grief and the whole time this is where the story was headed.

This is a book that was gifted to me by a close friend over a year ago and in recent weeks I finally sat down and devoted myself to reading it after, admittedly, not having picked up a book in near enough probably two years (life always finds a way to take up time). Having never read anything by de Beauvoir before but hearing high praise of her work I was very excited and intrigued to dive into this book and oh my goodness it did not dissapoint!

Just from the introduction and foreword alone I was immediately captivated and steamrolling through the book, unable to remember the last time a piece of literature had captivated me so quickly. The story of two girls growing up and growing apart is one that is such a monumental experience, I believe, in any young persons life as it serves almost like a rite of passage into adulthood; a reminder that the people who you were once so devoted to will always be loved by you but it's okay to let go of that devotion and let life happen without completely abandoning the other person.

What made the book so enjoyable and easy for me to read was how real it felt and how I felt so involved in the storyline; I myself have, in my life, been in friendships where I felt utterly devoted to the other person, so much so that it pained me when something would happen to them, both good and bad, that was out of my control and that I couldn't participate in or remedy. I believe this is what made the character of Sylvie so real to me as I understood her yearning but also connected with her post outburst in Andree's kitchen when it seemed like a weight had lifted off her shoulders and she was able to continue with her life still being Andree's friend but not being weighed down by the devotion she had previously felt.

Even though it was told from Sylvie's POV and her POV was basically all Andree and how she was, how she looked, what she said etc etc now that I sit down to write this post, I genuinely can't come up with much to say about Andree, other than how sorry I felt for her and how I feel she died prematurely because she was just crushed by social expectation, her complicated relationship with her faith and those around her, particularly her mother, and of course the see-saw of her relationship with Pascal.

All in all, throughout the novel, both girls were constantly on a journey of self discovery or as much self discovery as they were able to do given the time in which they lived and for that I admire them. They lived in a difficult time and I truly believe they did the best with what they had and while life grew more difficult as they got older that is simply the way things are, both in this novel and in real life and ultimately the best we can do is our best, and we should never forget the importance of having someone to lean on rather than trying to shoulder all the burden ourselves.