SUPERNOVA

RACHEL: Marley !! I have just been hit by a tremendous and overwhelming urgency to be your musical mentor and guide you back into the world of song writing.

The smell of coffee filled the air as Rachel waited. Quickly spotting Hunter, Rachel raced to the queue, cutting in front of two annoyed teenagers. Hunter was a very hard person to catch. Rachel didn’t have any of his contact details and only recently followed him on Instagram. Back in high school, the pair didn’t interact much either. In truth, Rachel was always confused by him. His cold demeanour, the fact that he seemed to dishearten her at every interaction. The way he performed being  so clean.The past few interactions they shared since proved much about the detective hadn’t changed. 

However, Rachel had set herself on a mission. Keeping friends closer but murderous enemies closer. Something about Hunter’s demeanour and detachment made him the most guilty in Rachel’s eyes. He was more than intelligent enough to find proximity to power and there was no telling what Hunter would do if he found about how Rachel, Ryder, Madison and Spencer fit into the puzzle. With those thoughts in mind, the star put on her brightest smile and flipped her dark hair.

“Hunter Clarington, Son of Eric and Mary Clarington. From Westerville. Harvard Alumni. Fan of Dermot Kennedy, the colour red, cats and an engaging game of chess. One of the more talented Warblers and I assume more of a Batman person than Superman.” Rachel stated beaming even brighter. Her tone was excited even songlike and her countenance was friendly. The barista dropped Hunter’s coffee and Rachel quickly picked it up. “I just realised that even though we were show choir rivals and hung out with the same people. We don’t know much about each other and I wanted to change that. Plus, the fact that we are both wonderfully placed in the Big Apple means we could have quite a lot in common. I checked Instagram yesterday and I saw we had a couple of mutuals. I assume you know Brenda because of Annabel? Who is stunning by the way. I think I may have interacted with her at some parties but you know I get so many people coming to talk to me back in New York that I can’t quite place an actual conversation.”

Rachel kept hold of Hunter’s coffee and ordered her own. Taking both in hand, she walked to a nearby table. Motioning for Hunter to accompany her. “So tell me, how is wedding planning going?”

The two of them couldn’t resist the moment. Finn had known that since the first kiss in the auditorium. They always got swept up in their emotions and it was because of that that Finn knew things with Rachel would always be different. She would always be something more, somewhere in his heart that no other woman would ever reach. And once more, they were getting swept up in the moment. The moment of his confession, of the ache between them to let everything spill.

Her touch sent shockwaves through his body again. Her touch couldn’t be compared to anyone else’s. He’d been intimate with other women, had connections and fun but this here - it was only her touch that could put him into an out of body experience. 

It was her pleading that did him in. Finn couldn’t keep the walls and secrets up, not when it was hurting her like this. The Ten had made a pact, and there was no doubt that Santana and maybe even Quinn would kill him if he was the one to break it. This was what Rachel was asking of him. The truth of why he ran away and never came back. And the truth he offered instead just revealed the depth of how much he still held for her.

It was serious and tense and in the turn of a second, Finn was laughing and shaking his head. That was on him though for not realizing that if the response wasn’t “I know”, it would have been a million questions.

“ It was opening night. “ He said with a chuckle, trying to fight back the waves of feelings over the fact she had saved that seat for him. She did love him still. She had felt the same, even all these years later. It made his choice that much harder and easier. What she was pleading for, it wasn’t for that dumb love confession. She knew he loved her still. She needed the truth and she maybe even knew exactly what kind of truth she was asking for from him. And if Finn wanted them to have a shot at love, he’d have to give the truth. Just then, just maybe, they’d have a chance to be in love in public.

Crap. Public. Public like the bar stools they were sitting on having this conversation. The way she had been pleading broke all his walls down and he was ready to spill it all. This wasn’t just any bar. It was Scandals and there was no doubt that Karofsky would find about Finn’s confession if he kept talking.

Swallowing hard, Finn took a deep breath, suddenly centering himself and realizing the cost of what started as a casual conversation. Disentangling himself from Rachel, already missing that touch for just a moment, Finn stood. Wordlessly, he entwined their fingers and silently asked for her trust to just follow him.

Weaving through the crowd, Finn reached the back door and pushed it open, checking it was empty and letting out a small sigh of relief as it was. In a smooth motion, Finn brought Rachel outside and brought her across the alley, letting the door slam shut. He spun her in front of him, pushing her gently against the wall and pinning her there with his own body. A hand rested on the brick at the side of her head and the other came to rest on hip, keeping her steady.

“ You might hate me. And you might be terrified and I can’t blame you for any of that. “ Finn said, swallowing again as he shook his head, his eyes locked down on her. “ I think it’s really obvious I still got stupid big feelings for you. Like love feelings. But I can’t keep this secret anymore if it’s gonna cost me you. ” 

***

Taking in her surroundings, Rachel felt herself shiver. The air in the alleyway was colder than when she arrived at Scandals. She thought. How did she get here?  Silently panicking, Rachel realised the ramification of her actions. Her need to chase her wants regardless of the consequences had brought her to this very point. Seconds away from hearing a murder confession from the man she always loved.  Finn was so close, Rachel was sure he could feel her fast-paced heartbeats. 

Everything would change now. There would be no turning back. All her deniability would end here. The brunette’s mind was abuzz with different thoughts and different people. How would she explain this to Spencer? Would she have to tell Kurt? The future that she had sacrificed everything for, would it still stand? The plans and pursuits, how would they continue after this? The weight of the secret was pulling her down and simultaneously making her feel lightheaded. 

Finn’s words brought a wave of emotion to Rachel. In a better world, her eyes would have lit with happiness. Solidifying that happiness with a sweet kiss and more. However, the real Finn and Rachel were complicated, messy and scarred. Trying their best to hold on to their love even with all the darkness that surrounded them. Literally and figuratively. The brunette looked up and studied Finn. His expression, his demeanour. He was forever etched onto her heart. It was obvious that this confession was taking a toll on him. The urge to comfort him returns. Resisting every urge to hug and hold him. Rachel shut her eyes tightly, the wall felt even more uncomfortable to lay on like Rachel could feel every brick.

Like love feelings.

Let’s be clear, Rachel Berry had many strengths                 her blazing ambition, her determination, dancing, singing, acting, being a little psychic, the uncanny ability to know when a singer was off pitch and how to rejuvenate the chorus line               but none helped her like the strength Finn gave her in that moment. She wouldn’t make him suffer any longer, sure the brunette was filled with questions and curiosities but Rachel felt better knowing they could finally face all of this together.

Against all common sense and her own fears, Rachel quickly checked her surroundings. Thankful that Finn and Rachel were the only people around. It was fitting since she felt they were the only people in the world at that moment. Rachel kept her eyes locked on Finn. She gulped. “ I know what you did Finn.” Rachel let the words hang in the air.  Hands began to cup his face, searching for answers. ”I know you and everyone else killed Mr. Schuester. I saw. I was there. I have always known. I saw you do it first.” Leaving out the rest of the “Outsiders” on purpose. As much as Rachel would have loved to give Finn every part of the truth, she knew that some wasn’t hers to tell. “And I am scared and confused but even with this, and maybe I’m crazy but I still feel the same and I just want a great excuse or something to make it all okay and get away from all of this and you could come back to New York with me and we could get a happy ending.” Her words are quick and her voice was high pitched. Eyes watering slightly, Rachel continued. “Please say something.” Please make this okay.

Allow me to be the first to clue you in on a secret you’ve been blissfully sheltered from living in your bubble of Broadway dreams; belting your schnoz off in the “big” leagues won’t change who you are any more than it’ll change the fact that I’d rather be dead than live out my life Big Bird-ing it up in The Muppets Take Manhattan. 

The same way anyone with half a brain cell would come to realize that pretending this never happened isn’t the key to joint freedom from this hellscape. It’s not rocket science.

And while that line may have caused damage back in high school. I can happily confirm that I am more than content with being exactly who I am. I find it sad that you have stayed such an awful person. Also my schnoz is wonderfully formed and you don’t have the gravitas nor the panache for Broadway anyway.

Quinn: Hi Rachel

Quinn: You found it here? Well, I'd be happy to sign it for you.

Quinn: It was a memorial, those things tend to be awkward. Right, we're friends and friends have coffee together. I'll take the free coffee, but there's no need to make anything up.

Quinn: That is something I remember about you, and I know that's not great for your voice either, I on the other hand will be having milk. Hopefully that's fine.

Rachel: Okay, I might've gotten my housekeeper to send the copy since we are all stuck here for the foreseeable future.

Rachel: I just didn't know when next I would get the chance, if I would ever get the chance.

Rachel: Do you not usually have coffee with friends?

Rachel: No, I insist. It's just coffee and being a star does pay pretty well so I can afford it.

MARLEY: I haven't even thought about songwriting in so long so yeah I think we could do that. You have always been good at giving me inspiration.

MARLEY: Okay, good.

MARLEY: Hm I never thought of it that way. I guess because my mom never went out with her friends so I didn't have to worry about a babysitter. If you want to bring him something, you can but honestly it's not necessary. He understands that sometimes adults need to get out and sometimes he actually tells me that I need to go have fun.

RACHEL: Amazing !!!! You can come to the Berry Residence as soon as possible, bring pen, paper and all your creative energy. I will provide snacks and the best inspiration possible.

RACHEL: Do people question your parenting?

RACHEL: Okay, I will bring him something. What a bright and mature child! When I make my own little projects I hope they can be as sweet as that but knowing me, they would probably request duets before I leave the door.

RACHEL: Hello Quinn, this is Rachel B. Berry ⭐

RACHEL: I got your number from Kurt and I just wanted to say that I found my copy of your book and it would be my pleasure if you signed it.

RACHEL: I feel like the last time we saw I was so awkward and since we're friends now, I was thinking I could make it up by buying you a coffee.

The energy changed again. It was more charged, almost hotter even. Why did that always happen around her? That didn’t make sense. Finn watched, a bemused look puzzling his face as he watched Rachel take the shots so quickly before turning to him. Casual. Why was he this casual and why was he so surprised to be called out on it right now.

The words hammered his ears and almost in an instant, he deflated. She unnerved him, perhaps as much as he seemed to unnerve her. Why was he so casual? Because if he let himself take on the seriousness of his feelings for her or the weight of the murder around her, it would all fall apart.

With a heavy sigh, Finn hung his head and straddled the empty bar stool next to her. His body faced her side, a foot resting on the bottom bar of her own seat. “ Rach… ” Finn exhaled, his voice stripped down to its bareness, heavy with plea and begging. “ You don’t deserve it. ” His hand dropped to her knee, pulling slightly to turn her body to face his, a slight thanks sent up for spinning bar stools. Finn should have removed his hand but it stayed, fingers curling around the back of her knee, his thumb resting on the top of her knee, moving back and forth in a far too intimate gesture. The gays of Lima would be gossiping soon enough.

“ If I don’t stay casual, I’m afraid a lot more things are gonna come spilling out of my guts. “ He admitted, bringing his eyes to hers. “ I mean the memorial, it was a lot and then being in that auditorium with you and all of our history, I let some guts spill. “

This was too close, too comfortable. Finn’s mind was screaming to just tell the truth about Schue now that the police were far more involved. Then she could understand why he was such a dick in high school. Of course, that didn’t do anything about the now problem.

Finn lifted his hand from Rachel’s knee, coming up and brushing a strand of hair behind her ear, letting his fingers drop and trail along her jaw. Truth wasn’t all bad, no matter how much he had been outrunning it.

“ I saw you in New York. ” Finn said softly, the corners of his lips ticking upwards, “ Funny Girl. You were destined to be a star Rach. ” 

****

They were falling into old habits now.  His foot on her seat. His hand on her knee. The soothing motion. The ease of everything. Rachel’s face got slightly red. Brown eyes opened wider to put all her focus on him. “I don’t.” She agreed, her words coming out like a whisper. Rachel came closer, bending her knee so Finn’s hand could find a space closer to her thigh.

Hearing all the pain and begging in this voice, Rachel felt a pain in her chest. Rachel had to take some blame for them. She knew. She could have asked. Instead, she had been scared and chose her career over everything. Finn had left first but she let him go. All those times, she had pursued him and the one time he might have needed it most, Rachel set him free. Even now, a confession was dangling between them. Holding all the air in the room and bringing in a lot of heat. The brunette couldn’t play dumb for long.

She studied his features, his handsome face, the honesty of his voice.  The way he looked at her like she was the most special thing in the world. “I want things to spill.” Rachel’s tone was serious and her brows furrowed. She had a strange aching to comfort him. Putting her hands on his shoulders and circling them in a smooth rhythm. “The more I understand, the better.”  Perhaps things could be explained, perhaps there was something better in their future even in the midst of this horrible present. Eyes were starting to look but Rachel didn’t care. So much of their relationship was were  in the dark, now was the time they could be seen in the dimly lit bar version of the Light.

Rachel had never flinched at Finn’s touch. Being with him had always been a warm welcome and a passionate embrace. Her body missed it and it showed with the way she instinctively leant in. Her hands found his knee and she copied his previous motions. There wasn’t much though to any of this but Rachel always let her emotions get the best of her.

Every touch was felt with excitement. Her mouth opened in a dramatic ‘O’ at his confession. “You came to New York? You watched me? Which performance?” Rachel was more than surprised that Finn had cared enough to come all the way to New York. “I hope it wasn’t my tenth one because I had this really annoying cough the day before and I was seriously worried that my voice came out a little nasal.” It was the shock of the statement that made Rachel want to speak further yet she restrained herself. Eyes briefly stared at Finn’s lips. “I saved you a seat at my first one. It was stupid and I didn’t tell anyone I did. Not even Kurt. Definitely not my dads. I told them I just needed the space for my dead grandmother but it was actually for you. I really wanted you to be there.” Rachel admitted. And he was. “You’re a good guy, Finn.”

Rachel smiled. Against all her better judgement, Rachel placed his other hand on top of her thigh and her available hand at the back of her neck. “I just need to know.” The words were close to whispers, silently begging. Gazing into his eyes, they were so close they could kiss.  “ I just need to know…to understand…I mean I know…but I don’t know or understand and I want to more than anything....Please Finn.” 

MARLEY: Well, it was only one suggestion but I'm game for any others if you have them.

MARLEY: My mom has him with her on a weekend trip to a cabin so no I don't think he'll need something. I'm with him 24/7 so it's not like one night away is going to hurt him.

MARLEY: Are you questioning my parenting?

RACHEL: Oh no, I would love to go to a club! Maybe we could spend sometime songwriting too? I feel like I am the perfect person to give you inspiration ⭐.

RACHEL: NOT AT ALL !!

Not to burst any of your “battle” bubbles, Wonder Dweeb, but are we absolutely certain you weren’t mistaken for one of the runners-up in Ru’s latest season of Drag Race? There’s a real uncanny resemblance there, and I know from personal experience that those man hands can be highly deceiving. 

Hot tip: avoiding the elephant in the room altogether is, like, infinitely more suspicious. Especially when the elephant winds up dead. 

Honestly Santana, how ridicolous of me to think that you would have grown up by now. Your immature jokes mean absolutely nothing and are a very ill conceived attempt to hide your envy for me.

How interesting that you know. I wonder how a plastic surgeon could have gathered that knowledge?

MARLEY: Let's go out. Hit up a club or like do something.

MARLEY: You game?

RACHEL: I never took you as much of a clubbing person but I would gladly take a night off to blow up some much needed steam!

SPENCER: "Pecuilar" and "cold" aren't the words I'd use to describe Dickbag Claringdouche. Try "fucking" and "stupid."

SPENCER: He acts so high and mighty when he couldn't even find friends at his own school so he had to come steal ours. What a loser.

RACHEL: I take it that you and him are not the warmest of friends right now?

RACHEL: Please do not aggravate him further, Spencer. We are on the thinnest of lines already. Besides I plan on entering my more sinister personality traits to fix this.

KURT: Personal conflicts? Elaborate.

KURT: Unless that personal conflict is just about Finn because that’s not remotely shocking. Was this serenade warranted or random because you have a history of breaking out in song at inappropriate moments.

KURT: I’m getting around. Friends? That’s surprising. I guess death is a bonding experience.

KURT: It was just a turn of phrase. An old flame would require something having ever happened and it hasn’t and it likely won’t be. He doesn’t see me that way. It’s just a friend thing, I think.

[ typing..retyping...typing retyping...typing]

RACHEL: I can't elaborate more but Finn is part of it.

RACHEL: Unwarranted! Which made it even better and thus even worse. I feel like a teenage girl.

RACHEL: I know! I don't think Mr.Schuester has much to do with it. It's probably just what happens when you grow up and see the world. She even saw one of my Funny Girl performances.

SPENCER: I've been thinkin' on what you said at the memorial about us being "on the same team."

SPENCER: We need to close ranks. Shit's getting serious. Interviews with the fuzz. Karofsky strong arming everyone into staying in town. Recruiting Clarington to work on the case. They've got one of their own on the inside now. How sketch is that?

RACHEL: I completely agree, now more than ever.

RACHEL: You know how I was a little psychic back in high school? I feel like i have tapped more into my abilities as I've gotten older and I have always thought Hunter Clarington was peculiar and cold. I'm going to do some sleuthing.