to look at the wreckage left behind in his home , nikolai felt something unholy shudder inside of him. it was of a melancholy nostalgia, with the hairs on his arms raising the longer he thought about all that had been sacrificed in the pursuit of vainglorious pride. 

in the next movement , the king felt his heart cascade down like the first leaf of autumn─and so terribly , terribly , alone. nikolai dared not even give his fears a name , or thought. he knew there was something roaring to claw its way to the surface , but to name it would be to give 𝐈𝐓 power. 

then came a warmth , even if the sun had long set ── prevalent in the presence of  H E R. just like the sun , she was able to shine at the shadows , to usher them away with so much a gaze: Nikolai envied that. consequently , he began to wonder if he seeing himself as small was a sign of something being terribly wrong and ill with him . . . but he wouldn’t entertain that possibility. ❝ AND SO , the lady of the hour makes her appearance , at long last ! I was beginning to think you had stood me up , you know.  ❞

the frost of the night was nothing new in ravka , but it seemed to nip at his cheeks and bare ankles more than ever when the king of ravka was left to his own devices. the moon was the same as ever , as was the flood of trees lining the horizon surrounding the capital. his mind did a double-take on his thought of the  opalescent deity of the night skies , feeling a yearning and warmth in his sternum as a familiar face came to mind. 

nikolai had a myriad of little habits when his mind was set on turning its gears--his gaze came sharper then , even if he was momentarily distracted with thoughts of his friend. the frost surrounded him like a shawl , tighter still as he felt more a stranger in his home country than ever before.  however , whenever certain people came around , one would feel less isolated. . . cherished , even.

❝─𝖂𝖊𝖆𝖐𝖓𝖊𝖘𝖘 𝖎𝖘 𝖆 𝖌𝖚𝖎𝖘𝖊. ᴡᴇᴀʀ ɪᴛ ᴡʜᴇɴ ᴛʜᴇʏ ɴᴇᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ'ʀᴇ ʜᴜᴍᴀɴ, 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝒏𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒘𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒇𝒆𝒆𝒍 𝒊𝒕. ❞

In the realm of Final Fantasy X , Nikolai inhabits the fayth of the banished aeon , Diabolos. This heavily embodies @killthebxy‘s canon with their respective Final Fantasy X verse , but separate threads can be requested.

In his time on Spira , Nikolai was the young ruler of an imperial nation that stretched from the lands now known as Guadosalam to the shores of Mushroom Rock. In a time where magic encompassed Spira in every fiber of their being , Nikolai’s nation was thriving with summoners and pyreflies alike , with those that could cast , transcending even death. Their lives spent on Spira merely continued in the Farplane , when borders between the two remained stable. However , the body that would soon become the nation of Yevon opposed the unlimited and unfettered power Nikolai’s realm held. It was this greed for power that soon sparked a war between the two , and the downfall of a great civilization and their king. Summoners that betrayed and defected Nikolai would soon start up the foundations of Yevon and their beliefs , including imprisoning these powerful spirits in stone which would later become the fayths of lore. 

It was a cruel practice that required the cost of a summoner’s life in order to call upon these divine beasts called aeons , and there were many famed ones that lost their names long before later civilizations arose in technological advancements. As tensions flared and reached a standstill between the nation of summoners and that which sought to control them through a systematic belief system of manipulation , Nikolai resorted to becoming a fayth in a last-minute effort to give his country the power they sought out for: that of Diabolos. This daemon was borne of eternal night , and terrified its adversaries. While the powers of summoners kept Nikolai’s legacy going long until after his death , Yevon was determined to take away the former king from the last connection they held onto the physical earth. Saboteurs were sent to the resting place of Nikolai’s fayth , attempting to steal it back to Yevon so that the power of the Diabolos could be harnessed for their respective summoners. However , a strong series of storms stalled the hauling of the fayth , and with the many attempts of thievery from the thieves , it ended up being lost and washed in the basins of Mushroom Rock. For eons , this fayth was forgotten to the records of history , letting the leader who once led a nation of summoners slumber for eons.

In the current present of Final Fantasy X , It’s after Sin’s appearance on Mushroom Rock , post the joint-operation between the Crusaders and the Al Bhed failed horrendously washed up on its shores. The millennia which passed from Nikolai’s time preserved the fayth , but had melded the borders between vessel and aeon. From his awakening and rebirth , Nikolai was aware he was the monster , and the monster was him.