Raven

Helloooo!

Here is a little bit about me. I'm currently in that scary bracket between 35 and 40. Trying not to think about it too much...

I go by all pronouns (She/He/They) depending on the day and brain space. Most of my friends and family stick to They as apparently it isn't always easy for them to guess based on my, as I believe, very cool dress sense!

I am fully on the spicy brain spectrum, so when I think about the fandoms I'm in, I suddenly realise I have a lot of hyperfocus fandoms and ships, but I am super okay with that.

A few of them though are: Supernatural; Marauders, with a touch of Drarry; Helleva Boss and Hazbin Hotel; The Starless Sea; Hunger Games; SJ Maas Universe; Rebecca Yarros Universe. I'm sure I'll add more as I remember them!

I am currently writing fics for Marauders and Destiel. I possibly will write some Drarry in the future, but nothing concrete yet. Keep watching this space.

I love being in these fandoms, but am very aware of the stigma that comes with being anyway connected to the Harry Potter world. To be very, very clear: FUCK "JAKE HAY ROWLING"! I do not endorse her in anyway. Which is why I am more than happy to make every single character in the HP universe queer in some way!

My music taste is extremely varied, but like any good queer human, I love David Bowie, Blondie, Brandi Carlile, Taylor Swift and Amy McDonald, The Last Dinner Party, Wet Leg and Self Esteem. But will listen to pretty much most genres and artists. I'm always on the lookout for recommendations.

I do have an AO3 and I will start posting my micros and long-form stories there. There will be a fix of ratings and warnings, as I do enjoy delving into the more explicit details from time to time. If you fancy it, drop on by and if you feel so inclined, leave some kudos and/or a comment. You can find me at:

I think that's probably enough to ramble on about for now, but the above is gonna change as I find more things to hyperfocus on!

If you wanna drop me a question, or just say hi, feel free. I love interacting with like minded, Tumblr weirdos.

First, Previous

“Alright, Pete.” James called out to the man in the barbeque truck.

“Jay! Two secs.” The man called back as he finished serving the people in front of them.

“Pete makes the best ribs, I swear, you won’t have tasted anything better.” James bragged and Regulus caught the blush on the other man’s face, though he was trying to hide it as he talked to the customers.

“Oh, I will be the judge of that.” Remus licked his lips salaciously and Sirius made a noise that made Regulus want to retch.

“Absolutely fucking not, Sirius. Don’t ever make that noise in front of me again.” Regulus demanded, much to everyone else’s amusement.

“Jay and friends.” The man, Pete, called to them as the women moved on. “Didn’t know you were gonna be here today. You seen your folks?”

“Yeah, we popped by a minute ago. These are the teachers I was telling you about, from my new school.” Remus and Sirius waved and greeted Pete and Regulus tried to match their energy, but as with James’ parents, he wasn’t sure how best to react. “This is Sirius, Remus and this,” James held his hand tight. “Is Regulus.”

“Ohhhh,” Pete smirked. “Yeah, yeah I totally see it. Total smoke show.”

Regulus choked and James looked mortified.

“Well, fuck, thanks for that mate.” James grunted and then tried to change the subject. “What’s everyone having?”

The rest of the afternoon passed by in a whir of laughter and stolen kisses that tasted faintly of barbeque sauce.

Regulus felt like he was a teenager again, running around with boys behind his parents back. Causing trouble with his big brother.

“You okay, love?” James asked as he wrapped an arm around Regulus’ shoulder and pulled him close.

“Yes, just thinking. I’m having a lovely time.” Jesus Christ. Why was he now acting like he was in some period drama. “Sorry. I don’t know why I said it like that.”

“I think it’s sweet. I like the way you talk when you get all nervous.” James teased.

“Oh, joy. If I’d have known just how like my brother you are, I would have found it easier to avoid you.” Regulus bit back his smirk and watched as James tried to search his face for the truth.

Years of lying to his parents made him a little too good at keeping the truth from his face. It had cost Barty and Evan quite a few hundred pounds before they stopped letting him play poker with them.

“Did you really try to avoid me this week?” James had stopped moving and Regulus had taken a few steps before he realised there was no arm on his shoulder.

“James?”

“Regulus,” James looked worried. “I’m sorry if I made you feel like you had to come out with me. If I’d realised you,” James paused and Regulus started to panic. “I know I can be too much-”

Regulus rushed forward and grasped James’ face in his hands. “No, James. No. I’m sorry. I was just messing with you.” Regulus kissed him quickly before he continued. “I was only trying to avoid you because of how much I bloody fancy you and it scared the living daylights out of me how much I wanted you. That first day at the pub, I was trying to test the waters, see if you were even into men, but then you took that call and my brain went into overdrive and I convinced myself that you were married. That’s why I had to avoid you, not because I didn’t want your attention, but because I craved it.”

“Are you sure?”

“One thousand percent!” Regulus pushed up on his tiptoes and pulled James into a searing kiss. One that was returned with fervour.

First, Previous

Sirius was indeed extremely overdramatic about the whole thing and Regulus rolled his eyes more than once at his ridiculous older brother.

“Sirius, will you bloody well calm down. It’s not like I’ve never kissed a boy before.”

“Yes, but this is different!” Sirius exclaimed as he flung in his arms into the sky.

“How?!”

As he continued to argue with his brother, he became aware of whispering and low laughter to his left. Looking at James and Remus, Regulus could see the amused, guilty looks on their faces.

“What are you gossiping about?” Regulus demanded, inadvertently cutting his brothers rant short.

“Nothing, sweetheart.” The smile that James wore was beautiful and for a minute, Regulus was mesmerised by it.

“No, wait,” he said shaking his head. “That’s my trick and I’m not gonna fall for it.”

James kissed him on the forehead. “Worth a shot.”

“Reggie’s right. What were you talking about?” Sirus poked Remus as he spoke and Remus just swatted him away as he spoke.

“I was merely commenting on how alike you two are.”

“And?” Both brothers said at the same time, eliciting more laughter from the other men.

“Fuck you, both of you.” Regulus mumbled as he crossed his arms and sulked.

James wrapped him in his arms as the conversation carried on and eventually Regulus relaxed into his chest, enjoying the warmth and safety he felt there.

A short while later, Remus clapped his hands together. “Right, you,” he nudged Sirius’ shoulder. “Time for us to be getting home. That chicken isn’t going to cook itself.”

Sirius got to his feet and gave Regulus an odd look. One Regulus knew very well and so he got to his feet too.

He pulled his brother to one side and turned their backs so he could talk to Sirius privately.

“Siri,” Regulus started but he was cut off.

“It’s alright, Reggie.” The forced smile was not convincing.

“No, Sirius, it’s not. I really am sorry I forgot about family dinner. It was a douche move.”

“You were just excited.”

“Yeah, but that’s not an excuse. You’re my brother. You’re more important than some guy.” Sirius gave him a real smile this time and Regulus matched it. “I want to go to this event with James tonight and I also want to spend time with you. So, why don’t you and Rem come to this thing too and I’ll come over for dinner tomorrow?”

“I wouldn’t cramp your style?”

“Of course you would, but I still want you to come anyway.”

“Dick.” Sirius chuckled as he shoved his little brother. “Alright. If Rem is up for it, then I’m in.” Sirius spun around and shouted across the short distance. “Babe, we’re staying out. Chicken tomorrow instead.”

Regulus should have been surprised this was how his brother would check with his long suffering husband if he wanted to stay out, but he really wasn’t.

Remus smiled knowingly and nodded.

“You’re lucky he loves you so much.” Regulus observed.

“Oh, you have no idea, Reggie.” Sirius replied.

“Okay, so, who’s hungry? My mate Pete runs the barbeque hut.” James pointed backwards over his shoulder.

“Now we’re talking.” Remus rubbed his hands together gleefully. “Lead on, Macduff.”

First, Previous

James’ parents were lovely and they made Regulus feel very calm and relaxed around them. Monty told him all about the bees they had at home and how they only harvested a small amount of the honey to make their mead. Regulus was utterly fascinated by the whole thing.

As he was talking, he felt James edge closer to him and put a hand lightly on Regulus’ waist.

“Dad, mind if I steal Reg away?”

“Of course.” Monty smiled at his son and Regulus thought that something silent passed between them. “It was very nice to meet you, Regulus.” Monty held his hand out and Regulus shook it.

“And you, sir. Thank you for telling me about your bees.” Fuck sake, why did he sound like an excitable child. Regulus groaned internally at himself.

“My pleasure.”

“Don’t be a stranger.” Effie told him as she pulled him into a hug.

“Mum.” James huffed.

“Sorry, sorry.” Regulus didn’t think Effie was really sorry, but she was too nice for him to be angry at her for hugging him and she did give very nice hugs. “Jamie, before you go, will you be over this week?”

“Yeah, course. Is Wednesday alright? Harry wants dad’s help with a project for his geography class.”

“Perfect. We’ll see you then.”

Regulus stood to one side as James hugged his parents and Regulus gave them a small wave and smile as they walked away.

“Sorry about them.” James looked a little embarrassed as he rubbed at the back of his neck and Regulus was charmed by the moment.

“Don’t be.” Regulus reached out and took James’ hand as they continued to walk, delighted with the grin it brought to the taller man’s face. “They were lovely.”

“Oh, they’re the best.” James agreed enthusiastically. “I just wasn’t planning on introducing them to you.”

“Oh.” Regulus couldn’t say why it felt like the bottom had dropped out of his stomach. “Sorry, I shouldn’t have dragged you over to them.”

James stopped them in their tracks, much to the annoyance of the people around them who nearly walked into them.

“Reg, no, that’s not what I meant.” James cupped one of his cheeks. “I’m glad they got to meet you, clearly they already know about you.” Regulus huffed a laugh. “What I meant was, I didn’t mean to introduce you to my parents an hour and a half into our second date and less than 30 minutes after you realised it was a date. Lily often accuses me of having zero chill, but that would be a bit too fast, even by my standards.”

“I see.” Regulus stepped forward and wrapped his arms around James’ waist. “I guess I was too excited learning about the bees to actually realise how it might look you introducing them to me so soon.”

“Exactly.” James rolled his eyes in jest as his own arms snaked around Regulus’ waist. “I didn’t know they were planning on being here today, or I would have suggested something else.”

“Really, James, it’s okay.” Regulus tipped up and lightly kissed James. “Besides,” Regulus smirked. “Your dad is hot, so it was definitely a bonus.”

“Oi!” James pinched Regulus’ side and Regulus actually giggled.

“What in the fuck nuggets am I looking at?”

The shocked exclamation had them both jumping and they looked around to see Sirius and Remus standing near them. Sirius’ mouth was hanging open as he took in the view in front of him, but Remus looked incredibly smug.

“Fucking finally.” Remus chuckled. “So, is this what you needed rescuing from? James’ lips?”

“Fuck off, Lupin.” Regulus muttered as he buried his head in James’ shoulder and all three other men laughed heartly.

“Come on, let’s go celebrate this joyous occasion with a drink and you can tell us all about how this finally happened. Sirius, close your mouth.”

Remus took Sirius’ hand dragging him off towards a drinks stall.

“So, needed rescuing, huh?” James teased.

“Only because I thought you had a family and that I was making a fool of myself and breaking my heart.” Regulus threw on his best pout and puppy dog eyes and, like it always did, it worked like a charm.

“Fuck, sweetheart, I’m so sorry I made you feel that way.” James bent down and kissed him with everything he had and stole Regulus’ breath in the process. “Come on, let’s go find your brother before he has a coronary.”

First, Previous

“Come on, there are some people I want you to meet.”

James moved to stand up, but Regulus pulled him back.

“Noooo.” He protested. “Can it wait? At least until Sirius gets here?”

“Why?” Suspicion was written all over his face as he posed the question.

“Well,” Regulus crawled back into James’ lap. “I thought maybe we could find a different way to kill time whilst we wait for Sirius and Remus to get here.” Regulus practically purred as he laced his fingers into the hair at the base of James’ skull.

“As tempting as that is, love. We are kind of exposed here and it is the middle of the day…” James trailed off and Regulus came back to himself.

“Fuck, you’re right. Sorry.” Regulus scooched backwards and scrambled to his feet, holding a hand out to James to help him up.

A small thrill went through him as James took his hand but didn’t let go once he was standing. Instead, adjusting the grip so they were holding hands properly.

“Oh, the honey people are back.” Regulus exclaimed as they walked back through the many stalls and James chuckled.

“The who?”

“The honey people. I wanted to speak to them earlier about their mead, but there was no one there.”

Regulus dragged James over to the stall so he could talk to the older couple currently manning it.

“Jamie, what are you doing here?” The woman asked as they reached the stall and Regulus halted his movements.

He looked up at James. “Jamie?”

“Reg, meet the honey people.” The grin that James gave him was laced with slight nervousness. “AKA, my mum and dad.”

“This is him then, eh?” The older man asked and he had a voice as rich as James’.

Regulus found himself blinking as he looked at James’ father, taking him in. Regulus could see the family resemblance and holy shit. If this was James’ future, then sign Regulus up.

“I had the same reaction when I met Monty’s father.” James’ mother whispered to him and Regulus felt himself blush.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have,” Regulus stammered but the woman laughed warmly as she walked around to stand in front of him.

“Pish, don’t be so ridiculous, it’s only natural. Now,” she held her hands out to him and he took them. “Let me get a look at you.” She made him spin for her and then stared deeply into his eyes. “Oh, he’s a keeper.” The woman stage whispered over his shoulder and Regulus felt himself blushing harder, if that was even possible.

“Mum, leave him alone.” James chastised as he pulled Regulus into his side, but there was no real annoyance in his tone.

“I’m not doing anything.”

“Effie, James’ is right. Leave the poor boy alone.” James’ dad, Monty, added with his own chuckle. “Now, did I hear someone say, honey?”

First, Previous

“What?” Regulus’ voice shook. “But…I thought…” Regulus couldn’t quite articulate what he wanted to say. Sentences seemed beyond him in that moment.

“Reg,” James brushed a curl of his hair behind his ear and stroked his cheek. “Lily is my best friend, or at least one of them, but she isn’t my wife.”

“Who’s Harry?” Regulus did know some words it seemed.

James took a breath. “Harry is my son. Lily is his mum, but we haven’t been together since he was one. He’s almost twelve.”

“So, you’re…you’re not married?” Regulus repeated, the question coming out as a whisper.

“No. Not married.” James said almost as quietly.

The space between them felt like it was becoming non-existent, James was so close to him now.

“And you’re not seeing anyone?” Regulus knew he sounded desperate.

“Well, I sort of thought I was seeing you.” James’ admission made Regulus’ breath catch in his throat.

“We’ve only known each other a week.” He replied weakly.

“I know,” James’ other hand was on his other cheek, both thumbs tracing soft lines over his jaw line. “But I have taken you out twice.”

Regulus’ heart was pounding in his chest. “Oh.”

“Reg.” James’ lips were hovering so close Regulus felt the breath on his own lips. “I’m gonna kiss you now, alright?”

“Alright.”

When James’ soft lips met his own, it was like an explosion went off in his whole body.

The kiss started soft and gentle, but at the first lick of James’ tongue at the seam of his lips, the passion kicked up a notch. Regulus opened his mouth and their tongues were instantly entwined, fighting for domination over the other.

Regulus pushed back against James and crawled into his lap. James’ arms instantly wrapped around Regulus’ waist, pulling him impossibly closer.  Regulus wrapped his own arms around James’ neck and threaded his fingers into the unruly mess of dark locks. Tugging at it and causing James to moan into their kiss and roll his hips up. The noise and sensation made Regulus whimper as he rolled his own hips down.

His phone ringing jolted them both back to reality and they both laughed as they tried to catch their breaths.

Regulus picked his phone up and saw that it was his brother.

“Shit. It’s Sirius.” Regulus scrambled out of James’ lap and the other man laughed at him. “Hey, Siri.” Regulus answered, as he tried to control his voice and breathing.

“Reggie, what’s wrong? Why do you sound out of breath?” The concern from his big brother made Regulus feel a little guilty.

“Nothing, I’m fine, I promise. I’m good.”

“Alright, well, Remus is back and we’re heading to you now. We’ll be about half an hour. Googs says there’s a carpark where you are, can you meet us there?”

Double shit. He had forgotten begging his brother to come get him.

“Well, about that,” Regulus started.

“Fuck sake. Regulus Arcturus Black, if you have dragged me out of my house on a Sunday when I should be prepping dinner, I will kill you.” Remus scolded through the speaker.

Regulus gasped and threw a hand over his mouth.

“Did you forget about dinner?” Sirius sounded wounded.

“I did. But I have a legit reason, I swear.”

“What’s going on?” James asked, clearly thinking something was wrong, based on Regulus’ reactions to the call.

“Siri, hold on.” Regulus covered the speaker and held it away from him. “Would it be vastly inappropriate to include two more people in our party and turn this into a double date?” Regulus grimaced, but he needn’t have worried.

James just smiled gently at him. “Of course, love.”

“Siri, Rem, I’ll explain when you get here, alright?”

“This had better be good.” Sirius warned.

Regulus took James’ hand. “Oh, it is.”

First, Previous

Gods, Regulus had been such a fool! How had he let this happen?

Not only was James married, but he had a child! This explained the need for a bigger car. Regulus hadn’t noticed a car seat or any signs of a small child, which meant Harry was clearly old enough to not need a harness or booster.

Regulus walked quickly through the crowd and he thought he heard his name a couple of times, but it felt fuzzy, like it was coming from miles away.

He found himself drawing near to a building and he rounded it so he could hide from the people who must have thought him crazy as he practically ran past them all.

He leaned up against the wall to try and catch his breath.

It wasn’t James’ fault. He was just trying to be Regulus’ friend and here he was making everything awkward. He never should have let it get this far.

From now on, James would just be his colleague. He would be friendly with him, but only so far as their working relationship required. He could occasionally socialise with him, if he knew that there was going to be a group, but no more one on one dates.

Not dates!

“Idiot,” he muttered to himself as he felt tears welling up in his eyes. He felt his knees buckle and he dropped down the wall so he was now sitting on the ground and leaning against the warm brickwork.

Regulus pulled his phone from his pocket and sent a text to his brother.

You: Siri, are you busy? I need you to come get me.

He didn’t wait long for a reply.

Sirius Orion Black: What’s happened?? Do I need to hurt someone?? Where are you??

You: I’m fine, I’m safe and no you don’t need to hurt anyone.

You: I’ve been stupid and I need you to rescue me.

The typing bubbles flashed up a few times, but no reply came.  

You: Siri?

Sirius Orion Black: Sorry, just not sure if you’re fucking with me.

You: I’m being serious, Siri. Please?

Regulus felt the tears tracking down his cheeks.

Sirius Orion Black: Drop me your pin. Remus has the car right now, but he’ll be back in ten. Are you going to be okay?

You: Yes. I promise I’m not in any danger. Thank you.

Regulus shared his location with his brother and put his phone down as he hugged his knees tight to his chest and wept.

He was such a fool.

Here he was ready to parade around with James like they were some golden couple and all the time he was clearly taking advantage of a man who had a family.

Everything was so fucked.

“There you are.” A gentle voice made him look up and he bit down on his lip as he looked up at James. “Are you alright?” Regulus sniffed and James smacked himself on the forehead. “Clearly not, sorry. Is it alright if I sit with you?”

Regulus nodded and James sat down close to his side so that their shoulders were touching.

“What happened, Reg?”

Regulus knew he was biting his lip and cheek too hard, he could taste iron, but he also didn’t know how to tell James that he was sad at his own stupidity for letting himself start to fall for a married man. It was such a cliché.

“Reg, talk to me.” James encouraged as he reached over and took one of Regulus’ hands.

Regulus took a breath. “I’m fine.”

James used his pointer finger and thumb to tilt Regulus’ chin up so he could look him in the eyes. “Sweetheart, you’re sat behind the cricket pavilion crying and you ran away like you’d seen a ghost. You’re not alright and I want to help.” James continued to stroke his hand, but it was the use of a pet name and the gentle way James was now cradling his cheek that did it for Regulus.

“James, I don’t think I can do this.”

James gave him a confused look. “Do what?”

“This.” Regulus gestured between them. “I’m sorry.”

“Oh.” James looked crestfallen and Regulus didn’t know what to make of it. “If that’s what you want, then I will of course respect your decision.” James withdrew his hands but stayed close. “Can I ask one thing though?” Regulus nodded. “Why?”

Regulus took a moment to organise his thoughts before he answered.

“Because,” Regulus swallowed and James looked worried. This was it. He was about to lose James’ friendship, all because he couldn’t keep his stupid feelings under control. “Because I like you too much.”

James looked even more confused. “If you like me, then why wouldn’t you want to give this a go?” James asked sincerely.

“Because being your friend hurts too much. I want more and I know that it’s impossible and I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have let it get to this. I tried not to, I swear. I’ve always been too clingy. I’m sorry. I understand if you never want to speak to me again.” Regulus rushed out.

“Reg,” James breathed as he moved even closer and put a hand back on Regulus’ cheek. “Why is it impossible?”

Regulus reared backwards. “You’re married, James!”

James blinked a couple of times. “What?”

“I know about your wife. About Lily.” James laughed, actually laughed and Regulus was suddenly enraged. “What’s so funny about you suggesting I be your bit on the side?!”

“Reg, love, Lily isn’t my wife.”

First, Previous

Regulus’ phone buzzed with a text from James letting him know he was downstairs and Regulus had to stop himself from running down to the street from his apartment.

When Regulus did get downstairs he stopped and looked around but he couldn’t see James anywhere.

Regulus chewed nervously on his lip as he looked around and checked his phone again, just to be sure James had said he was here, rather than just on his way, or something.

A beeping drew his attention and he saw James waving at him from a different car than he had driven Regulus in on Friday.

It was still a fancy car, but it wasn’t the slick 2-seater Mazda Regulus had admired.

“Hey!” James called as he stood in the open drivers door of the Audi.

“How many cars do you have?” Regulus asked with a chuckle as he walked over.

“Just the two.” James shrugged as he got back in the car and Regulus joined him via then passenger door.

“If I’m honest, I think I prefer this one. There’s definitely a lot more room.” Regulus continued, as he looked around the interior checking out all the features and noticing how spacious it was.

“Oh, I see. So, you won’t mind if I only take you out in this car in the future?” James teased and something in Regulus’ chest caught.

Regulus didn’t know what to say, so he quickly changed the subject.

“So,” Regulus started. “Where are we going?”

“Well, there’s this farmers market on in my village I thought we could go to.”

“Oh my god, I love a farmers market.” Regulus exclaimed before he could stop himself.

“I thought you might,” James chuckled softly again and Regulus felt himself blushing.

They sat in companiable silence for a few minutes until James handed Regulus his phone.

“You can put something on if you want?”

Regulus was shocked. He barely knew this man and he was trusting him with his phone. Regulus desperately wanted to snoop through his photos, to see if he could figure out more about James’ wife, but he knew he would never break the trust that James had shown him.

Instead, he opened up Spotify and started to search for a few different songs to queue up. It turned out that they had fairly similar tastes in music, which was a nice surprise.

The drive took about 45 minutes, all in, and then James was leading them to the entrance of the market.

Regulus hadn’t been to one for years and he was having a wonderful time taking everything in. There were a number of stalls selling homemade delicacies, including one selling mead made from honey grown by the bees living in their own garden, but the stall was currently unoccupied and Regulus cursed his bad luck. He would circle back and hope the owners returned soon.

Regulus was talking to someone about the different chocolates they had for sale when he overheard a conversation that James was having with an older man who had just appeared.

“James, good to see you.” The unknown man said as he clasped James’ hand.

“And you Alastor. How are things?” James asked as he shook the mans hand.

“Good, good, can’t complain. How’s Harry?”

Oh, god. Who was Harry? Was Regulus just one of many. He was no longer listening to the chocolatier, which he knew was rude, but he needed to know.

“Err, yeah, he’s great.” James’ answer was slightly quieter than the start of the conversation and it felt like he was being cagey.

Regulus excused himself from the woman, currently explaining something about tempering methods to him, so he could listen to the conversation as he slowly walked over to join the two men.

“Excellent. I saw Lily yesterday and she said he was settling in nicely to his new school. Must be a big change for the little man.”

“James?” Regulus said loud enough for the others to hear and James spun on his heels so he was facing Regulus.

“Reg,” James began, but Regulus couldn’t hear him.

He took a couple of steps back. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt.” His mind was racing as he tried to work out how to escape. “I forgot I had something I needed to do. I have to go. I’ll see you at work.”

Regulus turned and walked away as quickly as he could without actually running.

First, Previous

Regulus woke up on Sunday in his own bed, hangover free and only a tiny bit disappointed.

He had gone out the night before with Bee and Ev, but he was back home and in bed long before the clock struck 12. He had tried to have a good time. He had tried to flirt with the guys who flirted with him. But when one guy did offer to take him home Regulus found himself declining.

It seemed his plan to get over James by hooking up with a stranger was never going to work, cause no matter how cute the other guy was, he wasn’t James.

Regulus laid in his bed staring at the ceiling and refusing to move until his bladder forced him up.

“Euuughhh!” He groaned as he dragged himself out of bed and into the bathroom, before starting his morning.  

As he waited for the coffee to brew, he stared into the fridge hoping for some kind of breakfast inspiration to jump out at him. He gave up trying to decide and grabbed an apple.

Today felt like it was going to be one of those days and he was already annoyed by it.

He started flicking through the many streaming services he was subscribed to, trying to find something mundane to put on when his phone rang.

Regulus stretched to grab it from the coffee table and his heart stopped.

James Potter

Why the fuck was James Potter calling him?

“Hello?” Regulus’ voice was still rough from sleep and disuse.

“Hey, I didn’t wake you did I?” James’ chipper voice came through the speaker.

Regulus cleared his throat. “Er, no, I’ve been up a little while. Is everything alright?”

“Yeah. I was just wondering if you had any plans today?”

“Me?” Regulus’ heart was definitely beating again, but now it was trying to beat out of his chest and he placed a hand over it as if he could stop it from bursting free.

“Yes you.” James chuckled beautifully. “Unless I called the wrong Regulus?”

“You know another Regulus?” Fuck sake. Regulus chastised himself. “You were joking.”

“Are you sure I didn’t wake you?” James’ voice was like honey and even when he was clearly laughing at Regulus’ expense, Regulus couldn’t bring himself to care.

“Yes, quite sure, but I’m only halfway through my first coffee of the day. I can’t be held responsible for my actions before at least my second cup.” Regulus joked back and James laughed again. “To answer your question, no, I don’t have plans.”

“Cool. There’s a talk on at the arts centre around the corner from me this evening on the history of witchcraft and women. The poster’s tagline says it’s a conversation looking at magic, rituals and the patriarchy. The speaker is Doctor Tabitha Stanmore. I’ve seen her speak before and she’s really interesting.”

“Is there a question in there, James?” Regulus teased.

“I was wondering if you’d want to go? And before you ask, yes, I mean with me, that we would go together.”

“What time does it start?”

“The talk doesn’t start till seven, but if you’ve nothing else on today, I thought we could hang out for a bit and then grab a bite to eat before the talk. I promise to have you home at a reasonable hour. I know how strict you are on not being out late on a school night.”

Regulus was touched by the thoughtfulness of James remembering that part of their conversation from Friday. Yes it had only been two days, but still, it had been a literal passing comment. He hadn’t expected James to remember it. It wasn’t like any of his friends or even his brother ever cared.

His mind whirred. Should he go out with James though? Why wasn’t he spending time with his wife? Maybe she was busy, maybe she would join them later. Regulus wasn’t sure how he would cope with that, but he had decided he wanted to be James’ friend and that would mean eventually spending time with his wife.

He’d get over his crush eventually. He had with Remus. Regulus shuddered when he remembered how he used to fawn over his now brother-in-law, a fact Sirius often liked to crow over him about.

“Reg, you there?” James’ voice drew Regulus’ attention.

“Sorry, yes, that sounds lovely.”

“Great!” James exclaimed. “Text me your address and I’ll come pick you up. Is eleven too early?”

Regulus checked the time on his phone, it was barely nine. “No, that’s fine, I’ll be ready.”

“Perfect. See you soon.”

Regulus hung up and text James his address before he could change his mind.

Then he ran for the shower and picked out an outfit. Something cool, but nothing that made him look like he was trying too hard.

Once he was happy with this choice, he got dressed and spent the next hour sitting and staring at the blank tv, waiting for James to come pick him up.

First, Previous

For a teacher, James drove a very nice car. Far more impressive than anything Regulus could afford on his salary.

When the radio came on Olivia Rodrigo blasted from it at a very loud volume and Regulus had to hold in a giggle as James smashed his hand against the radio to turn it off.

“Sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologise all the time, you know.” Regulus smiled at the taller man. “I won’t judge you for listening to a bit of girly pop. I think it’s refreshing.” James was looking at him funny. “What?”

“Nothing, just, thanks.”

“Alright.” Regulus felt the corner of his mouth pulling up in his confused state.

Why was James thanking him and why did he look so sad.

Fuck it.

“We should start a club.” Regulus said cheerfully as James pulled out of the carpark.

“A club?”

“Yeah. To unite against the stigma that middle aged men can’t love Gen Z girly pop music.”

“Middle aged?! How very dare you, sir! I am a spring chicken!” James exclaimed comically.

“A spring chicken of at least, what, 32?” Regulus asked with a smirk.

“What, did you look me up?”

Regulus blushed. “No! I’m just good at paying attention.” Regulus defended. “My brother is almost 32 and I inferred that you are of a similar age.”

“Well, for the record, you’re right. I am 32.” Regulus was pleased at his very accurate guess. “So?” James asked.

“So, what?”

“You know how old I am, but I don’t know how old you are.”

“It’s rude to ask.”

“Well, I don’t want to be rude.” James smirked as they pulled into the pub carpark.

Regulus had never seen anyone so beautiful as James Potter in all his life. Regulus was aware that he could very well be drooling, but christ, how could he help himself.

“I’m 29.” Regulus answered the earlier question.

“Wow, so a proper baby then?” James winked as he held the door open and it took every fibre of his being not to collapse and worship at this god’s feet.

He didn’t know what to say and so opted for silence. Merely chewing on his smile as he walked into the buzzing pub.

“It’s a bit busy,” Regulus said as he looked around for a free table. “I’ll understand if you don’t want to stay.”

“Nonsense.” James responded as he too looked around the room. “Look, there’s a free table.” James pointed to the back corner of the pub and in another heart stopping moment, took Regulus’ hand and dragged him over to the table.

Once Regulus was seated, James bounced off to the bar to order their drinks. Regulus watched him go and had to take a couple of calming breaths.

He took his phone out for something to stare at other than James and saw a few messages waiting for him.

One was from Barty and Evan asking if he was going to come out this weekend and one from Sirius reminding him they had family dinner on Sunday and to not be late. Like he ever had been. Regulus rolled his eyes and sent back a quick maybe to Bee and an acknowledgement to his annoying big brother.

“Got you a gin and soda, is that alright?” James asked as he placed the glass down in front of him.

“Great, thank you.” Regulus smiled nervously.

“So,” James started.

“You like that word, don’t you.” Regulus responded with a head tilt and a small smile.

“Yeah, I should probably find a better way of starting sentences.” James laughed and Regulus joined in.

“What do you want to know, James?”

“Anything you want to share. Where did you grow up? How long have you been teaching? When’s your birthday? Do you have a favourite colour?”

“Bloody hell,” Regulus choked on his drink, cutting James off. “I’ve got school friends who don’t want to know that much about me.”

“I’m an inquisitive guy.” James shrugged.

And for a moment, as Regulus decided which question to answer first, he was able to forget that James was married and he let himself believe that this could be the start of an excellent first date.