I NEED to get this out. @rainsterrants - Tumblr Blog

Hah,

Hahhhahhh

I.

I need to tear myself limb by limb

Cutting isn't working anymore.

Its not loud enough.

It isn't enough.

I need to see my bones break

I can't

Do this.

#vent #tw vent #Tw suicide #Suicide #Dismemberment

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I went a day without touching myself :D

kinda proud of that.

I broke my 84 day streak :3

#This sounds gross #But honestly being hypersexual sucks #I only had like 4 sexual thoughts

God life is so beautiful

Just had one of my favorite experiences ever

But

Why do I still want to die?

I should want to live.

I just had a meaningful experience.

Why do I still want to die.

#vent #tw vent

I want to be an adult so bad

I want to litter my arms with cuts as much as I want without the fear of parents finding out

#vent #tw vent #self harm

So I just finished cutting myself (DONT DO THIS. IM NOT GLORIFYING TS JUST DONT) and I started to bleed alot (i dont usually bleed.) And I forgot how sticky blood was honestly

#vent #self harm #self harm mentioned

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REMEMBER TO TAG YOUR VENTS. BECAUSE SOME PEOPLE DONT WANT TO SEE CERTAIN TOPICS AND ADD THAT TO FILTERED TAGS, W/O IT THEYLL SEE IT

#psa #suggestion #Do this #Please

Goddd I just relapsed but I want to relapse so bad

I have this restless feeling and gnawing feeling in my stomach that's telling me to cut myself.

I might just do it4

#Not promoting self harm don't do it it's not worth it in the end #tw self harm mention #self harm

I just don't trust any adults.

I hate them.

I hate it.

I HWTE IT.

Honestly school counselor??A BITCH. And WILL snitch.

Parents??? FUCK NO. they always BABY me after i vent or they find out I relapsed!!! ITS FUCKING ANNOYING AND IT MAKES ME WANNA KMS EVEN MORE.

Adult friends? NON EXISTANT

Therapist? Don't have one NOR WANT ONE.

IM TELLING YOU IF I EVER GET RAPED OR GROOMED (again sigh) IM NOT TELLING ANY ADULTS. IM GOING TO VENT TO MY FRIENDS BECAUSE THEIR THE INKY PEOPLE WHO SRE SAFE TO SPILLCMY GUTS TO.

I HATE ADUKTS SO MUCH

I fuck8ng hate them

#vent #tw vent

I just relapsed shit is NAWT getting better.

Luckily I cut like high on my shoulder so I can still wear short sleeves because it's hot outside.

And on my thighs aswell, a little nervous for swimming though because this is my first summer with scars, my parents know (IM NOT FUCKING TELLING THEM I RELAPSED. I LITERALLY DONT TRUST ANY ADULT WITH THIS KNOWLEDGE.)

Also last time I relapsed was 2 months ago.

Hhhghhhh fuckkkkkkkk I hate myself so muchhhhhh

#tw self harm mention #Self harm #tw vent #vent #not promoting #Don't do this kids #No

wldhow

rainsterrants

how shit has been going lately for me lwk

#2 months #Gone lol #Also peak art mb for using it as a slight vent

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i just got on the national honors society

ive never wanted to kill myself more then ever right now

#tw vent #vent #tw suicidality #suicidality cw #suicidality #gifted kid #gifted

by the way, these are all thoughts.

I truly don't have the courage to scutwlly do it.

Its really scary to try and do it actually

Considering the process of it.

Please don't call someone on me, I will never gk through.

This is gonna sound fucked up

But I wish someone would groom or rape me or something like that.

Not that I think it's hot, or fun.

Mostly because atleast that'd make me valid.

My mental state I mean,

I have no trauma. I grew up in upper middle class, loving parents, loving family, accepting family.

Fuck

Where did I go wrong dude.

#vent #Rape idealization #Grooming idealization #Rape #Grooming #Not because I think it's cute or trendy I'm very aware it's traumatic and horrific to go through #That's my point though. I want to feel valid

I don't even know what my actual personality is anymore.

Im just a jackass at this point.

tbh I need a gun so I can shoot myself with it

It'd be easier then staying alive.

#vent #tw suicidality #Suicide #Suicidal thoughts

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

God I'm so dry to talk to

"ahah your so gifted"

"Your so kind

SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP

ALL OF THST IS A FUCKING ACT

IM NOT KIND

I ONLY SEEM THAT WAY FOR CONVIENCE. I COULDNT CARE LESS IF YOU DROPPED YOUR THING AND IT BROKE, I COULDJT CARE IF YOU NEEDED A PENCIL OR IF SOM3THING TRWGIC HAPPENED

Im not doing this out of kindness I'm do8ng this out of convenience of being out of conflict.

#Tw vent #Vent

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I NEED to get this out.