“H E R O E S dont exist. And if they did,

I    W O U L D N T    B E    O N E”

“H E R O E S dont exist. And if they did,

I    W O U L D N T    B E    O N E”

“H E R O E S dont exist. And if they did,

I    W O U L D N T    B E    O N E”

“In the scale of destinies, brawn will never weigh so much as brain. I’ve always been more brawn than brain anyhow.”

“In the scale of destinies, brawn will never weigh so much as brain. I’ve always been more brawn than brain anyhow.”

                             “A man needed fire in his veins to burn through the world.”

                                                                   lionveincd

✽  long post ahead bc i have no self control ! ✽  change pronouns / punctuation as needed . ✽  some lyrics are explicit. ✽  some themes are slightly darker. ✽  alteratively, send    ♫ 𝚏𝚘𝚕𝚔𝚕𝚘𝚛𝚎    to have a lyric automatically generated & said to your muse instead .

[ track 01 ]   the 1 ❛ I’m doing good! I’m on some new shit. ❜ ❛ I thought I saw you at the bus stop. ❜ ❛ I hit the ground running each night. ❜ ❛ You know, the greatest films of all time were never made. ❜ ❛ If you wanted me, you really should have showed. ❜ ❛ If you never bleed, you’re never gonna grow. ❜ ❛ It’s alright now. ❜ ❛ We were something, don’t you think so? ❜ ❛ If my wishes came true, it would have been you. ❜ ❛ In my defense — I have none for never leaving well enough alone. ❜ ❛ It would have been fun if you would have been the one. ❜ ❛ I had this dream you’re doing cool shit, having adventures on your own. ❜ ❛ We never painted by the numbers, baby. ❜ ❛ We were making it count. ❜ ❛ You know the greatest loves of all time are over now. ❜ ❛ I guess you never know. ❜ ❛ It’s another day of waking up alone. ❜ ❛ If one thing had been different, would everything be different today? ❜ ❛ It would have been sweet if it could’ve been me. ❜ ❛ In my defense, I have none for digging up the grave another time. ❜

[ track 02 ]   cardigan ❛ When you are young, they assume you know nothing. ❜ ❛ Baby, kiss it better. ❜ ❛ I was your favorite. ❜ ❛ A friend to all is a friend to none. ❜ ❛ Chase two girls, lose the one. ❜ ❛ To kiss in cars and downtown bars was all we needed. ❜ ❛ You drew stars around my scars and now I’m bleeding. ❜ ❛ I knew you tried to change the ending. ❜ ❛ I knew you’d linger like a tattoo kiss. ❜ ❛ I knew you’d haunt all of my what-ifs. ❜ ❛ I knew everything when I was young. ❜ ❛ I knew I’d curse you for the longest time. ❜ ❛ I knew you’d miss me once the thrill expired, and you’d be standing in my front porch light. ❜ ❛ I knew you’d come back to me. ❜

[ track 03 ]   the last great american dynasty ❛ How did a middle-class divorcee do it? ❜ ❛ The wedding was a charming, if a little gauche. ❜ ❛ There’s only so far new money goes. ❜ ❛ Their parties were tasteful, if a little loud. ❜ ❛ It must have been her fault his heart gave out. ❜ ❛ There goes the last great American dynasty. ❜ ❛ Who knows, if she never showed up, what could have been. ❜ ❛ There goes the maddest woman this town has ever seen. ❜ ❛ They say she was seen on occasion, pacing the rocks, staring out the sea. ❜ ❛ In a feud with her neighbor, she stole his dog and dyed it key lime green. ❜ ❛ Fifty years is a long time. ❜ ❛ Who knows, if I never showed up, what could’ve been. ❜ ❛ I had a marvelous time ruining everything. ❜ ❛ I had a marvelous time. ❜

[ track 04 ]   exile ❛ I can see you standing, honey, with his arms around your body. ❜ ❛ I think I’ve seen this film before, and I didn’t like the ending. ❜ ❛ You’re not my homeland anymore. ❜ ❛ What am I defending now? ❜ ❛ You were my town. Now I’m in exile, seeing you out. ❜ ❛ I can see you staring, honey, like he’s just your understudy, like you’d get your knuckles bloody for me. ❜ ❛ You’d get your knuckles bloody for me. ❜ ❛ Those eyes add insult to injury. ❜ ❛ I’m not your problem anymore. ❜ ❛ Who am I offending now? ❜ ❛ You were my crown. Now I’m in exile, seeing you out. ❜ ❛ I’m leaving out the side door. ❜ ❛ There is no amount of crying I can do for you. ❜ ❛ All this time, we always walked a very thin line. ❜ ❛ You didn’t even hear me out. ❜ ❛ You never gave a warning sign. ❜ ❛ I gave so many signs. ❜ ❛ All this time, I never learned to read your mind. ❜ ❛ I couldn’t turn things around. ❜ ❛ You never turned things around. ❜ ❛ You didn’t even see the signs. ❜

[ track 05 ]   my tears ricochet ❛ If I’m on fire, you’ll be made of ashes, too. ❜ ❛ Even on my worst day, did I deserve, babe — all the hell you gave me? ❜ ❛ I loved you, I swear I loved you, until my dying day. ❜ ❛ I didn’t have it in myself to go with grace. ❜ ❛ You’re the hero flying around, saving face. ❜ ❛ If I’m dead to you, why were you at the wake? ❜ ❛ Look at how my tears ricochet. ❜ ❛ We gather stones, never knowing what they’ll mean. ❜ ❛ You know I didn’t want to have to haunt you. ❜ ❛ What a ghostly scene. ❜ ❛ You used to tell me I was brave. ❜ ❛ I can go anywhere I want. Anywhere I want, just not home. ❜ ❛ You can aim for my heart — go for blood. ❜ ❛ You would still miss me in your bones. ❜ ❛ I still talk to you when I’m screaming at the sky. ❜ ❛ You had to kill me, but it killed you just the same. ❜ ❛ You turned into your worst fears. ❜ ❛ You’re tossing out blame, drunk on this pain, crossing out the good years. ❜

[ track 06 ]   mirrorball ❛ I’ll show you every version of yourself tonight. ❜ ❛ When I break, it’s a million pieces. ❜ ❛ Hush. ❜ ❛ You’ll find me on my tallest tip-toes, spinning in my highest heels, love — shining just for you. ❜ ❛ I know they said the end is near. ❜ ❛ I can change everything about me to fit in. ❜ ❛ You’re not like the regulars. ❜ ❛ I’m still on that tightrope. ❜ ❛ I’m still trying everything to get you laughing at me. ❜ ❛ I’m still a believer, but I don’t know why. ❜ ❛ I’ve never been a natural. ❜ ❛ All I do is try, try, try. ❜ ❛ I’m still trying everything to keep you looking at me. ❜

[ track 07 ]   seven ❛ Please picture me in the trees. ❜ ❛ I hit my peak at seven, feet in the swing over the creek. ❜ ❛ I was too scared to jump in, but I was high in the sky. ❜ ❛ Are there still beautiful things? ❜ ❛ Cross your heart. ❜ ❛ Though I can’t recall your face, I still got love for you. ❜ ❛ Love you to the moon and to Saturn. ❜ ❛ The love lasts so long. ❜ ❛ I’ve been meaning to tell you, I think your house is haunted. ❜ ❛ Your dad is always mad. ❜ ❛ I think you should come live with me. ❜ ❛ We can be pirates! ❜ ❛ You won’t have to cry or hide in the closet. ❜ ❛ Our love will be passed on. ❜ ❛ I used to scream ferociously any time I wanted. ❜ ❛ Pack your dolls and a sweater. ❜

[ track 08 ]   august ❛ Salt air and the rust on your door — I never needed anything more. ❜ ❛ I can see us lost in the memory. ❜ ❛ August slipped away into a moment in time, because it was never mine. ❜ ❛ I was see us twisted in bedsheets. ❜ ❛ August sipped away like a bottle of wine, because you were never mine. ❜ ❛ Will you call me when you’re back at school? ❜ ❛ I remember thinking I had you. ❜ ❛ It was never mine. ❜ ❛ You were never mine. ❜ ❛ For me, it was enough to live for the hope of it all. ❜ ❛ I canceled plans just in case you’d call. ❜ ❛ Meet me behind the mall. ❜ ❛ So much for summer love and saying “us”. ❜ ❛ You weren’t mine to lose. ❜ ❛ Do you remember? ❜ ❛ Remember when I pulled up and said “Get in the car.” ❛ I was living for the hope of it all. ❜

[ track 09 ]   this is me trying ❛ I’ve been having a hard time adjusting. ❜ ❛ I didn’t know if you’d care if I came back. ❜ ❛ I have a lot of regrets about that. ❜ ❛ Maybe I don’t quite know what to say. ❜ ❛ I’m here in your doorway. ❜ ❛ I just wanted you to know this is me trying. ❜ ❛ I got wasted like all my potential. ❜ ❛ My words shoot to kill when I’m mad. I have a lot of regrets about that. ❜ ❛ I was so ahead of the curve, the curve became a sphere. ❜ ❛ I ended up here, pouring my heart out to a stranger. ❜ ❛ I didn’t pour the whiskey. ❜ ❛ At least I’m trying. ❜ ❛ It’s hard to be at a party when I feel like an open wound. ❜ ❛ It’s hard to be anywhere these days when all I want is you. ❜ ❛ You’re a flashback in a film reel on the one screen in my town. ❜

[ track 10 ]   illicit affairs ❛ Make sure nobody sees you leave. ❜ ❛ Tell your friends you’re out for a run. ❜ ❛ You’ll be flushed when you return. ❜ ❛ Take the road less traveled by. ❜ ❛ Tell yourself you can always stop. ❜ ❛ What started in beautiful rooms, ends with meeting in parking lots. ❜ ❛ That’s the thing about illicit affairs — and clandestine meetings and longing stares. ❜ ❛ It’s born from just one single glance, but it dies and it dies and it dies a million little times. ❜ ❛ You leave no trace behind. ❜ ❛ Take the words for what they are — a dwindling mercurial high, a drug that only worked the first few hundred times. ❜ ❛ They show their truth one single time, but they lie and they lie and they lie. A million little times. ❜ ❛ Don’t call me “kid”. ❜ ❛ Don’t call me “baby”. ❜ ❛ Look at this godforsaken mess that you made me. ❜ ❛ You showed me colors you know I can’t see with anyone else. ❜ ❛ Look at this idiotic fool that you made me. ❜ ❛ You taught me a secret language I can’t speak with anyone else. ❜ ❛ You know damn well, for you, I would ruin myself a million little times. ❜

[ track 11 ]   invisible string ❛ I used to think I would meet somebody there. ❜ ❛ Teal was the color of your shirt when you were sixteen at the yogurt shop. ❜ ❛ Time, curious time. ❜ ❛ Were there clues I didn’t see? ❜ ❛ Isn’t it just so pretty to think all along there was some invisible string tying you to me? ❜ ❛ You ate at my favorite spot for dinner. ❜ ❛ She said I looked like an American singer. ❜ ❛ Time, mystical time — cutting me open, then healing me fine. ❜ ❛ Something wrapped all of my past mistakes in barbed wire. ❜ ❛ One single thread of gold tied me to you. ❜ ❛ Gold was the color of the leaves when you around Centennial Park. ❜ ❛ Hell was the journey, but it brought me to heaven. ❜ ❛ Time, wondrous time, gave me the blues and then purple-pink skies. ❜ ❛ It’s cool, baby, with me. ❜

[ track 12 ]   mad woman ❛ What did you think I’d say to that? ❜ ❛ Does a scorpion sting when fighting back? ❜ ❛ They strike to kill, and you know I will. ❜ ❛ What do you sing on your drive home? ❜ ❛ Do you see my face in the neighbors lawn? ❜ ❛ Fuck you forever. ❜ ❛ Every time you call me crazy, I get more crazy. ❜ ❛ When you say I seem angry, I get more angry. ❜ ❛ There’s nothing like a mad woman. ❜ ❛ What a shame she went mad. ❜ ❛ No one likes a mad woman. You made her like that. ❜ ❛ You’ll poke that bear ‘till her claws come out and you find something to wrap your noose around. ❜ ❛ I breathe flames each time I talk. ❜ ❛ They say “Move On,” but you know I won’t. ❜ ❛ Women like hunting witches too, doing your dirtiest work for you. ❜ ❛ It’s obvious that wanting me dead has really brought you two together. ❜ ❛ I’m taking my time. ❜ ❛ You took everything from me. ❜ ❛ She should be mad, should be scathing like me. ❜

[ track 13 ]   epiphany ❛ I think he’s bleeding out. ❜ ❛ Some things you just can’t speak about. ❜ ❛ With you, I serve. With you, I fall down. ❜ ❛ I think she’s crashing out. ❜ ❛ Only twenty minutes to sleep. ❛ You dream of some epiphany — just one single glimpse of relief. ❜

[ track 14 ]   betty ❛ I won’t make assumptions. ❜ ❛ I think it’s because of me. ❜ ❛ One time, I was riding on my skateboard when I passed your house. ❜ ❛ It’s like I couldn’t breathe. ❜ ❛ You heard the rumors. ❜ ❛ You can’t believe a word she says most times. But this time, it was true. ❜ ❛ The worst thing that I ever did was what I did to you. ❜ ❛ If I just showed up at your party, would you have me? ❜ ❛ Would you want me? ❜ ❛ Would you tell me to go fuck myself? ❜ ❛ In the garden, would you trust me if I told you it was a just a summer thing? ❜ ❛ I’m only seventeen. I don’t know anything. ❜ ❛ I don’t know anything, but I know I miss you. ❜ ❛ I know where it all went wrong. ❜ ❛ I was nowhere to be found. ❜ ❛ I hate crowds. You know that. ❜ ❛ I saw you dance with him. ❜ ❛ I was walking home on broken cobblestones, just thinking of you. ❛ She pulled up like a figment of my worst intentions. ❜ ❛ Get in. Let’s drive. ❜ ❛ I dreamt of you all summer long. ❜ ❛ I planned it out for weeks now. ❜ ❛ It’s finally sinking in. ❜ ❛ Right now is the last time. ❜ ❛ I can dream about what happens when you can see my face again. ❜ ❛ The only thing I wanna do is make it up to you. ❜ ❛ Will you have me? ❜ ❛ Will you love me? ❜ ❛ Will you kiss me on the porch in front of all your stupid friends? ❜ ❛ If you kiss me, will it be just like I dreamed it? ❜ ❛ I don’t know anything. ❜

[ track 15 ]   peace ❛ Our coming-of-age has come and gone. ❜ ❛ I never had the courage of my convictions, as long as danger is near. ❜ ❛ It’s just around the corner, darlin. ❜ ❛ I could never give you peace. ❜ ❛ I’m a fire and I’ll keep your brittle heart warm. ❜ ❛ All these people think love’s for show, but I would die for you in secret. ❜ ❛ The devil’s in the details, but you got a friend in me. ❜ ❛ Would it be enough if I could never give you peace? ❜ ❛ Your integrity makes me seem small. ❜ ❛ I talk shit with my friends. It’s like I’m wasting your honor. ❜ ❛ Is it enough? ❜ ❛ I’d give you my sunshine, give you my best. ❜ ❛ The rain is always gonna come if you’re standing with me. ❜

this is me trying

“ i’ve been having a hard time adjusting ”

“ i didn't know if you’d care if i came back ”

“ i have a lot of regrets about that ”

“ maybe i don’t quite know what to say ”

“ i’m here in your doorway ”

“ i just wanted you to know that this is me trying ”

“ so i got wasted like all my potential ”

“ my words shoot to kill when i’m mad ”

“ i have a lot of regrets about that ”

“ i was so ahead of the curve ”

“ fell behind all my classmates and i ended up here ”

“ and it’s hard to be at a party when i feel like an open wound ”

“ it’s hard to be anywhere these days when all i want is you ”

​illicit affairs

“ make sure nobody sees you leave ”

“ tell your friends you're out for a run ”

“ take the road less traveled by ”

“ tell yourself you can always stop ”

“ leave the perfume on the shelf ”

“ like you don’t even exist ”

“ take the words for what they are ”

“ and that’s the thing about illicit affairs ”

“ but they lie and they lie and they lie ”

“ don’t call me “kid" 

“ don’t call me “baby” ”

“ look at this godforsaken mess that you made me ”

“ you showed me colors you know i can’t see with anyone else ”

“ look at this idiotic fool that you made me ”

“ you taught me a secret language i can’t speak with anyone else ”

“ and you know damn well for you, i would ruin myself a million little times ”

​invisible string

“ i used to think i would meet somebody there ”

“ were there clues i didn’t see? ”

“and isn’t it just so pretty to think all along there was some invisible string tying you to me? ”

“ she said i looked like an american singer ”

​mad woman

“ what did you think i’d say to that? ”

“ they strike to kill, and you know i will ”

“ fuck you forever ”

“ every time you call me crazy, i get more crazy ”

“ and when you say i seem angry, i get more angry ”

“ no one likes a mad woman ”

“ you made her like that ”

“ they say, “move on” but you know i won’t ”

“ it’s obvious that wanting me dead has really brought you two together ”

“ i’m taking my time ”

“ ‘cause you took everything from me ”

​epiphany

“ keep your helmet, keep your life ”

“ just a flesh wound, here’s your rifle ”

“ sir, i think he’s bleeding out ”

“ some things you just can’t speak about ”

“ only twenty minutes to sleep ”

“ but you dream of some epiphany ”

​betty

“ i won’t make assumptions about why you switched your homeroom but i think it’s ‘cause of me ”

“ one time i was riding on my skateboard when i passed your house it’s like i couldn’t breathe ”

“ you heard the rumors from [ name ] ”

“ you can’t believe a word she says ”

“ the worst thing that i ever did was what i did to you ”

“ but if i just showed up at your party would you have me? ”

“ would you want me? ”

“ would you tell me to go fuck myself? ”

“ i don’t know anything but i know i miss you ”

“ i hate the crowds, you know that ”

“ plus, i saw you dance with him ”

“ slept next to her but i dreamt of you all summer long ”

“ i’m here on your doorstep ”

“ the only thing i wanna do is make it up to you ”

“ will you love me? ”

“ will you kiss me on the porch in front of all your stupid friends? ”

“ you know i miss you ”

​peace

“ i never had the courage of my convictions ”

“ no, i could never give you peace ”

“ but i’m a fire and i'll keep your brittle heart warm ”

“ but i would die for you in secret ”

“ the devil’s in the details but you got a friend in me ”

“ i talk shit with my friends ”

“ your integrity makes me seem small ”

“ i’d give you my sunshine, give you my best ”

“ but the rain is always gonna come if you’re standin’ with me ”

“ all these people think love’s for show ”

“ would it be enough if i could never give you peace? ”

​hoax

“ this has broken me down ”

“ your faithless love’s the only hoax i believe in ”

“ don't want no other shade of blue but you ”

“ i am ash from your fire ”

“ you know i left a part of me back in new york ”

“ you knew the hero died so what’s the movie for? ”

“ but what you did was just as dark ”

“ you have beaten my heart ”

“ you knew it still hurts underneath my scars from when they pulled me apart ”

the 1

“ i’m doing good, i’m on some new shit ”

“ and if you wanted me, you really should’ve showed ”

“ but we were something, don’t you think so? ”

“ and if my wishes came true it would’ve been you ”

“ i had this dream you’re doing cool shit ”

“ and it’s another day waking up alone ”

“ if one thing had been different, would everything be different today? ”

“ we were something, don’t you think so? ”

cardigan

“ when you are young, they assume you know nothing ”

“ but i knew you ”

“ baby, kiss it better ”

“ a friend to all is a friend to none ”

“ but i knew you’d linger like a tattoo kiss ”

“ i knew i’d curse you for the longest time ”

“ i knew you’d miss me once the thrill expired ”

“ and i knew you’d come back to me ”

“ and when i felt like i was an old cardigan under someone’s bed you put me on and said i was your favorite ”

​the last great american dynasty

“ the wedding was charming, if a little gauche ”

“ there’s only so far new money goes ”

“ their parties were tasteful, if a little loud ”

“ who knows, if she never showed up, what could’ve been ”

“ there goes the maddest woman this town has ever seen ”

“ she had a marvelous time ruining everything ”

“ blew through the money on the boys and the ballet ”

“ she stole his dog and dyed it key lime green ”

“ i had a marvelous time ruining everything ”

exile

“ i can see you standing, honey ” 

“ i think i’ve seen this film before and i didn’t like the ending ”

“ so what am i defending now? ”

“ i’m not your problem anymore ”

“ i’m leaving out the side door ”

“ i can see you starin’, honey ”

“ like you’d get your knuckles bloody for me ”

“ you were my crown, now i’m in exile, seein’ you out ”

“ so step right out, there is no amount of crying i can do for you ”

“ we always walked a very thin line ”

“ you didn’t even hear me out ”

“ you never gave a warning sign ”

“ i gave so many signs ”

“ i never learned to read your mind ”

“ i couldn’t turn things around ”

“ you never turned things around ” 

“ you didn’t even see the signs ”

​my tears ricochet

“ and if i’m on fire you'll be made of ashes too ”

“ even on my worst day, did i deserve, babe, all the hell you gave me? ”

“ ‘cause i loved you, i swear i loved you ‘til my dying day ”

“ i didn’t have it in myself to go with grace ”

“ and you’re the hero flying around, saving face ”

“ and if i’m dead to you, why are you at the wake? ”

“ wishing i stayed ”

“ you know i didn’t want to have to haunt you ”

“ you wear the same jewels that i gave you ”

“ and i can go anywhere i want, just not home ”

​mirrorball

“ i’ll show you every version of yourself tonight ”

“ and when i break, it's in a million pieces ”

“ hush, i know they said the end is near ”

“ i can change everything about me to fit in ”

“ i’m still trying everything to get you laughing at me ”

“ i’m still a believer, but i don’t know why ”

“ i’ve never been a natural, all i do is try ”

“ i’m still trying everything to keep you looking at me ”

​seven

“ i hit my peak at seven ”

“ are there still beautiful things? ”

“ i still got love for you ”

“ love you to the moon and to saturn ”

“ i think your house is haunted ”

“ your dad is always mad ”

“ i think you should come live with me ”

​august

“ are you sure? ” 

“ i can see us twisted in bedsheets ”

“ ‘cause you were never mine ”

“ will you call when you’re back at school? ”

“ i remember thinkin’ i had you ”

“ canceled plans just in case you’d call ”

“ meet me behind the mall ”

“ so much for summer love and saying “us” ”

                          The stars twinkled in his eyes and the sun itself warmed his smile.

some   may   be   nsfw   and   /   or   be   triggering.   

01    :     TOUCH .

❝ i love this [ FABRIC ], it feels satisfying. ❞

❝ your touch. it leaves me breathless. ❞

❝ your touch is unlike any other. ❞

​❝ have you ever felt anything more comfortable? ❞

❝ feel this. what does it feel like to you? ❞

❝ i wanted to see what it felt like. ❞

​❝ touch it. i dare you. ❞

​❝ you felt ice cold when i touched you. ❞

​❝ you feel warm to me. ❞

​❝ i love the feel of [ FABRIC ] against my skin. ❞

​❝ i love the feel of your skin against mine. ❞

​❝ i would never touch anyone else. ❞

​❝ i love the feel of your hair between each of my fingers. ❞

​❝ don’t you dare touch me. ❞

​❝ i want to feel your lips against my own. ❞

​❝ i can feel your pulse. it jumped. ❞

​❝ let me give you a massage. ❞

❝ you feel like home to me. ❞ 

02     :      TASTE .

❝ i love the taste of you. ❞

❝ i can never forget that taste. ❞

❝ fair warning, it does have a bitter taste. ❞

​❝ no offense, you just aren’t my taste. ❞

❝ can i have a taste of that? ❞

❝ i have yearned for the taste of your lips. ❞

​❝ that tasted pretty good actually. ❞

​❝ it just left a really bad taste in my mouth so no thanks. ❞

​❝ nothing taste better than chocolate. ❞

​❝ i’ve got something you might want to taste. ❞

​❝ i will forever savor that taste. ❞

​❝ blood has such a metallic taste. ❞

​❝ my taste buds are mad at me after eating that. ❞

​❝ how’s it feel to get a taste of your own medicine? ❞

​❝ you didn’t even taste it. ❞

​❝ trust me, you’ll want to taste this. ❞

​❝ i think it has a bit of bitter sweet taste. ❞

❝ so you tasted it, did you like it? ❞

03     :      SIGHT .

❝ i see you. ❞

❝ i’ve never seen things so clearer than i do now. ❞

❝ it’s too dark, i can’t see anything. ❞

​❝ how can you see anything? it’s pitch dark. ❞

❝ i’ve looked close enough and i see you for what you are. ❞

❝ please, just look at me. ❞

​❝ stop staring at me like that. ❞

​❝ get that light out of my face. ❞

​❝ it’s so bright outside today. ❞

​❝ what’s wrong? what did you see? ❞

​❝ you’re scared, you must have saw something. ❞

​❝ what i saw, you’ll never believe me. ❞

​❝ i’ve never seen you before. ❞

​❝ have we seen one another before? ❞

​❝ you see me for what i truly am. ❞

​❝ i didn’t see anything. ❞

​❝ did you see that? ❞

❝ i can’t believe my eyes. ❞

04     :      SOUND .

❝ shhh, i just heard something. ❞

❝ did you hear that? ❞

❝ what is that sound? ❞

​❝ i missed the sound of your voice. ❞

❝ do you hear me? stay away from me. ❞

❝ i hear you, loud and clear. ❞

​❝ i’m sorry, what was that? i didn’t hear you. ❞

​❝ i’ve heard that sound before. ❞

​❝ you didn’t hear anything at all? ❞

​❝ can you hear what they’re saying? ❞

​❝ aw, i love the sound of music. ❞

​❝ i never said i could hear them. ❞

​❝ wait, hear that? something is coming. ❞

​❝ i could hear screams … ❞

​❝ i heard you all the way upstairs. ❞

​❝ you didn’t just hear that? that sound? that noise? ❞

​❝ trust me, you’re going to want to hear this. ❞

❝ please, just hear me out. ❞

05     :      SMELL .

❝ what is that smell? ❞

❝ i have missed your smell. ❞

❝ you smell nice. ❞

​❝ it’s unlike anything i’ve smelled before. ❞

❝ i smell the food cooking from here. ❞

❝ do you smell that? ❞

​❝ how are you able to smell that? ❞

​❝ no offense but it really smells. ❞

​❝ it’s starting to smell. ❞

​❝ tell me, you’ve smelled this before. ❞

​❝ i know that smell, it’s the smell of lies. ❞

​❝ i can smell you from here. ❞

​❝ are you smelling me? ❞

​❝ i missed the smell of your hair. ❞

​❝ i need to step away, get some fresh air. ❞

​❝ do you smell that? that’s the smell of freedom. ❞

​❝ i could never erase your smell. ❞

from the first 70 pages of “whiskey words & a shovel” by r.h. Sin

 “ you’re so used to being mistreated. ” 

“ you’ve gotten so used to being hurt that happiness scares you. ” 

“ who robbed you of innocence? ” 

“ who was your first? ” 

“ and the saddest part of all? you’ll cling to the good memories, as if there were any. ” 

“ the pain will always be there. ” 

“ so many people are setting the bar really low. ” 

“ you get what you allow. ”

“ i was never what you wanted. ” 

“ i was just the one you settled for. ” 

“ you’re an experience. ” 

“ meet me here. ” 

“ you were never the one. ” 

“ this was never love. ” 

“ you were simply necessary. ” 

“ i had to be hurt by you. ” 

“ i hope you find what you’re looking for. ” 

“ i hope you find the truth. ” 

“ and that’s how they control you. ” 

“ our version of living feels more like death. ” 

“ i understand you. ” 

“ i was forced to survive in your absence. ” 

“ i was faced with the realization that I never needed you. ” 

“ you’re always apologizing. ” 

“ one day I’ll stop listening. ” 

“ we grew apart.” 

“ we stopped trying. ” 

“ i’m trying to get better. ” 

“ i’m trying to get better at walking away from unhealthy situations. ” 

“ i struggle with the idea of anyone loving me unconditionally. ” 

“ sometimes I wish you waited for me. ” 

“ i got tired of going through the same shit with different people. ” 

“ it’s not your fucking fault. ” 

“ you can’t change a man. ” 

“ the thought of being in love is blinding. ” 

“ bargaining using sex.  either way you get screwed. ” 

“ the memories hurt the most. ” 

“ sometimes i get tired of thinking about the things that i don’t want to think about. ” 

“ sometimes i get so fucking tired. ”