BAM

Today he’s frustrated with installing a new desktop and he’s been using language I’ve never heard out of him, and for whatever reason, it’s doing things to me.

I’d like to volunteer as tribute for him to relive his...*ahem* tension. But that violates workplace decorum 😅.

I had to go to a birthday party today for a friend’s daughter.

K was there. In all his dorky intelligent Grecian god glory.

With the arms and the face and the ass....

I kind of tried to avoid him because I’m just intimidated by him now but he sneaked his way over to the table I sat at, out of like seven tables and so many chairs. And I just couldn’t avoid him any longer because I think he was staring dead at me for a while and I waved and said hi, and he did the same, eyes wide. Awkward. Yikes.

And my friend was like “oh...how do you know him?!?!”

Like oh, he’s the man I pined for for three years and am still currently pining for, thanks for asking. 😩

Why is this my life.

It’s true what they say - absence makes the heart grow fonder. 😒

But anyway, I was going trough my instagram and came across posts he’d liked. Normally he would mostly interact with class-related posts but there was this one:

That he liked. At this time I was going through a rough patch with some peers because of some decisions I had to make, and it just felt like it was a tiny nudge from him like “Keep going, L! Chin up!” Does it mean he thinks I shine? That I’m authentic? That I’m kind? I don’t know. I wish I did.

I miss him so much. I miss his office. The earthy smell it had from all the samples. The tiny plants way up in his window. The bursts of air that would scare me every time - he’d laugh when I’d jump or curse. I miss his excited rambling and sighs of frustration. His teasing.

Me: Artichoke??? On pizza?! Blasphemy.

K: Blasphemy?! No, it’s good. *orders a slice of artichoke pizza*

Me: That’s disgusting. You’re disgusting. That doesn’t belong on a pizza.

K: Yes it does!

Me: No. It doesn’t!

K: Yeah huh!

Me: Nope.

There was this on-going joke between K and me about the spelling of my name. Sometimes he’d misspell it twice (two different ways) in the same email. Always my first name. I’d gripe at him, reply to his emails with the correct spelling, show up at his office - correction in bold and underlined in tow, etc. Only to be met with a snicker, sly smile, and excuse.

Well a few days ago, we noticed that everyone’s name was correct except my last one. It’s super simple to spell. A kindergartener could spell it no issue.

“Why?” I ask

“You do know HE is the one that typed that up, right?”

He looks younger.

Doubt he saw me, or if he did didn’t act as such.

Today was my last work shift with K. I’ll see him tomorrow at graduation and then after that...around? I guess? I hope.

Anyway.

Holy Jesus.

He was talking about this sample and was being clever and like bit his lip???? In this much-too-sexy way?! And WINKED?!?! AT ME. And there was this god damned damning twinkle in his eye. I have never seen this from him before?!?!?!?!

I lost all ability to function and just stared and basically instantly CLIMAXED

What is this torture?! THAT is the last image I’m gonna have of him (until I see him again maybe, but honestly I’ll be happy with this image)?!

Jesus-tap-danced-and-jumped-off-a-cliff-and-turned-into-a-pterodactyl-CHRIST

It was THE sexiest thing I have ever witnessed.