Warrior With A Pen

Acts 4: 32

32 All the believers were agreed in heart and mind. They didn’t claim that anything they had was their own. Instead, they shared everything they owned.

The world tells us to own lots of stuff and you'll be happy.  The world tells us have lots of money and all your dreams will come true. The world tells us to do what you have to do to stay on top, but is any of that really true? Think about it does a pile of cash keep you warm at night? Can a fancy car wipe your tears in one of those soul-crushing moments of life?  What worth does "stuff" really have and do we really "need" everything we are told we need.

The above scripture is challenging. It is contrary to what we are taught to believe by society.  We are supposed to chase our dreams, hoard stuff, and gloat on social media...right? That's the dream isn't it, but the verse says otherwise. It says believers claim no ownership over stuff. Why?  I think there a few reasons we shouldn't rely on stuff for happiness.

Reason 1: You can't take any of that stuff with you. When you die all that stuff you felt the need for stays here. Your soul moves on and God doesn't give you any suitcases to pack up your stuff. In the end, all that stuff means nothing.  Chances are if you were given wealth and stuff then there is a chance you were meant to share it.

Reason 2:  We are called on to take care of those who are less fortunate. God makes it pretty clear we are supposed to love and care for each other. It isn't very caring to hoard wealth while so many go hungry and sleep on the street. Is it really necessary to buy the latest cell phone or could you make do with what you have and you use that money instead to put clothes on someone's back?

Reason 3: Money and Stuff can easily become an idol. When money or stuff becomes a number one priority. When you need the latest and the best to be on top and feel happy. When money and stuff is a major cause for your well being than it just might be a problem. If Money has become priority number one chances are you put God on the back burner at some point. When money is our idol and God is in a box somewhere our ability to love, show compassion, and empathize becomes handicapped. When our ability to love is handicapped we become unable to live into God's purpose for us. We become unable to reap the blessings he wishes to give us.

In the end, we need to put our faith in God and trust he will care for us and provide for us.  Sure money and stuff can make life easier, but if you aren't careful it can cripple your heart. We must be able to find the balance of stuff and God's purpose in each of our own lives.

Prayer:

Dear Lord, help me to always put you first. Help me to recognize the idols in my life and help me to have a heart that is willing to share with those you put in my path. Help me so that material goods and wealth don't cripple my soul. Give me the strength to rely on you and the faith to trust you with everything.  Amen.

Song of Mediation:

Psalm 32: 3-4

3 When I kept silent about my sin,   my body became weak   because I groaned all day long. 4 Day and night   you punished me. I became weaker and weaker   as I do in the heat of summer.

Sin is one of those many things that we have a natural tendency to try and deny we are guilty of. We like to put on a front of innocence to hide our wrongdoings. I am reminded of a small incident that took place when I was still a young kid.

As a child every year after Christmas we would make the 3 to 4-hour drive to a small town just outside of Pittsburgh called Baden. Most of my mom and dad’s family lived in that area and my parents grew up in that area. So every year we would make the drive for a huge New Year’s Eve Party. Everyone was welcome and my grandparent's house was always jammed packed full of people, but our family from the area would visit with each other for a week or so before the big party.

It was one of these pre-party nights that I and a few of my cousins were playing in the living room while the adults were off doing adult things. Things were getting really loud in our play and it was starting to freak me out a bit. As a natural born introvert when things get noisy it is my natural tendency to try and escape that noise. So my mind flashed to the school lunchroom and how when the principal or lunch lady wanted us to be quiet they would simply flash the lights on and off.

So I made my way to the lamp that was on and switched it off. Instead of the quiet, I was dreaming of chaos broke loose. My cousins began to scream loudly in fright. In a panic I turned the light on and before anyone could see me clearly I distanced myself from said lamp. Next thing I knew my cousins were determined to find the culprit that turned off the light.

Myself being just a kid didn’t make such a clean break after all and one of them pointed their finger at me and yelled that I did it. That they saw me turn off the light. Seeing how upset they all were I knew I was not going to come clean so I lied. I firmly denied I ever touched the lamp. An argument ensued and the next thing I knew a pretend trial was taking place. My cousins verses me. They even had eyewitness testimony and I panicked.

My stomach was in knots. I felt really small and very hot as I felt all this pressure on me to admit the truth. I couldn’t take that pressure and ran up the stairs crying my eyes out. Eventually, things settled down and I admitted I just wanted it to be quiet. I felt so much better after I admitted what I did. So much so my tears dried up and I went on playing with my cousins like nothing ever happened.

In this, I learned how awful it feels to hide something when you know it was wrong. Turning off the light isn’t wrong, but it scared my wonderful cousins. The right thing would have been the truth and it would have been done. They probably would have had a good laugh over it, but instead, I lied. This dragged on the whole uncomfortable scenario and caused the whole thing to spiral a bit. When people are lied to most suddenly feel this itch to uncover the truth.

What’s more not telling them made me feel awful. It felt like the world had turned against me. For a brief moment, I forgot how much I cared for them and how much they cared for me. I felt seriously ill and it isn’t really easy to feel happy when you are hiding something. In fact, I even threw around some ridiculous explanations. I think I claimed a burglar turned off the light. What burglar tries to break into a home filled with at least 20 people only to turn off a light for 30 seconds. In my panic, it sounded logical even though it was really lame.

A small incident like this is harmless, but just imagine something more serious. How the wrong would just eat at you. How badly the situation could spiral because the truth of it is being hidden. When we hide our sin it corrodes us until there is nothing left but the sin. Hiding it will consume you until nothing is left. In admitting our sin it loses its power to hold us. Then and only then can we move on and become stronger from it.

Prayer:

Lord, help me to admit wrongdoing when I have sinned. Confessing when I have done wrong is scary and hard. Give me the courage to come clean so I can be forgiven. So I can have peace of mind. So I can experience the joy you wish to give me. So I can become stronger and learn from that wrong. In your name. Amen

Song of Meditation:

2 Timothy 2: 23-24

23 Don’t have anything to do with arguing. It is dumb and foolish. You know it only leads to fights. 24 Anyone who serves the Lord must not be hard to get along with. Instead, they must be kind to everyone. They must be able to teach. The one who serves must not hold anything against anyone.

With the creation of social media and the internet, it isn’t too hard to find yourself in some dumb argument. In today’s political climate it seems everyone is chomping at the bit to argue with someone and prove their point. The problem is arguing doesn’t serve any good. As our scripture, today says it is dumb and foolish. It leads to not just fights, but hurt feelings. It can lead to the destruction of a marriage, the loss of a good friend, or it can make you so blind you don’t see how cruel you’ve become. 

I’ll admit it isn’t easy to avoid all these dumb arguments. Why just today I got sucked into one about a parenting article. What sucks me in is when I get emotionally upset over what the fight is about or if I come to the table emotionally riled up from something else. In my case, I had a stressful morning with the kids and this internet argument was an unintentional way to blow off steam. While I admit now that my initial comment was a bit judgy I am at least thankful I didn’t say anything cruel or intentionally insulting. So how are we supposed to achieve avoiding dumb arguments, be kind to everyone, and not holding anything against anyone? In a world where it’s us versus them mentality isn’t this impossible?

It may be impossible but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try. The Bible asks the impossible of us. It demands it, but the cool thing is that when you fall short God will pick up the slack and help you back on track. I have found a few helpful things to keep in mind that can help you avoid those arguments and take a step in the right direction. 

1. Remember God Loves Diversity

God loves diversity. He purposely created people that would think, look, and feel differently than you. It was meant to be a gift, but many of us treat it like a curse. Diversity if used properly can be channeled to help you grow into a stronger, kinder, and more accepting person. Everyone on this earth was created by God and many are lost. It’s best to remember that diversity is a gift. You don’t have to agree with everyone and you aren’t supposed to. You are, however, supposed to love them anyway. 

2. Remember to Take a Breath

Many of these foolish arguments are born out of both sides coming off of an emotional high. We are so emotionally attached to our view that we stop seeing reason, stop assessing new information, and shut out anything to the contrary. How can you grow if you aren’t willing to listen to a different viewpoint and really consider what is said? Sometimes when we feel ourselves getting emotional about something it can be best to take a breath and calm down. If it is a topic that is so emotional for you that you simply can’t look at other opinions objectively than it may be best to just walk away. As your mother probably told you, “If you can’t say anything nice then don’t say anything at all. “ 

3. Remember Everyone is a Loser

When it comes to these dumb arguments it is best to remember there is no winning. Both sides have already made up their mind and nothing you say will change their mind. Logic goes out the window. Facts become meaningless and it is only a matter of time before insults start flying. The moment you engage with the intention to prove yourself is the moment you already lost. 

4. Chances are You Are Wrong

This last one can be hard a one to swallow, but if you hope to channel diversity and grow then you need to approach these tricky conversations with the thought in mind that you are probably wrong in some aspect. The thing is none of us are completely right. For example when a couple goes to a psychologist for counseling and they both state their side of things the psychologist already knows that both of them are wrong. They know both have fault and responsibility with where they are at in the relationship. The psychologist knows the answer is somewhere in the middle and the key to saving that marriage is to get them to meet in the middle. You see to grow you have to be willing to admit when you are wrong, be willing to apologize and meet in the middle. If you remain rigid you will become brittle and shatter. 

5. Last but Not Least Ask God to Talk For You

In situations where you come along and see a senseless argument well on its ways and you can see real hurt being thrown on both sides, it is understandable to want to jump in calm things down. The thing is it can be hard to do right without getting sucked in yourself. So first before you jump in to diffuse the situation take a moment to pray and ask God to give you the right words to tell them. You’d be surprised what might come pouring out of you. Most often I find I wasn’t thinking that but it somehow came out anyway. Be prepared for backlash because, when God uses you to speak some truth sometimes someone, is upset by it and again be prepared to be wrong. Sometimes we try but get the message messed up.  

Prayer: 

Lord help me to avoid foolish arguments. Give me an open mind and heart so I can be kind and loving to your children. Help me see the beauty in diversity. Help erase the divisions in my mind and instead see everyone as a person. Help me to be a light for you. Guard my tongue, my anger, and steps. Amen. 

Song of Meditation: 

Proverbs 25: 21-22

21 If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat.    If he is thirsty, give him water to drink. 22 By doing these things, you will pile up burning coals on his head.    And the Lord will reward you.

We all have encountered someone in our life that we didn’t like too much and that same someone didn’t like us either. The thought of being nice to them sounds like pure torture. It’s the last thing we want to do. We would rather ignore them, avoid them, or get sucked into some sort of fight where both of you end up looking like callous and cruel people. There really isn’t any winning with relationships like these. Both parties end up hurt in some way. So when we read this verse and it says to treat your enemies with kindness it can seem like a joke, but I have seen the power of this passage first hand. 

When I was just a girl in Elementary school I would ride the bus to and from school.  One particular year a younger girl a block over who had the same bus stop as me really became attached to me. It was fine at first, but soon she began to imitate me. To the point of buying the same clothes I had and buying the same book bag as me. It was my only taste of what a younger sister might be like. She acted like a mini-me and it drove me crazy, but I never said anything and let her imitate. The thing was her sitting next to me became a great source of anger when a girl who sat behind us decided she didn’t like my mini-me very much and my mini-me didn’t like this girl either. So the entire bus rides to and from school each day I sat there and listened to them argue endlessly. It was getting on my last nerve. 

One day on the bus as my mini-me plopped beside me and she began to complain loudly about awful this girl was to me. I couldn’t take it anymore. Now I was being used as a ploy to indirectly insult this girl. It was at that moment that my Sunday school class popped into my mind. That Sunday we had discussed the above verse.  So I sad very loudly so both girls could hear me: “You know the bible says treating someone you don’t like nicely is like dumping hot coals on their head. God says it’s pure torture.” 

Suddenly there was silence as both girls contemplated what I said. Next thing I knew my mini-me and her enemy were forcing fake smiles, looking at each other, and saying nice things to each other through gritted teeth. It looked like a scene out of a sitcom. Over the next few days at some point, they stopped pretending to be nice because they didn’t have to pretend. They found out in their pretending that they actually had a lot in common. They even discovered they liked talking to each other. Soon my mini-me stopped clinging to me and instead attached herself to her new best friend. The girl she thought she hated. The two girls became very close and my mini-me no longer needed to imitate me. Instead, she felt more confidence in being herself as she fostered a precious friendship she almost missed out on.

Being nice to that enemy in your life may seem laughable, but that person you hate could be an amazing person. In fact, you give them a chance you might discover you like them. They could be a best friend. Imagine the possible friendships you have missed out on by refusing to give those you didn’t like a chance. Imagine the blessings you could bring me by taking a step back and deciding to be nice. Just imagine...

Prayer: 

Lord, help me to stay strong and calm. Help me to see those people I don’t like in a new light. Help me not only to treat them with kindness but to see them as you do. Help me love them. Help me see the good in them I am blinded to. Amen. 

Song of Meditation

Hebrews 10: 24-25

24 Let us consider how we can stir up one another to love. Let us help one another to do good works. 25 And let us not give up meeting together. Some are in the habit of doing this. Instead, let us encourage one another with words of hope. Let us do this even more as you see Christ’s return approaching.

It can be easy to overlook the importance of meeting together with fellow followers of Christ. Some may even avoid doing this because of some past hurt, but meeting together and challenging each other's faith is necessary if you expect to truly grow. At the same time, there are some easy mistakes you can make when looking for a good community to join. 

One such mistake is assuming going to church on Sunday Morning is enough. Yes, going to church is a good thing. It’s a good time to fellowship with others, to praise God, and if you have a good preacher you may find yourself challenged as well, but this is not enough. Think of Jesus and his disciples. He fellowshipped with all of them but was closer to a few.  Jesus had his inner circle to share his burdens, to grow, and to be held accountable. If you haven’t a small group of people to grow with within your community your faith will grow brittle. You need an inner circle to keep you strong. This may mean meeting with a few friends for prayer and going through a bible study together. It could also mean showing up for Sunday School on a Sunday morning. 

The second mistake that I have seen happen quite often is people building an inner circle of yes men. They choose people who they know will always agree with them. This can be a dangerous path to take. When our inner circle doesn’t challenge us then we won’t find a need to reflect and grow. If they always agree then there is no one to hold you accountable because if you start to drift chances are they are drifting with you. Groups like these become close-minded, have small hearts, and often become cliquey. Your circle should challenge you, accept your differences, help you with your shortcomings, and help you face hard truths you may not want to address. It’s healthy to talk with someone that interprets things differently than you. It may help you see God in a light you hadn’t considered before and that can bring great growth. 

The third mistake is the empty seat. These are people who want an inner circle. They want a group to study with, pray with, and grow, but never get around to showing up. Instead, they get caught up in the busyness of life and never make time for an inner circle. They put God on the back burner and let that relationship remain stagnant. Until they decide that this needs to be priority chances are their seat will remain empty. 

All these pitfalls can be avoided. Let God be your navigator to your inner circle. He won’t let you down. He will be there with you and help you find the right inner circle. You may have to try a few things before you find your circle, but when you find the right one the benefits will be more than you could imagine. You will find love, support, acceptance, grace, mercy, and spiritual growth. You may even find yourself humbled from time to time. It’s worth taking the time and worth stepping out of your comfort zone. 

Prayer:

Lord God help me find my inner circle. Help me have the desire to find one. Help me to take the action I need to take to find my inner circle. Help me to have an open mind and open heart. Don’t let me be an empty seat and help me avoid the yes men. Help me find an inner circle that will challenge me, support me, and grows with me. Amen. 

Song of Meditation:

Psalm 38: 3-4

3 Because of your anger, my whole body is sick.    Because of my sin, I’m not healthy. 4 My guilt has become too much for me.    It is a load too heavy to carry.

As a mother of three wonderful children of which I love I will admit sometimes  I am pushed beyond my limits and I lose my temper. I do my best to try and calm myself but alas I am only human. As were my parents who also lost their temper a time or two and I would venture a guess that if you are a living and breathing human you too have experienced anger. 

The thing is anger in itself isn’t always a bad thing. Jesus was angry when he flipped over the tables in the temple. Anger can be a tool you can use to make much-needed change or correction, but anger is more often left to fester. It bubbles beneath the surface and festers and grows as you stew about whatever made you angry. It grows and grows and if you aren’t careful it can take over who you are. So much so that it can impact your physical health. (If you want more info on how emotions affect us I highly recommend the book Deadly Emotions.) 

Isn’t it interesting how anger and guilt often go hand and hand? See when we don’t use our anger wisely then we often do or say something rash and end up feeling terrible about it. When anger is left unchecked it can destroy our health, shred our soul, break people we care for and bring us guilt that we may never recover from. Not to mention that it can steal our joy. So what are we to do with our anger?

First, it is important to acknowledge we are angry. There is no shame in feeling angry. It is a perfectly human emotion. God himself is angry from time to time so it is okay to feel this way. You can’t do anything with this emotion if you don’t acknowledge it. 

Second step away and reflect. Once you have acknowledged you are angry step away and go somewhere you can be alone and really think about why you feel this way. Was something pointed out that made you feel inadequate? Did something violate your beliefs? Ask why you are so angry? Ask if there is any fault to whatever happened on your end? Is there some steps you can take that can bring some good to the situation? 

Third pray about it and talk to someone you trust about it. Tell them what happened. Tell God about what happened and seek his guidance. In doing this you might discover something you didn’t know or consider that just might change your feeling completely. You may even discover this is a wonderful opportunity for growth if you have the courage to take it. 

Fourth take action. Once you have cooled down, thought about it, prayed about it, sought guidance, and gained some perspective if there is an action that needs taking then take it. If you need to apologize then do so. If it means having a difficult conversation then do it. If it means making some scary changes then do it. If it means changing your stance on something then do so. Anger can be a wonderful tool for growth and change or it can be the seed of destruction if abused. How it affects you is up to you. 

Prayer:

Lord, help me to respond to anger in a healthy way. When I am angry guide me.  Help still my tongue and actions so they aren’t used to hurt. Instead help me to stop, think, pray, and then act. Help me transform my anger into a tool to help build your kingdom. Amen. 

Song of Meditation: 

Psalm 86:7

When I’m in trouble, I will call out to you.    And you will answer me.

Psalm 34: 8

8 Taste and see that the Lord is good.    Blessed is the person who goes to him for safety.

As good as life gets that just how bad it can get. My family and I are just emerging from a very bad time right now. We have finally begun to reach the other side and we are headed back into the good times. This bad time was more of a series of troubles that hit us hard and in quick succession. For me, there was one particular piece of trouble that truly devastated me. I am talking it caused me so much heartbreak it left me broken and hollow. 

 Almost nine months ago now I found out I was pregnant with our fourth child. A moment of panic as I processed how to handle four kids and that was quickly followed by pure joy. The moment that test turned positive I was in love. My husband was in love and because I was already starting to poke out a bit at a couple weeks we decided to share the news. Our children were so excited to be expecting another sibling. Then during my 9 weeks check up we discovered I had had a miscarriage. It had been the first pregnancy I felt secure enough about everything to go to my appointments without my husband. I remember realizing I wouldn’t be able to drive home and still sobbing so hard I also knew I couldn’t make a phone call either. So I stilled my shaking hands long enough to send a short text to my husband that read: “Bad news...I lost the baby.” 

My husband managed to get me on the phone for a minute and it became clear he needed to pick me up. The church secretary came along as my husband had all three kids with him. It was silence on the way home and I was broken. I just went numb and my world stopped turning. My husband dropped me home first and then left with the kids to take the church secretary back to the church. During this time I laid on my bed and just sobbed. When I came to a moment where I had paused from all the crying I lifted up a prayer. I simply said: “God, I don’t feel much like talking. I don’t think I can for a while. I hurt too much, but please hold me. Don’t leave me. Walk with me. I need your comfort right now. Amen” 

That was it. God answered me. He did indeed give me great comfort. He didn’t take away the pain but he made sure to carry what I couldn’t bear. The biggest display of his comfort was after I had a procedure to remove my dead baby. The doctor informed my husband that my body had begun to reabsorb the baby and there wasn’t much left to remove. It explained why I didn’t have much bleeding. Knowing my baby would always be with me gave much-needed comfort during one of the worst days of my life. He knew I had been agonizing over not having anything to bury and gave me a way to keep my child. It gave me such peace to know my baby could live through me and it still does. 

When we come to God with our troubles and worries he walks that painful path with us. He may not change what happened but he’ll make sure we aren’t alone if we just ask. If we can trust him with our trouble he will comfort us where he can carry what we can’t. He is our Father and he is a Father that will never let you down. You just have to have the courage to embrace him in your darkest times and let him love you.  

Prayer: 

Lord, be with me in times I feel so much pain I lose my words. Be with me when my heart is broken. Be with me when I feel alone. Walk alongside me and comfort me in times of trouble when it is easy for me to drift and doubt. In those times remind me to pull you close and fight the urge to push you away. Amen. 

Song of Meditation:

1 John 5:14

14 Here is what we can be sure of when we come to God in prayer. If we ask anything in keeping with what he wants, he hears us.

Many of us, my self-included, go to prayer only with our own interests in mind. We really want an A on our exam and we send up a prayer. A loved one gets sick and we desperately pray for their healing.  We tend to treat him like our own personal Santa Claus and so when we don’t get what we want we get mad. We think God must not love us or that he must not be real after all, but prayer doesn’t work that way. God doesn’t ask us to pray so he can give us what we think is best, prayer is their so you can build a deep personal relationship with him. It isn’t a miracle hotline. 

I think back to a story my parents shared a few times over the years. My nana was my father’s mother. She was a short little Korean who you really didn’t want to cross. She had a little fire in her. So when she became ill and was diagnosed with diabetes my father and mother prayed for her to be healed. God didn’t answer that prayer. He didn’t heal her and for a long time, they couldn’t understand why God wouldn’t heal her. Fast forward several years later. My parents now had two kids. My older brother and myself. When I was in eighth grade I began to have tonic-clonic seizures, petit mal seizures, absence seizures, and I was officially diagnosed with Epilepsy. An incurable neurological disorder. What they couldn’t have known when they asked for my Nana to be healed was how influential she would be to me because of how she handled her own medical problems. The example she set for me in how to handle a tough medical condition became a much-needed crutch in a time when I was having seizures all the time. She showed me how to accept it with grace and still enjoy life. If she had been healed I would not have had an example to look up to and instead of being a fighter I may have given in and taken my own life when things got tough. 

God will hear your prayers but sometimes his answer is no or even not now. We tend to forget we can only see a tiny picture of what is in front of us and God has the big picture. He knows what needs to happen for the wonderful things he has in store for you. Sometimes what we want and or think should happen would actually deprive us of the wonderful joy he wants so desperately to give us. Sometimes to get the real blessings you’ve got to take a few lumps. 

Prayer: 

Dear Lord, help me to accept your unanswered prayers. Comfort me when your answer is no. Help me to be still and wait when your answer is not now. Help me to embrace your plan for me and help me to use prayer the way it was meant to be used. Amen. 

Song of Meditation:

Proverbs 31:8

8 Speak up for those who can’t speak for themselves.    Speak up for the rights of all those who are poor.

With the last God Speak Devotion, we talked about when to shut up. Today we are talking about when to speak up. I can think of one example from my childhood. I like many people have dealt with my fair share of bullies. In elementary school, I had this nasty habit of making really awesome friends with the kid that ended up having to move. This often meant I would have one year with plenty of friends and another with hardly any. It was exhausting. At the time I was maybe just starting 2nd grade and I didn’t have much confidence at first that I was going to make new friends this year. Perhaps I was slipping into a permanent social slump. It didn’t start well at all. In my school, the cheerleaders tended to be mean to any girl that wasn’t part of their group and for some reason, they decided I wasn’t up to snuff. Maybe it was the fact I was terrible at sports or maybe it was because I was naturally introverted and shy. I’ll never know, but they decided to exclude me. They also happened to be in my class which meant it was social suicide to be my friend. So imagine my surprise when a girl that had been deemed cool and one of them told them she was going to invite me over to eat with them. I was, of course, sitting by myself. They then quickly told her I wasn’t welcome to eat with them. That she was cool and I wasn’t. They didn’t eat with dorks. She looked at them and told them she was going to eat with me then. They then told her if she ate lunch with me they couldn’t be friends. She quickly got up and said: “ Fine. I don’t want to be your friend. I am sitting with her.” 

I didn’t have words as she plopped down in the seat facing me and said hi. We became good friends and soon our group of friends was bigger because she invited everyone over that wasn’t up to snuff and not cool by these cheerleaders standards. Suddenly all the “loser” kids had friends and we even sat together. The “cool” kids table became quite small in comparison. She taught me so much, not at that time, but when I got older and reflected on what happened. She stood up and spoke up for those of us who felt powerless to change our social situation. She knew what they were doing wasn’t right and spoke up against. Not only that but she took action to rectify the wrong and pulled us helpless ones together and helped us find our own power. She did so even when pressured not to. She did so at the expense of a so-called cool reputation. She decided not to take part in that attitude and gladly gave up being cool to be my friend. 

We are to speak up for those who can’t. We are to defend those who are helpless. We use our voice to try and help those who are having wrongs poured down on them by others. It is our duty to help them. Even if it means losing a couple friends or a job. You just might have to lose something, but what you will be given will be greater. My friend gave up being cool but ended up being the most popular kid in class because they knew her heart was genuine. Not only that but she showed a kid ready to give up that she still mattered. Just imagine the good you can do by simply doing the right thing.

Prayer:  

Lord, help me to know when to speak up and give me the courage to speak up. In those times fill me with the right words and actions. Give me a heart of love, grace, and mercy. Help me see those who need me to stand for them. Help me be your hands, feet, and voice. In your name, Amen. 

Song of Meditation: 

Romans 14: 1-4

Accept the one whose faith is weak, without quarreling over disputable matters. 2 One person’s faith allows them to eat anything, but another, whose faith is weak, eats only vegetables.3 The one who eats everything must not treat with contempt the one who does not, and the one who does not eat everything must not judge the one who does, for God has accepted them. 4 Who are you to judge someone else’s servant? To their own master, servants stand or fall. And they will stand, for the Lord is able to make them stand.

I remember one day at college I was walking along campus and trying to rush to my next class. As I rushed I saw a bit of a crowd instead of the usual students with heads down trying to get to class. So out of curiosity, I took a peak. This man had set up a large sign that read: “Fags are going to hell” (Note: I don’t condone that language or support it) He also had a portable microphone and was shouting at kids walking by that they were going to hell. He didn’t seem to care that he had never known these people. He just passed judgment. Some students who were Christians brought out their bible or cell phone and began to quarrel with this man. While I heard some students in the back mutter this is why God wasn’t real or at the very least was a cruel bastard. Another few laughed it off and shouted: “Stop arguing. You won’t get through to that knucklehead!” I must admit if I hadn’t been in hurry I may have tried to quarrel with this man as well. Didn’t he see the damage being done? What I didn’t realize is that stop arguing comment was actually good advice. 

First, we have a man who has put himself on equal footing with God and somehow thinks it is his duty to pass judgment. A man that probably feeds on a good verbal battle. Why else stand in such a public place with a microphone with a sign that just begs you to argue with him? The problem is that when we argue we are doing the same thing we found so vile in that man. We decide we are right and must save this man from himself because surely he is the one going to hell...right? See what happens? Everyone judges and it builds up an unhealthy anger between them that could easily turn to hate. By indulging in the argument you become just as bad as him. 

Now I am not saying you can’t have a healthy debate between friends, but this wasn’t healthy. I dare say it was a live action version of something you might see in a Facebook comment section. What should we take from this? 

1. We should never judge. It isn’t our place. We have no way of truly knowing that person’s heart or who they really are. 

2. We need to learn arguing because we have decided our position is right and everyone else is wrong is never healthy. That kind of arguing births hate and builds thick walls between God and those who have not yet found him. 

Sometimes it takes far more courage to realize words are useless and that we should be seen and not heard. 

Prayer:

Lord help me to know when you to quiet my words and when it is the right time to speak up. Help me to withhold judgment.  Help your grace to evident through my actions. Let people see your love and grace through me. Help me to be the person you need me to be. Amen. 

Song of Meditation:

Luke 6: 43-45

43 “No good tree bears bad fruit, nor does a bad tree bear good fruit.44 Each tree is recognized by its own fruit. People do not pick figs from thornbushes, or grapes from briers. 45 A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.

I will never forget the summer day when I was still a kid that my family got back from our vacation. I don’t remember where we had gone, but I was oddly looking forward to getting home and pouring myself some raisin bran cereal. So when we got home I flew in the door and went right for that cereal. I didn’t stop to look at the food or milk I was pouring. I was hungry and eager for my cereal. I practically jogged to the family room plaid couch to sit down and eat my glorious bowl of cereal. I happily took a large bite of my cereal swimming in milk and boy was I disappointed. I scrunched up my face and spit out my cereal as the taste of sour milk hit my tongue. I raced back to the kitchen, threw out my cereal which was now ruined by sour milk and then dumped the rest of the milk down the drain. I then drank a giant glass of water to get that nasty flavor off of my tongue. 

No good could come from that milk. It was bad. There was no fixing it and making it yummy. Bad milk is just that bad. Even worse was that it ruined perfectly good cereal and left an awful lingering flavor in my mouth. Not to mention the grand disappointment I felt at not being able to enjoy the cereal I had been dreaming about. 

Our hearts can be like that milk. If you let it go bad it infects everything and everyone around you like a disease. People get hurt and your soul begins to rot. God who has wonderful dreams for you that are beyond imagining are ruined and God becomes disappointed at seeing all that you could be and have and instead seeing everything around you rot. 

Unlike milk that can’t be fixed when it goes bad your heart can be. If you ask God to take over and ask him to transform you he will slowly throw away the bad and the rotten and replace it with his goodness. He can give you a life full of joy and things you need but didn’t know you needed. The transformation may be painful, but it is far worse to walk around with a rotten heart hurting everyone you touch. 

Prayer: 

Lord, come into my heart and take over. Don’t just in a box but take over entirely. Transform me so that my heart reeks of goodness and remove the rotten. Make me so I produce good fruit. Help me to want and embrace this change. Hold me and comfort me during the difficult and painful parts. Give me the courage to keep moving forward on the path you have set for me. Amen.

Song of Meditation:

Luke 6: 36-38

36 Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.

Judging Others

37 “Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. 38 Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”

Just the other day I was scrolling my Facebook Newsfeed and a video popped up and out of curiosity, I clicked on it.  As I watched this video I just knew there was going to be trouble in the comment section. I knew it was going to bring up theological differences and things just might get nasty in there. Giving in to my curiosity I clicked on comments and began to read. What I saw broke my heart. There hundreds of people judging and spewing hate and most of them claiming to be followers of Jesus. The few who weren’t cited the very bickering they saw in the comments as the reasons they couldn’t believe in God.  So many people shouting: “ If you don’t believe like me, then you aren’t Christian. If you don’t believe like me God won’t love you.” 

This shameful display of judgment, condemnation, and just plain hate brought the above passage to the forefront of my mind. As I thought of this verse I began to think what right do I or any other person have to remove God from his throne and do His Job for him? What right do we have to tell people God won’t love them. To tell others God won’t love them is the same as telling God who he can and can’t love.  

God sees more than we do. He can see what’s in their hearts and he is the one who IS the word. If anyone understands it and is the word to its core it is God. God is the only one anywhere near qualified to pass judgement on others. While we may think we know it all the truth is there is much we don’t know and will probably never know. The only way to grow strong in our faith is realizing we are probably wrong about a great many things and being willing to admit to someone that they just might be right and we just might be wrong. 

Prayer: 

Dear Lord, help me to see people as you see them. Help me to suspend judgement and love others. It is hard for me. It is so much easier to judge and I must admit that sometimes passing judgement makes me feel good about myself. Help me know the diffrence between judging others and lovingly expressing concern. Help me to know when to speak up when I see someone stumbling and to know when it is best to keep my words to myself. In your name. Amen. 

Song of Meditiation:

2 Corinthians 12: 19-21

19 Have you been thinking all along that we have been defending ourselves to you? We have been speaking in the sight of God as those in Christ; and everything we do, dear friends, is for your strengthening.20 For I am afraid that when I come I may not find you as I want you to be, and you may not find me as you want me to be. I fear that there may be discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, slander, gossip, arrogance and disorder. 21 I am afraid that when I come again my God will humble me before you, and I will be grieved over many who have sinned earlier and have not repented of the impurity, sexual sin, and debauchery in which they have indulged.

Expectations...they sure can be disappointing can’t they? We expect things to go a certain way. We expect people to live into our moral standards and fall in line with what we think and when things don’t go our way we turn into that screaming toddler in the middle of the grocery store whose mom just told them they can’t have a package of chocolate bars. We huff, puff, scream, shout, and lash out. We get so upset we might even try and hurt a few feelings along the way. This can be especially true in the church and among God’s people. 

As a person who loves to help others in pain or those who are emotionally upset, I have heard my share of stories. Much of these stories had pain caused by different expectations. The story that comes to mind is not one as a pastor’s wife but instead when I was in my twenties, attending a college-aged youth group, and still single. I attended a very contemporary church. The kind with a stage, praise brand, videos, dramas, and no altar in sight. No pews but rows and rows of plush seats with cup holders for your morning coffee. 

I attended this church’s college-age youth group. In a church with several services and hundreds who attend it was the only way to connect and get to know people. You could attend years and still not know a single person. When I first began attending this group our church had not yet built the new and fancy building it would move into in the future. This building was smaller and gave our group a more intimate feel. It was easy to hear each other, get to know each other, and support each other when we felt we weren’t measuring up. 

Then change came as it always does. Our youth pastors job shifted into a worship role and we now had a new pastor. All was well at first. Then suddenly we left the comfort of our church and began to have a youth group at a local coffee shop. At first, it was nice. We could purchase a smoothie, have our youth group, and meet new people who joined us every week.  Then as our group grew space became tight. 

Suddenly we couldn’t hear the songs or the pastor speak over the noise. There weren’t enough seats and people had to sit on the filthy floor. Some even stood outside in the cold hoping to hear what the pastor had to say. A group that was once strong and united became broken and fragmented as we no longer had the space to talk anymore. No one ever stayed after to make plans to hang out anymore because they just wanted to breathe again.  We called out to our pastor asking to return to the church. This simply wasn’t working anymore. But he refused to hear and chose to stay because of the opportunity to reach new people. 

Suddenly our expectations weren’t met. We expected our pastor to hear our needs and adjust accordingly. Our pastor expected us to put aside our comfort in hopes of spreading the word to just one more person. Suddenly we became angry as we felt ignored. We also became divided as our group became clicky and gossip and jealousy began to fester. There were those closest to the front who had the pastor’s ear and whose needs were met and the rest who felt like we had been abandoned. 

Because of our different expectation, our anger, and unwillingness to embrace change and meet in the middle, the group began to shrink. When the new building was built the group was moved to the church, but that core group that made the group strong had gone. Now people never stayed for more than a few weeks before feeling like something was missing and moving on. The service felt dead and no longer challenged those coming. It felt as if God had been kicked out and eventually the group died. While I was at that church the attempts to resurrect it failed. What happened after I can’t be sure, but I do know that a group that was once thriving and strong, became weak and died because of stubbornness. Our personal feeling tossed God out on his rear leaving us fractured, broken, and making people feel unwelcome in the end. Because of that, God was no longer the center and his church can’t thrive without him as the center. Just like us. If God isn’t our center. If we don’t make changes, adjustments, and realize it isn’t all about us we too will become weak and spiritually frail.  We may even spiritually die and never truly live. 

Prayer

Lord help me see your path and give me the courage to follow it no matter how uncomfortable it may make me. Help me embrace the change you set before my feet. Help me be a part of your plan. Help me make your church thrive. Correct me clearly when I stand in your way. In your name Amen. 

Song of Meditation

2 Thessalonians 3: 1-5

As for other matters, brothers and sisters, pray for us that the message of the Lord may spread rapidly and be honored, just as it was with you. 2 And pray that we may be delivered from wicked and evil people, for not everyone has faith. 3 But the Lord is faithful, and he will strengthen you and protect you from the evil one. 4 We have confidence in the Lord that you are doing and will continue to do the things we command. 5 May the Lord direct your hearts into God’s love and Christ’s perseverance.

All you have to do is to switch on the news to discover that the evil one is alive and at work in this world. People maim murder, cheat and steal. People who claim to love God spew hate and build thick walls between God and those who are still lost. It’s everywhere and it can be easy to fall into the trap, but God does offer us protection. I am thinking of something that happened to me recently. 

As I have shared before I am just recently coming out from under a rough time. During this rough time, I wasn’t at my best and was ripe for attack. My mother in law became sick (she is now blessfully recovered), I had a miscarriage, my uncle died, my youngest had a seizure, and I had my first seizure in 9 years. Amongst all this chaos our family unit was struggling. Things were tense as we all processed everything that happened and were forced to try and continue on with the everyday activities of life. My children are very young and acted out as they processed the death of their unborn sibling and struggled with seeing someone who was dead for the first time.  We sought a family counselor to help us through this difficult time. One particular morning at church I was very tense and on edge and in my grand imperfectness as a flawed human being I said a swear word in church when my children began to act out...yet again.

Now understand we live in a small town and many in this town still hold to some traditional ideas. They also expect a pastor’s wife to be somewhat perfect. Now I will say right now the church my husband’s pastors at is not like the rest of the town. They are a beacon of love and acceptance and have been my solid rock through my difficult times. The community surrounding the church, however, is not so loving. Word spread about my slip up and my openness about my struggles and our family seeking professional help only added more fuel to the fire.  Suddenly rumor spread that I was becoming unhinged and was not mentally fit to be a mother. People talked about how they thought CPS should show up at our door and take our kids away.  Some even thought I would hurt my children. 

When word reached my ears I was devastated. I was only beginning to heal from all the turmoil in my life and this left me broken on the floor. I felt betrayed and questioned who I could trust. When I moved to town I instantly loved it and now I felt this new town I lived in was hostile and would attack at any moment.  I withdrew into isolation to process and heal my broken heart. The Lord stepped up and offered me defense through the church. The new congregation who was and is still getting to know me stepped up and defended me against those smearing my reputation. They shut down the rumor mill in its tracks, defended my honor, and forced those who attacked me to ask themselves if they really thought they would be flawless in similar circumstances. God and the church became my personal superhero and protected me from any further damage. They gave me the time and grace I needed to pull myself back together. They even restored my faith in people and this town by having my back. I will always be grateful for my superheroes at the church and my superhero of a heavenly father. 

There is no need to fear the enemy. While you may still end up with some hurt feelings and a broken heart, God will stand up to defend you. The secret is telling him your trouble and doing what he asks you to do. In my case, I took the time I needed and allowed my husband to share with the church what was going on. This allowed God to act on my behalf. He will do the same for you if you let him. 

Prayer: 

Lord, protect and defend me from the evil one. Defend me against those who mean me harm. Help me to have love and compassion for those who try and hurt me. Help me to see them as you do. Help me to forgive them as you would. Help me to be more like you and help me through the darkness. Be my superhero, lord. Amen. 

Songs of Meditation

Galatians 3:28

28 There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.

Hate has caught on like a wildfire that won’t be put out. Hate is like a contagious disease and we’ve had an outbreak. Humanity gets so caught up on focusing on what’s different that we forget we are all brothers and sisters in Christ. We see a hurting an economy and find a scapegoat to bully and blame. We see someone who is Jewish, Muslim, Buddhist, or any other faith and call them terrorists because they don’t believe as we do. We see two girls holding hands and call them cruel names because they must be gay. Never mind that perhaps in their culture it is simply a way of showing affection to a friend or family member. I think fondly of my Korean cousin holding my hand tightly and affectionately at our first meeting in Korea. In the US we might have been called gay but there we were just two happy cousins that couldn’t believe we were actually meeting each other. 

God doesn’t see skin color, hair color, or eye color. He doesn’t hear different languages. He doesn’t see all the different ways we have come up with to divide ourselves into our separate little groups. He doesn’t see an us or them. What he sees is our hearts. What he sees is his children and many of them desperately lost.  He is that parent pleading for his kids to just please get along.  He is asking us to stop all the petty bickering and love each other. He just sees his children and constantly nudging us to put aside our differences and just love each other. Just think of what this world could be like if we just approached everyone and everything in love. 

Prayer

Lord help me to see people as you do. Help me to love people as you do. Help me to forgive as you do. Help me to have compassion, grace, and empathy as you do. Cure the disease of hate within me and help me spread your cure. Amen.

Song of Meditation

Psalm 95: 6-7

6 Come, let us bow down in worship,    let us kneel before the Lord our Maker; 7 for he is our God    and we are the people of his pasture,    the flock under his care.

There was a time in my life that I didn’t much see the point in worship. I hated singing hymns and praise songs, in fact, I’m still a bit lazy about that. I even at one point in my life stopped going to church. I was disgusted with the church and figured I believed in God why do I need the church? Why do I need to worship? So for a long while, I chose to stay home. I would much rather use that time to kick back and relax. 

Do you know what happened during my time away? My faith became stale. I stopped learning about God. I stopped praying what little prayer I used to do. I stopped singing to him. I stopped living my faith. I became a lukewarm Christian, the kind of believer that God spits out. I became one of those Christians those who don’t believe scoff at. I said one thing and often acted another way. 

Worst of all I took him for granted. I forgot all the hard times he carried me through. I forgot about his love and forgiveness. I became lost and what was worse I had no idea I was lost. It wasn’t until I met my husband and began to see worship in a new way that I realized just how awful I had become.

I realized worship kept my soul healthy and thriving. I realized it was the one time God received thanks from me. It was the time I humbled myself before him and realized just how awesome he was. I realized the others there were there because they to were flawed but held hope of becoming someone better and knowing they would be accepted. Maybe that acceptance didn’t come from family or peers but it would come from God. It was the one place I could be held accountable for my actions so I wouldn’t ever get so lost without being aware of it again. 

Worship is here to keep us connected. It is our way of growing our relationship with God. It is the way to self-reflect and see what needs improvement. It is a way of growing our faith by communing with others. It’s about building our selves up so we can truly go out and reflect God. It is the one time to focus on the Lord your God and know him and hear him. Worship keeps our faith strong and without our faith shrivels up and disappears. 

Prayer

Dear Lord, help me to see the importance of worship. Give me a hunger to worship you. Help me find the right place to worship with the right people. Lead me to a community as open, loving, accepting, and forgiving as you are. Keep me far from places that would seek to build a wall between us. Help me find your house where I can passionately worship you. Amen.

Song of Meditation

Philippians 2: 14-16a

14 Do everything without grumbling or arguing, 15 so that you may become blameless and pure, “children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation.”[a] Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky 16 as you hold firmly to the word of life. And then I will be able to boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor in vain.

How many of us grumble and complain when our alarm goes off in the morning signaling the start of another day? How many of us have gotten into some pointless argument with a stranger on social media? How many of us fought with a loved one? When you look around society, complaining seems to be the in the thing to do. 

It is cool to whine and grumble about your husband not doing anything. It is cool to poke fun at dad’s and portray them as bumbling idiots. We hear a comment we don’t agree with and make it our mission to respond with anger and change their minds. It’s cool to shame moms when they don’t parent the way we do. It is fun to blame younger generations for today’s problems. It can be so easy to fall into this trap. I know I have. 

I hated my job at the grocery store, but there was probably someone looking for a paycheck that would have loved it. I could grumble about my husband’s flaws or focus on why I love him and look past his flaws. Instead of responding with anger and arguing I can ask myself why I am so angry and why that person thinks differently. I could blame younger generations or take a look at myself and ask if some of the things I blame others for could possibly be my fault. 

Next time you catch yourself about to grumble and complain stop yourself, take a couple deep breaths and turn it around. Instead of thinking about how you have to work think about how you GET to work. Instead of complaining about your sore knee praise God you can walk. Instead of complaining about your spouse think of all the wonderful things they have done. Instead of judging another parent think about how much they must really love their child to be trying so hard. Instead of complaining about having to wake up early think of how you have been given another day of life. Do your best to turn it around because even in the darkest of times there is something to be grateful for. 

Prayer

Lord, help me to truly appreciate and recognize the blessings in my life. Help me to be that shining star in this crooked and messed up world. Let me be that person that makes them ask questions. Let my faith be seen in my actions so that when I express it in words there is s no doubt in a seeker’s mind of your love and grace. Help me be what you call me to be. Amen

Song of Meditation